


The Flame

by Rexicorn



Series: Phoenix Rising [2]
Category: The Royal Romance (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, BAMF Women, Birthday Fluff, Birthday Smut, But Also Not Compliant, Canon Compliant, Complete, F/M, Feminist Themes, Found Family, Full Playthrough, Love Triangles, Main Character Original Backstory, Modern Royalty, More Smut For the Sequel, POV Alternating, POV Multiple, Pixelberry, Romance, Sad Drake, Sad Liam, Sad Victoria, Sometimes This Goes More Against Canon Than I Planned, True Love, Unrequited Love, iRex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:40:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 26
Words: 127,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22148050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rexicorn/pseuds/Rexicorn
Summary: Victoria has lost Liam before she ever really had him. Working with the Beaumonts and her friends, her only goal left now is to clear her name of the scandal with Tariq and the hope that the dark secrets of her past remain buried.Liam didn't know how badly he could hurt someone until the night of Coronation Ball and if he thought that was as bad as it would get, he will learn over the course of the subsequent months just how hard it is to be the one wearing the crown. The one hope left is for him to undo the harm that befell Victoria under his care.Drake never wanted to be more wrong about something than when he predicted Victoria would be burned at court. But while helps to work to clear her name, there is a small, shameful part of him that can't help but hope that with Liam taken, Victoria might open her heart to him after all.
Relationships: Drake Walker/Main Character (The Royal Romance), Liam/Main Character (The Royal Romance)
Series: Phoenix Rising [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1365226
Comments: 98
Kudos: 55





	1. The Days

* * *

**The Days**

_You had a chance and you took it on me, then I made a promise that I couldn’t keep_

Victoria pulled out her phone and checked the time again. Her flight would be calling its passengers soon enough. She sighed and found herself tapping and swiping until the article came up again. She’d read it so many times since she’d arrived at the airport five hours ago that the words were bored into her brain. “ _Prince Humiliated By Unfaithful Suitor_ “. The writing was speculative, but all pointed towards the evidence of her dallying with an ‘unknown male’ while she was under consideration for Prince Liam's bride-to-be. Never mind that the first shot didn’t even show her face, yet Tariq was identifiable if you knew who he was.

There were three pictures in all. That first one was the one the article had run with as the main image. Her back on view to the whole world, the wrecked skin of her scar visible to all, though her messed up tattoo at least was obscured enough that it would be impossible to discern what the word had said once upon a time. The next photo showed her in profile before Tariq had tried to kiss her. Her expression was neutral, but she knew how she’d felt in that moment. The shock of being caught half-naked within the safety of her own room. The final picture was the one that showed her face. It had been taken as she’d turned around to reach into her bag for her clothes. The image was all her. There was no sign in the background of the fight that had been going on at the time. No shots of Drake at all, even after he’d entered her room and gotten rid of Tariq for her.

She sighed. She had been in situations before where she’d had to think fast and react to unwanted advances. She’d always managed to land on the fighting side of fight or flight. She knew freezing was a common reaction, but she had never dreamed _she_ would have frozen in the face of someone trying to kiss her while she stood shocked in her underwear.

In the hours since the Coronation Ball other news outlets had picked up the story and run with it. It had broken five hours ago a little before eleven, but now it was the top story in every section of Cordonian press. Papers that had been kind to her when she was the darling of the competition were now spewing vitriolic articles about how she had betrayed all their trust. Was this reason enough to keep commoners out of the running in the future, was a question posed by one editorial. Another delved into what they perceived her mindset to be, that of a cold, calculating man-eater perhaps? One very cruel article blew up the picture of her back and proclaimed her to be the hunchback of New York. That hurt. It all hurt.

Her news was the top story, but the press was giving some focus to the engagement of Liam and Madeleine. Victoria couldn’t help but think of how Madeleine must have been livid at the thought of coming in second to her story. Ana de Luca had released an article for Trend which included a photo story of the pair; from the Derby onwards as Madeleine had been absent at the Masquerade Ball. There were no images from last night, which was something. Victoria didn’t think she would have been able to stomach them. She had no doubt they would come; Liam had his bride and his coronation was coming up. He had a busy life now, becoming a King and a husband within a few months of each celebration. He had everything he needed to be the man Cordonia needed to rule them. He didn’t need her.

Victoria closed the news app and went to her messages again. There were all the messages from Maxwell while she had been otherwise occupied. Sitting with Olivia and hearing the truth about her family and how the threat of exposure was enough to send her running. And before that, in the centre of the maze with Liam. Where he had told her he loved her and all but swore he would propose to her and then they’d made love, right there on the grass, bathed in moonlight. It had been romantic and perfect and then the dream had shattered.

Victoria didn’t have any tears left to summon. She felt numb. She’d snatched a few minutes of sleep here and there, watched over by a pair of royal guards who surveyed her with stony faces. No-one had called, no-one had sent a message. Her last was from Maxwell almost six hours ago: “ _Almost time. Sending out search party now!_ ”

That search party had been Maxwell and his brother, Bertrand, the brothers Beaumont who had sponsored her throughout the competition, though that had been a joke. Sponsorship implied monetary support, which had not existed for her. In hindsight, the crystal-clear vision of looking back over the last six months, her actions had been wildly irresponsible. She had racked up a hefty chunk of credit card debt and she’d spent almost all of her savings on the caterers for the Beaumont Bash. It felt so long ago and suddenly seemed so unimportant. The last of her money had been spent in the airport on a one-way ticket back to New York, economy class of course. There were no direct flights so she was due to get a flight at four am to fly to London, England, and then get a connecting flight to New York six hours after landing in the UK. And then what?

She’d already called the person she’d sublet her apartment to and learned that the landlord had found out about the underhand arrangements and terminated her lease. It was fair enough; she’d not followed any of the rules for subletting, hadn’t even let her landlord know. She had acted on impulse and now she was homeless. Everything she had was in the duffel bag beside her feet. She bitterly regretted leaving behind the fancy gowns; they were the only assets she had and she should have kept them to sell even if she would have had to pay baggage handling fees with her ticket. She was stupid. She was so, so stupid.

“Now boarding economy class for passengers of flight PB205” came the announcement over the tannoy. Victoria grabbed her bag and her ticket and passport and stood.

“Goodbye Cordonia,” she said, casting a glance outside at the dark sky outside the windows. She was leaving under cover of darkness, disappearing into the night. No-one would miss her. She started to towards the gate.

*

_Earlier That Night_

Drake took the stairs slowly. He was still trying to catch his breath after running after the car that had borne away Victoria Quinn. He was rubbing his jaw; catching Bastien still outside after he’d been the one to drag her out of the ball had led to him seeing red and he’d launched himself sloppily at Bastien, who had countered with one good blow. It made sense: Drakes heart hadn’t really been in it. His heart was hurting and a good piece of it was travelling away with Quinn, whether she knew it or not. It was ironic that his emotions had caused him to lash out at Bastien, the person who he was currently blaming for removing Victoria, when in truth all he’d wanted was to have Bastien hug him and tell him it would all be OK. He hadn’t felt quite such a need for a father figure in years.

Once upstairs he found himself tracing the steps towards Victoria's room. He pushed the door open to find that he was not the only one with that idea. Hana turned to him as he walked in, Liam was sitting at the desk, his head in his hands. “Figured you’d both be here.”

“Oh, Drake, is she really gone?” Hana sounded close to tears, but her mouth was set into the angriest line he’d ever seen on her face. Drake nodded curtly.

“I couldn’t catch the car,” he said. “No surprise really, what was I thinking trying to run as fast as a car. Not sure what compelled me to chase it like a damn dog, but well… she’s gone.”

Hana wrung her hands fretfully. “Where are they taking her?”

“Beats me,” Drake said with a heavy shrug, though as he thought on it he happened upon the answer. “I guess the airport? Back to the States? Hey, maybe we can call a taxi and head her off there. Bring her back?” His voice was getting more animated as he spoke, a plan half forming in his mind.

“Could we?” Hana asked. “I have to leave in the morning, back to Shanghai. Oh, I feel so useless!”

“No.” Drake and Hana turned towards the haggard voice. Liam was still sitting in the same position as he spoke. He sounded broken. “We can’t bring her back.” Drake saw Hana flinch at the words and he frowned to hear Liam's tone. “I promised I would protect her and when it came to it, she was hurt and taken away all while I watched. There was nothing I could do. Goddamnit,” he stood and in the same motion swept his fist across the desk, swiping at a vanity mirror, which slid off the wooden top and smashed to the ground. “It isn’t right, what happened here this evening. Not for her. And I let it happen.”

Drake shared a glance with Hana and stepped towards his best friend. “Hey now, we’ve got to think clearly right now.”

“How can you be so calm?” Hana wanted to know, her voice a few octaves higher now. Drake took a breath, he didn’t need either of them freaking out.

“The thing I expected to happen, happened,” he said darkly. “The court treats people like shit, especially commoners. She was a threat to someone and they took care of it. Doesn’t mean I’m happy about it, believe me, I wish I’d been wrong. I wish she was still here with us and—” his voice cracked so he stopped to compose himself, rubbing his hand over his jaw as if he could catch the words that would provoke his tears and crush them. “It would have been a miracle for Quinn to make it through this in one piece. But it’s happened now. We have to be calm for her. Everyone is going to be watching Liam to see what he does next.”

Hana turned concerned eyes on Liam. “What _are_ you going to do now, Liam?”

Liam was holding his hand where he shoved the mirror. Drake could see it would leave a bruise; those vanities were heavy things. When he spoke after a pause it was with a more put together voice. “I’ve got to be careful,” he said first. “I have no idea who was plotting against Victoria or how deep this treachery runs. Duchess Olivia left tonight just before the…the speeches, also under duress.”

“What?” Drake asked. “She did?”

“Do you think the person responsible for the news story on Victoria was also working against Olivia?” Hana asked, piecing everything together. Liam nodded.

“I’d say that’s quite possible.” He replied. “It’s likely they were seeking to push me towards Madeleine.”

“Hang on, you think Madeleine did this?” Drake asked, his fist clenching.

“Not necessarily,” Liam said. “But of the three front runners, as the press coined them, she was the only one not threatened.”

“So, you played into their hands?” Hana asked sombrely, but Liam looked up and met her gaze. Drake saw something sorrowful pass over his face.

“I didn’t know what else to do,” Liam said slowly. “I thought if they had the illusion of a win, whoever it was would back off. I didn’t appreciate that Victoria would be taken away. God, what must she think of all this?” He turned and ran his hands over his face.

Hana also looked close to tears again. “Poor Victoria.”

Drake looked down and steeled himself. “Yes, we all agree that this is awful, but we need to make a real plan. Not stand around feeling sorry or blaming ourselves,” he said pointedly at Liam. “Liam, what do we do? We can’t let her leave.”

“No, you’re right,” Liam admitted finally. “But I can’t get her and nor can you, Drake. You’re too close to me and people know that. They’ll be able to realise I’m reaching out to her through you. Hana, is there no way you can stay?”

Hana shook her head. “Not unless there’s a good enough reason to convince my parents that my being here is worthwhile. A potential match or a position in court…something like that would help.”

Liam nodded. “Of course. Leave that with me. I’ll insist Madeleine finds somewhere for you.”

“Do you think you can convince Madeleine to keep me around?” Hana asked. “She has made no bones of the fact that she finds me insipid.”

“Madeleine should be pretty happy right about now,” Liam grimaced. “But she’ll have to give me something if she wants me to act happy, too. The least she can do is let my friend stay at court.”

Hana smiled through her worry. “Thank you, Liam. I am glad to hear that you consider me a friend, as I do you.” Liam smiled back. “If we can get Victoria back to court I’ll be able to keep an eye out for you.”

“Exactly,” Liam said. “Once we get her back to court it’ll be easier to help her.”

“What if you can’t?” Drake asked bluntly. “What if she won’t come back? What if she’s had enough of jumping through hoops and getting beaten down anyway?”

Liam looked up and met his gaze. He looked stoic, but Drake could see the pain in his face. “Then I will have to let her go and wish her well.”

Drake broke, turning his face away from Liam's heartache. It was like staring straight into the sun, too blinding and overwhelming to look directly at it. The guilt in his friends' voice was heavy and thick. “So, who’s going to get her back?”

“It’ll have to be the Beaumonts,” Liam said. “She’s part of their house and they have a right to keep her with them. If she wants to.”

“I’m sure she’ll come back,” Hana said, sounding more positive now they had some sort of plan. “She cares about you, Liam.”

“Yeah,” Drake agreed weakly. “Plus Quinns tough. She’ll want to find out who had it in for her, I’m sure.”

“I hope so,” Liam said. Then he straightened himself. “I better go find out what happened to Bertrand and Maxwell and speak to them about getting Victoria back.”

*

She wasn’t sure what prompted her to turn around after all, but Victoria paused before she could cross the threshold from the lounge. Her hand caught on the doorway and she stopped, looking over her shoulder. Was she leaving? Just like that? Could she not make a home for herself here in Cordonia, in the place that had captured her heart even if she couldn’t have the man she loved?

The royal guards surveyed her but did nothing to prompt her to go. She dithered, unsure which way she should be stepping. The announcement for the final call rung out. Still she waited.

Then she heard it.

“Victoria? Victoria! Wait!” Victoria looked up and there was Maxwell, red in the face from running, heading towards her at full pelt. She didn’t think, she just dropped her bag and strode into his arms. They melted together in a hug, Victoria clutching him as if he had just pulled her to shore, he struggling to catch his breath as he squeezed her.

Bertrand came up behind Maxwell, meeting the guards as they came over with a sharp tongue. “You will keep your distance from the Duke of Ramsford or you will suffer the consequences.” He snarled officiously. “Now there is no further use for you here and you will depart at once. This woman is not a security threat, she is a member of my house and I will not see her ill-treated anymore this day.”

The guards exchanged a weary look and started to depart. Victoria was not sorry to see them go as she pulled back from Maxwell.

“What are you guys doing here?” She asked. Her voice wobbled as she asked: “I thought you were angry with me.”

“What?” Maxwell gasped. “No! Why?”

“Well, you put your faith in me,” she shrugged helplessly. “And I let you down.”

“ _You_ didn’t,” Maxwell insisted, but she stepped further back and turned to Bertrand with a wince, waiting. If either of them were going to scold it would be him. Bertrand walked over to her and looked her square in the eye.

“Just tell me straight,” he said. “were you carrying on a secret romance with Tariq?”

“Of course not—” Maxwell began, but Bertrand cut in: “I want to hear it from Victoria.”

She looked back at Bertrand. “I barely said two words to him the whole season. The story in the papers is not true at all. He came into my room at Applewood while I was getting changed and…” Her eyes flickered down to the floor, unable to meet either warm brown stare.

Bertrand nodded. “Very well. Then you were set up.”

Victoria looked from one to the other again. “Wait, that’s it? You trust me just like that?”

“Of course,” Bertrand said. “You are a member of House Beaumont. We stand by you. And by the way, I believe you handled yourself impeccably throughout this dreadful evening.”

Maxwell threw his arms around her again, just as her lip started trembling. “We would have been here sooner, but palace security wouldn’t let us leave for ages. As soon as we got free we headed here at once. We couldn’t let you leave, not like this.”

Victoria leaned into him. “You guys… I thought everyone had already forgotten me.”

“Never,” Maxwell murmured fiercely.

Bertrand went to collect Victorias bag and said briskly, “Come along. We should get home.”

Home… Victoria couldn’t speak for a few moments. She couldn’t quite believe they’d actually come for her. She hadn’t expected to be claimed and yet…she’d hesitated instead of getting on the plane. Maybe she had hoped. “I’m grateful you’ve come to get me.” She hesitated. She didn’t want to question what the point was or indicate that as glad as she was to see them, she couldn’t help but wish it had been Liam coming to get her. Maybe it was better to leave the sentence half-finished. It really would have seemed ungrateful.

Maxwell tugged on her shoulder and started walking them out of the airport. She was too tired to protest. She let herself be lead to a waiting car and driven back to the Beaumonts. She had intended to talk more for the journey but was asleep before they’d left the airport parking lot.

*

Later Victoria felt Maxwell gently shake her awake. She’d slept through the entire journey to Beaumont Manor and let Maxwell lead her upstairs and back into her old room, where she barely made it out of her jeans before collapsing into the bed and sleeping another six hours of the deepest sleep she’d ever had.

It was gone noon when she woke, grateful that the Beaumonts had let her sleep in. She sat up and looked around. She was really back here. The strange night—was it really only last night?— had ended in a way that had completely blindsided her. Victoria had hoped she would have been able to stay at the palace, in proximity to her fiancé and now she was here, no ring, no fiancé and no hope. The only thing she could control was the chance of possibly clearing her name. Maybe that wouldn’t make a difference, but it was the truth and she needed the world to know it. She needed Liam to know. She hadn’t betrayed him. She’d meant everything she’d said to him in the maze and before that. She loved him deeply, desperately.

Victoria hugged her knees to her. So he was marrying Madeleine. That was painful, but she had to accept that. He’d done his duty to the realm being engaged by his Coronation. Madeleine would probably be a fantastic queen. Everything had fallen neatly into place for everyone else. Victoria would have to live with knowing that she and Liam had shared something magical over the last six months and it had ended now. That was the reality. And at least, she reasoned as she got up and pulled on some clothes, she would be too busy sorting her life out and starting over to bother with the future King and Queen of Cordina. If nothing else, space would help.

She pushed her hands into her hoodie pocket and headed downstairs to find something to eat as her stomach was practically roaring at her, never mind rumbling. She found the brothers taking lunch outside and they smiled as she approached. “Thanks for letting me sleep, guys,” she said, flopping down into a chair.

“You seemed like you needed it,” Maxwell said. “Have some eggs.”

Bertrand poured her a black coffee as she dished up eggs and bacon onto her plate. “Now, I’m afraid we will have to get to work shortly.”

Victoria took a long sip of coffee and peered at him over the rim. “Clearing my name?”

“Yes, that.” Bertrand hesitated. “Have you seen the papers?”

“Yep,” she said shortly. “News travels fast.”

“Inaccurate news,” Bertrand corrected, even though they were already all on the same page. “Now, I’m no master of spin, but I will do my best to work with them to put you in the best light. That will mean that your behaviour will have to be utterly impeccable.”

“Try saying that three times fast,” Maxwell quipped. Victoria offered a ghost of a smile in response. Her head was turning.

“Wait, Bertrand, who’s going to be looking at me?” She asked. “I thought clearing my name would be an away from the prying eyes of the press kind of thing. Like, I stay here and maybe give an interview to tell the truth?” When they shared a look she groaned, and put down her fork. “What is it?”

Maxwell leaned over and touched her hand. “The thing is…we kind of have to go on the Royal Engagement tour.”

“Yes, that is the unfortunate thing about discerning what happened to you is that we have to follow the royal court around and the focus after the Coronation will be gearing up for the King and Countess Madeleines royal engagement tour, so…”

“So what?” Victoria asked, her appetite disappearing now. “Tell me straight what that means for me. Please.”

Bertrand looked at her with the most tender expression she had ever seen on him. “We three will be part of the tour, meaning parties, engagements and everything else that you know from the social season, but with the added elements leading up to the wedding in December.” He sat back with a thoughtful look. “In an ideal situation you would have a role in the court.”

“It means seeing everyone again,” Maxwell continued gently. “Cordonia needs to see that all the nobles are behind the royal couple, so we have to act like we support this at least in public.”

“Meanwhile we’ll be sowing the seeds of the truth to clear your name,” Bertrand added. “We need to find where this scheme came from. Who gave Tariq the idea that you were interested in him and how they enabled him to find you and photograph the moment.”

Victoria sighed. “I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t know how to face him.”

Maxwell hummed sympathetically and reached his hand across the table to her. Victoria felt his warm palm cover hers with a squeeze and her heart thumped sadly, though she smiled tiredly back at him. “We’ll be with you the whole time.” He promised. “We’re going to help you any way we can.”

“Thanks Maxwell.” Victoria’s voice was thin. She looked over at his brother. “Thank you, too, Bertrand. I’m so glad to have you both with me.” She took a deep breath, blinking back tears and settling her heart back into place. “I can’t tell you that I’m excited about the tour, but I get it. What’s a little more trauma I guess? But I want to learn more about… everything. I want to know what I’m walking into in advance, please. Teach me about the Royal Tour. I’m ready to learn.”


	2. Where Does the Good Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria officially re-enters high society for the first event of the engagement tour.

_How do you live so happily while I am sad and broken down?_

As the next three weeks progressed Victoria worked harder than she ever had. She diligently listened to every lesson by Bertrand, whether it was on fork placement, tasting wine, the history of Cordonia, or correct ways to address varying dignitaries. She wrote notes and scoured them each night, trying to drive the information into her brain through sheer force of will. She started running, in part because Maxwell had decided to start his own regime and wanted company, but also because she could feel herself sliding into a black hole and knowing what that felt like she was determined to combat the hole with as much dopamine as she could produce with fresh air and athletics. She learned that the boys had a pool and despite the cold air that October was bringing in, she ensured she swam every day. She was like a woman possessed. If she had to be part of this tour she was damn sure she was going to be ready.

The brothers surprised her the night before they left with a wardrobe filled with dresses and smart suits, which she knew had to have cost a bomb. Maxwell had apparently insisted on treating her this time and she gathered they’d sold some centuries-old art pieces to fund her through this tour. She had been overcome by their gesture, not least because they’d been paying attention to her style and had tried to match it the best they could. They’d remembered her insecurities over her scars and ensured to buy clothes that would cover them, which was kind of laughable now she told them, as the whole world could see them in grainy photographs if they wanted to. But even so, that had been touching.

Victoria still had her trusty navy shoes, the only real item of clothing she’d worn during the fancy engagements from the season. Other than that she’d left the clothes behind. She couldn’t decide if she ought to regret that now or not. Even the shoes were teeming with memories. She recalled how she’d left them in the maze to guide Liam to her hiding place, though he hadn’t needed them. Thinking about the maze gave her an uncomfortable swooping feeling deep within her, something complicated. Excitement and desire mixed with dread and horror. It made her sick so she shoved the shoes away, determined not to wear them if she could help it.

The only time Victoria was alone was when the Beaumonts attended King Liam's coronation. It took place only a few days after the ball where Victoria had been exposed and it was far too raw for her to even consider attending. Bertrand happened to agree with her, but mostly because they were keeping it under wraps that she was at the Manor. All the papers were pushing the “fact” that she was back in America, living a life of shame and obscurity. Victoria had tried to keep busy on the day, but curiosity had lead to her seeking out a news station that was streaming the event live and she’d managed to watch maybe twenty minutes of Liam bedecked in a long fur-lined cloak and the fanciest, most kingly outfit underneath. And then that crown. She remembered he’d once told her it looked heavy because it was; so designed as to remind the wearer of the weight of their responsibility to the people. He’d looked so serene as he was crowned. This was what his life had lead to. Her heart ached to watch him on the screen of her phone and she’d switched it off when Madeleine had been pictured beside him waving and smiling, her arm around him.

Her phone existed these days as a thing to watch, rather than an actual means of receiving calls. It had rung over the past weeks, but always from reporters trying to track her down and eke out the story as long as they could. She had messages from reporters asking her why she did it, whether she was with Tariq now if there had been others, how she got her scars. Nothing she cared to talk about and not a one from anyone asking for her side or whether it was true. They had photos and opinions and that passed for news apparently. Victoria had leapt every time it rang at first, expecting it to be Hana or Drake or maybe even Liam. Nobody she considered a friend had called.

Finally the trio headed for Fydelia because, as Victoria had reasoned darkly, why not kick off the tour at Madeleine's home turf?

“Does anyone know I’m coming?” she wanted to know when they were half an hour away. “God, I’m not gate crashing am I?”

“No, of course not,” Bertrand replied. “We’ve quietly let it be known that you are living with us again and are joining the tour as a representative from House Beaumont. This news didn’t seem to cause shock waves, so it’s possible Countess Madeleine was expecting this.”

“But the press have no idea?”

Bertrand shook his head. “No, they can be surprised,” he explained. “But in order for things to run smoothly, it was only proper to let the family know we're all coming.”

“So…” Victoria felt herself flush as she spoke, and she looked down, suddenly very interested in a loose thread on her jacket. “Does Liam know I’m coming today?”

Maxwell looked sympathetically at her. “I expect so. But look, I’ll stay with you the whole time tonight, OK? I’m not about to leave you alone.”

Victoria smiled weakly. “Thanks, Maxwell. And you Bertrand, thank you.”

“No thanks necessary,” Bertrand said with a cough. “Now, let’s go over the history of Fydelia one more time…”

*

The estate in Fydelia was gorgeous because of course it was, Victoria thought as she was shown to her room. The house was quietly dramatic, with the look of a turreted chateau, gleaming white shutters at every window and sweeping trails of roses along the stonework. Inside the decor was effortlessly, elegantly renaissance. The whole place seemed to be softly showcasing it’s beauty without any need for overt displays. It was all so cool and calm. Not unlike Madeleine herself, though she was not present to greet them. Victoria was glad of this, though her pulse was leaping frantically every time she heard footsteps. Which would be worse? To bump into Madeleine or Liam? Both, she decided after a moment’s deliberation.

Her guest room was pale blue, cream and gold. It was incredibly fancy and it made her nervous just to be inside it. She didn’t have a drink but she suddenly felt as if she were balancing red wine and might spill it everywhere. This would make for pleasant and relaxing dreams she thought.

Maxwell looked about with impressed eyes. “This is really nice. I sort of expected you to be put up in a broom cupboard or the stables or something.”

Victoria set down her trunk (on loan from Bertrand who had insisted she needed better than her holdall) and hung up her garment bags in the wardrobe. “Yeah, it’s nice. I guess she’s trying to show off how rich she is. Rub my face in everything I don’t have.”

“Now, let’s think about what you’re going to wear tonight,” Bertrand said. “We’ve obviously stocked you with a small collection for various functions, but tonight is your formal reentry into high society. It has to be perfect.”

Victoria shrugged. “I was going to go for black. Like my mood.”

“See now, that’s what I mean,” Bertrand said stepping forward to the garment bags. “We need to think about what you dress will say about you; black would be totally the wrong thing. It will look like you’ve given up.”

“Plus we didn’t buy you anything black.” Maxwell shrugged. “Nobody better die or you’ll be the only brightly dressed one at the funeral.”

“Black is tough,” Victoria countered, not really listening to Maxwell. “Black says I mean business. Black is the colour of someone who doesn’t take any shit. Why do you think I chose that for my hair?”

“You dye your hair?” Maxwell asked, curious. “I didn’t realise.”

Victoria gritted her teeth. “Yeah, I guess that isn’t a big secret or anything, but I don’t really broadcast it. Hana knew.”

“What’s your natural colour?” Maxwell asked. Now he was lying on the bed, propped on one elbow.

“The same colour as my dads, so can we drop it?” She snapped over her shoulder. Maxwell closed his mouth. There was a moments silence and Bertrand cleared his throat politely. “So your dress. There isn’t any black, but perhaps we can add that for the future. For tonight I was thinking perhaps this.” He unzipped a bag and displayed a long gown of gunmetal grey. “It’s the closest to black and although the front is open the back is structured and there’s a neckpiece to keep it all where it should be. I think it rather ticks all the boxes.”

Victoria swallowed, grateful that they hadn’t pulled her up on her rudeness or pressed her further. And the dress was very nice; tailored to hug her figure to the floor. She nodded. “Yes, this is the one.”

A few hours later she was dressed and ready to go down. Maxwell and Bertrand were back to escort her. She opened her mouth to apologise to Maxwell, but he took her arm before she could speak. “You look stunning.” He said warmly. “No one's going to want to mess with you.”

“Thanks, Maxwell,” she replied thankfully. Her hair was back in its usual chignon, pulled off her face tightly. She’d gone back to basics with a smokey eye, though perhaps it was heavier than usual. She was wearing a pair of black shoes that had the highest spiked heels that were probably not the most in keeping with the style of the court but made her feel better. If anyone looked at her funny she could always skewer them with her stiletto. Or not, but the dream was comforting. “Let's go. I’m ready to show everyone I’m back and that I’m not hiding anymore.”

“Game face, on!” Maxwell grinned and together the three of them headed down, Bertrand leading, the other two following arm in arm.

With each clack of her heel on the stairs, Victoria felt another drop of dread shiver down her spine, like cold sweat, but she forced her back upright as if there were an iron rod keeping her that way. She had to project confidence even if she didn’t feel it.

Within moments of the Beamonts entering the hall, Victoria heard gasps and whispers begin. She kept her face a calm mask, even has her pulse roared in her ears.

She took in ladies and gentlemen she’d met during the season and realised immediately that she was the darkest, sharpest dressed figure. That felt good, to be the slice of austere amongst the pastels and florals. She spied Penelope and Kiara to one side.

“It’s lady Victoria!” Penelope gaped. Kiara tutted and shook her head.

“Mon dieu! I cannot believe she’d dare show her face here…”

And then the press clocked her. She arranged her features into a cool, mirthless smile and she heard them discuss her and snap photographs of her for their papers. Despite her outward indifference, she couldn’t help but tighten her grip on Maxwell's arm. This was a lot all at once. He grinned at her. “You’re doing great. And now everyone knows. That’s over with.” he murmured to her as if they were sharing a private joke. She let out a tinkling laugh.

“I feel like I might actually die right here, right now,” she muttered back, smiling coyly. He nodded as if she’d made an excellent point.

“Not on my watch.”

The first person was approaching her to speak directly to her and it was someone she did not recognise. Just as she was internally debating whether or not that was a good thing, the woman gave her a once over and greeted her. “You must be the infamous Lady Victoria.”

“Yes,” Victoria replied, pleased that her voice was normal sounding. “That is, in fact, my full title.”

The woman quirked her mouth into a smile. “How bold of you to attend,” she said approvingly. “It would be such a boring party without a little scandal, don’t you think? Welcome to Fydelia.”

Victoria's mind whirred. Not only did this woman seem keen on the idea of infamy, but she was also welcoming her. That surely meant she had to be related to the family who lived here and looking at her again more closer Victoria could see a family resemblance. She also recalled Bertrand advising her that Madeleine and her mom were very different people. She decided to chance it. “Welcome? That must make you Madeleines mother?” _Please_ …

“Shrewd.” she replied with a nod. “I’m Adelaide.”

Victoria dropped into a curtsey, as much as the tight gown would allow. “My Lady, it’s an honour to be here.”

“You know, the press has been saying that you are an uncouth American who jilted King Liam,” Adelaide said, crossing one arm over her chest and gesturing with the other hand, which held a full glass of champagne. “I am glad of the opportunity to meet with you in person; the press does have a way of twisting the truth. We have had our fair share of stories aimed at Madeleine after the business with the former Crown Prince.” Victoria was surprised to see a slight quirk in Adelaide's mouth as she spoke. Her gaze was unreadable, but was that a flicker of a smirk? “I look forward to seeing more of you so that I may best make up my mind about you, lady Victoria.” Adelaide passed her gaze from Victoria to Maxwell with a stern look. “Now you…I believe everything I’ve heard about you.”

“You are looking as lovely as ever, Lady Adelaide,” Maxwell said smoothly.

“Lord Maxwell Beaumont,” she spat. “You have quite a bit of explaining to do.” Victoria glanced at Maxwell, but he looked unconcerned. “How is it that I’m never invited to these legendary Beaumont parties I’ve heard so much about?”

Now Victoria could see the teasing expression under the faux-cross one. She was losing her touch at reading people. That or she was on edge. It was probably that one, she reflected.

“Oh, that must’ve been a terrible oversight on our part.” Maxwell blustered.

Victoria smiled at Adelaide. “I’ll make sure you’re on the guestlist for the next one.” She said easily. “Of course, it probably won’t be until the new year. Everyone will be busy before then.”

Adelaide grinned at her, knocking back her drink in one. Victoria tried not to stare; she’d never seen anyone handle the bubbles in champagne with such ease. “See that you do and I might forgive you.” She stepped back and observed the pair, arm in arm. “Now, what a darling couple you two make.”

Victoria took a moment to consider which way to go with this. “Thank you. We think so, too.”

Maxwell went along with it swiftly. “Yep, that’s us. A pair of darlings.”

“Very sweet indeed. Now, you had best go pay your respects to my daughter. Don’t let me keep you.” And with that she was off looking for more champagne.

Victoria let out a breath. “That was…more nerve-wracking thank I expected.”

“Nobody would ever have known.” Maxwell said. “Come on. She’s right; we should find Madeleine.”

“Ok,” Victoria said gloomily. “Let's get it over with.”

Maxwell guided them across the room until Madeleine loomed into view. She was finishing up a conversation with a pair of older ladies. She looked good, Victoria had to admit. She was wearing a high necked deep green silk dress, which Victoria could see had a completely open back. A stab of pain hit Victoria as she took in the expanse of peach flawless skin. As Madeleine turned as if spotting them for the first time, she saw a glimpse of something calculating in her eyes. Her gown had been a deliberate choice and showing off her unscarred and beautiful back had been no accident either. Victoria stumbled on her next step, but Maxwell was holding her tighter than she realised and so she was able to style it out. At that moment she could have kissed Maxwell. Thank God for him.

“Lord Maxwell,” Madeleine said as if she was so pleased to see him. Her face was flushed with happiness and she looked completely in her element. In control. “And Lady Victoria. I am so pleased that your recent fall from grace didn’t keep you away. A lesser woman more well-versed in courtly politics might have gone into hiding. It’s so brave of you to be here.”

Victoria kept her face impassive, even as she pictured driving her shoe into the flimsy satin things Madeleine had on her feet. “Lady Madeleine. I just wanted to say congratulations on your engagement. You must be so happy.”

“Thank you dear,” she replied in a voice dripping with condescension. “I’ve never been happier. With all of the royal commitments, the Coronation for one, it’s been a bit of a whirlwind. But you know how King Liam is. He makes me feel like I’m in a fairytale.”

Victoria felt her free handball into a fist. A memory flashed into her head of her mother meeting one of her fathers many other women. She had been nine, watching her mom exchange fake pleasantries with this woman, using the same techniques to speak in riddles that had mostly flown over her young head until her mom had clearly had enough and swung for her. The woman had ended up with a broken leg and a piece of scalp missing. Her mom had lost a tooth and added to her growing criminal record, but Victoria remembered her explaining in the hospital that “the bitch had it coming”. In that moment she wanted to swing wildly like her mom had, consequences be damned. The bitch had it coming. But then her hand relaxed again. It wasn’t worth it, not for her mom back then, not for her now. Victoria nodded. “That sounds just… precious, Lady Madeleine.”

Madeleine threw her a simpering smile and glanced over Victoria's shoulder. “I know we’ll be very content. Won’t we, darling?”

_Oh, God._

Victoria felt her stomach clench painfully and her heart started pounding so loudly that she was sure everyone could hear. As she turned she felt discomfort creep all over her as though a hundred spiders were scurrying up and down her back.

“Victoria?”

Liam was right there. Within her grasp. Victoria raised her eyes, heavy as they suddenly felt, to meet his gaze for a brief moment before she had to look away. She was almost the same height as him in her towering heels. He looked at her with so many different emotions flashing across his face. Then he gathered himself at the Kingly facade slipped back into place. “Ahem. I mean Lady Victoria. I am surprised to see you.” He was holding two flutes and handed one along to Madeleine. Of course, he was getting her a drink. They were engaged after all. Victoria’s stomach flipped over. What else did he do for her? “You look… well as stunning as ever.”

No, not stunning, she thought. Tough. Only she didn’t feel tough. She felt stupid. What was she doing here? Madeleine had the ring on her finger, she now saw as she so calmly lifted her drink with her left hand. The diamond flashed in the light. And Liam was just there, looking no different to how he’d looked the last time she’d seen him almost a month ago, but he was different, everything was different. The last time they’d been alone together they’d shared something magical and special and now he was just someone else's fiancé. The King. Oh shit, she needed to curtsy, didn’t she? And probably say something, too, this silence had dragged out too long. Madeleine was giving her a smug look. Liam's blue eyes were creasing in concern. _Don’t_ , she thought. _Don’t you dare pity me._

“I…” she started, but her throat was dry. She coughed lightly. “I think we need to meet Bertrand.” Victoria turned her head towards Maxwell.

Maxwell patted her hand. “Yes, that’s right.” He looked to Liam and nodded. “It’s good to see you, Your Majesty.”

“Victoria…” Liam started, but Madeleine put her hand on his arm.

“Darling.” she purred. “We need to see to our other guests.” She leaned over to kiss Liam's cheek. Victoria flinched. She couldn’t help it. _Just don’t cry. Not here._ “Being the royal couple of the hour has its obligations.”

“Yes, of course.” Liam said wearily. “Lady Victoria. Lord Maxwell.” Together Liam and Madeleine headed off to circulate.

Maxwell tugged gently on Victorias hand, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “You did—”

“Awful. That was awful.” Victoria moaned. “Maxwell, what am I doing here?”

“Come on, let’s find Bertrand,” Maxwell said in a soothing tone, but it was no good.

“I can’t do this,” Victoria said, her eyes uncomfortably hot. “I can’t.”

“You can and you will,” Maxwell said calmly. “You just have to get through dinner and then we can make our excuses. Come on, you can do this.”

Victoria let herself be taken to a table. Never before had she been so glad to be sat at the back, far away from Liam and Madeleine's table. Bertrand had found their seats and was pulling out a chair for her when she heard her name and Victoria turned to see Penelope and Kiara bearing down on her.

“Victoria!” Penelope smiled warmly, pulling her into a hug. Victoria was too surprised to react. “I’m so happy to see you! And I love your dress, is it new?”

“Er…”

Kiara cleared her throat sharply. “Penelope, what are you doing? Even if Lady Victoria was someone we deigned to associate with, we’re on Madeleines side now.”

“Oh, right.” Penelope said, looking downcast. She stepped back from Victoria, who turned to Kiara.

“I thought we were friends.” Victoria said. Penelope looked like she might cry now.

“We are.” she insisted weakly. Kiara softened slightly.

“Friendship doesn’t really have anything to do with it,” she admitted. “Look, Madeleine made us her ladies-in-waiting, which rather means we’re expected to be unfailingly loyal to her.”

“It’s a huge, huge honour,” Penelope said.

“Well, then,” Victoria said gathering herself. “Thank you for letting me know.”

“It was the least we could do,” Penelope said with a smile. Apparently, that would be all it would take to shift that sad face for Penelope. Victoria felt a pang of envy for her simplicity and then felt mean. She offered an anaemic smile. Kiara looked back at the top table.

“We should go. We might even get into trouble for talking with you this long.” Kiara didn’t seem to want to meet her eye anymore. “Come on Penelope.”

“Bye Victoria.”

Victoria slid into her chair. She didn’t have anything to say. Looking up she realised her seat had a simply wonderful view of the top table. Thanks, Madeleine.

“It’s their loss.” Maxwell said breezily. “We’re more fun at this table.”

“It seems like Madeleine has wasted no time consolidating power,” Bertrand said. “She’s a clever woman and we mustn’t forget that or underestimate her. Unfortunately, we’re not in a position to offer anything to potential allies, which means we’re at a disadvantage.”

“That’s OK,” Maxwell said exuberantly. “We don’t need anyone else. We’ve got each other.”

Victoria was looking at her hands and hardly listening. Her fingers felt so bare. She’d never realised before how much she wished there was a ring on her finger, but then again she’d never wanted one before. She’d never dreamed she’d meet someone she could imagine spending the rest of her life with. Hr parents had stayed married up until their deaths despite how miserable they’d made each other. That had rather soured the notion of marriage for Victoria, until Liam. He changed everything. Everything. Once upon a time she didn’t need anyone. She was perfectly content to be her alone. An island. Now she missed people. It wasn’t just him either. “Where are Hana and Drake?” She asked quietly. “Why aren’t they here?”

“Hana hasn’t returned to court,” Bertrand said softly.

“And Drake is just Drake,” Maxwell said. “I’m sure he’s around but you know, he hates all this stuff.”

“So it really is just us three?” Victoria asked, rubbing her hand over her left ring finger without thinking as she looked up at the brothers. “Maybe this isn’t worth it. I don’t want to make you guys social outcasts with me.”

Bertrand took a deep breath and set his brow firmly. “Victoria, we are not going to talk about this again so listen carefully. We are here to clear your name. You are a victim of a cruel setup and I will not stand idly by and let that happen to you. We are going to get this court to see the truth and then they are all going to apologise to you and treat you with the respect you deserve. Are we clear?”

Victoria chewed on her lip, fighting tears. She nodded once, that was all she could manage.

“Good. Now, I spoke to some reporters and they seem to think that your best chance at present at clearing your name is to bring Tariq on board to make a statement of his account of that night.” Bertrand said. “Where do you think he stands.”

“I’m not sure.” Victoria said. “I still don’t know where he got the idea that I wanted anything from him. I guess it doesn’t hurt to ask him though.”

“I bet we can shame him into telling the truth,” Maxwell said confidently. “The sleaze.”

“We’re agreed then,” Bertrand said. “We need to find Tariq and get him to join our cause. I will see if we can track him down.”

Victoria nodded. She looked up and her gaze fell on Liam and Madeleine. Liam was looking over to her table and she felt her heart skip a beat as she met his glance. She wasn’t sure she’d be able to eat and she hoped the meal would be over quickly.

*

Back in her room later Victoria quickly pulled the gown off. It was saturated with sweat from the discomfort of the evening. Thank goodness it was a dark colour. She pulled her hair loose and pulled on comfortable clothing, then scrubbed at her face with makeup removing wipes. She was ready to crawl into bed and sleep for years when there was a knock at the door. Victoria was prepared to ignore it until Maxwell called through the door that it was only him.

When she opened the door Victoria saw a bunch of two dozen deep red roses, with Maxwell hovering behind the arrangement. “Um, thanks Maxwell…”

“It’s not from me,” Maxwell said, coming in and setting down the vase. “I’m just the delivery boy.”

Victoria reached over and touched her finger along one velvet petal. The colour was intense, a truly dark red and each stem was tall and proud. She slid her hand down to the thorns and her finger snagged on a piece of paper wrapped around one of the stems in the middle.

“What’s this?” She pulled out the rose and unfurled the note. The neat script leapt out at her and she had to read it three times to get the order of the words right in her brain. 

“ _I wouldn’t blame you if you’re furious with me, but please meet me so I can at least explain. I’ll be in my room all evening if you will give me some of your time_.”

Maxwell peered over her shoulder. “That’s Liam's writing.”

“I know.”

“Are you going to go?” Maxwell asked. “I knew he wouldn’t be able to wait long before finding some time with you.”

Victoria sank onto her bed. “I…I don’t know. I couldn’t even speak to him earlier.”

“Yeah, but this’ll be in _private_ ,” Maxwell said. “You guys can speak freely that way.” He glanced at the door. “Trouble is you guys couldn’t actually be further away from each other. I guess he didn’t know your room number. Do you want me to take him a note? Explain that to him?”

Victoria sighed. “Where is Liam's room? Is it on this floor?”

“Oh yeah,” Maxwell nodded. “The same side of the house and everything, it’s just all the way down the corridor that way.” He gestured in the general direction he was describing. Victoria nodded.

“Ok. Thanks.” Then without a backwards glance she headed for her window, pulled it open and scrambled outside onto a thick ledge beneath her window. Maxwell shouted in protest, but she shimmied along before he could reach her. And if she fell at least she wouldn’t have to see Liam and Madeleine together again, so that was a silver lining. She chuckled darkly to herself as she climbed. She was on her way. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is one of my favourites by Teagan and Sara, Where Does the Good Go? 
> 
> Well after posting the first chapter I was bowled over by the lovely comments so thank you all for that! I have been continuing to panic and fret though, as this story is very much the story of my MC; I delve deeper into Victorias secrets and her past in this fic, amongst the backdrop of the plot of book 2 of TRR. It's very much the story I want to read, I just hope it's enjoyable to others. Fingers crossed!


	3. A Case Of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A secret meeting with Liam gives Victoria more information about that night and old friends return.

_You taste so bitter, but you taste so sweet_

Halfway around the building Victoria's hands and bare feet started to hurt and she began to think better of this plan. The stone was cold on this side of the house, with the sun going down on the opposite side and the chill was creeping into her skin. She hadn’t grabbed anything warm and the breeze flew through her t-shirt with a shiver. She clung on as she climbed, determination winning and propelling her forwards. Liam was damn right about one thing: she _was_ furious. She had been so busy being sad and hopeless that she hadn’t even noticed the anger rumbling underneath the pain.

Liam had let her be dragged away in shame, not once speaking up for her and then he had chosen Madeleine over her. She was angry alright.

She came to the last window, glad that it was still early enough for everyone to still be downstairs dancing. That meant there was nobody to spy her daredevil attempt to reach Liam's room. Victoria wondered what Maxwell was doing. She’d turned a corner so could no longer see if he was hanging out of her window anymore. Would he go get Bertrand? She felt a small flush of worry; they’d both been so kind to her, so fiercely on her side that she would hate to upset them now that she thought of it. Bertrand had told her the most important thing for her to do was be perfect and there was sense in that. This was probably the complete opposite course he would have charted for her.

But she had to see Liam, didn’t she? He had invited her after all. Maybe seeing him alone would cut through the noise of her feelings and help her see some reason, make some decision about how she definitively felt.

Maybe he’d tell her he’d gotten it all wrong and would leave Madeleine that night for her. Victoria snorted derisively as she came up to his window. Yeah. Right.

There was a small balcony outside his windows, so she clambered over the wall and dropped to the stone floor. She crouched, catching her breath, wincing through the sharp bolt of pain that shot up her bare ankle at the cold and the impact. Then she looked around.

The balcony was small, but big enough for a wrought iron table and two matching chairs. The view over the hills below was spectacular and for a moment Victoria was transported back to Lythikos and his balcony at the lodge. The hot tub, the candlelight, the stars above. It felt like a decade ago now. The french windows were shut and Victoria peered through the glass. There was no-one there. She reached for the handle and tried it.

Locked, of course.

Victoria felt laughter bubble up and she hugged herself in the cold, and giggled somewhat hysterically. This was just typical and felt more than a little indicative of this whole season. Putting herself through trials and hardships only to end up being locked out in the cold. She doubled over with laughter. When the laughing fit subsided, she hiccoughed twice then pulled out a chair. She considered going back, but needed a breather first if she was going to do her daring climb a second time. She really hadn’t thought this through. The metal chair was cold, but so was she so Victoria leaned back and brought up one foot so she could rest her chin on her knee, wrapping her hands loosely around her leg. She looked out over the valleys and hills. Even in October, the view was beautiful. The vista of the grounds of Madeleine's estate and beyond into Fydelia looked like a painting. There were poplar trees below and she watched them sway in the breeze. Everyone and everything bowed to Madeleine, the conquering hero.

The lock suddenly turned in the windows and Victoria glanced back to them. Well, at least she’d found the right room. She stood up slowly as Liam opened the window. “Victoria, come inside, you must be frozen.”

Victoria _was_ frozen for a moment at the sight of him. That King mask was gone, he was Liam, the man she knew so well. Or thought she did. Her feet didn’t want to move, so Liam stepped out and reached for her, concern all over his face. Victoria found her strength and her voice all at once. She shoved back from him, refusing to be drawn into an embrace even if she was cold.

“Don’t touch me.” She barked, backing up to the wall. His eyes flashed with pain, then widened in fear.

“Victoria, please,” he said quickly. “Just come inside. I won’t…I won’t touch you. Just get away from the edge, please.”

With her hands on the wall, she realised how low it was, how easy it would be to slip. Typical Madeleine having unsafe balconies. Victoria clenched her jaw and walked into the room, where Liam stood well back and then closed the windows again. Victoria stopped halfway through the room and turned. He was still standing by the window, afraid to move. They didn’t speak.

“Are…are you cold?” Liam eventually asked in a quiet, uneasy voice. “I was waylaid coming back to my room. I’m…sorry.”

It was the last word that triggered it. Victoria snapped and spun towards the door, grabbing the handle and intending to wrench it open. That was the wrong kind of apology. The door didn’t move. “You locked it?”

“I always lock it,” Liam explained. “I didn’t know you’d be outside…how did you even get there?”

“I climbed,” Victoria said, still facing the door. “Didn’t want to embarrass you by coming to your door while people were all over the corridor. We’re hardly close neighbours. I guess she knew I’d do something like this. Guess I’m a predictable screw-up.”

Liam was quiet as she talked. She heard a rustle of fabric behind her. “Please, you must be so cold.”

Another mirthless laugh dropped from her mouth. He was so concerned with her damn temperature. She turned to see him standing by the bed holding a chunky knitted cardigan. She had never seen him wearing anything quite so casual and she felt an odd ache in her chest to see this comforting item of clothing. Without realising what she was doing she stumbled over to him and reached out to touch the cardigan. How was such a simple piece of fabric causing her such pain? Liam held open the cardigan and she slipped her arms inside, with him tugging it closed over her chest. She just let him, looking down. His scent was all over this cardigan and she quietly breathed it in. His hands dropped to his sides, making good on his promise. Victoria looked up at him, so much shorter in bare feet, just like during their private moment in the maze at the Masquerade ball.

“I’ve missed you so much Victoria,” he murmured, drinking in her appearance before him.

“You let me go,” she replied starkly.

“I know.” Liam nodded, still gazing down at her. “I wish I hadn’t.”

“Are you…going to ask about…?” Victoria started, hesitating over the question. Liam gave her a solemn smile.

“The photos?” he supplied helpfully. “No. I know it was a setup.”

The words felt like a blow to her stomach and for a moment she was winded and confused. “Really? But….why…?”

“Why did I choose Madeleine?” She didn’t even need to speak in full sentences; it seemed he knew exactly what she was asking again. Liam sighed darkly. “Someone went to great lengths to try to stop us from being together. When I think of them invading your privacy, putting you in a… compromising position, putting you at such a risk…” Liam's face clouded in fury. “Believe me Victoria, I didn’t for one moment believe the photographic ‘evidence’, but Drake filled me in on the circumstances afterwards.”

At this Victoria broke her gaze. Drakes name caused her a flush of guilt as she imagined what had happened after Tariq. If photos of _that_ kiss had gotten out she didn’t imagine Liam would be standing here defending her.

Liam was still talking and she raised her head, pushing aside complicated thoughts of Drake Walker.

“Someone is determined to prevent you from becoming queen and it seems they have considerable resources and access to court. If I had stood up there and chosen you, Victoria…” He sighed and turned, sinking onto his bed, running his hands through his hair. “I failed you in so many ways Victoria. I thought you would be protected here, especially at Applewood. That was the safest place I knew, yet you were brought to harm because of me. I couldn’t put you in further danger by defying the threat to you. I couldn’t choose you, but I wanted to.” He looked up at her, his hair a mess from his fingers. “God, I wanted to stand there and tell the whole court that I loved you and was going to spend my life with you…I was so proud of my choice and of you and I never thought…”

Victoria shifted as he spoke. He looked sincere, but she still had questions. “I still don’t understand,” she said. “Something bad had happened, but it happened _to_ me, not _because_ of me. I didn’t get a chance to explain to anyone and now they all think it’s true…” her voice wobbled, but she pressed on. “But if you’d just stopped Bastien from taking me away I could have explained. I was treated like a criminal. Like I’d tried to murder someone instead of being the victim of an assault.” Her eyes prickled but she was speaking now, more frankly than she’d spoken about the night at Applewood and the night at the Coronation ball and she couldn’t stop there. She needed to get these words out of her before they took root and festered. “I didn’t do anything to hurt anyone, it was _me_ who was hurt. Why did you let them take me away? Why didn’t you say something? You just stood there and got engaged to Madeleine.”

Liam looked away. His elbows rested on his knees, his hands were steepled, fingertips pressed together and he touched his forehead to them. His back shook. The sight drew the breath out of her and Victoria pulled the cardigan closer. Liam didn’t say anything for a time and Victoria started to wonder if she shouldn’t have said anything. Her concern for him waged war with her defiance of speaking the truth. “Should I go?” she asked after a moment.

Liam looked up and she could see tears glistening on his face. “No, please don’t. Not yet.”

Victoria slowly walked over to him and eased down next to him on the bed. She left a good foot of space between them, but Liam looked grateful to her for staying.

“I didn’t mean to upset you,” she said mutely.

“You didn’t,” Liam said hurriedly. “You haven’t done anything wrong and that’s the point. You did everything right and I messed up and you got hurt. You’re right to be angry with me. I let you down.” He took a few ragged breaths and seemed to be building up to something. “I need to tell you about my mother.” He said in a choked voice. Victoria frowned but kept quiet. This was clearly a tough subject. “I told you she died when I was ten, which is true, but I didn’t tell you how she died.”

 _Join the club_ , Victoria thought darkly. She had no intentions of telling him how her parents died.

Liam looked down when he spoke and the words came out of a strangled voice: “She was poisoned.”

“I’m sorry.” She automatically reached for him, but stopped inches from his arm. They both looked down at her outstretched hand. She dropped it onto the bed between them.

“The details of her death were kept secret from the public. Only a small handful of people know.” Liam went on. “If something happened to, if I lost you…”

“You pushed me away to protect me.” Victoria summarised neatly with a voice devoid of emotion. He nodded.

“I’ll regret my actions for the rest of my life because they hurt you, but in that moment it was all I could think of to keep you safe.” Liam finished with the same dull voice.

The truth of that night and of Liam's motivations sat heavily between them. Victoria didn’t move her hand from the halfway point on the bed. “What a mess,” she said.

“Yeah.” Liam agreed.

“Thank you for telling me all that,” Victoria said after a pause. “I’m trying to clear my name. That’s why I’m here. It’s not to torture you or make your life hard, I promise. I won’t get in your way.”

“You aren’t in the way; I love you,” Liam said suddenly, turning around on the bed.

Victoria winced. “Don’t do that,” she said. “Please. You’re engaged.”

“I know,” Liam said, his eyes roaming her face. “I know.” He set his hand down beside her on the bed. He was apparently sticking to his resolve when it came to not touching her. Victoria swallowed. Her own resolve was started to shake. She wanted nothing more than to reach for him and hold him and have him hold her in return. The feeling was so strong that she almost gave in, but Liam spoke up instead. “This is probably the worst time to bring this up, but… Madeleine knows how I feel about you. Even now. She just doesn’t care.”

“Wow,” Victoria said flatly. “I guess this is just a business arrangement for her.”

“Yes, exactly.” Liam nodded. “She even went so far as to tell me that she’s fine with us finding time together. To be together in private.”

Victoria was all warmed up by now, but suddenly a sick chill doused her. “What do you mean?”

Liam looked up at her, his eyes dark with desire. “I knew she wouldn’t be hurt by my picking her without any love for her. That’s partly why I chose her in that moment. But it does mean that we can be together, in a way.”

Victoria pulled her hand away from his, stood up from the bed, backed away. “What are you talking about? You think we can just pick up where we left off?” She hit something. Liam got up and walked towards her carefully, as if she were a frightened animal in a corner. “You want me to be what? Your mistress? You think _I_ want that?”

“No, Victoria, I’m sorry,” Liam said flustered. “I didn’t mean that, I swear.” His face was full of regret again.

“Wow, it’s really all worked out for you, hasn’t it?” she spat out cruelly. “You get a respectable Cordonian queen and the trashy American on the side. That’s what one paper called me, did you see? Thought your country was more progressive than that, but I guess not.” She crossed the wall, towards the door, before remembering it was locked. “Open this door please.”

She moved away as Liam grabbed the key hanging on a hook on the wall and slid it into the lock. He turned back to her. “Victoria please, I don’t know what I was thinking. I’ve missed you so much and I just forgot myself.”

“Move,” Victoria said flatly. He gave her one last rueful look, but Liam stepped aside. Victoria twisted the key and then stormed out of his room, not caring who saw. They all thought they knew her so what did it matter? She’d been judged and found wanting, so what was the point of giving a shit at this point? It wasn’t until she got back to her room that she realised she’d stolen his cardigan. She tore it off and flung it across the room. The bouquet of luxurious red roses were still waiting in her room, but she wrenched the window open and threw the whole thing out, vase, water, flowers and all. Screw him and his apology flowers. His regret flowers. His flowers for the other woman. 

Screw him for making _her_ the other woman.

Victoria slammed the window shut again and dove into bed, crying herself to sleep yet again.

*

The next morning Victoria sat up groggily. She couldn’t realise what had woken her at first until the second knock came at the door. She dragged herself out of bed and over to the door, expecting Maxwell. It wasn’t Maxwell.

“Hana,” Victoria gasped at the sight of her friend.

“Hi Victoria,” Hana smiled back, tiredly. Victoria just grabbed her, pulling her into the room and into her arms. “I missed you, too,” Hana said, her voice muffled against Victoria's shoulder.

“I didn’t think you were coming back,” Victoria said. She was so pleased to see a friendly face again. She let her go and closed the door. “Do your parents know you’re here? You didn’t run away, did you?”

Hana laughed. “No, I’m here with their blessing. My father received a call from Countess Madeleine officially inviting me to stay in Cordonia as part of her entourage.”

“Wow,” Victoria said, but she felt her guards go up. She was too raw from the hurt feelings of last night to think of anything other than Madeleine pulling everything and everyone away from Victoria. But Hana wouldn’t betray her, would she? They weren’t just allies, they were friends. _Like Liam loves you?_ her mind offered unkindly. She blinked a few times. “That’s great, Hana.”

“She promised that the court would find me a match worthy of my family name.” Hana went on. “My mother was over the moon. I think she’s managed to accept that I was never really in the running for Liam's hand, but there are still plenty of Counts and Dukes my age still seeking a wife.”

Victoria formed her face into a smile. “That’s really great, Hana. I’m really pleased for you. That was very thoughtful of Madeleine.”

Hana peered into her face, her deep brown eyes shrewd. “Victoria, I didn’t come back for any of that. My parents let me because of those reasons, but I came back for _you_.” She paused to let it sink in. “I got here this morning, I’ve come straight from the plane. I knew the plan was to get you back to court, but until I knew you were here I delayed my return.”

Victoria reacted first to the tender words of her friend; she truly was on her side, no matter what Madeleine could offer. Hana was her friend, her greatest friend and that meant everything. Then as her smile grew she realised that Hana had referred to a plan. “The plan? Were you in communication with Maxwell and Bertrand?” she asked. “They didn’t say anything to me.”

“No,” Hana shook her head. “This was the night of the Ball.” Hana narrowed her gaze. “Victoria, didn’t you know?”

Victoria dropped onto her bed. “I was at the airport. The Beaumonts came and got me just before I boarded my flight out of Cordonia. I saw Liam for the first time last night. Haven’t seen Drake at all.”

“Liam told us not to contact you,” Hana admitted, looking sorrowful. She went to sit beside Victoria and put her arm around her waist. “He was so worried about you being in danger. It must have felt like we all abandoned you.”

Victoria nodded. “Yeah, it kind of did. Bertrand told me not to reach out to anyone, either. Said anything written down in letter or text or anything could be intercepted. I thought for sure that wouldn’t last, but it did.” Victoria said. “I’m sorry, I’m being such a downer. I’m really pleased you’re here now.”

“You’re allowed to be sad, Victoria,” Hana said, leaning into her. “What happened to you was rotten, but we should have all considered how alone you’d feel. I wish I’d sent something just to let you know that you were in all our thoughts the whole time.”

“It’s alright,” Victoria said. She was surprised to find that she was leaning back against Hana. It was the most comforting embrace she had had in a long time, but she felt bad about relying on Hana to make her feel better. Although it pained her to admit it, they had all probably done the right thing and she was probably better for it, despite how hurt she’d felt.

“We’re all here, now,” Hana said assertively. “And together we can fix this mess. Clear your name. I want to help any way I can.”

“Almost all,” Victoria said. “I haven’t seen Drake yet and there’s no guarantee he’ll be on my side.”

“I suspect he will be,” Hana said with confidence. “He chased after your car that night and then he was the one calling for a plan. Liam was too angry to focus and I was equally useless.”

A second knock on the door prevented Victoria from replying, which was just as well as she was rather dumbstruck by that revelation. She got up and opened the door to let Maxwell in.

“Rise and—” Maxwell stopped as he saw Hana rising from the bed. “Hana!” Within seconds he had bounded across the room and bundled Hana into a hug.

“Oof, hi Maxwell,” Hana said laughing.

Victoria couldn’t help but smile at the sight. She let them hug and greet each other in their own space, still feeling like a black cloud over the joyous reunion. Her eyes drifted to the floor where Liam's cardigan had landed last night. One arm was bent, the other seemed to be stretching towards where she stood now. Her heart lurched and she leapt for the knitwear, grabbing it and turning away from Hana and Maxwell. The scent of Liam invaded her nostrils. Without thinking about it, she marched from the room, her friends calling her name in confusion.

Barefoot once again she carried the cardigan along to Liam's room and rapped sharply on the door. Victoria wasn’t quite sure what the hell she was doing or what she intended to say and she was just starting to hope he wouldn’t be there when the door opened.

“Victoria?” Liam said, a question in his voice and confusion in his eyes. Victoria hesitated only a moment.

“Here,” she said holding out the cardigan. “I didn’t mean to take this.”

Liam reached out and took it back. “I… thank you.”

“Yeah,” she replied. Her hands felt very empty suddenly. “I’m sorry. For yelling at you. I know you were only doing what you thought was best and I guess thanks, for thinking about my safety.”

Liam hadn’t opened the door any wider and still looked shell shocked to see her there. “Victoria, you don’t have to be sorry.”

“Well, I am,” she responded. “I’ll… see you around. Your Majesty.”

She turned and headed back to her room to get ready, not quite sure if she’d accomplished anything with that beyond making herself look unhinged. If she’d kept hold of that damn cardigan she would have never given it back, that much she knew. She couldn’t sentence herself to nights of clinging to the woollen item, smelling his scent and crying. She couldn’t do that; there was no more time for tears. It was time to be strong.

*

Hana proved invaluable in choosing the right outfit for the afternoon. She selected a simple dress of light pink with lace laid over the top. Victoria tied her hair into a low ponytail and slipped on some low heels. It was all about fitting in today, no more standing out like last night. This was less armour and more a white flag. She needed to be as non-threatening to Madeleine as possible, although it seemed laughable given that Madeleine knew and didn’t care about the strength of the feelings Liam had for Victoria. She kept that quiet though and let herself be dressed.

Down on the grounds, the sky was bright blue and clear. Victoria felt braver for being flanked by Maxwell and Hana. She zeroed in on Madeleine and Liam at once, who were standing with Constantine and Regina, the so-called King Father and Queen Mother now. Madeleine caught her eye and scowled at her. Victoria just ignored it.

“Excuse me everyone,” Madeleine's voice rang out as she raised her drink. “I’d like to propose a toast.” Everyone settled their conversations and turned to listen. Victoria and her friends took drinks when offered so they could participate. Victoria watched intently to see what she would say. “First, to each and every one of you for celebrating our engagement. Second, to our King Father Constantine and our Queen Mother, Regina, and my mother for their support.” A few calls of “hear, hear” floated from the assorted nobles. Madeline wasn’t quite finished. “And lastly, to you, my darling. I wouldn’t want anyone else by my side.”

Liam smiled a blank smile and finished his drink without speaking. Madeleine’s brows twitched and she shot a glance to Victoria. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to have done wrong. Madeleine turned back to Liam and dropped a kiss on his cheek.

“Oh honey,” Adelaide said with a chuckle. “Pecks on the cheek are sweet, but he’s your fiancé now. Kiss him like you mean it!”

“Mother!” Madeleine chastised sharply as Liam took a reflexive step backwards.

“That’s quite alright.” He spluttered.

Now there was no mistaking the glare Madeleine threw in Victoria's direction.

Constantine laughed jovially. “Adelaide, I don’t think that’s quite the support Madeleine was toasting. To Cordonia!” The nobles chuckled and raised their glasses.

Madeleine excused herself from the conversation that had begun between the trio of parents and headed over to Victoria and Hana. Maxwell had made himself scarce.

“Hello Lady Hana,” she said when she reached them.

“It’s an honour to be here.” Hana curtsied. “Thank you for the invitation back to court.”

“And with Lady Victoria here as well, I hope you’ve enjoyed seeing a familiar face,” Madeleine said, fixing Victoria with an acid smile.

“It’s certainly nice to see Hana again,” Victoria said honestly. Madeleine sipped her drink.

“You know,” she said smugly. “If it weren’t for me, she’d still be on the other side of the world.”

Victoria shared a glance with Hana. Surely she wasn’t claiming she had acted in Victorias best interests or committed a selfless act of kindness?

“I hope you’ll remember that dear Hana is here by my personal invitation,” Madeleine said pointedly.

“Well, I’m pleased to have her here,” Victoria said cautiously. Madeleine huffed.

“Good God, woman, are you really that simple?” she snapped quietly. “I’m just asking for a little politeness here.”

“Thank you, Madeleine.” Victoria choked out through gritted teeth, but Madeleine seemed mollified at least.

“Was that really so hard?” Madeleine asked.

Hana looked over Madeleine's shoulder and dipped into a curtsy. “King Liam.”

Victoria and Madeleine turned as Liam approached. He offered Hana a warm smile. “Lady Hana, I’m so elated you’ve returned.”

“I’m very happy to be back,” Hana replied. Liam turned his sights on Victoria and the smile slid off his face, replaced by a look of longing.

“Lady Victoria,” he said quietly. “You look beautiful.”

“Hello, Your Majesty,” Victoria replied just as sombrely.

Madeleines jaw clenched. “Darling, I believe a new delegation of visitors have just arrived. Why don’t you go and greet them?”

“Of course,” Liam replied flatly. “It was a pleasure to see you both.” He nodded at them and headed off.

Madeleine rounded on Victoria. “Walk with me Victoria. Lady Hana, do excuse us.”

Victoria shot a nervous look to Hana who offered an encouraging smile as she followed Madeleine off the grounds and back inside the house. Victoria wasn’t sure, but it seemed very much like she’d done something heinously wrong. After a while the reached a private spot away from nobles and servants alike. Madeleine turned to Victoria.

“Right, what on earth was that?” she asked. Victoria frowned. “Out there?”

“What are you talking about?” Victoria asked, genuinely confused.

“Oh, my goodness, it’s like speaking to a child.” Madeleine pinched the space between her eyes. “I gather there is some awkwardness between you and my fiancé?”

“You mean besides the fact that he’s your fiancé?” Victoria asked. “You could say so, yeah.”

“Well, get over it,” Madeleine said bluntly. “Liam cannot be seen to be so miserable. He’s on his engagement tour and he’s supposed to be enjoying himself.”

“It’s not my fault he’s unhappy,” Victoria said. “Isn’t his happiness your job now?”

Madeleine sighed. “Do you know why you’re here Victoria?”

 _To clear my name._ “I’m here with the Beaumonts.”

“No, in my court,” Madeleine said. “Did that boy not explain? Honestly, he might be a Lord, but Maxwell Beaumont is just the worst waste of space. Let me be frank with you because apparently subtly is beyond you. You are in my court as a means to keep Liam happy. However you see fit, as long as you are discreet.”

The words of Liam from last night floated back into her ears and mingled with these from Madeleine. Victoria felt that cold ill-feeling again. “What, like, a concubine?” She tried to give a breezy laugh but it sounded more hysteric than she’d intended.

“I am well aware of the feelings you have for each other,” Madeleine went on smoothly. “You can call yourself whatever you want to make you happy, but you must never forget that we are all here to serve the King and the Crown however best we can.” She looked Victoria square in the eye. “This is the best offer you could have ever hoped for. I suggest you take it.”

With those final words, she turned and marched back out. Victoria stood silent and still, her insides like ice. She needed her friends. That was the thought that shot through her confusion and horror. She turned to head back outside.

Within moments of the sunlight hitting her, she bumped into someone coming inside. Victoria mumbled a sorry, but then looked up into the face of Drake Walker. Her heart soared to see him and she wrapped her arms around him. “Drake.”

Hana had found Maxwell and they were catching up to Drake and Victoria.

Drake waited until she was done and then fixed her with a face that was cold and hard. He hadn’t hugged her back. Victoria’s heart sank. “Drake?”

“Who’s Riley Brooks?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter song is by the inimitable Joni Mitchell and is probably my favourite of all her songs, A Case of You. 
> 
> Oof, a heavy chapter. I know the game is quite light and breezes over what happens at the Ball and the MC and Prince can pretty much pick things up for book 2, but not my Victoria. She is hurt and she's mad and rightly so! 
> 
> Oh yeah, and Drakes back and he's done some sleuthing!


	4. The Sound of Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Who is Riley Brooks?"

_Hello darkness, my old friend_

Victoria could feel the world tilt on its axis at that moment. The ground dipped as though she were on a boat going over a wave and yet she did not stumble. That name cut through her brain, bringing with it flashes of memories, many of them awful. Where on earth did he find that? Her mind was spiralling and through it, all came her one demand: _deny everything._

The usually warm brown eyes of Drake Walker were devoid of anything other than suspicion. He wasn’t her friend right now. Maybe never again.

Victoria's heart was in her stomach and her mind was whirring, but she matched his hard expression perfectly. When she spoke it was with clarity and an unwavering voice. “I don’t know who you are talking about.”

Maxwell and Hana had reached them now, both walking into this frozen atmosphere and looking from Drake to Victoria and back again.

Drake didn’t move. “OK, next question. What did you think the news was breaking the night of the ball?”

“I didn’t have any idea,” she replied.

“Drake?” Maxwell asked hesitantly, but he ignored Maxwell.

“Bullshit.” Drake barked. “I saw your face when you saw the headline: you were _relieved_. There was something worse that you were expecting. What was it?”

Victoria's lip twitched, just for a millisecond and he spotted it at once.

“What was it, _Victoria_?” She didn’t like the way he was saying her name. The venom he was pouring into it. “Who’s Riley Brooks?” He asked again. “What are you so afraid of us finding out?”

“Drake, come on now,” Maxwell said, stepping into the role of mediator.

Victoria turned and walked away, around the side of the house. Drake immediately followed, with Maxwell and Hana trailing behind, confused.

“Come on Quinn, tell us something.” Drake called mockingly. “Who’s Riley Brooks and why are you so afraid of her? What was more scary than the real news story from that night?” When she didn’t stop he threw out his most pointed barb. “Where’d you get the bullet from?”

Victoria stopped, turning around to face him. “Just leave me alone, Drake.” she snarled. Drake didn’t stop when she did, he closed the gap between them coming right up to her face.

“I want some answers,” he snapped back. “Because I did some searching and there was a girl called Riley Brooks who went to a school in California who seemed to be about your age—”

She felt fear grip her heart. “Please, Drake, don’t—”

“—but she died.” Drake said. “In a fire.”

Victoria looked away. Hana caught up with her and went straight to her side. When she spoke, it was with a sharper tongue than Victoria would have guessed Hana possessed. “Drake, whatever this is, stop it.”

“Come on Drake,” Maxwell gripped his arm, but Drake wrenched it loose, pointing his finger in Victorias face.

“I just want to hear something true from you for once,” he said in a low growl. “What are you hiding from us all?”

Victoria looked up into his accusing face. She couldn’t think straight, not with the memories of the fire flaring across her brain. She could hear screaming, falling wood. Gunshots. Shouting. Demands. Enemies. Her back felt hot. “Drake…please…not now.”

“Yes now.” Drake retorted. “Before you can charm everyone into forgetting how full of lies you are. What happened to Riley Brooks and how did you get your scars?”

“Drake is now really the time?” Hana asked. Victoria realised that she was leaning against Hana again.

“I need to know.” Drake said.

“Why?” Victoria asked, her voice a hollow whine. “What difference does it make? You were right, OK?” She pushed herself upright and now she was the one moving in on Drake. Her eyes were streaming angry tears and her voice was ragged, but she was damn well going to stand on her own two feet. “You were right. I was crushed, just like Savannah.” She saw him flinch at his sisters name and she felt glad. Screw him. “Only she was smarter than me because she stayed away from this cesspit. I came back to get crushed over and over.” She shrugged, an over exaggerated gesture of giving up. “There’ll be nothing left of me by the end of the year. And you knew, you knew what would happen and I didn’t listen so I’m a fool. You were right, does that make you happy to hear me say it?”

Drake was breathing hard, but refused to break eye contact. “Answer the question, Quinn.”

“How did you even find that name?” She asked instead.

Drake snorted. “The book you loaned me. Nestled inside the pages was a scrap of paper.”

“What?” She asked, genuinely confused.

“A piece of paper with the name Riley Brooks. Headed paper from Alameda High School.” Drake listed bluntly. “And a teachers name and number.”

“…for emergencies.” Victoria recited softly as the paper floated into her minds eye. She remembered so clearly when Ms Krasinski had torn off that sheet from her pad and written those words. She was the teacher who had given her that copy of The Princess Bride, amongst a few other novels. She’d tried to encourage Victoria to call if there were any problems at home after her ankle had broken and she’d dropped off the soccer team. Ms Krasinski was the only teacher brave enough to try with her. The only one who saw anything worth saving in her.

Why the hell hadn’t she flicked through the damn book before loaning it to Drake? She remembered the paper now, but she hadn’t read the book in years. _Stupid, stupid, stupid…_ She’d thrown breadcrumbs out to him, scattered them wildly. In fact, she’d practically taken out a neon sign pointing to her secrets. She was a fool.

“The fire that killed Riley Brooks,” Drake was saying. “Happened in a clubhouse known for it’s criminal associates. It was quite the news story; put to end a criminal gang. hey believed it was arson. Did someone kill Riley?”

Victoria felt the colour drain from her face as she raised it to meet Drakes eye again. “Yes. I killed her.”

Hana gasped at the news, but Victoria waited a beat to let that hit then continued. “Riley Brooks was me. I killed her when I left California.” She was exhausted now, bone tired from revealing the truth for the first time in almost thirteen years. Under duress, when she was already beaten down. “Happy now?”

She stumbled out of Hanas arms and without really seeing she headed away from the group who watched her go. She heard Maxwell start to shout, but it wasn’t at her she realised. It was at Drake. He was laying into him for his aggressive questioning and terrible timing. The sound warmed her cold heart a little, but she was so deep inside herself that she couldn’t fully feel it.

She walked passed the nobles who were chatting so nicely together. Maybe some of them watched her, but Victoria had no idea. She just put one foot in front of the other and walked into the manor and up the stairs. A maid asked if she was alright but by the time the words permeated she was long passed her. She reached her room and after a few attempts got the key in the lock, turning it with numb fingers and entered the room. She kicked it shut and walked through the room. She stumbled out of her shoes, leaving them behind, then pulled off the pretty pink dress, discarding it behind her. She found herself at the window staring out over the view. It wasn’t as nice as the one from Liams balcony. She felt her head turn towards the direction of his room.

That was who she wanted. She wanted to curl up in the arms of the man who felt like her home. He never would be her home, but maybe she could pretend. Just for this dark moment in time when the black cloud threatened to swallow her. Victoria turned to find some clothes and dressed in the same loose yoga pants and t-shirt that she’d slept in and opened the window.

“Wait!” She turned slowly, moving as if through treacle. Her eyes took a moment to focus. The door was open and Drake was in the doorway. “Victoria, don’t. I’m sorry.”

Victoria glanced back at the window. He didn’t think…?

“I was going to Liams balcony.” she said dumbly. “I wasn’t going to jump.”

There was relief etched all over his face and she felt rage reignite. “I’m not suicidal, you asshole. Don’t give yourself that much credit.” Victorias hand itched to grab something to throw at him as the anger burned away her dulled feelings. “I feel like shit but I’m not going to kill myself at Madeleines stupid fancy estate.” She laughed darkly. “Though that would be funny, leaving her to tidy up after me. She’d probably bring out dogs to eat me.”

“Quinn, look,” Drake stepped into the room and crossed it quickly, pulling the window shut as if he didn’t trust her. “I didn’t mean to…”

“What? Upset me?” Victoria retorted tartly. “Of course you did.”

“I guess I did,” Drake ran a hand over his face. “I don’t know why. I was mad. I was lashing out.”

“You took the time to Google me.” Victoria said. “That isn’t lashing out. That’s premeditated. Like the murder I guess you’d decided I committed.”

“I didn’t—” Drake sighed. At this close proxemity Victoria could see how tired he looked. He sank down against the windowsill, hands clamped on his knees. “I couldn’t stop them from taking you.” He finally said, utterly defeated. “Bastien dragged you out of the ball and away from the palace and I couldn’t stop them. Then I realised I still had your book, so I started reading it. I found the paper and I didn’t have anything else to do and I felt so useless that I started digging. And then I guess my anger got misplaced. I got angry at you.” He looked up guiltily. “I figured maybe if you’d been honest with me I could have saved you somehow. I’m…I’m so sorry, Victoria.”

Victoria felt the room get a little warmer. “I accept your apology.”

Drake snapped his head around to look at her. “Just like that?”

Victoria shrugged. “I did lie to you. I do have secrets. I don’t relish being outed like that but I have precious few friends. If you’re willing to help me track down Tariq and clear my name and not mention Riley Brooks even again…” she smiled tiredly. “then I guess we’re OK.”

“Victoria Quinn,” Drake said standing. “You are a remarkably forgiving woman. I don’t deserve—”

They turned as the door opened again and Liam entered, followed by Hana, Maxwell and Bertrand. Liam took in the scene in an instant. “Victoria, are you alright?”

Victoria for her part looked back at him and her friends and stifled both a groan and a smile. _This is what you wanted. For people to care about you. This is what that looks like. Annoying, isn’t it?_

“Guys, I’m fine but…” Victoria struggled to make words fit around the lump in her throat. “I… you’re all here.” She broke off laughing. “You all came to see if I was alright. That’s… literally never happened before for me.”

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Liam asked again, darting a look to Drake.

“I will be.” Victoria said. “Drake did some digging about me and he had questions, but I’ll be alright.”

Drake gave a nod with raised brows to Liam, tucking his hands into his pockets. Liam seemed to relax at that sign. Victoria saw something pass between them and wondered at the longevity of their relationship, whether she might have one day reached the stage where she could talk without words with Liam. That familiar pang of what was not to be hit her again.

“Well, good.” he said with obvious relief. “As long as you are well.” Liam was taking this no touching rule to heart and he wasn’t going to pry. He turned to leave and Victorias heart lurched, propelling her to step forward, more afraid of what he might be wondering about her history than she was scared of admitting the truth.

“My real name is Riley Brooks,” Victoria said loud and clear. Everyone stopped and looked at her. Liam turned back. “I changed it when I was eighteen before I got to New York. Before that I spent two years bumming around America trying on different names like hats, but I liked Victoria Quinn best. Riley Brooks died in a fire, or so you’ll see if, like Drake, you look for her.” Victoria was still, but for her mouth and her hands. Her thumbs were counting her fingers in scales up and down in perfect synchronicity. A trick taught to her by a therapist for when her thoughts threatened to overwhelm her. She hadn’t done that in years, but this was big. This was a lot. She had to keep checking herself while she talked. “I can’t tell you all everything, not today. Some of it is too hard, but you all know pieces and so I want to explain my life a little bit today.” Victoria took a deep breath, joy over being cared for at odds with the terror of exposing her past to them all. “You all came for me. Back at the airport I thought I was adrift and I kind of hated all of you, but you didn’t forget me.” She passed her eyes along each person.

Bertrand stood calmly, clearly unused to such open discussion, but still he was there and listening for her sake. Not old enough to be a father figure, he was like an older brother.

Maxwell beside him was as quiet as she’d ever seen him, as still as stone. Apart from his head, which nodded along with her, silently encouraging her. He was there for her, always.

Liam was Liam. The King was outside the door, or back downstairs, in this room it was Liam, the man she had met in New York, but so much more. He was sad, it radiated off him, and worried, and she needed to fix that. More than that, she wanted to fix that. If he was sad, she was sad; it was that simple.

Hana was standing on his other side, her sister, her best friend. She’d come back for her from halfway around the world. Her eyes were the warmest thing she ever seen and it was easy to talk to those eyes.

And Drake, the source of this, the man who’d pulled the plug and unleashed a torrent of desperation and past trauma he probably could never have foreseen. Despite his aggression at drawing the truth out of her, she couldn’t question his devotion to her cause. She had no doubt that if she fell, he would catch her, if she jumped, he would jump right after her.

“I never meant to lie to you all, but I also never meant to find any of you.” Victoria went on. “I lived a small, lonely life back in New York because I didn’t want to trust anyone. My family were deadly. No-one messed with…with Jimmy Brooks.” His spectre materialised into view behind them all, glaring at her. “He was a piece of shit. He died in prison when I was sixteen. It all happened when I was sixteen. My mom died.” She looked down. “My mom was murdered.” Victoria couldn’t quite meet Liams eyes now. Would he hate her for keeping that particularly piece of her past back when he had spoken of his mothers murder the night before? “God, this is harder than I thought.” She turned away, breaking the spell of silence and her fingers threaded through her messy black curls. Hana was the one to touch her, to bring her back and ground her. She placed a soothing palm on her back.

“It’s OK Victoria,” she said. “You don’t have to tell us anything.”

Maxwell was next, his voice beside her, his hand slipping around her waist. “Yeah, it’s fine. Or not. You tell us.”

The other men kept a distance for their own reasons. Victoria didn’t blame them. She turned back with Hana and Maxwell now surrounding her, avoiding everyone’s eyes.

“My dad had my mom murdered.” She said shakily. “So, I destroyed everything he built and Riley along with it. That was the only way I knew I’d be safe. That’s what I was afraid of.” Victoria said directly to Drake. “That’s my biggest, scariest skeleton and I was so afraid that the press knew somehow, but how could they? You only knew because I left a door open for you, like an idiot.”

Drake gave her a small smile. “No-one outside of this room needs to know. Right?”

There was a chorus of agreement. Liam had been listening without speaking and now he sat down on the edge of her bed, thinking. Victoria watched him with a small ball of dread growing inside her.

“Victoria, I am so sorry for everything you’ve been through.” He said hoarsely, as unable to look at her as she had been with him a moment ago. The last time she’d opened up he’d held her and watched over her while she slept and now he wasn’t even touching her. That felt so wrong, but he was doing as she’d asked. “You’ve impressed us all with your bravery and now you’re being brave again. I don’t know what anyone of us did to deserve you.” He was speaking for the group, Victoria noted. Not himself. “What can we do to make it easier for you?”

Victoria let out a breath. She hadn’t realised how tense she’d been. “Honestly? Don’t keep me out of the loop. Don’t make plans about me that don’t include me. I can’t tell you all how terrifying it was to be alone again after the ball. I understand secrecy, boy do I understand it, and I know what it feels like to be threatened. But find a way to let me know. Please?”

“Absolutely.” Liam said. “From now on we keep a channel of communication open, agreed?” There were nods and murmurs of assent. “I regret that I will be unable to be visibly helpful, but whatever you need from me I will do my utmost to provide. Bertrand?”

“Understood, Your Majesty.” Came the reply. Then to Victoria Bertrand said: “We are all committed to clearing your name. Please never doubt that.”

“Thank you. All of you.” Victoria said feeling herself relax properly since she’d come back from the airport.

“The next stop is Applewood Manor,” Bertrand went on. “We should act swiftly there to gather intelligence. It’s in all of our interests to put this matter to bed as soon as possible.” He glanced at Liam who nodded. “Victoria, I can have a car outside in thirty minutes if you wanted to get going early?”

Victoria looked around at her friends. “Split the party already?” She asked, not liking the idea, but seeing the merit of an early start. “Sure. I’m practically already packed. Apart from my book, Drake did you finish it?”

“Er…not quite.” Drake said with a shrug. “Sorry Quinn.”

“That’s OK. Bring it with you.” Victoria said.

The group started to disperse with Bertrand heading out to sort the car. Hana and Maxwell were both reluctant to leave Victorias side, so she bade goodnight to Drake and Liam. Liam hesitated before going, but didn’t say anything. He was still not OK, she realised and although she was a mess herself she needed to speak to him and clear the air between them. She’d have to suck up her sorrows and bitterness and try to resolve things with him.

*

Fydelia was not close to Applewood and as they drove the afternoon bled into night. Victoria felt glad to put some space between herself and her revelations. She had expected to feel worse after talking about Riley, but she just felt relieved. That everyone had accepted her words without complaint or judgement was not just helpful. It was everything.

As they travelled Bertrand explained that he’d checked and the staff were the same as they had been earlier in the year so they were definitely worth speaking to if possible. Victoria remembered how much time she had spent with them, picking apples and baking pies. She was sure they would talk to her.

When they arrived they were greeted by the housekeeper, who welcomed them warmly and assigned a maid to Victoria to carry her trunk. The woman flushed and avoided her gaze as she took the trunk and started to pull it along. Victoria followed. The maid, a young woman with carrot-bright hair, didn’t seem very open to talking. She reached the stairs and hesitated. Victoria stepped forward. “Let me help,” she said kindly. Without waiting for agreement Victoria took up one of the handles. The maid looked extremely grateful as she took her handle and between them they lifted the trunk and carried it up the stairs. They reached the top and the maid shyly looked back at Victoria. “Thank you. Not many would help a maid out like this.”

Victoria smiled. “I’m just me. I’m not like most people here I guess.”

They continued to carry it along the corridor, the Beaumont boys having been lead the other way. It was just the two women now.

“How has your day been?” Victoria asked. She was itching to ask about the night a few months ago, but she didn’t dare scare the maid off by diving in too quickly.

“My day?” she asked, surprised. “Well, it’s been a bit hectic I guess. We had some downtime after hosting the court here back in August, but it’s all picking up again for the Engagement Tour.” She cast a glance to Victoria as she said the last part. “The worst has passed though.”

“I used to work in hospitality.” Victoria said. “I know it’s probably not the same, but I’ve worked in hotels back in America. Some nicer than others. I know what you mean about the stress of functions and VIPs.” The maid smiled warmly. “What’s your name?”

“Mary,” she replied.

“Nice to meet you, Mary.” Victoria said genuinely. “You have anything interesting to look forward to later? Once us irritating early guests have been settled in?” Mary looked askance for a moment. “I’m kidding, don’t worry.”

Mary relaxed again, but it was clear that she was putting on a polite veneer for the nobility. She was even nervous in front of Victoria. “My co-workers birthday is today. We’re having a small celebration this evening.”

“Ooh, with cake?”

Mary smiled, less guarded now. “The question isn’t will there be cake, but will there be enough for thirds?”

“That’s the right attitude to cake!” Victoria chuckled and Mary giggled along. They reached Victorias room and as they stepped through she noted with some dread that this was the same room as she’d had last time. They set the trunk down and Victoria straightened, shuddering slightly as she took in the vast window. Mary followed her gaze.

“My Lady,” she said with a curtsy. Victoria started and turned.

“Oh sorry Mary,” she said. “My mind just went somewhere else momentarily.” Victoria grabbed her purse and pulled out a couple of bank notes to give to Mary, who’s eyes went wide at the generosity. “I told you I worked hotels. I know the joy of getting a decent tip.” Victoria explained with a smile.

Mary pocketed it gladly. “You know,” she said thoughtfully. “You’re a lot nicer than the papers said you were. Then again my aunt kept saying the news had it all wrong and that you were a sweet girl. She works down in the kitchen.” she explained seeing Victorias surprised look. “You guys made pies? Yeah she said it was dreadful what happened to you in the papers. You didn’t deserve to get pranked like that. Not with how it blew up.”

Victorias ears pricked up, but she forced herself to play cool. “Pranked?”

“Yeah, you know…” Mary said, shifting and looking away. “That night. The prank?”

“It wasn’t much of a prank,” Victoria said slowly. “It was…something else.”

Mary looked up, suddenly seeming close to tears. Victoria frowned. “I… didn’t know.” Mary confessed. “I helped set it up. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s alright,” Victoria said cautiously even though it really wasn’t. “But can you please tell me what happened?”

For a long moment she didn’t think Mary would go on, but she seemed to decide in favour of Victorias request. “That night one of the noble ladies came to me. She wanted to play a prank on her friends, but she said it was in your best interests.” Mary detailed. “She said two of her friends were desperately in love, but shy and needed nudging together. I delivered a love letter to Lord Tariq saying it was on your behalf and I told him your room assignment had changed to his.”

“Which is why he came to my room thinking it was his,” Victoria pieced together. “And why he thought I was into him after I barely spoke to him. Such a simple scheme.” She shook her head at how such a small event had snowballed. “Kind of a weird request, though?”

“It’s not…I’ve had weirder.” Mary said. “I thought it was just a silly game until the scandal broke and I realised how wrong I was.”

“It’s OK,” Victoria said. She couldn’t hold this against the maid who was doing what she thought was right. No doubt this was expected of her, to keep the bored nobles happy. “It wasn’t your fault. Who was the lady?”

Mary winced. “I didn’t see… it was press day so she was wearing sunglasses and a hat and scarf. Again, it seemed perfectly normal.”

“That’s a shame,” Victoria admitted. “I was really hoping you’d know the exact person I needed to see. But still, you’ve been really helpful.”

“I just wanted to make up for helping to hurt you,” Mary said. “I’ve felt so guilty since the news broke.”

Victoria shrugged. “You didn’t take pictures of me without my knowledge and publish them without my consent. I think you should go easier on yourself.”

Mary seemed appeased by this. “Thank you, Lady Victoria. For what it’s worth I’m really sorry for my part in hurting you.”

When she left Victoria closed the heavy curtains over the window and, after trying the lock and finding it still broken, she wedged a chair under the door handle. Even knowing Tariq was far away and that the Manor was empty of nobles this night didn’t mean she would sleep any easier. Who was that mystery noble woman? Madeleine? Victoria climbed into bed and spent an uneasy evening tossing and turning before sleep claimed her.

She dreamed of Riley Brooks rising up from the grave to haunt her and no matter how far or fast she ran, she couldn’t escape her past. More than once she woke up from a cold sweat despite the raging inferno of her nightmares.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Sound of Silence that I used for the title of this chapter is by Simon and Garfunkel and covered excellently by Disturbed so pick your favourite! 
> 
> I thought a long time about whether to reveal that Victoria was born Riley Brooks at this point or hold it back, but when I knew the book would play a part I figured it had to be soon. Drake is like a dog with a bone when there is a mystery and he's always had suspicions about Victoria. He wouldn't wait. 
> 
> (I had a hiccup with my editing software, so if you find any silly typos or apostrophes please do let me know. I did scan this several times, but you know sometimes you can become blind to faults! Thanks!)


	5. Bury It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria shares her findings and builds a barn for the happy couple...

_I never promised you anything I couldn’t do_

“This certainly proves what we already knew: that you were set up,” Bertrand said thoughtfully, scratching his fingers across his chin. It was the next morning and Victoria had recounted her conversation with Mary for them. “It’s a very good start.”

“Yeah, but it’s not enough, is it?” Victoria sighed. “Not by a long shot.”

“I’m afraid you’re right there.” Bertrand agreed. “We have to be able to prove that you didn’t send this letter beyond a shadow of a doubt.”

Maxwell, who was struggling with the heavy curtains, turned around. “We do have a witness now, though.”

“Yes, one. Though an argument could be made that she is not wholly reliable.” Bertrand said sitting back in his chair. “And we don’t have the letter anyway, so it could all be lies.”

“But it’s not.”

“No, Maxwell, but we have to think like the other side here,” Bertrand said with more patience than Victoria would have expected. “With this story, it could be argued that we paid her fabricate a lie and without Tariq or the letter to back it up…? It’s not enough.”

Victoria sighed quietly. She hadn’t slept particularly well in this room. She was tempted to ask for a change, but couldn’t bring herself to ask this of anyone.

Maxwell looked dejected for only a moment with this information then brightened. “Hey, this is still a start and we’ve ruled out half the court just by knowing it was a noble lady.” He went to sit on the bed beside Victoria. “Great job on talking to the maid and getting her side of the story. I would never have been able to do that.”

“Yes, you would,” Victoria said with a tired smile. “Besides there isn’t a trick to it; you just have to talk to the staff like people. Pretty simple really.”

Bertrand was still lost in thought over on his chair. The chair that Victoria had used last night to keep the door shut. She suppressed a shudder. “What’s on the agenda today then Bertrand?”

He snapped out of his reverie. “Oh, er, yes.” He cleared his throat. “Today we start with an important Cordonian tradition where, as a community, we build a barn.”

“That sounds pretty quaint,” Victoria said. She realised Maxwell was busying himself with his fingernails suddenly. “OK. What’s the catch.”

“No catch,” Maxwell mumbled.

Bertrand sighed. “The barn is a symbol of the future the bride and groom are building together.”

Victoria let out a groan. “Urgh, of course. Well, I hope no-one forgets to secure the load wall and the whole thing comes tumbling down after a week. That’d be tragic.”

*

At least Victoria had clothes ready to go for working on barn building. She pulled on her cut off denim shorts, a blue T-shirt that read Made In The 80s in a rounded font and a red plaid shirt over the top which she tied at the waist. The only thing she was missing was work boots, but she pulled on her beat-up sneakers instead. Maxwell came to find her and bring her outside, promising there were cute hard hats on site. Victoria was just countering with a hope that the hats would be functional over pretty, when they stepped outside the Manor. A riot of noise and flashes greeted them, combining with the bright sunshine of the morning sun to blind Victoria momentarily. Maxwell hesitated, but grabbed her hand tightly, his grip soothing amid the chaos. “Come on. Keep your head down and don’t stop. I can see the car.”

“I didn’t think the press would be here?” Victoria managed before complying. They headed into the pit of reporters. Microphones were thrust under her chin and even keeping her head down Victoria felt the uncomfortable claustrophobia of the people swarming around her.

“Why are you still at court?” One woman barked at her, almost hitting her in the mouth with her large microphone.

“Sorry!” Maxwell squeaked. “No time for autographs today.”

“Er…no comment…” Victoria spluttered. Her pulse was racing unpleasantly and she could feel the urge to start punching her way out of this throng. She clenched her fist, but kept her arm by her side. She couldn’t lose it here.

Another reporter planting himself in front of them. “Come on, we have a right to know: why did you betray King Liam?”

Victoria stopped. “I…I didn’t—”

“The people want an answer.” He demanded. Victoria shrank away from his aggressive questioning.

“Just…I can’t…” She started to go around the man, but he moved where she stepped. Now she really was getting angry. “Back off!”

Then an arm swam into view; a man in a sharp suit and glasses cleared a path through the reporters. Victoria watched bewildered as he managed to get them to move aside. “Alright, that’s enough now, back off.” He was saying in a clear, smooth voice and it was working. The reporter in front of Victoria held fast. “Lady Victoria will answer all your questions in a statement at the barn raising and you’ll all have to wait.” The man huffed and moved away.

Victoria felt the new figure slide his hand onto her back and apply light pressure. She automatically moved forward. He leaned in close. “Just keep moving, Lady Victoria. No need to feed these vultures just yet.”

Numbly she let herself be lead to the car and then was surprised when this man climbed into the car after her. “Who are you?” she asked.

“I’m your new best friend,” he said with a broad grin as he closed the door behind him.

“Victoria, are you OK?” Maxwell was asking. “That was scary. They weren’t even supposed to be here.”

“No, they weren’t” Victorias new best friend agreed. “Tabloids. Trashy magazines after a cheap story. Amateurs. The decent reporters are all at the barn raising as planned.”

“Bertrand, who is this guy?” Victoria asked, her voice raised to speak over him. Bertrand turned back to her.

“This is your new press secretary,” Bertrand said simply. She waited for him to elaborate but apparently that was all the explanation she was going to get.

“My— what?” The man held out his hand to her.

“The name’s Justin,” Justin said politely. “And it looks like I arrived ‘just-in’ time.”

Victoria shook his hand as Maxwell chortled at the pun. “What?”

“He’s an up-and-coming communications agent in the Cordonian bureaucracy,” Bertrand said.

“That means cheap.”

“Maxwell!”

“Guys!” Victoria threw up her hands. “Everyone shut up a second!” She took a moment to get her breath back and mercifully the men all complied with her request for silence. “OK, first Bertrand. What is our one rule?”

Bertrand hesitated. “Keep communication open with you.”

“Exactly,” Victoria said crossly. “I need to know if you’re hiring a strange man to work on our team, no offence, and thank you for saving me from the hoards of press.”

“None taken and you’re welcome,” Justin said easily.

“That was a really unpleasant situation and I appreciate your help, but I was this close to punching you in the face,” Victoria said holding up her thumb and forefinger only a centimetre apart.

“Thank you for holding back,” Justin said. “I may be tall, but in a fight, I would fold like a piece of paper.”

“I would have felt bad about it,” Victoria admitted. She was warming to this Clark Kent lookalike.

“And for my part, please forgive the intrusion earlier,” Justin said. “The press looked like they were giving you a hard time and I don’t like to see my clients being manhandled.”

“Forget it, it’s fine,” Victoria replied. She was calmer now, able to think straight away from that swell of snapped questions and angry faces. “It won’t always be like that will it? Speaking to the press?”

“No,” Justin said firmly. “That was an anomaly. They shouldn’t have even been there. The press at the barn raising know how to behave though their questions will be along the same vein. The perception of you at the moment is that you harmed our King and so harmed all of Cordonia. People are confused and in that confusion, they found fear and that lead to anger.”

“I get it,” Victoria said. “Fear leads to hate. I’m trying to win over a bunch of Siths.”

Justin, to his credit, chuckled at her reference. “I can see how you charmed the press during the season. That’s good and you should use it. Never stop being the girl they all fell in love with. But you will have to be careful. They are like starving tigers, the press, and they want answers. Your job is to avoid being steered into giving the answers they want to print. Answers that support their narrative.”

“Got it,” Victoria said, though she was still a little unsure. “What does that mean for me exactly?”

“You stay on message.”

“Which is?” Maxwell asked.

“Victoria is a perfect little angel who loves Cordonia,” Justin replied. “I don’t care what they ask you, you keep pivoting to your innocence. They ask you your mothers maiden name? You stay on message. Understood?”

“I am a perfect little angel who loves Cordonia.” Victoria flashed back a smile. Justin laughed.

“Man, this is going to be the easiest job ever.” He said with a grin. He reached into his jacket pocket and handed her a single index card. “Here. A short press statement for you to memorise. Say everything on that card and you won’t have a problem.”

Victoria nodded and read it over. She could do this. Then she could build a brilliant barn and pretend she cared about Liam and Madeleine's future.

*

“I love Cordonia,” Victoria said to the waiting press. “I spent the social season falling in love with this beautiful kingdom. In fact, when faced with the possibility of have to leave, I found that I had begun to think of it as home. I’m very grateful to the Beaumonts for bringing me here and welcoming me into their family. Thank you.”

Justin swept up and quietened the press as they started to throw questions. “That’s all the time we can spare. Lady Victoria has a barn to build after all!”

As they walked away from the press Victoria asked with a low voice. “How was that?”

“You crushed it.” Justin enthused.

The basic skeleton of the barn was already up Victoria noted as they approached. It made sense; they surely didn’t really want a bunch of pampered nobles to erect a building without a lot of help from the professionals. Some of the workers nodded to Victoria as she passed and she smiled back. These people weren’t baying for blood or trying to chase her off with torches and pitchforks.

Standing beside the barn were Liam and Madeleine giving their own interview. Victoria took a deep breath to prepare herself before she passed her gaze over them. They were standing next to each other, close enough to touch, but there was air between them. In her minds eye, she saw herself in Madeleine's place in the future that never was. Standing beside Liam, his arm loosely draped around her because they could do that in public once they were engaged, but they didn’t need to hang off each other. It would be a casual thing though, Liam wouldn’t even think about it. They’d be close. No air between them. Nothing in between them any longer. And they would both be beaming. Oh, how she ached when she thought about it.

Liam in the now was standing tall, but his face looked strained. That wasn’t his King face, that was bordering on austere. It was so unlike him. That sent a pang of sorrow to her heart. The man was hurting, too.

Madeleine was working overtime to cover for this, flushed and smiling too wide. “We’re honoured to be part of this great Cordonian tradition.” She was saying.

“Are you enjoying your engagement tour?” Came the next question. Madeleine wrapped her arm around Liams.

“I couldn’t be happier with my Liam.” she purred.

“Of course,” Liam replied. Victoria sighed. That wouldn’t cut it. She could see Madeleine flounder to cover up for her fiances' lack of enthusiasm and sensed another stern talking to in her future.

“You OK, Victoria?” Maxwell asked quietly.

“Yeah,” Victoria said. “This is probably really hard on Liam. I hope he’s alright.”

They walked over towards the barn. Victoria looked over and caught Liams eye and she threw a smile his way, a real one. She didn’t have to like the situation, but she cared about his happiness. He smiled back, even if it didn’t quite reach his eyes. It was a start.

Justin sent her into the fray promising to subtly direct the press to take the best photos of her. Victoria grinned. She couldn’t help but like this guy. And as she’d said, she had only a small team on her side and she could stand to open up to a few more allies.

Walking around the barn Victoria found Drake hauling a rope to lift a beam along with a few workmen. Drake was shirtless, Victoria couldn’t help but notice. “Hey, Drake.”

He glanced at her and the rope started to slip. “Don’t distract me, Quinn.” He huffed. Victoria stepped over and grabbed the rope with him, adding her strength to the group and helped them pull it up to the workman waiting for it up high. Victoria straightened up.

“I think the phrase you are looking for is thank you,” she smirked as the other workers dispersed. Drake rolled his eyes.

“Thanks Quinn.” He said, but he was smiling.

“So, you appear to have misplaced your shirt, Drake.” Victoria teased. “Is this your way of getting photographed?”

Drake looked down and she saw a flush spread up his neck. “No, the opposite actually.”

“That plan will backfire,” Victoria replied. “Look at you.”

Drake looked down at her. “Victoria Quinn,” he said in a low voice. “Stop objectifying me.”

Victoria laughed. She couldn’t help it. She’d missed Drake and their reunion last night was so fraught with questions and accusations that this felt easier. Out in the sunshine, away from Madeleine, and her wild smiles and Liam and his sad eyes. “Sorry Drake,” Victoria said. “So what’s next? I am here to work after all.”

Drake handed her a hammer. “Come with me.”

*

As the morning progressed into noon and the sun rose over the building, it became more barn-like. Victoria had pulled her hair into a messy knot on top of her head and removed her shirt, tying it around her waist. Together she and Drake had hammered nails, drilled holes, raised beams and carried equipment. Not once did Victoria fall behind; she was determined to do a good job no matter the symbolism of the barn. Drake was a good teacher, he seemed to know how to work with wood and was patient in explaining what they were doing. Now that the structure was built they moved on to painting and it was only then that Victoria remembered the cameras. She felt a flash go off near her as she swept her brush up the wooden planks and glanced to the side. Justin was behind the cameraman giving her a thumbs up. Victoria turned back and tried to ignore them again, but it was hard now that she knew they were there. She supposed she’d known the whole time, but she’d been so engrossed in her task that she’d put them out of her mind. She crouched to dip the brush in the paint and Drake crouched down with her.

“You OK?” He asked quietly.

“Yeah,” she said with a glance at him. “Just forgot about the cameras.”

“Always best to ignore them.” Drake agreed, as they straightened and painting side by side. “Even when they’ve been the cause of harm recently.”

“Yeah,” Victoria said again. “I feel awkward now.”

“You don’t look awkward,” Drake assured her. “You look great. Although…” he looked at her arm. “You’ve got red on you.”

Victoria looked down and saw that there was a splatter of red paint down the back of her arm. “Oh man,” she whined. She looked down and assessed her clothes. There were small flecks all over her top. “Oh well, that looks pretty cool, I guess.” Drake followed her gaze and chuckled.

“How do you feel about this whole barn thing?” Victoria asked. “You happy with Liam's choice?”

Drake just looked at her. “I’m not happy about any of this.” He said. “You’re all so dejected. You, Liam and Madeleine. It’s all just so stupid to act like this is what’s best when you’re all miserable.”

“I’m sure Madeleine will cheer up once she’s married,” Victoria said. “And Liam will be happy eventually. According to Madeleine, that’s up to me at the moment.”

Drake stopped painting mid-stroke. “What?”

“Hasn’t Liam said?” Victoria asked, a bitter tone creeping into her voice. “Madeleine wants me to keep him happy behind the scenes.”

Drake’s eyes hardened and his nostrils flared, which was the only outward sign of anger. “That’s fucked up.” He said in a low voice. And then: “you weren’t tempted?”

“To be a dirty little secret for the King?” Victoria replied. “Funnily enough I didn’t leap at the chance.”

“Sorry Quinn,” Drake said. “If it helps… you’ve made a brilliant barn.”

Victoria laughed. “Yeah, we make a great team. Walker and Quinn, Barn Builders Extraordinaire.”

Drake laughed. “Quinn and Walker. Alphabetical.”

“Sure, that way I come first,” Victoria said with a cheeky smile. Drake laughed again and Victoria painted a few more strokes. “Doesn’t seem right that Liam is so miserable and we’re laughing. You should take him out somewhere. Has he left the palace and done anything fun since the ball?”

“Oh sure. He went to his Coronation.” Drake said bluntly. “And now he’s here.”

“Come on Drake,” Victoria said, turning imploring eyes on him. “You’re his best friend and he needs cheering up which you are excellent at.”

Drake sighed. “I’m his oldest friend, Quinn. I think _you’re_ his best friend now.”

Victoria frowned. “Well, that’s just sad. I can’t take him out and cheer him up. I can’t even talk to him at the moment. Drake, please?”

Drake rolled his eyes again. “God, fine, Quinn. You are the most annoying person, you know that?” They painted in silence for a bit. “I’m not a monster you know. I’ve tried to get him to go out and take his mind off everything. Liam sort of shut down after you left. He’s always been a private guy, but after the ball he just stopped letting anyone in.” Drake peered down at Victoria who was very intent on the wood she was painting. “I think it would be helpful for him if you could find a place for him in your life.”

“He doesn’t want—”

“He does.” Drake interrupted. “He knows he screwed up, but that doesn’t mean he never wants to see you again. I’m not saying be whatever Madeleine wants, I’m saying be his friend.”

Victoria hovered with her brush in mid-air. “It’s too hard.”

“Never said it would be easy,” Drake said, not unkindly. “But if you love someone and they can’t love you back, you don’t punish them for it. You figure out a way to fit them in your life and you find a way to be their friend.”

Victoria let out a slow breath. “ _OK_. I’ll be his friend.” Or at least she would try.

*

That afternoon there was a picnic to thank everyone who helped at the barn raising and to serve as a send-off for the tour which was scheduled to leave for Italy the next day. Victoria had found that tea dresses were among her new swag from the Beaumonts and Hana had helped her pick out a dress of pale green with large dusky pink roses printed all over it. She’d showered the paint off herself and washed her hair. Rather than dry it fully she’d arranged it into a low ballerina bun that seemed to go nicely with the dress, which was nipped in at her waist and then flared to her knees below.

Bertrand had found them back at the manor to explain a plan he had come up with. They were going to try to recreate the photographs of Victoria in order to garner any fresh information they could on them. Retracing the photographers' steps felt dis-quietening to Victoria, but she did want to get to the bottom of things so she agreed.

At the picnic, Hana and Victoria were almost immediately pulled aside by Madeleine. Victoria braced herself for a tongue lashing, but Madeleine just told her she scrubbed up fine, which was oddly nice of her.

Kiara and Penelope were standing with Madeleine, who explained that she had lined up a pair of eligible men for potential suitors for the ladies. Victoria noted that she didn’t direct this at her. Obviously, she was not in the market for a Lord given that she had sullied her reputation. She didn’t want a Lordly husband of course, but it still rankled that she was considered to be unfavourable. She decided to throw herself into helping Hana, who was nervous about meeting the men.

She certainly did better than Madeleine in terms of acting like a wing woman. Madeleines advice to Kiara was to speak as little English as possible to create an air of mystery, and for Penelope, she told her to just say as little as possible and just show off her delicate bone structure and good breeding instead.

King Liam brought over the two men and made the introductions. His eyes lingered on Victoria who offered another smile. If she forgot about the hurt feelings that still nipped at her and focused on how much she loved his face it was easy to smile for him. That was probably not the healthiest of ways to think, but it was working. He smiled back, looking a little closer to his old self.

Liam and Madeleine left the men with the ladies and made their way around to circulate.

Lord Neville and Rashad—also a lord, but one who preferred not to use his title, a fact Victoria couldn’t help but admire— both seemed pleasant enough. They seemed somewhat bewildered by Kiara and Penelope thanks to Madeleine's terrible advice, which allowed Hana to shine and Victoria did not let her down. It wasn’t hard to talk Hana up; Victoria just told the truth about her friend. About how she would be an asset as a wife and partner, how she mastered anything she set her mind to, how she already had plenty of skills from her dedicated upbringing. The men seemed impressed by her.

After they had gone the food started circulating. Drake sidled up to the group of ladies and muttered to Victoria and Hana that Bertrand and Maxwell were ready for the photography experiment. It was decided that a distraction was merited, which Hana volunteered for. She headed after a platter of curried chicken, Penelope at her heels. Victoria hoped Penelope didn’t have her heart set on a long conversation with Hana, given that she was about to upset the afternoon in the role of diversion creator.

Victoria was surprised when Kiara struck up a conversation with Drake. “It’s so nice to see you here, Drake.” Both Victoria and Drake were surprised to hear this.

“Me too,” Drake said after a moment. “But you know, I try to support Liam when I can.”

“You’re such a good friend to him,” Kiara said smiling. She stepped closer to him and placed a hand on his arm. “That’s partly why I’ve always liked you.”

Victoria's brows disappeared into her hairline at this and she had to turn away. This was new. She watched as Hana got closer to the platter.

“Er, really?” Drake asked, flustered, glancing around at Victoria to rescue him. She just smiled.

“It’s such a shame what happened to your sister,” Kiara said sympathetically. Now she had their attention.

“Wait, what’s that about Savannah?” Victoria asked.

“You know?” Kiara prompted, releasing Drakes arm. “The way she left without warning. She was always one of us, no matter that she was not noble. We all miss her.” She sighed. “And she was doing so well in her French lessons and I was surp—”

“French lessons?” Drake gaped. “Savannah didn’t speak French.”

“I was teaching her befo—”

This time the interruption came from a loud crash behind them. Victoria turned to see that Hana had accidentally-on-purpose upended the entire tray of sauce-covered chicken. A crowd formed around them as Madeleine screeched over Hanas apologies.

“Drake, time to go,” Victoria whispered quickly. Drake turned to her.

“Wait, I need to speak to Kiara.” He looked torn.

“OK, you stay here. I’ll see you later.” Victoria smiled. She didn’t want to drag him away from something that important. She turned and headed out. Within a few seconds, Drake was by her side.

“I can talk to her another time. This might be our only chance to investigate this.” Drake explained quickly.

“Thanks Drake.”

Away from the picnic, around the side of the house that Victorias window overlooked Maxwell found them. He had a camera in his hands, as well as a small plate of food, and a print out of the infamous snap of Victorias back. She glanced at it once then looked away. It was still hateful that her scars were out there for the world to see.

As Maxwell fumbled with the camera and his snacks, Drake snatched it off him and started to take shots of Victoria's window, comparing the image on the screen to the photo from the papers. “This doesn’t look right. From down here you’d never see you or Tariq inside the room.”

They walked over to a tree that was growing outside the house and considered it. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Victoria asked.

Drake nodded. “Yep.” Then almost in unison, they both said “I’m going to have to climb that.”

Drake frowned. “Come on Quinn, you’re in a dress.”

“I have climbed trees in dresses more awkward than this one before,” Victoria said planting one hand on her hip. “You can give me a boost if you’re feeling like a gentleman, but I’m going up there.”

Drake sighed. “Fine.”

As he helped her reach the lowest branches, Victoria shot back with. “And if you’re really feeling polite, you won’t look up my dress.” which was in hindsight a mistake as he almost dropped her before she had a good grasp of the branch. Once in place, Victoria looked forwards and gasped. “I can see right into my room.” Bertrand was in place, standing where she had been that night and she could see him so clearly. “Hand me the camera.” Drake leaned up as she leaned down and then she lined up the shot, snapping a few for good measure. “See?” She dropped it down to Drake and he and Maxwell compared the images.

“You’re right. This must have been where the photographer was.” Maxwell said with a growl. “They must have been lying in wait for you. I’m going to go get Bertrand.” And with that, he scurried off.

Drake looked up at Victoria in the tree, still gazing into her room. “You coming down, Quinn?”

“Yeah.” She said without moving. Then she sighed and looked down. “Just wondering how someone could set up something so cruel. What did I ever do to them?”

“You existed?” Drake said bluntly. “And you had Liam's full attention?”

“Hey, Drake?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for coming to my rescue that night,” she said. She started to climb from the tree, dropping down before Drake. “I don’t know if I ever thanked you enough.”

Drake was resolutely not looking at her now. “It’s fine, Quinn. I’m just sorry about what happened afterwards.”

“Don’t be,” she said ducking down to catch his eye. He looked at her and took a shaky breath. “You were there for me when I needed you.”

“Yeah, but you never told Liam about Tariq, did you?” Drake said gloomily. “I can’t help but blame myself for that. If I hadn’t… if it weren’t for me then maybe he would have been prepared the night of the ball and been able to hold off the guards. I feel responsible for that.”

Victoria frowned. This was a new way of thinking to her, but it made some sense. Why hadn’t she told Liam about Tariq? Was it because she would have felt compelled to lie to him about what happened after Drake came to her aid? Or would she have told Liam the truth, that she had kissed his best friend only hours after their talk about her potential as queen in the maze?

Victoria turned and looked down to avoid looking at Drake. The memory sat heavily on her and she could only imagine how awful Drake felt, too; if he really was feeling guilt over their kiss in Applewood Manor, the last thing he would want would be to discuss it.

A flash of something caught her eye in the bushes around the tree; she’d half-landed in one and bent some of the leaves aside, revealing something glossy. Victoria bent and tugged at the thing glinting in the light. It was a laminated card. “Hey, look at this.”

Victoria held it out to Drake as the Beaumonts arrived. “I found something.”

Maxwell took it and showed it to Bertrand. “Mansingh?”

“That’s the company hired to provide security for the party,” Bertrand explained as Maxwell scrubbed at the dirt on the card. “Maxwell!”

“No, but look at this picture.” Maxwell held it out and everyone peered down at the photo of a woman with dark hair who stared impassively back at them.

“That must be the photographer,” Bertrand said. “How did she get hold of a security card?”

“She must have had help,” Victoria said darkly. “Someone got her security clearance and access to a private press-free party.”

“You’re right,” Drake agreed. “That badge gave her the ability to get into place to take those pictures.”

“She must have been the reporter who was discovered though,” Maxwell said. “Remember? It was a real shock that a reporter had gotten on site.”

“Well, whoever kicked her out didn’t do a great job if they didn’t check for pictures,” Victoria grumbled.

“Or they were part of it?” Drake put forth. “Plans work best when there are fewer people in the know, but who knows how deep this thing runs?”

Victoria sighed and Maxwell slipped his arm around her. “We’re getting there, Victoria.” He said softly.

“Just be careful, Quinn,” Drake added.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for the chapter is by CHVRCHES.


	6. The Night We Met

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam just needs to see for himself that Victoria is safe at Applewood.

_Haunted by the ghost of you_

Liam was almost at his door when the thought struck him. It wasn’t the thought so much that turned him around and made him head in the opposite direction, but the sheer terror that gripped him with the thought. As he walked to Victorias room he mused sadly on the fact that Applewood Estate no longer felt like the safe haven of his childhood. Not if his beloved could be harmed within its boundary. No matter the guards, no matter how rigorously he had insisted the security be, he couldn’t shake the thought of yet more harm coming to Victoria. He just had to check on her. See for himself that she was alright.

Drake had persuaded him to go out after the barn raising as they had a free evening, and Liam hadn’t been able to say no. He’d tried, but Drake had been oddly persistent and worn him down fast. Then they’d spent a good portion of their evening talking about her anyway. Drake got to see Victoria more than Liam and had more insight into her current state of mind. Liam couldn’t deny that he was incredibly jealous of Drake, but he was equally grateful for this peek into Victorias investigation. Now he just had to see her for himself and he could go off to bed and lie awake, missing her and worrying about her. Sleep wasn’t much of a companion these days, not with longing and anxiety making themselves his bedfellows instead.

He hesitated as he came to her door, but even as he considered turning around again his arm was up and knocking softly on the wood. A noise from inside and the door flew open, Victorias tear-streaked face appearing, snarled into a grimace.

“I told you to leave me alone—” she started, but then stopped when she saw Liam's face. “Oh, Liam! What are you doing here?” She scrubbed at her face with the heel of her hand.

“Victoria? What’s the matter?” Liam asked, at once concerned.

She glanced down the corridor. “Come in before someone sees you.” She said, moving aside to let him in and shutting the door behind him. Liam was glad that this was her reaction because he knew he couldn’t go back now. Not with her like this.

Victoria was in her usual sleep attire, with a large oversized hoodie over the top and she had thrust her hands into the front pocket as soon as she shut the door. There was an unopened bottle of wine and two glasses on the bedside table. Liam looked at that and then back to Victoria who looked emotionally bedraggled. Liam's hands twitched, but he remembered her plea that he not touch her and he held back. The many glasses of whiskey he’d drunk with Drake were making it hard; the fire in his bloodstream ignited in anger seeing her hurt face and he wanted to hold her and keep her safe instead.

“What happened?” Liam asked firmly. He wasn’t leaving without the answer.

Victoria shrugged. “Someone got the wrong idea about me.” She answered flatly. “He thought I’d be lonely and wanted to know if he could keep me company.”

Liam’s eyes narrowed coldly. “Who?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Victoria said, looking away from him.

“Yes, it does,” Liam replied. “Who was so disrespectful to you?”

“Just some lord,” Victoria answered, moving to her bed and sitting down, tucking one leg beneath her. Her hands were still hidden in the folds of the hoodie. “I don’t want to make trouble.”

“Victoria, it _is_ important,” Liam said, striding towards her and sitting down with her. “I need to know if someone in my court is trying to pressure you—”

“Liam, stop,” Victoria said, finally looking at him. She wasn’t shouting, didn’t even raise her voice, but the intensity in her tone made him pause. “It’s bad enough without you cracking down on them and making me more of a target.”

Liam paused. “Them? How often does this happen?”

Victoria looked down again and waited a long moment before speaking again. “I’m not marriage material,” she said slowly. “I don’t care, I’m not after a husband like the other ladies at court. But I guess because I’m the commoner with no family around and because of the pictures and the stories, I’m seen as someone the lords can have some fun with while they court their future spouses.”

Liam stayed very, very still while she talked, but inside he was a riot of noise and movement. His blood boiled, his mind whirred. This was utterly inexcusable. Just one more way he had managed to hurt her. It was his fault that her privacy was invaded, his fault those stories and pictures got out. His fault she was now being harassed at court while she tried to clear her name. Shame swelled in him. “Victoria…”

She slipped out one hand and brushed her hair off her face. “It’s fine. I told him to leave me alone. He brought the wine.” She added gesturing to the bedside table beside her. “I didn’t relish the ass grabbing, but it was nothing I couldn’t handle.”

Liam looked away. The very day they’d met a patron at her bar had done the exact same thing and she’d lost her job. He’d hoped to take her away from that kind of life, though of course he was no knight in shining armour and she was no helpless damsel. Oh boy, had he ever messed up.

“Victoria I’m so sorry,” he said tonelessly. “I…”

There wasn’t really anything to say on the matter. 

“It’s not your fault.” Victoria offered, but they both knew that it sounded flat between them. “I’ll get the truth out about the stories and then I’ll get apologies.” She smiled wanly. “That’s the best I can hope for, right?”

Liam rubbed his brow between his eyes with his thumb. “Yes.” That didn’t seem enough so he turned his head to look at her, sitting against the headboard, all tucked up and keeping herself small. “Yes, every paper will have to take back everything they wrote and they will be printing apologies until I say they can stop.” A fierce flash crossed his face. “And that will be a very long time indeed.”

Victoria smiled a little warmer now, which was heartening to see. “Victoria, I hope you know that I believe in you wholeheartedly,” Liam said suddenly. “I know you can do this. You can get through this. But please…” he paused a moment trying to find the right words. “I may not be able to help you openly, but I am here for you. Whatever you need I will do my utmost to do for you.”

She met his gaze and Liam felt his heart leap to his throat. The whiskey in his blood made his tongue loose. “I would do anything for you, Victoria.”

Victoria didn’t answer for a long time. She just looked at him with her large blue eyes full of questions. Liam almost held his breath as he waited. Just as he had decided that she probably wasn’t going to say anything in response, she opened her mouth and slowly, hesitantly, asked him something he would be only too happy to fulfil. “Will you… stay with me for a while?” She couldn’t look at him while she spoke, but Liam nodded even so.

“Of course, I will,” he said. “I should wait anyway until people are sleeping before I head back. I can’t risk anyone seeing me here in case that gets back to the wrong people and puts you in more danger. I couldn’t have that.”

Victoria nodded, but her eyes drifted to the wine near her. “Can you get rid of that? Unless you want some. I couldn’t drink it.”

Liam nodded and rose. “I know a few hiding spots in this room. I’ll make sure you don’t have to see it anymore.” As he busied himself finding the hidden compartment behind the bookcase and secreting the wine and glasses away there, he heard Victoria rise from the bed. When he turned around she was standing by the large window. He walked over to her to stand behind her, following her gaze. “Drake tells me you made a discovery about that tree?”

She nodded. “Yep. Whoever got those photos was lying in wait out there. In that tree with her camera. Just waiting for the right moment to ruin everything.” She let out a noise of frustration. “What kind of person— what kind of _woman_ , takes photos of an assault and sells them to the papers? So they can run a story about how it was all my doing?” She broke off shaking her head. Liam watched her dark mane ripple and shine as she wrapped her arms around her chest. “And who hates me that much that they arranged it all and paid who knows how much to get her here?”

Liam swallowed painfully around the lump in his throat. “We will find out.” He offered, but it sounded hollow to his ears. Her head angled further downwards and the thin wire of his resolve finally wore out. Without pausing to think better of it, he reached for her, clasping her shoulders and spinning her around and into his chest. She didn’t resist and instead sank against him gratefully. Liam held her as closely as he could while she cried.

“I know,” he murmured quietly against her head, pressing his lips to her hair. He knew he shouldn’t, but really at this moment did it matter? They were behaving impeccably in public, living through the ache of not touching, staying politely distant from each other. He spent every day with another woman on his arm, a woman he could never care for and spent every night worrying about Victoria, praying for another day of her relative safety. These were trying times and he would be damned if he didn’t try to comfort her if it was in his power to do so.

For a long while, they didn’t speak. As far as Liam was concerned there was nothing to say. He could apologise again, but that wasn’t helping anything. He could tell the truth that they both knew, which was that he loved her desperately, but for what purpose? Drake had told him that afternoon that if he wanted to help her he had to go easy on her. Be her friend. Not anything complicated and painful. The trouble was that what they had was complicated and painful.

Should he tell her the truth? She’d only asked one thing of them all: that they tell her of their plans. But would this only hurt, not help? To tell her that he and Bertrand were scouring the rules connected to the law that had mandated that Liam be engaged or married by his coronation. The law that brought Victoria into harms way and had dangled the precious hope before them both that they could be together forever. He’d had six months to weigh up the pros and cons of each suitor and when it had come down to it, he’d had to make a snap decision within seconds. Now he needed to find out how he could legally break the engagement and find a way to have Victoria and protect her and love her and keep her safe. So far it was not going well, so he kept his mouth shut. Hope was a warm little flame, but it was fragile and could be so easily snuffed out. And the darkness and chill that set in afterwards was unbearable. He wouldn’t do that to her.

Instead, he would hold her and let her cry against his shirt. That was something he could do. He could feel her tears saturate the fabric and dampen his chest. He stood and held fast even though each tear burned like bitter acid.

After a while, Victoria raised her head and looked up at him even though she made no move to leave his arms. Liam was fine with that; he had no intention of letting go anytime soon. “Drake told me I needed to let you back in. That we should try to be friends.”

“He said the same to me,” Liam admitted. “Said he’s sick of everyone being so unhappy.”

“Do you think we can do that?” Victoria asked. “Be friends? It seems impossible to be your friend when I..."

“All I know is I can’t live without you,” Liam said unabashedly honest. “I know I need you in my life in some way, even if I can’t be with you.”

“But that’s the problem,” Victoria said, and now she moved back. Liam's arms felt cold without her. “Can you imagine that in a few short months I have to watch you marry Madeleine? You standing beside her reciting vows and exchanging rings pledging your lives to each other. I can’t do that.”

Liam nodded. “I understand. I can’t even think about it. The thought of marrying another woman while you are right there… how could I even look at her knowing I could turn my head and find you? I don’t know how I’ll be able to get through it either.”

Victoria grabbed his hand. “Liam, I’m sorry. I know this isn’t just hard for me.”

“Don’t be sorry.” Liam insisted, squeezing her hand. “It’s you I’m concerned for. I need to know who was plotting against you so I can deal with them. I can’t bear not knowing who’s threatened you. When I find out…” his eyes darkened, his voice deepened. “There will be hell to pay.”

Victoria gazed up at him, her face mirroring his. The intensity of Liams feelings matched so clearly with her expression. Then she surprised him by lurching up onto the tips of her toes and kissing him. Liam was thrown, but his lips remembered hers too well and he was responding before his brain caught up on what was happening. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss. Liam bent and cupped her backside to pull her up to him. She made a soft noise and he almost fell apart to hear it, wrapping her legs around his waist. He got the sense that if he spoke out loud the spell would be broken and he wasn’t quite ready for it to be. So he kissed her back over and over, holding her up as she tangled her hands through his hair and traced her fingertips along the nape of his neck. He groaned deeply against her mouth and she frantically kissed him back.

“Liam,” she breathed her forehead against his. Liam tried to catch his breath as she spoke. “We’re not friends.”

“I…” Liam floundered. His head was addled with intoxication; both the alcohol and the smell of Victoria, the feel of her in his arms once more. “What do you want?”

Victoria pulled back ever so slightly so that they could gaze upon each other’s faces. Her eyes were so dark against her pale skin. “You.”

Liam forgot to breathe for a moment, but he wasn’t going to argue with her. “As you wish.” He murmured and then crossed the room, her still in his arms until they tumbled to the bed. Victoria immediately righted herself, going onto her knees and pulling her hoodie off. Her hair flew up and then cascaded around her shoulders, releasing the scent of her shampoo into the air. Beneath the hoodie, she wore a vest top and what looked like nothing else. Liam reached over and tugged down one of the straps so he could kiss the skin at her neck and trace down to her collarbone. She shivered with pleasure and pulled him onto her. There was none of the mystery or romance of their first time back in the hedge maze, this was frantic and desperate on both sides. Victoria slid her hands inside Liams shirt, ripping at the buttons to open enough in order to pull it off over his head. Once his chest was exposed she sat up and went to work, kissing him all over, from his chest to his waist and everywhere in between. Liam moaned, it was too much and he needed to get out of his trousers as soon as possible. Victoria seemed to agree, unbuckling his belt without stopping her kissing exploration of his body. “God, Victoria…”

When his belt was loose, Liam pulled back and stood, dropping his slacks and kicking them away. He hesitated with his thumbs hooked into his briefs. “Yes?” He asked.

“Yes,” Victoria replied, pulling off her vest top. Liam almost forgot to breathe when he saw the moonlight across her breasts, nipples tightening in the pale light and then he removed his underwear and then he was naked before her. Victoria knelt up on the bed as he stood, her breast nudging his erection as she moved, her warm skin sliding against him like liquid. Liam was almost mad with lust in that moment. She cupped his face and kissed him again, her breasts pressed between them. Liam slid his hands down her sides and tugged at the waistband of her loose pants.

This was all new. As well as they knew each other’s bodies, for all their time spent together, this was new. This was everything. With a gentle nudge, Liam had Victoria on her back, pulling her pants off so that both were naked in the moonlight. Liam roamed his gaze over every inch of her body. She looked up at him with heavily lidded, languid eyes. “In my bag.” She said with a nod across the room. “My wash bag.”

Liam followed her instructions and found what she was referring to. She hadn’t moved when he returned, protected now and ready. “Are you sure?” he asked, hoping she wouldn’t change her mind, though he wouldn’t blame her if she did.

She propped herself up on her elbows. “If you are?”

“God, _yes_ ,” he growled, leaning down and capturing her lips with his again. They moved together, him entering her without resistance, fitting perfectly as they had before, but this time there were no clothes between them.

“Liam… Liam… Liam,” Victoria spoke his name like a prayer over and over again and Liam buried his face in her neck, in her hair. They were skin and sweat and friction and they kissed and kissed until they both saw stars.

Afterwards, they lay together, wrapped in the blanket and each other’s arms, Victoria's head nestled perfectly against Liams chest, his chin on her head and they caught their breath. Neither spoke and eventually, the breaths deepened into the peaceful rhythm of sleep.

Later still Liam awoke, startled momentarily to feel the warm body in his arms. They hadn’t moved and he looked down to the sleeping face of the woman he loved with all of his heart and the fear set in.

What time was it? Had anyone noticed his absence? Did anyone know where he was? He carefully untangled his arm from Victoria and set her down on the bed, slipping out from under the blanket, tucking it around her. He dressed quickly, everything but his shoes. Victoria continued to sleep as Liam pulled his clothes back on, smoothing them down along with his hair, trying to undo all the haphazard tells of sex. His eyes alighted on the used condom and his stomach dropped. He couldn't leave that for Victoria to deal with, for the maids to spot as they emptied the bin in this room; what if this was another way to arm the press into the smear campaign against Victoria. Feeling unbelievably dirty, Liam drew some tissues from the container on the vanity and gathered up the condom and the empty packet, wrapping it all up in a bundle and shoving it into his trouser pocket. He would find somewhere to throw away this bundle, somewhere far away from Victoria. 

His heart was beating an unpleasantly shaky pattern in his chest. He couldn’t shake the dread that had set in. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep. He hadn’t meant to have sex with Victoria. There were a great many things he had never had any intention to do. He fastened his buttons with trembling fingers, knowing had to get back before he was missed. If anyone came to his door and found him gone an alarm would sound. The king couldn’t just go for a wander in the middle of the night. He couldn’t bring that shame to Victorias door. Madeleine might not have cared if they stole intimacy together, but only if no-one else knew and there was no embarrassment on her.

And then there was Victoria. She had been trying to make good with him and then she had declared them not to be friends and then it had all escalated from there. Was that what she wanted? She had certainly wanted it at the time, but what about now? What about after the feelings of lust had been soothed and they just had the reality of their situation again?

The idea of leaving her asleep was unimaginable but so was the thought of waking her to read regret on her face. Liam stood looking down at Victoria, at how peaceful she looked, how perfect. And she _was_ perfect. It was only when he touched her that things became ruined. He had brought all of this down upon her. She opened herself, dropped her guard for him, let him in and he brought despair in response.

In the end, she remained asleep and brave, while he slunk away, awake and a coward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter song is by Lord Huron, The Night We Met.
> 
> I toyed with changing the rating for this it's more detailed than the sex scene in the Spark, but I didn't think it was particularly Explicit, but I'm happy to change it if others disagree. 
> 
> So yeah. These two crazy kids in love just can't help themselves.
> 
> Also I'm sorry this is being posted two days late; I've been unwell for the last couple of days, but I'm vaguely human again now


	7. Rage and Romance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Engagement Tour goes international, with an ally rejoining the party, and Victoria gives in to her emotions.

_You’re out of luck, you’re just a poison princess_

The train swayed on the track as it sped through Cordonia on the way to Italy for the first leg of the international tour. Victoria sat alone in her carriage and waited for the clock to tick forward. In her hand was a letter she had found that morning with instructions to meet at five o’clock precisely in another carriage. In her head were images of her and Liam from the night before.

In truth, the only surprising thing about waking up alone was that she wasn’t at all shocked by it. They had fallen asleep together, him holding her like he would never let her go, but wasn’t that just the kicker? He always _had_ to let her go. Just as he had done back at the Coronation Ball. She might have stolen him for a brief portion of the night, but she couldn’t keep him. He was like sweet, heady smoke; intoxicating when he was nearby, but he would always fade away. There was no way to pin down smoke. It was eternally elusive and so, too, was Liam. He didn’t belong with her.

And so, Victoria had woken alone and naked under their blanket. It was cold without him and she’d shivered awake to find Liam was gone. That was the end of sleep, she knew, so she’d gotten up and dressed and packed her meagre belongings only to find a note under her door. At that moment she’d lurched stupidly to the thought that Liam had left it, but that would have broken the rule regarding leaving nothing that could be intercepted. Even so, her pulse had swooned when she opened the note, just in case.

Now on the train, Victoria read the note again even though its short words were etched onto her mind. “ _If you want to root out your enemies, meet me in the boutique car of the train tomorrow at 5 pm on the dot. Alone. O._ ”

It was sweet, in a way, that Olivia thought she needed to sign anything on the note; it was so clearly from her. Victoria could practically hear her tone of voice as she read it in her head. In any case, Victoria had kept the note to herself and was ready to see her again. She could use some cold, steely vengeance and hoped Olivia was bringing plenty to share.

She’d claimed a headache and lack of sleep to get away from Maxwell, Bertrand and now Justin, her growing entourage and none had questioned her. Victoria had been quiet and withdrawn before that, sorrowfully dwelling on her smoke-like lover and how much she missed him so it was no great stretch to pretend to be under the weather in order to retire early. They all wanted her at her best when she attended the dinner later that night held by Italian statesmen to welcome the new King of Cordonia and his fiancée.

Finally, her phone displayed the time to be close enough so Victoria sneaked out of her sleeping quarters and made her way to the rendezvous.

Victoria cautiously made her way inside the car. It occurred to her how strange it was that the train should have a carriage dedicated to fashion with two seamstresses on hand to make alterations, but then again she couldn’t really be surprised anymore by the things she saw. The nobility of Europe lived very different lives to waitresses of New York. There was no-one in view as Victoria pushed past dresses and peered around. “Hello?” Victoria said softly. “Olivia?”

“I knew you would know it was me,” the voice came all of a sudden from behind her and Victoria whirled. Olivia stood there, her red hair piled elegantly atop her head, wearing an effortlessly crisp black suit cut in the sharpest lines Victoria had ever seen and heels that added several inches to her already imposing figure. The shirt beneath the blazer was blood red, and she had nails painted to match. Victoria had no idea where she had sprung from so silently, but she was so pleased to see her.

“I missed you,” Victoria said, speaking the first words to come to mind. Olivia hiked one brow.

“Sure you did.”

“I did.” Victoria insisted with a smile. “Can I hug you?”

“No.” Came the imperious reply. Victoria’s smile only broadened.

“I got your note.” She said holding it aloft. Olivia rolled her eyes and started rifling through her purse.

“Clearly, or else you wouldn’t be here,” Olivia replied. She pulled out a lighter. “You should have destroyed that by now.” She flicked the lighter and a flame licked the edge of the paper. Victoria yelped and pulled back—a typical reaction for her when it came to fire—and the paper started to fall. Olivia shot out her hand and grabbed the paper, even as the flames caught. She deftly turned it up so the flames were above her hand and smoothly fanned the paper this way and that under the fire ate up the entire thing, only letting the smallest morsel fall to the ground, where she pressed her toe to it to crush out the flames. Victoria didn’t like the fire, but she couldn’t help but feel impressed with the way Olivia mastered it and didn’t seem to get burned once.

“Are you descended from dragons?” She asked with a delicate teasing tone. Olivia looked into her eyes directly.

“Yes,” she answered with a quirk in her lips. Then she replaced her lighter and closed the purse, her eyes more sombre. “I saw the papers of course. Quite a mess.”

Victoria nodded. “Yeah.” There didn’t seem much else left to say. Olivia didn’t offer any meaningless platitudes, but her eyes softened ever so slightly in sympathy.

“I didn’t believe the story for a second, I want you to know that,” Olivia said firmly. “I could see the affection you felt for Liam and I know you wouldn’t have hurt him. Anyone with a brain could see that.” She sniffed and tucked her purse under her arm, straightening her back like a rod. “I take it you are seeking out the perpetrator of this ridiculous story?”

Victoria nodded, momentarily too overwhelmed to speak. Her friends had stood by her without question, but for Olivia to also believe her immediately was really something. They weren’t exactly friends and it could have suited Olivia to set against Victoria; she had won the attention of the man they both loved after all. “That’s the plan. How about you? Got anywhere in your own investigations?”

“Who says I’m investigating anything?”

“Come on, you’re Duchess Olivia Vanderwall Nevrakis,” Victoria said. “I remember how you described yourself when we first met: you Nevrakis’ are known for crushing your enemies absolutely.”

Olivia pinked at the words. Victoria could tell it meant something to her that Victoria had remembered that, however, her face did not look happy. “That might have been what I believed once. You know as I do that my name truly stands for betrayal and high treason. I can’t stand for that though. It scared me enough to run all the way back home, but that won’t happen again.” She sighed. “And truthfully whoever sent my letter the night of the ball has knowledge about my parents that I do. I suppose a part of me is hungry for answers. Whatever the truth is, I want to know. No matter how much I might not like it.”

Victoria nodded. “Better to know than always wonder?”

“I suppose so, yes,” Olivia said, her gaze flicking back to Victoria.

“You shouldn’t have to go through that alone, Olivia,” Victoria said. “If you want to join forces that goes both ways. I want to be here for you. I told you that my parents weren’t exactly the type you brag about to your friends. I grew up with them never trying to hide it so it seemed normal until it didn’t. I can clearly remember the shock of realising that actually, they were the bad guys in life. What I’m saying is that while we might not have the same skeletons in our closets, I can understand in a way that maybe others can’t. And I’d like to think you know that if you want a friend for this then I’m here for you.”

Olivia watched her shrewdly as she talked, but couldn’t seem to see anything suspicious in her face or hear it in her tone. She nodded curtly. “Very well. Thank you.”

Olivia turned and started looking through the gowns on the racks as a silence set in. Victoria wasn’t entirely sure what she ought to be doing so she just watched. Olivia began to speak over her shoulder. “My enquiries have led me to discern that this is a multilevel conspiracy. My letter reached me after passing through several sets of hands, though I am certain most did not know what they were passing on.”

“I learned from a maid at Applewood that a noblewoman was behind the confusion over rooms and sent Tariq to me.” Victoria shared. “And that a reporter was waiting in the god damned tree outside my window for the right moment.”

Olivia huffed at this. “All these machinations. Yet if all the people involved knew the reasons and how the scheme all came together, someone would have cracked by now. No, there is a mastermind we can track it all back too.”

“You think it’s all linked?” Victoria asked. “Your letter and mine?”

“Absolutely,” Olivia replied. “However, I can’t quite believe you let Liam go off with Madeleine of all people.” She said without looking back. “What exactly happened at the ball?”

Victoria instinctively drew her arms around herself at the memory. “It all happened so fast.” She explained softly. “After you left I tried to get to Liam to talk to him, but the speeches were starting and it just wasn’t possible. And then the story broke and after that, I really couldn’t speak to him. Bastien hauled me out of the ballroom before I could quite realise what was happening.”

Olivia turned back ever so slightly. “And Liam allowed this?”

“I don’t think he had much choice?” Victoria offered weakly. “He told me later that he was scared for me.”

“That makes sense.” Olivia nodded thoughtfully. “That must have been very difficult for you.”

“Yeah, it was,” Victoria replied.

“And have you seen much of him since returning to court?”

Victoria flushed with heat at the innocent question. Olivia didn’t miss a trick. “I see.”

“No, it’s not like that,” Victoria immediately refuted. “I… Madeleine seems to think I should be doing whatever I can to keep Liam happy. Drake wants me to be his friend. I don’t even know what Liam wants, not really. It’s so… it’s been hard.”

Olivia sniffed and returned to the gowns.

“Well, I can’t tell you what to do, but I can tell you that I am re-joining court,” Olivia said, confirming what Victoria had already suspected. “I will be alongside you as we combine our resources to solve the mystery against us.” She spun around holding a red dress across her arms. “We have to save Liam from that woman.”

Victoria didn’t think there was anything to be done as far as Liam and Madeleine were concerned but she wasn’t about to say anything to go against Olivias ferocity. Not when she was pledging her assistance to Victorias cause. She nodded to the dress. “An excellent choice.”

“Isn’t it?” Olivia said, striding over to Victoria and holding the dress out to her. Victoria looked up at her in surprise and Olivia smirked. “This gown is for you. This dress is Italian couture and happens to be the favourite colour of an important member of the Italian parliament who is hosting the dinner. I presume this is all news to you.”

Victoria didn’t even try to hide that. Olivia rolled her eyes. “Those Beaumonts. Honestly.”

“But this dress is red…” Victoria said awkwardly. “I mean, that’s your—”

“Look,” Olivia said holding out the dress for Victoria to take. “That was then, this is now. We can… share the colour. Alright?”

“Alright.”

Within a few moments, Victoria was zipped into the gown. It was made out of sheer silk Georgette up to her neck, but laid over the top were strands of bold red silk with a shimmer of gold thread throughout. The gown was tight at her waist and then felt to the ground in a column of scarlet. The sheer fabric was pale enough to almost exactly match her skin tone so the red shocks of silk looked like they were clinging to her body through some magical construction. Victoria left her hair loose, with a gentle curl to it and Olivia handed her a red lip stain to match the gown.

“Olivia, this is beautiful, but I’m rather out of money at this point,” Victoria admitted. Olivia cocked her head, one hand planted on her jutting hip.

“Don’t be stupid Victoria,” she said. “The gown is bought and paid for. Just wear it and prove to Liam what a fool he has been. It will make me feel better.”

*

“Victoria?” Maxwell asked with a look of utter surprise on his face. “Why are you dressed up? I thought you were resting.” He turned to Bertrand. “Did you do this?”

“Actually, shocking as it may be, I can dress myself,” Victoria said, sitting down and sliding her feet into her sharp black shoes. She didn’t mention that she had had help this time. Just before she had taken off, Olivia had given Victoria one final dire warning. “Maxwell and Bertrand might consider you their own, but you never know if you can really trust them”. Victoria had waved it away, but her last encounter with Liam had got her all out of sorts. Olivia was back, which made her feel happy, but it was true that the Beaumonts had a history of keeping back their family secrets. She might have been accepted into their house, but not wholly. Not without some boundaries. Maybe it was smart to keep everyone at arms length. That had to be the rule going forward with Liam at least.

“You look very nice,” Bertrand said before returning to his paper. Victoria straightened up and looked to Justin who was just entering the carriage, tapping away at his phone. He finished what he was doing and gave her an appraising gaze.

“Now that’s a look.” He said approvingly. “It’ll photograph well both inside and outside the restaurant.”

Victoria frowned. “Wait, the press will be inside?” Justin nodded.

“Yep,” Justin said. “This is probably one of the most hotly anticipated legs of the tour. Your host was a friend of Liam's mother and is married to a Cordonian noble.”

“So his opinion matters both abroad and at home.” Bertrand put in, folding up the paper.

“Charm offensive is the key,” Justin said. “You want to impress him as best you can.”

“Hana taught me some basic Italian,” Victoria said. “And I got a tip about the dress.”

“Excellent prep work,” Justin said with a grin. “I love it. Makes my job so much easier.” Justin glanced at his phone again and started typing a reply to whatever had just flashed on the screen. “I don’t suppose you follow football?”

“I take it you mean the thing we call soccer?” Victoria asked. “I do, actually. Soccer was my first love. I always wanted to play professionally.”

“Fantastic,” Justin said. The notes of longing in her voice didn’t seem to resonate with him and he didn’t ask any questions. “His team won their match last night so if you bring that up with some jargon, you’re golden.”

“Jargon?” Victoria said with a snort, glad to finally have something court related that she already felt she had the upper hand in. “Soccer isn’t complicated. I’ll look up the match highlights on my phone before we get there though.”

“Good, good,” Justin replied not looking up from his screen. “And as always you are a perfect angel…”

“…who loves Cordonia.” Victoria finished. “And Italy, too, I guess.”

Justin grinned. “Bingo.”

*

Hana met them off the train and they all walked to the restaurant. It was a gorgeous night and the setting for dinner was a large steel and glass construct, that was romantic despite its sharp architecture. Lights hung from the ceiling and the steel of the roof shimmered with a rainbow glow. Victoria posed for photographs with Hana and the Beaumonts both outside and in. The restaurant was bustling with diners, diplomats and of course the newspapers. Victoria stayed on message as best she could and spoke about the beauty of Italy and how lucky she felt to be there. It seemed to satisfy the press.

Meeting Signor Francesco was pleasant enough and went fine until Victoria brought up the soccer match, after which the two of them chatted with much more fervour and friendliness. It had been a match of equals with the score at one-all as they went into injury time, whereupon Francescos team had managed to score with a gravity-defying header just as the stoppage time ran out. Victoria had watched the goal on replay and Francesco insisted on pulling out his phone and they watched it again together. Victoria found herself laughing and having a good time as long as she focused on the match.

She had managed to effortlessly avoid Madeleine and Liam for the whole dinner until the tiramisu was finished and the coffees came out, giving the diners a chance to mingle. Victoria snatched a few precious moments alone as she made her way back from the bathroom when she felt eyes upon her. Turning, she felt she knew the eyes belonged to Liam and as she met his gaze, she watched the blush spread over his face and he glanced down, swallowing hard. There were several feet of empty space between them, but to Victoria, it felt like an ocean. She lifted her chin and kept her face neutral. She had nothing to feel bad about and she would be damned if she were to reveal the turmoil of emotion inside her to him now. _He_ had left _her_. Let him feel bad.

It seemed she got her wish; desire fought with self-loathing on Liam's face as he swept his gaze across her body. Victoria had to hand it to Olivia. The dress was working out exactly as she had planned.

As they stood and shared this complicated look a flash went off to Victorias left. She turned as if in slow motion blinking the spots from her eyes and sought out the photographer intruding on this moment. With a lurch of realisation, her eyes hit upon the woman from the security pass. She felt a rush of burning wrath that melted her features into a look of fury and watched the woman's face pale in response. Within moments she had turned to leave and Victoria was after her. The photographer glanced over her shoulder and bolted. Victoria heard someone call her name, but they might as well have been calling from the moon for all she listened. Her vision shrank to a narrow tunnel in which the photographer was caught and everything else fell away.

The photographer fled the restaurant and Victoria pursued. A mad desperation hit the photographer as she tried to put distance between her and Victoria, and she grabbed a passing woman to knock in Victorias way. Victoria swerved the falling woman, not caring to stop and see if she was alright. The photographer bolted out across the road and Victoria followed. Cars honked, but mercifully none hit her. Her feet screamed with each precarious step landing on the heels, but they held. Her ankle protested but endured. It would hurt later. Right now there was only this chase and the thought of getting her.

Another shout came from behind Victoria but she just pressed on. The photographer ducked out of sight behind an alley, but she wasn’t quick enough to elude Victoria's sharp eyes and as she turned down the same alley she felt a thrill to see that it lead to a dead end. The photographer had stopped and was trying to catch her breath, but she stood up when she saw Victoria, holding her hands aloft in a gesture of peace. Victoria, her eyes narrow slits, her mind full of black hatred strode towards the woman

“Ok, look—” the woman started, clearly not anticipating the real danger she was in. Victorias body acted without remorse. Perhaps somewhere inside her, there was a voice trying to get through to her with reason, but if so she couldn’t hear it. All was black and red and pain and fury and hatred and revenge. Within seconds, Victorias hands were around the photographer’s throat. She made a panicked noise, which was quickly cut off by Victoria. She used the momentum to hurl the photographer against the brick wall behind her. A dull thud resounded as her head cracked against the bricks. The photographer’s eyes were wide and rolling with fear. She scratched at Victorias hands with sharp nails, but Victoria couldn’t feel it.

Then there was another shout and arms came around her, trying to loosen her grip. She heard her name frantically snapped in her ear and when she would not let go, a knee drove against her leg from behind, finding a weak spot of nerves that reacted automatically without any input from her conscious brain. Victoria dropped, finally releasing the photographer who sank to her knees, coughing and rubbing her neck. Maxwell went to the photographer, murmuring softly. Now it was Victoria would couldn’t breathe; she felt the roiling hatred in her throat as if she might open her mouth to find a stream of darkness flying out of her. The adrenaline slammed into her and she started to shake. Drake had her though, his arms encircled her, and despite the rage, she had exhibited he stroked her face gently, speaking to her like she was a wild creature who needed placating. In some sense she was.

“You crazy bitch!” the photographer cried in a raspy voice. Victoria didn’t move. “What the fuck is wrong with you!”

“I think it might have had something to do with you spying on her and setting her up,” Drake replied with a snarl. “That kind of stuff tends to mess with a person, don’t you think?”

“Screw you.” Came the reply as the photographer shoved Maxwell away. Her bag was on the floor, and as she reached for it, Maxwell made a snap decision and kicked it across to Victoria. She finally looked up at him as she grabbed the bag. “No! That’s mine!”

Victoria straightened up, glad for Drakes presence at her side in case her legs gave out. They were still shaking so hard. “No, you don’t get to have privacy right now,” she said and upended the bag.

The photographer made a soft mewl of dismay as her things tumbled to the ground in the alley. A small camera landed by Victorias foot, a compact mirror cracked nearby. Lipstick fell and rolled across the alley. A phone landed screen down on the ground. A Gucci wallet plopped to the ground next to a tampon in its plastic wrapper. It was fairly standard purse detritus, but Victoria tossed the bag aside and dipped down to retrieve the camera. She switched it on and went to the last photograph. There was Victoria standing tall, her face a mask of stoicism. Victoria looked up, the red mist clouding her vision once again. “You like taking shots of me, do you? Is that how you pay your way?”

“The tabloids all want interesting pictures of you.” the photographer replied, lifting her chin. “They pay well, yes.”

Victoria felt a flare of fury and in one harsh movement, she pitched the camera hard. It smashed against the wall and died. The photographer let out a howl.

“How could you—”

“How could _you_?” Victoria roared, advancing on the photographer again. She cowed behind Maxwell and Drake hovered right by Victoria just in case. “You were part of the setup! You were lying in wait, ready to take photos of a sexual assault so you could sell them to the papers and ruin my life. How could you do that to me?” Angry, fat tears splashed over her lashes but her face remained hot and righteous. “How could you?”

The photographer glanced to the men as if seeking help or questioning if they were going to do anything to hold Victoria back. Drake met her eyes and stepped deliberately aside. He would not be helping her. Maxwell turned back to the photographer who was hiding behind him.

“You behaved pretty badly towards Victoria.” He said calmly. “She had a right to be angry. But if you tell us who hired you to set Victoria up we’ll let you go. Right?” He asked glancing back to Drake. Drake shrugged.

“Maybe.”

The photographer flickered her gaze to each in turn and she shrank back from the intensity of Victorias ire when she came to her. “OK, look, I never met the people who hired me. I swear!”

“What do you have then?” Drake asked.

“If I could get my phone I can send you a copy of the receipt for payment,” she said gesturing gingerly to her phone. Drake turned and swept it up.

“Here. Should still work.” Drake shrugged. “You better hope it does at least.”

With a grimace, she started up the device and despite a crack along one side it did seem to respond to her fingertips. Maxwell peered over her shoulder. “Send it to me,” he suggested, giving her his email address. Victoria was starting to feel the strain on her legs that bolting in heels had caused as the adrenaline was wearing off. She was still shivering and now she started to feel cold as well, but she would be damned if she would show it.

Maxwell pulled out his phone to check he had received the email and it was legit and when he nodded, Victoria finally stepped back.

Drake took charge. “Go on, get your stuff and get going.” He said. “And if I see you anywhere near Victoria again I’ll throw you out myself.”

She hurriedly gathered up her things and left the alley without a second glance. As soon as she was out of sight, Victoria felt the strength leave her legs and she sank to her knees in the alleyway. Drake and Maxwell both followed her, concern on their faces. “I wanted to kill her,” Victoria said flatly. Maxwell glanced at Drake, unsure of what to do. Drake wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

“Maxwell, go back to the dinner and find Bertrand,” Drake said, taking charge again. “Let him know what we’ve found.”

“What about you guys?” Maxwell asked.

“She’s freezing,” Drake said. “And she’s had a shock. I’m taking her for a drink. That ok with you, Quinn?”

Victoria nodded jerkily. As long as she wasn’t going back to that dinner she didn’t care. Drakes arm felt sturdy around her shoulders. That was what she was focused on. “Yeah, that’d be nice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter titles is Rage and Romance by Bressie. 
> 
> Olivias back and I'm so happy; I love her so much and writing her is brilliant, especially after book 1 when she isn't fighting the MC for Liam's hand in marriage. 
> 
> And Victoria gets to face down one of her demons in meeting the photographer she loathes so much and maybe went a bit too far. Or maybe she could have gone further if Drake hadn't stopped her.


	8. I'm Not Okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria lets Drake in a little more and accusations are made. 
> 
> **cw: discussion of past violence**

_Because I’m telling you the truth, I mean this, I’m okay!_

Drake was doing his best to portray an outward sense of calm and composure, but he was getting concerned about her. Victoria was mutely following him as he lead her from the alley and away from restaurant where she had chased after the photographer. She was downcast, hardly responding when he asked her where she wanted to go. In the end he found a small bar and pulled her inside, finding a quiet spot at the back of the building. He sat her down at a table and headed off to get drinks, keeping her always in sight. She was still shaking, though less than before. He had fled after her so fast that he had left his jacket behind so he had nothing to offer her to warm her up.

Drake went back to their table with two beers and two whiskey chasers. Victorias hand curled around the chaser first and she knocked it back in one gulp before Drake was even sat down. He wanted to ask her how she was, but something stilled his voice. He wasn’t sure if it was the rage that had burned off her before or the gloom that was hanging over her now, but he got the strong sense that she might not take well to questions at this moment. Drake took a sip of his own whiskey, the liquid warming him from the inside.

“I wanted to kill her.” Victoria finally said in a very quiet voice. Drake set his drink down and rested his arms across the table.

He said easily: “You couldn’t kill anyone.”

Victoria looked down at the table for a long time and then finally raised her head, ever so slowly. Drake felt a chill douse his back as she met his eyes. In that moment he understood what she was holding back, some of what she had alluded to back in Fydelia when she’d given a glimpse into her past. Her eyes were dark and sombre and behind them he could see the truth.

“Oh,” he said simply. There didn’t seem to be much else to say.

“My hands were around her neck,” Victoria said. “I _could_ have killed her. I wanted to. I was so angry. I had to hold back from squeezing.” Victoria lifted her hands so she could see them, palm up on the table. They were pretty small hands, Drake thought. They didn’t seem like hands that could crush the life out of a kitten, let alone an adult woman. “I saw Jimmy strangle someone to death one time.” She went on, not exactly directing her words at Drake. She seemed to just be talking softly on her own in agonisingly sorrowful tones. Drake watched not daring to move. “A prospect lost a parcel of coke and Jimmy pretended he was OK with it, that mistakes happened to everyone and it would be fine if he just knew the whole story. And the guy, he was only a kid really, he believed him so he told Jimmy everything about how that cocaine got lost until there was nothing left to say and he looked so relieved that Jimmy was being so understanding. And then Jimmy grabbed him and slammed him headfirst into the table and then…” Her fingers curled up like dead leaves as her voice trailed off. Drake reached over and pressed his palms over hers, so she ended up wrapping her fingers around his hands. Victoria looked up and met his gaze again. “I can still remember the way his eyes bulged. In terror at first and then because he couldn’t close them. The noises he made… thank you for stopping me.”

Drake nodded. He had turned the corner and seen Victoria clutch at the woman's neck, but he hadn’t really been worried. And sure, Victoria had been reluctant to release her, but she had a red haze obscuring her common sense. It happened to everyone at some point, or so Drake believed. He had certainly felt similar rage when he had found Tariq on Victoria back at Applewood Manor. He couldn’t judge her for giving in to rage. Given the tiny glimpse he had just gotten into Victorias life before she had left home, Drake felt she was incredibly stable.

All that aside, he believed her when she spoke of her fear at going too far.

They sat in the quiet for a short while. Drake had that night in his head again and a gnawing sense of guilt was creeping in as it did when he remembered that night. “Hey, Quinn? I’m really sorry about that night at Applewood.”

She looked at him with a quizzical face. Drake sighed wearily. “I should have gone after Tariq after I knew you were alright and I didn’t. I should have gone to his room and asked him why he’d done what he did. I keep thinking about it; Tariq was never a very forthright guy and hopeless with women. He would never make the first move and I’ve never known him to be so… handsy. But I didn’t go after him, I just went back to my room. I was too wrapped up in…”

“In us?” Victoria offered when Drake seemed to run out of words. Drake felt his cheeks heat up.

“I guess so.” He said. It was about then that Drake realised that they were still holding hands over the table and he quickly released her, pulling his hands back to his tankard of beer. Victoria watched his hands retreat with a look on her face… was that regret? Drake took a long sip to distract himself.

Victoria brushed her hair off her neck and starting absentmindedly twisting the locks over her shoulder. Drake felt his eyes slide to her exposed neck and the small flicker of her pulse. An image leapt unbidden to his mind of him pressing his lips down onto that very spot. Stop it, he scolded himself. It was getting to be a habit of him finding her in the middle of some traumatic experience and then lusting after her afterwards. It didn’t make him feel like a very good man.

“How are you doing?” He asked to shake the thoughts. “I mean with everything going on I guess I never really stopped to make sure that what happened with Tariq didn’t traumatise you.”

Victoria shrugged. “I’m alright. I mean, it could have been worse. I know I got off lightly. Kissing and groping is bad enough, don’t get me wrong, but it’s not like I was raped. I don’t think he intended to do anything unless I was willing; though he certainly seized his opportunity rather than waiting for consent. I guess that letter sent on my behalf made him think I was ready and willing.” Victoria let go of her spool of hair and it untwisted, bouncing back around her neck. “When I meet whoever arranged that letter I will be sure to thank them.” She added darkly.

“You and me, both,” Drake said, and Victoria snapped her gaze to his with a smile. “Er, and Liam of course. And everyone on your team. You know you aren’t alone in this, right?”

“I know,” Victoria sighed. “Doesn’t mean I’m not lonely. Don’t get me wrong,” she said with a long sip of her beer. “I’m grateful to all of you, but this is happening to me, not you guys. If we can’t fix it then the rest of you just carry on and I have to figure out how to live with this lie over my head.” She looked away. “I keep thinking how big this task is. I don’t know if I’m up for it, or if we can do it. A big part of me just wants to call it quits now and go back to the States. Do my old trick of starting over somewhere new.”

“Don’t go,” Drake said without thinking. She looked back at him, and there was that question in her eyes again that she’d worn the night he’d thrown Tariq out. Drake swallowed. “You’d be missed.”

“By who?” Victoria said. “You’d all carry on as normal. Liam would get married and start that family he’s always wanted. The Beaumonts would fix their finances without me. And you—”

“I would miss you,” Drake said. His heartbeat was deafeningly loud. He was sure she could hear it.

Victoria considered him for a long time, then reached back across the table and found his hand, pulling it away from his beer and entwining her fingers through his. Drake stared down at her hand ensnaring his so absolutely and it took everything he had not to climb over the table and pull her into his arms and kiss that spot on her neck. It would have been so easy to say screw everyone else and just carry her away. She seemed like she wanted that, too. Could she? He knew now was a perfect time to find out if only he could let go.

Instead, Drake tugged his hand loose and hid both hands under the table. “Don’t.” He said quietly. “I can’t.”

“Why not?” Victoria asked. She wasn’t going to let him get off that easily. “What’s stopping you?”

“I…” Drake started, but he didn’t know how to answer that satisfactorily. “I know Liam’s engaged, but he loves you. And you love him. I’m just… a distraction.” He looked up and met her eyes. “You don’t want me, you want to feel a little less lonely.”

Victoria’s eyes flashed with anger. “Don’t tell me what I want.” She snapped.

They lapsed into an uneasy silence, the space between them full of unspoken, spiky things. Drake was at war inside. He wanted her, God knew he wanted her. And she didn’t belong to Liam, who was, as he rightly said, engaged to another woman. There wasn’t really anything stopping them now, not like before when Liam was courting her and was ready to offer her everything.

But he couldn’t do it. Victoria was too important to risk and that was what he couldn’t shake. She was broken down and sad and he couldn’t be trusted with her fragile confidence. Drake knew he acted big and tough and like nothing ever bothered him, but he was scared of being the one to protect her through this murky swamp of false stories and the sharp teeth of the nobility.

And then there was his pride. The truth was that she did love Liam. That much was clear and had been for a long time. She adored him completely, even now with him having helped to break her she still loved him. Drake didn’t want to be a placeholder or second best. If she chose him, that would be different but this felt like a way to forget her sorrow for a short while. Drake didn’t think much of himself, but he was worth more than that. He _had_ to believe that, even if holding back from Victoria upset her.

“I’m here for you,” Drake said slowly, carefully. “But not like that. I’m your friend and I care about you. So tell me what I can do to help and I’ll do it. But not like that.”

Victoria sank her forehead onto her palm as she leaned on her elbow on the table. “God Drake, I’m sorry. I’m a monster.”

“Hey, no, don’t do that.” Drake chided gently. “You’re under a lot of stress right now. It’s fine.”

Her eyes were closed, that much he could see. She just sat in this position for a few moments, then seemed to steel herself and Victoria raised her head with a wan smile. “You can help me by taking my mind off my shitshow of a life. Tell me something about you.”

Drake couldn’t help the wry grin that spread over his face. “Walls, Quinn.” He reminded her. “A man needs his walls.”

“A man might need his walls, but a woman is sad and is asking very nicely.” Victoria retorted, looking a little more like her usual self again. Drake chuckled.

“Fine.” He said. “What do you want to know?”

Victoria mulled it over for a moment. “Tell me about your dad. I want to know what a good one is like. Please.”

Talking about his dad was easy enough, although the hurt around his death was always lingering. Drake smiled automatically as his fathers face loomed in his mind. “Dad was tough and honest. He had a really firm way of handling things, you know? When dad told you to do something you did it, not because you’d be in trouble if you didn’t, but because he was always looking out for everyone, so you just wanted to help out back. He was pretty high up in the King’s Guard, so he was very busy, but he always found time for us. Me and mom and Savannah.” Drake smiled wistfully. “I wish you could have met him. He’d have liked you.”

Victoria smiled back at him. “You really looked up to him, huh?”

“Yeah,” Drake replied softly.

“But you didn’t want to follow in his footsteps and join the Kings Guard?”

“No,” Drake explained. “I have no desire to follow the nobles around and protect them. I’d do anything for Liam of course, but I’m not interested in joining the Kings Guard.”

“So you just what? Hang out professionally at the palace?” Victoria asked. “Just sulking at fancy parties and complaining about the tiny portions of food? There must be more to it than that. I think you would have left a long time ago if that were the case.”

Drake finished his beer and peered at Victoria. “I did leave, actually. Once. For a while.”

Her eyes widened. “You did?”

He nodded. “Yeah, when I got older I thought it was time to make it on my own.” Drake leaned back on his chair. “I went to college.”

“Wow,” Victoria said looking impressed. “You really were out on your own.”

“Exactly,” Drake nodded along as she got it straight away. “Away from court, just me. Being an adult, or close enough. I was eighteen and Liam was busier than ever, being introduced at court. The only downside was that we started to drift apart.” Drake hesitated at the next part, where the story took a turn. Victoria seemed to sense his reticence to continue.

“What happened?” She asked carefully.

Drake looked up to meet her gaze. It was still hard to talk about. “That was a tough time for Cordonia. There was an assassination attempt on the royal family.”

He saw the terror strike through her to think of this. She didn’t know the details, had no knowledge of the specifics, but immediately she was quite obviously concerned for Liam. “Oh God…” she said in a strangled voice. “Was anyone hurt?”

“No, the Kings Guard stepped in before it came to that,” Drake said. “Liam was pretty shaken up though. I think it was the first time since his mom died that he came close to that part of being royalty.”

Victoria frowned, her eyes creasing with sorrow for Liam. “He never mentioned this to me.”

“I don’t think he likes to think about it much. He, er, he had some troubles after that.”

Victoria leaned forward as if she could glean information faster if she was closer to him. Her hand was at her neck as she listened. Drake wasn’t quite sure how they’d managed to get onto this topic, but he felt torn to continue. This wasn’t really his story to tell, but maybe it was something she needed to know about. Both he and Liam had spent the better part of a year warning her to be careful without giving much detail. Drake decided to press on as hard as it was. “Liam seemed fine to most people, but Leo came by my dorm one right. He’d chartered the private jet to get to me without delay.”

“He wanted you to come back?” Victoria asked, again following his trail very closely. Drake nodded.

“He was worried about Liam. Behind closed doors he was distant, he wasn’t eating, wasn’t sleeping. He was a mess, to be honest.” Drake looked down. “After I saw him I never went back to college. Things were bad… he needed me.”

“You gave up your whole life for him,” Victoria said.

Drake shrugged. “He’d lost his armour. He hadn’t been hurt in the attempt, but he was still damaged by it. And you know court, you’ve seen how cruel the nobles can be. How could I leave him alone to face them? Don’t get me wrong, he’s the best king Cordonia could hope for; he cares for the people and he wants to make sure they are all taken care of. He can play the game with the other nobles, but his heart isn’t in it.”

Victoria considered him for a while. “You didn’t even think about it, did you? When you saw how bad things were for Liam? You just dropped everything for him. You’re a good man, Drake Walker.”

Drake swallowed hard. It was too uncomfortable to sit with this praise heaped upon him. All he’d done was be there for his friend, it was hardly a big deal. Liam had been there for him when his dad died, after all, kept him a place at the palace with Savannah. “He’s my best friend,” Drake said simply.

*

They walked back to the train without speaking much. Neither had been interested in another drink after they finished their first round so they’d headed back instead. Victoria felt the chill on her bare arms. Stupid really that she hadn’t taken a coat or a shawl or anything warm, but she hadn’t expected to leave the restaurant without there being a car outside. Still, despite the cold, she relished the walk. She had learned more about Liam in that conversation that she had expected, and yet that seemed silly in retrospect. Drake didn’t like talking about himself much and whenever possible had always steered the conversation back to Liam. Victoria thought about the comment she’d made to Liam back at the Regatta; how each man enthused about the other. They were closer than brothers, that much was clear and they loved each other. And neither felt they were worthy of the friendship of the other. It was strange to hear them saying the same things about each other and neither realising just how worthy they actually were. Victoria considered the pair: the prince and the commoner, two best friends. They seemed so different, but they weren’t deep down and that was the heart of their friendship. When it came to it they were cut from the same cloth. Both loyal, honest men who valued the same traits in others. It was no surprise really that she had feelings for both of them, she thought with a hidden sigh. She had been sure of what she wanted at the Coronation Ball. Drake had scared her, too much like her, too fiery and quixotic. Liam had been steady and sure and reliable. Only then Liam had let her fall and Drake was the one picking up the pieces. It was all too much for a woman to deal with, she decided, especially on top of everything else.

They entered the train when they reached it and headed through to the Beaumonts carriages. As they approached, they could both hear raised voices and with a shared glance, Victoria pressed ahead to find Maxwell being accosted by Olivia. Drake made a noise of surprise to see her, whereas Victoria went over to the pair and stepped in between them both.

“Hey, hey!” She said cutting through the noise. “What's the problem?”

“What are you doing back?” Drake sneered at Olivia before either she or Maxwell could speak. Olivia rounded on him with a stern glare.

“Helping Victoria, obviously.” She retorted.

“No, we’re helping Quinn.” Drake snapped back. “We don’t need your kind of help.”

“Drake, she’s helping,” Victoria said firmly. Drake looked at her with surprise in his eyes and his mouth opened as if to argue, but instead, he snapped it shut and crossed his arms, fixing a glare on Olivia. “What’s going on here?” Victoria asked again.

“I have a lead that could potentially be connected to the blackmailer,” Olivia said.

Maxwell raised his arms in consternation. “For some reason, she seems to think I had something to do with it.”

Victoria turned with a frown. “No, Olivia, that can’t be right.”

Olivia reached into her purse. “I was waiting to run this by you, but you apparently had better things to do than investigate your own blackmail.”

“I was pursuing a different lead, actually,” Victoria responded mildly. Olivia huffed and pulled out a small envelope.

“Did you know that some photographs almost made the press back at the start of the season?” Olivia asked ignoring everyone else. “Photos of you and Liam from New York?”

“I did,” Victoria said, her gaze flicking to Drake, who was gaping again.

“How did _you_ know?” Drake asked. “Bastien stopped them before they got to the press.”

Olivia fixed him with a darkly proud look. “I am a Nevrakis. I get what I want.”

“Thank goodness you’re on our side,” Victoria said lightly, but she meant it. Having Olivia on her team was far better than the alternative. Olivia smiled proudly, but then returned to the envelope that she handed over to Victoria.

“Take a look at these shots.” She moved around so that she was standing beside Victoria to point out the contents. Drake moved up to the other side of Victoria to look, too. “There’s you and Liam dancing. Drake and Liam. You and Liam again. See how in these two you can see Tariq in the background?”

Victoria leafed through the photos. They were relatively good quality, nothing grainy even though the lighting in the club wasn’t the best for clear shots. These weren’t taken from a distance with a zoomed in camera. These were taken from nearby. Victoria followed Olivias pointing finger to where Tariq was chatting with a woman in the background of Drake and Liam laughing. She flipped to the next shot. It was her and Liam on the sofa talking. She’d swapped her shoes by then and they were talking about freedom. She could remember it so clearly looking down at the shot. The next was her and Liam dancing; the photographs must not have been in order. She could see Liam leaning down to her, a small smile on his lips. His hand was on her waist and she was turned away from him, pretending she wasn’t as into him as she had been. Her stomach lurched as she perused the images. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Olivia was speaking so Victoria snapped her head back to the present.

“Sorry, what?”

“Maxwell?” Drake was saying, turning to him. “You took these?”

“What?” Victoria asked again, bewildered by what she had missed.

“He’s the only one not featured in a single photograph,” Olivia said flatly. “Then suddenly these are heading for print with a tidy pay-out for the photographer.”

“Maxwell, what the hell?” Drake asked, his voice rising.

Maxwell looked like a rabbit caught in a spotlight. “What did I do?”

“You’re connected to the blackmailer.” Olivia asserted. Maxwell’s eyes almost popped out of his head.

“No, I’m not!” He squeaked in alarm.

Victoria turned back to Drake and Olivia who were practically wearing matching angry expressions. “Guys, there must be more to the story than this. Maxwell wouldn’t sell me out.”

At that point, the carriage opened and Bertrand stepped in, speaking with Justin. The latter looked up and with a start took in the scene. “I’ll, er, leave you to it.” He said, ducking immediately back out and shutting the door. Bertrand stepped up slowly beside his brother. “Is everything in order? Victoria, I have some news about that receipt—”

“Bertrand, did you know Maxwell tried to sell out Liam and Victoria?” Drake interrupted. Bertrand frowned.

“What?”

“I don’t think that’s right—” Victoria started, but Olivia spoke over her.

“Victoria, I told you not to trust them,” she said.

“How much did they pay you?” Drake snarled. “And what did you blow it on, because you damn well didn’t spend a penny of it on Victoria, did you?”

Victoria reached over and touched her hand to his arm. “Now, Drake—”

“I didn’t!” Maxwell shouted, looking close to tears. “Drake, you know I wouldn’t do that.”

“I know—” Victoria tried, turning back to Maxwell to try to comfort him.

“Tell us about the blackmailer!” Olivia shouted. “Start talking right this minute.”

“You betrayed Liam,” Drake exclaimed. “You betrayed Victoria!”

“Stop!” Victoria turned in surprise to the voice. Bertrand was breathing hard after his cry, but couldn’t seem to look at anyone. He stepped around his brother and spoke quietly in a voice full of shame. “It wasn’t Maxwell. I sold the photographs of the bachelor party to the papers.”

“Bertrand!” Maxwell cried. “Why? How could you do that?”

“Start talking, Beaumont,” Drake said with a low growl. Olivia kept her mouth shut, but crossed her arms and stared dangerously at Bertrand.

Victoria couldn’t bring herself to speak. She hadn’t actually believed that Maxwell could have been responsible, but neither could she fathom Bertrand’s confession.

“I don’t have any excuses, but the reason was money,” Bertrand said sombrely. “I had no faith in you, Lady Victoria, which is my eternal shame. Maxwell had chosen you and I believed you would fail. That you would bring embarrassment down on House Beaumont. That this would herald in the ruin of our once great family. I decided the only course of action would be to recoup my losses where I could so I found the photographs.”

“You went through my phone?” Maxwell gaped, sounding scandalised. Bertrand nodded sadly.

“I did. I’m sorry Maxwell.” Bertrand said. “You told me how close Victoria and the then-prince had been that night so I knew there would be something the papers could use.”

“Yeah, it’s all very well being sorry to Maxwell for going through his phone,” Drake said darkly. “But what you tried to do to Victoria and Liam was worse.”

“I know,” Bertrand said nodding at Drakes assessment. “Victoria, I don’t expect your forgiveness or understanding. What I did was unforgivable and I will always be deeply ashamed of my actions. If it’s any solace at all, I did this before I grew to know you and came to believe in you.”

“Another mistake by the oh so illustrious Duke Ramsford.” Drake spat.

“It would appear so.” Bertrand agreed mournfully.

“I’m sorry, too,” Maxwell said. “I wanted to make a scrapbook of the season for Liam and I thought those were some nice shots.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Maxwell,” Bertrand asserted.

Victoria looked down at the photos in her hand. She could practically feel the anger rolling off Drake in waves and the suspicions of Olivia on the other side of her. Looking down at the shot of her dancing with Liam she just felt sad again that the people in that photo had lost what they had discovered that night with each other. Everything was so messed up now. Victoria smiled sadly at Maxwell. “They are really nice photos.” She turned to Olivia. “Can I keep hold of them? If you don’t need them anymore?” Olivia gave a curt nod. “Thanks.” Then Victoria stepped towards Bertrand and wordlessly wrapped her arms around him. “I know why you did what you did. It wasn’t very nice, but I understand. And I forgive you.”

“You _do_?” Drake asked, askance.

“Foolish,” Olivia muttered.

Maxwell joined the members of his house by throwing his arms around them both. From inside the huddle, Bertrand said in a small voice: “You never cease to amaze me Victoria.”

“I know.” She said.

“I still think you’re crazy to trust them,” Olivia said bluntly, not caring who heard. Victoria stepped out of the hug.

“Olivia? Thank you for bringing this to my attention, even if it isn’t connected to the blackmailer. I’m really glad you’re part of the team.” Victoria said. “But listen, all of you. Every person in this room has my absolute trust.” She looked around from one to the other. “You may not all always get along with each other, but as far as I’m concerned I trust you guys. And Hana.” She remembered to add the final member of her group. “You guys and Hana.”

“And Liam.” Maxwell put in cheerfully. Victoria looked down at the photograph in her hand. Did she trust Liam? She wanted to agree with Maxwells input, but she hesitated. Could she trust him? Everyone in this room was trying to clear her name, along with Hana. Liam couldn’t give her the same help, she understood that. But she had tried even so to be there for him and be his friend and she’d been shut out in the cold again. He’d broken her already brittle heart. She looked up.

“Maybe someday,” she said quietly.

Maxwell looked pained. “Well, he wanted me to give you this anyway.” Maxwell reached into his pocket and handed her a sealed letter. Victoria took it automatically but tried to hand it back at once. “He wants to meet you, he said. To talk.”

“I can’t,” Victoria said, in a strained voice. Maxwell looked at her with a broken expression.

“Please don’t make me give this back to him.” He said softly. “He’s really missing you.”

This was apparently more than Olivia could stomach. “Well, if there’s nothing else for me to do, I’ll take my leave. See you around, Victoria.” And she swept out of the carriage.

“I’ll go update Justin,” Bertrand said stiltedly. _Great_ , Victoria thought, _how many people can I make uncomfortable right now?_

Victoria was still holding out the letter and Maxwell was rooted to the floor, unwilling to take it back. Drake sighed and grabbed it. “I’ll take it. I need to see him anyway.”

“Thank you, Drake,” Victoria replied gloomily. “I think I’ll just go to bed.” Still clutching the photographs, she retreated to her sleeping quarters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for the chapter is by My Chemical Romance. 
> 
> It's a fine balance of trying to stay true to the story and weave in the dark backstory of my MC. As ever, if anyone thinks there need to be more content warnings or anything, please let me know. I'm definitely open to feedback.
> 
> In the game, I always did the little extras with Liam and my MC, but despite how sweet many of them are and the insights you get into Liam many of them don't fit with my fic, so sadly I have to leave them out. No romantic secret coves with pearls for Victoria!


	9. Use Once and Destroy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Madeleines hen do kicks of some pretty big feelings in Victoria.

_It might as well it might as well hurt_

“Hey,” Liam heard the greeting, which despite its shortness was easily recognisable as Drake and he turned around with a smile for his friend.

“Drake.” He greeted him warmly, but his heart was sinking. Not because Drake was here, he could never be sorry to see his best friend, but because he knew at that moment that Victoria was not coming.

Drake came up alongside him, hands firmly wedged in his pockets and they stood side by side looking over the water. The waves were gently washing over the shore with a sigh as they retracted again each time. Liam watched the moonlight dapple on the water. It looked so peaceful. “How is she?”

Drake shifted on the sand. “Well, they found another clue today. She chased down the photographer and convinced her to hand over some evidence. Bertrand was looking into it. Oh, and it turns out that he was behind those photographs that almost leaked from your bachelor party. Maxwell took the photos in innocence, but Bertrand tried to make some money off them.”

“Really? Bertrand?” Liam asked, his brow furrowed. “That’s concerning.”

“Nah, Quinn forgave him,” Drake said, quirking his shoulders in a shrug. “Olivia is back, did you know? She’s working with Quinn.”

“How does Victoria feel about that?” Liam wanted to know. He knew that the two women hadn’t seen eye to eye on everything during the season.

“Apparently pretty good,” Drake said. “I’m not thrilled, but I don’t doubt that Olivia gets results and she had resources we sorely need.”

Liam nodded. Victoria was working so hard to uncover the conspiracy against her and what was he doing? He had people watching her and was keeping up the impossible pretence of being happy with Madeleine, but it didn’t feel like much. He’d planned an evening away from it all for that night, a chance to maybe explain the reasons behind his leaving her asleep, a way to apologise. When he’d seen her earlier he hadn’t even noticed the beautiful dress at first. He had been too taken with the woman and how she made him feel. But she had turned to him and her blue eyes had been cold. She was pulling away from him. He couldn’t be surprised that she had chosen to stay away tonight. He turned to Drake. “Did she at least read the letter?”

Drake winced and pulled out his hand, holding the still sealed envelope. “Sorry, Liam.”

Liam took it and turned it over in his hands. The sight of the crumpled note, the wax seal unbroken made him want to cry like a little boy. “I’ve really lost her, haven’t I?”

Drake sighed. “I don’t know what to tell you. You said if she wanted to leave that you’d let her go.”

“That was then.” Liam fixed Drake with a look of desperation. “I thought I could handle this. I can’t. I love her, Drake. I can’t stand being near Madeleine. She might even be perfectly guilt-free in this conspiracy, but I look at her and I blame her.”

“You’ll find out eventually who’s to blame,” Drake said.

“Even if Madeleine is unconnected,” Liam said hoarsely. “She’s relishing this too much. How anyone can spend so much energy on a charade of a happy engagement I don’t know. It hurts to be near her.”

Drake cast his gaze around the beach, that was empty. “Liam, you can’t talk so freely here.”

“No-one’s around. I dodged Bastien.” Liam replied. He’d put every effort into sneaking away alone. Drake was the only person who knew him well enough to be able to figure out where he went and the note had left instructions for Victoria. Instructions she had not read. Another pang at his heart. “Drake, I can’t keep this up. It’s bad for me and bad for Victoria.”

“But,” Drake said carefully. “If you do anything rash you could ruin everything. Quinn is fighting so hard to clear her name. You can’t mess with that.”

Liam leaned his head back, exhaling in a long breath. “I know. I know.” He turned away from the sea and started back up the beach, the letter in his hand. Then he stopped and looked down at it. He needed to get rid of the note. Nothing could be left where it could be discovered. Liam turned back to the sea and headed to the water. Tearing open the envelope, he pulled out the letter and started to rip it to tiny pieces. Each small hope he had poured into the fewest sentences possible, the letter was sparsely written. He’d hoped to talk things over in person, but that was not to be. The tiny morsels of paper fluttered over the sea, that hungrily swallowed them. They’d be swept out into the expanse of ocean or they would dissolve. Either way, he was protecting her. That was the important thing.

“I have to get back to the train,” Drake said quietly. “We’re setting out soon for the next stop. Do you know what it is?”

Liam looked over at Drake who had a guarded expression on his face. “Not really.”

“Well, it’ll be hell on Quinn.”

Liam stared down at the sand. “It’s all hell on Victoria.”

*

How had she gotten here?

Madeleine was in her element bossing around her ladies in waiting and the staff at the magazine Trend. Of course, Madeleine knew Ana de Luca. Of course, she was having a massive photoshoot and interview for her bachelorette party. Of course, Victoria was expected to smile and pose alongside the others when inside she just wanted to go to bed. The bunk in her sleeping carriage on the train wasn’t large, but it was cosy enough and as long as it had a blanket for her to hide underneath it would do. That would have to wait.

Victoria couldn’t even hide in her head; she’d let Justin talk her into wearing an earpiece. His voice murmured in her ear every now and again as he overheard the directions. She and Kiara were wearing gold dresses for the shoot, while Penelope and Hana were in silver. Madeleine was in white. Not her actual bridal gown, but she wore a selection of different classy white gowns so she would stand out amongst the metallic dresses her ladies were wearing. An assistant for Ana de Luca found her a bouquet so they could really amp up the bridal theme. Victoria felt like she might be sick, but she stood next to Madeleine when directed and beamed a killer-watt smile as Justin coached her. It was all fake.

After photos Ana sat, the ladies down along one sofa and Madeleine in an armchair and she started the interview. Victoria suddenly learned a whole bunch of details she could have stood to never have heard about the wedding. They were going to recite the classic vows, Madeleine said. A wedding near Christmas was romantic and the colours would be silver and green to complement her house colours as well as the season. The food would be sourced from Fydelia and would be lavish. The music would be provided by the Philharmonic Orchestra from London to represent her father, who came from Britain.

Victoria sat through the questions as the other ladies cooed at Madeleines answers and remained in the same silent, still position as Justin gave commentary on each thing Madeleine said. She knew he was working for her, but he clearly respected the way Madeleine handled the press. Then again Madeleines questions were pretty easy.

Until they took a slight turn.

Ana leaned forward and looked conspiratorially at Madeleine. “Countess Madeleine, thank you for sharing your wedding plans with me. Now, tell me… why do you allow Lady Victoria to remain at court after everything that happened.”

Victoria's heart sank. There it was.

“Honestly?” Madeleine replied easily without so much as a glance at Victoria. “It’s water under the bridge.”

“Really?” Ana pressed. “The scandal, the pictures…none of that concerns you?”

Madeleine narrowed her eyes. “To be frank, Ms de Luca, the way the press has treated Lady Victoria and dragged her name through the mud has been nothing short of shameful.”

Justin made a surprised noise in her ear, but it was nothing compared to the face Victoria knew she was making. That was entirely unexpected. And Madeleine wasn’t finished.

“Furthermore, where is the outrage directed at Tariq?” Madeleine went on. “The media has been conspicuously silent on his role in the whole ordeal. Wouldn’t Cordonia be better served if the focus were on the bright future King Liam and I are building for our people?”

Ana looked rather taken aback. “You have… given me a lot to think about, Countess Madeleine.”

Victoria drew in a shaky breath. Beside her Hana lightly pressed her palm to Victoria's arm for a few seconds before Ana turned to the ladies to ask them questions about the event. Victoria barely heard them as her mind reeled from Madeleine's ire at the way the press had hounded Victoria. She turned her words over in her head. Madeleine had sounded sincere. That was what was so shocking. That and she had spoken out about the press directly to Ana de Luca whose magazine had run plenty of stories about Victoria over the season and then turned on her when the photos of her and Tariq had come out. That was pretty ballsy, Victoria had to admit.

“Lady Victoria,” Ana asked and she was snapped out of her thoughts. “How are you looking forward to the wedding?”

“You’ve got this, kid,” Justin murmured.

“It sounds like it’s going to be a phenomenal day,” Victoria managed. “Truly a wonderful end to a very important year for King Liam.”

“And will you be bringing a new beau for the occasion?” Ana asked, her eyes flickering to Victoria's face to catch every nuance of her reply.

“No,” Victoria said.

“I’m surprised, you were a hit during the social season,” Ana prompted. “A new face at court, an outsider, and such a charming one at that. You must have your pick of the men.”

“She’s trying to get you to admit something scandalous here,” Justin said, stating the obvious. “Tread carefully.”

“I…” Victoria cleared her throat. Drake appeared in her head. She couldn’t drag him into this, even as panic brought his name to her lips. She had no idea what to say. “That is…”

“Victoria will be too busy to worry about impressing men,” Madeleine said smoothly. “None of my ladies will be bringing a plus one. I need my ladies to be focused on me for just this event.” She gave a tinkling laugh. “After all, when else does a woman get to be the centre of attention but on her wedding day! I need everything to be perfect, which is why I’ve assembled the team that you see here.”

Ana laughed and turned back to Madeleine with some more questions. Victoria glanced at Hana who looked just as surprised. Had Madeleine just come to her rescue? This was a very strange day indeed.

*

Victoria didn’t get another chance to speak to Madeleine in relative privacy for the next couple of hours. After the photos and interview were finished the ladies headed for an exclusive club across town. At least Victoria understood the club; the tables turned somewhat and she was the one in her element amongst the women compared to all the balls she had experienced and courtly functions. Even Madeleine deferred to her when Victoria organised rounds of drinks and dancing. Olivia joined them and between the pair of them, Victoria was able to check each woman's card numbers (except Hanas, because no matter what anyone said Victoria refused to doubt her best friend) and was dismayed to find that none were a match with the number Bertrand had managed to glean from the receipt.

Madeleine was taking a short break from dancing to make a phone call, but the other women had attracted the attention of dancing partners. Victoria seized her moment and went over to where Madeleine was returning from her call with two hastily purchased drinks in hand. “Hey, Madeleine, you seem to like this pineapple cocktail so I thought I’d get one for you.”

Madeleine took the glass without thanks, but she did stop to drink it. The women were just outside the throb of the music, slightly removed from the other club-goers and not so deafened that they needed to shout.

“Madeleine?” Victoria started slowly. “I wanted to thank you for what you said to Ana de Luca before. I really appreciate your words.”

Madeleine gave Victoria a long look. “I’m sure it’s easier to assume that I hate you, Victoria, but I don’t. I never have. And I meant what I said. The papers have torn you to pieces and I would never wish that on anyone.” Madeleines eyes misted briefly.

“I suppose you have some experience with the tabloids.” Victoria put forth carefully. Madeleine snapped back to the present.

“Yes, I suppose,” Madeleine said. “Of course, Leo breaking our engagement was hardly my doing, whereas you…”

Victoria gritted her teeth. “Brought it on myself? Madeleine, I didn’t willingly do anything with Tariq.”

“Hmm, perhaps,” Madeleine said dismissively. “Nonetheless, you aren’t to blame for the position you found yourself in at court or with the papers. That was the Beaumonts doing and really they should have known better.” As she took in Victoria's confused expression she explained: “Bringing you here in the first place. You never belonged here and there was no way you would ever have become Queen. It just wasn’t possible, but they dangled this hope in front of you. Unfair, really. Almost cruel.”

Victoria dropped her gaze to the floor and swallowed. For some reason, this assessment of her situation was cutting to the bone tonight. “But that’s just it.” She replied finally, looking up again. “That’s what makes now so hard. It would be different if Liam hadn’t chosen me, but he did.”

“Did he?” Madeleine asked with a more considerate tone that Victoria would have expected.

“Well, he was going to,” Victoria said. From a small space in her brain, a voice asked her what the hell she was doing, spilling these secrets, but her mouth was running on automatic and she couldn’t seem to stop sharing. “He assured me that I was his choice and he would have said my name if… you know.”

Madeleine was looking at Victoria with a mixture of pity and condescension. “Oh Victoria. This is precisely what I mean. You’re too naive for this life. You can’t believe anything said in privacy if it isn’t backed up in public. Not with the King.”

Victoria felt a flash of anger, but there was a niggling feeling of doubt needling at her. “You’re wrong. It’s not about the King, it’s about Liam. He loves me.” That sounded so stupid and the minute the words left her she wanted to take them back. As that was impossible, she tried to press on. “That’s why this hurts so much. You do understand that, right? It hurts every moment of every day because the man I love and who loves me back is marrying you. And you don’t even want him.”

Madeleines face hardened. “I presume this declaration of love was accompanied by some form of…physical action?”

Victoria had never heard sex referred to in such roundabout terms, but she understood the phrasing perfectly. A blush spread over her face as she hesitated and Madeleine nodded.

“I suspected as much. Strange, really, that Liam gave you these lofty promises and then got something sweet in return, no?” Madeleine said plainly. “And yet when it came down to it, did he stand up before the court and demand you be released by his guard dog? Did he declare his love for you to the assembled? Or did he select a worthy contender to be his queen whilst you were removed from court?” Madeleine took a long sip of her drink and set down the empty glass. “Thank you for the beverage, Lady Victoria.”

Victoria stood rooted to the floor as Madeleine headed back to the dance floor and her ladies-in-waiting. She felt like she’d just swallowed acid. Every single thing Madeleine had said was giving voice to the clusters of fear and doubt that had been planted in her since the Coronation Ball. As if she’d just dumped a ton of fertiliser on them, these terrible feelings swelled and grew, crushing the hope and righteousness down so she could hardly hear them. Did Liam love her at all? That was the question. And also, was she stupid for staying here? He had allowed her to be dragged out of the ballroom in shame and he had left her alone after their last night together. He was engaged to someone else. He wasn't fighting for her. 

Victoria blindly placed her glass on the bar as she headed for the door.

As she tumbled out into the street and the chill air, Victoria realised with absolute clarity that she needed to see Liam, right now before the certainty could make a case against the doubt. She needed to know if she was being naive or not about his feelings. Even if there was nothing she could do about it, she needed to know if his love for her was real.

She didn’t know how to reach him. She couldn’t go and find his room because she didn’t know where he was. The train was her current moving abode, but he wasn’t on board; he and Madeleine were travelling separately on the tour. Victoria pulled out her phone and stared blankly down at it. She didn’t have his number. Victoria laughed as she suddenly had this realisation.

She didn’t have his phone number. She didn’t even know if he had a phone; certainly, she’d never seen him holding one. What else didn’t she know about him that in the real world she would already know? If they’d met a conventional way, she would have exchanged numbers with him. She’d know how old he was. She might have seen his date of birth in her research for Cordonia, but she couldn’t recall it. She didn’t even really know his name. She knew him as Liam. Just Liam. A memory bubbled up that the royal family were descended from an ancient line that had gone by the surname Rys, but was that his name? Or had it changed over the centuries as names were want to do? A useless memory from history class popped up to inform her that the British royal family had changed their name during the First World War to sound less Germanic. How was that helpful? The laughter bubbled over into tears as sometimes happens and Victoria started walking to avoid the concern of anyone who was watching the strange woman exit a club alone and start crying.

Victoria remembered with a flash that evening they had spent together at the Beaumonts estate. Her home. He had called it a date, but they had known each other by then so it hadn't felt like a first date. They hadn't treated it as such; they'd asked questions the like of which were asked on date fifteen or twenty. She'd skipped the first date questions, the basics. On their actual first date in New York she had taken him to the statue of Liberty and he had talked about freedom, but never given her any details of his life. Was that all she was to him? Freedom from the trappings of his royal lineage and eventual destiny? Was she ever truly a serious contender for the queen, for his wife, or was she always ever just a bit of fun on the side? 

Stumbling through her tears from the club, still staring down at her phone, Victoria knew she had to make a plan. Without thinking she felt her thumb tap and scroll until a number appeared and she pressed the call button before she realised what she was doing. It didn’t ring for long.

“Quinn?”

“I know I’m not supposed to be doing this,” Victoria said in a rush. “I know this is all wrong and Bertrand and Justin would wring my neck if they knew I was making a phone call like this, but I need to see him. Right now. But I don’t know how to get in touch with him. I don’t know—” she broke off with a sob. “I don’t know anything about him. Does he even have a phone number? I don’t know when his birthday is. I don’t know anything. What the hell is wrong with me?”

“Quinn, where are you?”

“I’m not sure. I just started walking.” Victoria stopped and looked around at the strange street signs.

“You left the party?”

“I had to. Madeleine said some things that got me thinking.”

“Christ, Quinn, you know you can’t trust anything she says. Hang on.” Drake went quiet for a moment and she could hear him talking to someone. She kept walking. There didn’t seem any reason not to keep moving. Maybe she could walk all the way out of Switzerland and into France if she kept going.

Drake returned to the call. “Quinn, listen, we’re making a call to someone to pick you up.”

“But you don’t know where I am.”

“Yeah, well, we have some idea,” Drake said with a sigh. “People are watching you so we’re going to get one of them to pick you up.”

Victoria went cold. She knew security detail was something always hanging around Liam, but not her. She immediately looked around as if suddenly these shadowy figures would emerge at once, but of course, no-one did. “No, Drake, I don’t like that.”

“You can’t go wandering around unfamiliar places in the dark by yourself.” Drake insisted. “In a foreign country no less where you don’t speak the language. Do you even have warm clothes on? It’s November, you must be freezing.”

As if he’d summoned it a bitter wind wrapped around her. “No, I’m fine.” She said through chattering teeth. “You know what, forget about it. This was dumb.”

“Quinn—”

“If you send people to get me, I’ll scream and run and fight them.” Victoria snapped, knowing how ridiculous that sounded, but she couldn’t bear the idea of being collected. Jimmy had used to send his guys to collect her when she strayed. None of them had ever mistreated her for fear of incurring Jimmy's wrath, but that didn’t mean the whole thing hadn’t been humiliating and belittling. “If you get people to collect me I will never trust you again. Forget about it.”

“Quinn, hang on,” Drake said, and as he moved away from the phone she heard him speak to the room. “Liam, wait—” was what he said. Victoria pulled the phone away from her face with a jerk and ended the call without thinking. She shoved it back in her purse and started to walk with purpose. She was gripped with the same fear she had felt as a teenager when she had tried to get away from Jimmy. Anyone could be a threat and she stuck out like a sore thumb in her stupid gold dress and heels. The tears kept coming, though she wiped them from her eyes with harsh sweeps of her hand. She needed to see clearly. That small voice was back asking her if she was sure this was the best course of action, but if she walked fast enough, she could outrun the voice. She heard a man’s voice around a corner and bolted across the road in a panic. She realised she was holding her arm with her hand where Bastien had bruised her the night of the ball when he’d hauled her out of there. It was all too much.

Up ahead she saw a late-night cafe and ducked into the light and warmth. Victoria dug into her purse for some Swiss francs and headed to the counter to buy a black coffee. Caffeine was probably the worst thing for her fraught nerves, but she needed a reason to be in the cafe. The cup shook in the saucer as she walked it to a booth and sat down to catch her breath.

If anyone came in to try to take her away she could scream and fight with witnesses; not only the woman at the counter but someone was bustling about in the back where she assumed the kitchen was. Quickly she googled how to say “Call the police” in Swiss. This proved more difficult than anticipated as she learned they spoke four different national languages and she’d been too distracted at the counter to acknowledge what the woman who served her had been speaking. With a start, she thought there was a chance the woman had even spoken to her in English as Victoria certainly hadn’t asked for a coffee in a different language.

With shaking hands Victoria took a quick drink of the hot coffee, burning her mouth in the process, but she couldn’t resist its comforting warmth. Her phone rang, causing her to jump, but she declined the call with a swipe. After a few moments it rang again and she switched it to silent. Both times it had been Drake and when it rang a third time, vibrating on the Formica tabletop, it was Drake again. She felt utterly stupid for having called him in the first place. The urge to see Liam had abated by now, though she still wanted answers. Victoria just hadn’t expected that he would be with Drake when she called. She supposed he was still with Drake now and they were both getting worried. This whole situation was pathetic and she could accept that her behaviour was not helping, but she couldn’t stop now. As she drank her coffee, her nerves still fraught, but common sense finally returning to her Victoria resolved to give it an hour and then she could figure out a taxi back to the train. Somehow. She started Googling Geneva to figure out the best language to use and how to call a taxi.

When her coffee was drained Victoria heard the door open and looked up to find not only Drake but Liam as well standing in the cafe. Her heart exploded in panic and her instinct was to bolt, but they were blocking the only exit. Victoria rose, backing away from the pair, wondering if she could get out through the kitchen to a back door. Reason had already fled and nothing but adrenaline remained.

“Quinn, hey,” Drake said, raising his hands to try to calm her as if she were some wild horse. Liam stood behind him silently. “Come on, it’s just us.”

Victoria had backed up as far as she could go, feeling the counter behind her. The woman who’d served her came back in from the kitchen and took in the scene. “Mam’selle, ça va?”

Liam dragged his eyes away from Victoria and stepped around Drake to speak to the woman in French. Victoria felt cornered; Liam was to her right, Drake by the door. Could she make it if she bolted? Did she want to?

At that thought, the feeling seemed to drain from her legs and she had to hold herself against the counter lest she fall. Running was stupid. _She_ was stupid. Victoria bowed her head, the fight and fear dissipating leaving shame in its place.

She walked to the table and picked up her purse. “OK, let’s go,” she muttered. Drake dropped his hands, concern etched on his features. Liam finished placating the woman and started to walk towards Victoria. Suddenly she couldn’t bear the idea of him touching her and she walked around Drake to leave the cafe. The men followed her outside.

“You didn’t have to come,” Victoria said mutely. She couldn’t seem to summon any emotion to her words. She was just too tired.

“You sounded upset,” Drake said. Liam looked pained on her behalf.

“Victoria, what happened?” he asked mournfully.

“I’m fine,” Victoria replied, refusing to look at either man. “I just got lost, but I figured out what to do in there.” She gestured weakly to the cafe. “I just panicked.”

“That much was clear,” Drake said bluntly. “I’m sorry I scared you.”

Victoria shrugged with an action that seemed to take several minutes to complete. “I don’t like being followed. Bad memories.” The trio lapsed into silence. Neither Drake nor Liam seemed to know what to do with this version of Victoria. Even with her head angled down, she caught their shared glance out of the corner of her eye. “Guys, I’m fine.” She said raising her heavy head. “Just tired.”

“Come on,” Drake said jerking his head to the side. “Let’s get going.” He turned and lead the way leaving Victoria to follow.

Liam hesitated then fell into step with her. Victoria automatically shrank away. “Victoria, what did Madeleine say to you?” Apparently, Liam was done waiting for her to start talking.

“Nothing.”

“Victoria…”

Victoria stopped in her tracks. This night would be nothing without the hot burn of fury igniting her from within. Her eyes flashed with anger. “She reminded me how foolish I’ve been, if you want to know, _Your Majesty_.” Liam stopped and turned to her, eyes full of regret. His body language seemed to suggest he would take whatever got thrown at him. “And she was right. What the hell am I still doing here? Following around you and your future wife across Europe while the papers try to find more dirt on me so they can carry on smearing my name. What the fuck is wrong with me?” Drake had stopped, but he wasn’t coming any closer to them. A big bundle of words swelled up inside her and burst out of her mouth: “You let them take me away.”

“I know,” Liam said in a thick voice, shame clouding his eyes.

“Did you ever love me?” Victoria asked the waver in her voice belying the tough facade she was attempting with her rage.

Liam met her gaze, lip trembling. “Of course I did. I do; I will _always_ love you.”

Victoria snapped, her body acting of its own accord. She flew at him, planting her palms on his chest and shoving. It was unexpected, which was the only reason he even took a step back. There was no contest of size; she was a full head smaller than him and he was built like a damn Greek God. Drake started towards them, looking around. “Quinn, don’t—”

“Step back!” Came a yell and Bastien appeared as if from nowhere. Liam turned to him.

“Bastien, don’t, it’s fine.”

Drake brushed past the pair and stood between them and Bastien. “Bastien, come on. She’s not a threat.”

Bastien's cold steel gaze landed on Victoria who glared back. “She struck the King.”

“Fuck you.” Victoria snapped, suddenly being face to face with the man who removed her causing another surge of rage. She balled up a fist and swung it towards him, but Drake and Liam both cried out in concern and stepped in. Drake turned to Victoria and took the hit, grabbing her wrist as Liam wrapped his arms around her arms.

“Let me go!” She screamed as Liam held her tight, hurriedly muttering in her ear. Both his voice and Drakes merged but the essential message got through: “don’t do this, this isn’t worth it, it’ll be OK.”

“That’s enough!” Bastien shouted through her cries and the hasty words of Drake and Liam. “I’m taking you away.”

Liam didn’t ease up on his hold, but his head whirled on Bastien. “Bastien, touch her and you’re fired.”

“We’ve got her,” Drake added.

“Stand down,” Liam ordered. Victoria felt herself deflate at their words. Liam had said exactly what she wished he’d said at the Coronation. Those words, right there, shot into the air like fireworks and broke her final piece of heart. Victoria dropped and burst into tears at the same time. Her hand slipped from Drakes grip as she sank, but Liam went with her, cradling her so she didn’t hurt herself. She turned into his chest and sobbed against him, her hand balling up the fabric of his shirt.

Drake was still talking to Bastien. “You’ve had an order from your King. We’ve got her.”

“One more toe out of line and you’re gone.” Bastien barked towards Victoria, but she barely heard him. Liam picked her up and stood, turning away from Bastien and carrying her away from the street to a waiting car where he and Drake climbed in, sitting either side of her in the back like sentinels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Hole, Use Once and Destroy. 
> 
> Ok, so yeah. This is where things go a bit more off-track canon wise for a time. I feel like I'm always saying that, but I definitely have some butterflies over this next chapter and section! 
> 
> Everybody is sad. Sorry!


	10. Almost Lover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria makes some decisions about her future.

_Well, I'd never want to see you unhappy_

They couldn’t go back to the train. Not with Liam in tow. The idea of Drake taking her back by himself didn’t seem to feature in the discussions of where to go next. Discussions Victoria played no part in. In the end, they went to the hotel that was keeping Liam and the royal family during their Swiss leg of the tour. The only thing Victoria was expected to do was switch from holding onto Liam to holding onto Drake. She hadn’t even realised that had been clinging to Liam until they gently detached her and then Drake had his arm around her to support her. She didn’t realise what the point was until they were greeted by the concierge. They bypassed the regular foyer, but even so, it wouldn’t have looked very good for the engaged King of Cordonia to be arm in arm with a woman who wasn’t his fiancée. Victoria supposed she ought to have felt embarrassed to be so reliant on them for staying upright, but she was still shaken by the whole night and frankly, they both felt warm and sturdy and that was exactly what she needed. Drakes arm was firmly around her; she thought she couldn’t have fallen over if she’d tried. This close to him she could smell his aftershave. Where Liam smelled lightly of citrus, Drake’s aroma was earthier; a campfire in a forest clearing compared to a picnic in a summer orchard.

They headed up in the elevator and after a short walk, Victoria found herself in Drakes room. Here Drake finally released her and she sank into a chair, her head in her hands. She could hear the clink of glass and something pouring. Her head was too full to raise it. Full of flashes of that night mixed in with other key moments from her time in Cordonia and even horrible memories of her time before that. Times with Jimmy, or because of Jimmy. It was all such a mess. A blanket was wrapped around her. The smell of fruit. Liam. Then he moved away and a glass was set down near her by Drake. That smoked oak scent. Then they both moved away and sat in chairs nearby. They were watching over her but giving her space. Neither of them spoke or pressed her to say anything. She heard them both drink. Still, she sat with her head bowed, hair over her hands and hiding her face. It was all too much.

The hurricane in her head passed over her and the eye of the storm was a crystal-clear memory of earlier when she had launched herself at Liam. She cringed and finally looked up, tugging the blanket over her shoulders around her and pulling her legs under her after kicking off her shoes.

“I can’t believe I tried to hurt you,” she said quietly. “Bertrand and Justin will be so pissed at me.”

“Nobody needs to know,” Liam said just as softly. “Bastien won’t say anything.”

Another gut-punch memory and Victoria squeezed her eyes shut as if the scene was playing before her. “Shit, Bastien. I didn’t realise how angry I was at him.”

“Bastien's not a bad guy,” Drake said carefully. “I know why you’re mad at him, but he’s been there for both Liam and me. Kept Liam safe for years, worked closely with my dad. I promise you he’s not a bad guy.” Victoria opened her eyes and flickered her gaze to Drake, then to Liam and then to the floor.

“I’m sorry I worried you both.” She said. “I feel really idiotic now.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Drake said. “No harm done.”

Victoria stuck her hand out of the cocoon of blanket and grabbed the drink. There was a glass of whiskey next to a glass of water and as much as she wanted to reach for the soothing alcohol she grabbed the ice-cold water instead. A few sips cleared some of the fog in her brain. “I can’t be here anymore.” She said. “I need to go back to America.”

Liam went very still as she spoke.

“ _After_ you’ve cleared your name?” Drake asked. Victoria shook her head.

“I’m nowhere near close to doing that and the wedding is only five weeks away.” As she said that Victoria realised with a start that she knew the exact date and how many days away it was, too. She hadn’t thought she’d paid attention to those details, but clearly, they’d sunk in. She knew the date of Liams wedding, but not his date of birth. At this thought, she started giggling hysterically. She set down the glass in case she dropped it and kept laughing. She couldn’t seem to stop.

“Please don’t leave,” Liam said in the quietest murmur. It cut right through her hysterics, killing the laughter.

“Liam—” Drake started.

“I know I have no right to ask you to stay,” Liam continued. Victoria looked up and met his eyes and they were the saddest, darkest blue she’d ever seen. “But please don’t go.”

Victoria sighed. “What’s keeping me here?”

“Your friends,” Drake put forth, but even as he spoke Victoria could see the self-loathing in his face. “Sorry Quinn. You should go if you can’t be here.” Then he winced again. “Don’t go. Not yet.”

Victoria looked at Liam. “I can’t watch you marry her. I’ve lived through a lot of shit in my life. You both only know the least of it. But watching you marry Madeleine will destroy me. I know that sounds pathetic, but I might as well be honest.”

Liam took a deep, shaky breath. “I know.” He looked down at his hands, at the signet ring with the crest of Cordonia glinting in the lamplight. “I don’t know how either of us will bear it. There’s nothing else to be done: I’ll abdicate.”

Victoria felt the bottom drop out of the world. Drake looked shocked and turned to her with an open mouth but no sound came out. “Liam, what…?” She managed before tailing off.

“I’ve been thinking about this a lot,” Liam said suddenly, the words tumbling out of his mouth in a hurry. “Watching you be taken away the night of the ball… I felt so powerless. There was nothing I could do, so I made a plan to keep you around, to buy you some time. You’ve been working so hard to clear your name and again I’ve been useless. I can’t help you and it kills me. All I ever seem to do is hurt you. I promised you everything and left you with nothing. That’s not the man I want to be.”

“Liam you would give up the crown? Everything?” Drake asked in a croaky voice.

Liam pulled the ring off his finger and tossed it to the floor. Victoria and Drake watched it roll away and come to a rest. “Leo abdicated for love. Why shouldn’t I?”

Victoria stared down at the ring. It was heavy and golden with the crest etched on top, a single diamond sparkling in the light. Throwing the ring away wasn’t an official abdication of course, but the symbol of the thing was still immense. It struck her in that moment that if she’d ever wanted a declaration of love from Liam, she couldn’t get much bigger than this. Her over the whole of Cordonia. It was pretty clear.

It didn’t bring her any joy though like she thought it should. Instead, she got up from the chair, dropping her blanket and stepped over to the ring. She crouched and picked it up. It was heavier than she would have guessed. Just like the crown, it represented the people he was sworn to serve. And they mattered, each one. What would happen to Cordonia without her king? Who would stand in his place? Victoria couldn’t accept this, no matter how her heart ached for it. She turned and walked barefoot over to Liam. He watched her approach, his eyes giving away the fact that he knew what she was going to do.

“No, Liam. You can’t throw away your legacy for me. Cordonia needs you more than I do.” She held out her hand and wordlessly Liam reached up and let her drop the ring into his palm. “You’re easy to love, Liam,” Victoria said quietly, each word feeling like glass in her mouth as she spoke. “That’s part of my problem, but I’m not the only one who feels that way about you. Madeleine will learn to love you, too. Give her a chance. You might still get what you want after all.” Liam slipped the signet ring back on his finger where it fit as if it had never been removed.

“Victoria…” he said, but really there was nothing to say.

“I should go,” Victoria said. Without waiting for a response, she went and gathered up her shoes. “Thanks for standing up for me. I really wish you’d done it sooner.”

With that, she made for the door.

*  


“Quinn, wait,” Victoria kept on walking and let Drake catch up with her. Now that he drew up beside her she realised she had expected him. A quick glance over her shoulder showed that Liam had not followed, and she was glad. They reached the elevator and stepped inside. Once the doors closed Drake turned to her. “Are you alright?”

Victoria gave him a weary look. “I’ve been better.” They descended slowly. “How did it come to this?” Victoria murmured softly. Drake gave her a pained look. “When I came here I figured I’d either impress Liam or I wouldn’t. I had no idea how hard it would get or how damn depressing. You knew. I should have listened to you all along.”

“I wanted to be wrong,” Drake said quietly. “I wanted to be wrong so badly.”

Victoria smiled wanly. “Me too.”

*

Victoria was accosted almost immediately when she got on the train. Hana and Maxwell had been waiting for her it seemed and they burst up when they saw her.

“Victoria, what happened?” Hana asked, her brown eyes concerned.

“Where have you been?” Maxwell added. “We’ve been so worried.”

“Sorry guys,” Victoria said heading for her room. They followed. She’d expected that, too. Once inside she dumped her purse and reached up to grab the zipper. “It’s been a long night.” She pulled it down and stepped out of the gown. Maxwell averted his eyes at once, but Victoria rolled hers. “Maxwell, you’ve seen me half naked before. So has anyone who follows the news. I really don’t care if you look at me right now.”

He maintained his polite stance, head turned away from her to peer out of the dark window. Victoria kicked away the dress and shoes and pulled on her baggiest, comfiest clothes. “Where did you go?” Hana pressed. “Madeleine said you left the club.”

“I did,” Victoria said, flopping down onto her bunk. “Needed some air.”

Hana sat down gingerly beside her. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Victoria met her friends eyes and felt a lump rise in her throat. She shook her head. She didn’t need to cry again this night. “But thanks.”

Maxwell noticed she was clothed again and turned around. “Hana has some news!”

“Oh?” Victoria asked. “Is it good? I could use some good news.”

“It’s about the credit cards,” Maxwell added and Victoria groaned.

“Maxwell, I checked the cards and none were a match,” she said grimly. Neither Hana nor Maxwell looked surprised, in fact, Maxwell glanced at Hana. “What?”

“Turns out Penelope had two cards on her this evening,” Hana said carefully. “I helped her with the taxi and saw it.”

“Wait… Penelope?” Victoria pushed herself up on her arm. “Penelope hired that photographer? _Penelope_?” She wasn’t sure what was more surprising, that Penelope had stopped thinking about poodles for more than two minutes to orchestrate a set up like this, or that it was the one person on Madeleines side who had always seemed genuinely sweet. “Man, the hits just keep coming. Penelope. Damn.”

“But there’s more,” Maxwell said eagerly. “Hana confronted her!”

“You did?”

“I did,” Hana said, her expression torn between pride and worry. “I got her alone and just came out with it. Told her about the photographer you spoke to and the receipt and that we knew it was her. And then I guilted her by telling her how much we had thought of her, and how heartbroken you would be. I laid it on quite thick. I guess I learned that from my parents.” Hana added with a shrug.

“Hana, you didn’t have to do that,” Victoria said, touched that she had stepped in where Victoria had failed.

“I did,” Hana said firmly. “You left, upset, and I couldn’t bear that. I knew I found something helpful and so I seized the opportunity.”

“What did she say?” Victoria said. “Was she working for Madeleine? Surely Penelope didn’t think getting rid of me would grant her the crown.”

At this point, both of her friends hesitated and looked at each other. Victoria felt a prickle of unease creep over her neck. “What is it?”

“Madeleine had nothing to do with it as far as we can tell,” Maxwell said. “Least she didn’t come up.”

“Penelope was working under orders,” Hana said. “She said it was Bastien who gave her the direction.”

Victoria sat bolt upright, a shock jolting through her. “Bastien?” She gaped. “I saw him tonight.”

“You did?” Maxwell asked.

Victoria didn’t hear him. She was too busy running this new information through her head. Bastien. The man who Liam had had to evade in order to carve out secret time with her during the season. The man who dragged her from the Ball, but who made sure she saw Liam select Madeline. The man who had wanted to arrest her last night for shoving the King. She supposed it stood to reason that he might not want her around, though surely he couldn’t care that much? And then there was the matter of resources, not to mention targeting Olivia as well. But the thought she kept coming back to took precedence in her mind.

“Do Drake and Liam know about this?”

“No, we haven’t told them,” Maxwell said. “We wanted to tell you first.”

Victoria sighed. “I’m going to have to let them know. Bastien is like family to Drake and Liam trusts him with his life. I can’t believe he hates me enough to do all this.”

*

The train delivered them to Paris as scheduled and Victoria prepared herself for the day. On the agenda was a charity fashion show. It sounded like the most tedious event, though she was pleased to be included in the donation from House Beaumont. At least the show was raising money for a good cause. As for the clothing items on display, they passed by in a blur of colours and shapes. Victoria was tense. She’d been tense for weeks, but now she realised how much more tense should could get. Her gaze swept the crowds at every available opportunity, scanning for Liam or Drake. She wanted to be the one to tell them about Bastien. She might have resolved to let Liam go, truly try to release him from her heart, but she knew this news would rock him. And Drake…who had all but grown up alongside Bastien especially with the connection to his beloved father. Drake who was already so mistrusting of the people he was surrounded by, and who had trusted Bastien above so many others. She couldn’t imagine how this news might crush him.

After the fashion show, there was a party. Yet more opportunities for people to give so generously and so publicly in front of the assembled press. Victoria could see Liam across the room with his father and Regina, but Drake was notably absent. The thought that Bastien was here, hidden in plain sight, potentially watching her without being spotted was unnerving. Victoria found herself jumping at the slightest noises. Mindful of her raw nerves and current tendency to cry at the drop of a hat, she eschewed the wine and stuck to water.

At some point, Victoria noticed Madeleine in her peripheral vision, though she did not turn to greet her as expected until the woman was almost upon her. “Lady Victoria? So happy to see you back again. I was quite concerned when you left my party without saying goodbye.”

Victoria now moved her head and brought her gaze down upon the blonde before her. “I didn’t mean to worry you.” She said blankly. “My apologies.”

Madeleine took in her appearance. “My dear, are you quite well? You seem paler than usual. Have you eaten today?”

“I appreciate the concern, but it’s misplaced,” Victoria said. “Honestly, I’m fine.” Then she hesitated and reached for Madeleines arm. Madeleine looked down at Victorias fingers so lightly pressed against her forearm. “Madeleine, you need to give Liam a chance. All he wants, the thing he desires above all else is a family. A loving family. I know you don’t love him now and it’s not something a person can just switch on, but you have to try. He’s a really great guy. It shouldn’t be too hard.”

Madeleine frowned. “What are you talking about?” She asked in a low voice, glancing to where the reporters were interviewing the King Father and Liam. “Keep your voice down.”

Victoria tugged her gently and to her great surprise, Madeleine let herself be lead to a quieter spot away from the crowds. “You have to find a way to love him and I’m sure he’ll love you back. He’s a romantic at heart. He wants so badly to be loved and to love.”

“I think you’re being ridiculous, Victoria,” Madeleine huffed. “Love is hardly the be-all and end-all.”

“Oh, but it matters a great deal.” Victoria breathed. “Madeleine, you’ve been engaged twice, but never with love? That shouldn’t be your life.”

“I wanted the crown so I could do good,” Madeleine hissed. “Not so I could spend my days telling a man how much I loved him.”

“I know, I know,” Victoria said hastily. “But you can do both. And Liam needs that. Being in a loveless marriage will hurt him. And I’m… I’m leaving Cordonia. So, you can’t rely on me to make him happy. I would never have been his mistress anyway. And it’s you on his arm, his wife-to-be so you should love him.”

Madeleine pulled her arm free from Victorias grip. “Look, I understand that you’re upset, and I’m not sorry to see you go as such, but I really don’t see what any of this has to do with you.”

“I will try my best to stop loving Liam,” Victoria explained. “I can’t have him so holding onto that love will just hurt me. It’s the same for him, but he can still get what he wants. A family filled with love. Maybe not with the woman he expected, but you can still be the woman he needs.”

“How?” Madeleine asked, with a roll of her eyes and an exaggerated show of being disinterested which made Victoria believe that she was going to listen quite intently. “How did you do it?”

Victoria stopped and smiled slowly. “We made time for each other. During the season we stole moments together where we could both be ourselves. He shared his hopes with me and his favourite places. Did you know I took him to see the Statue of Liberty the first night we met? The Statue is special to him so I made time to take him.”

“Is that why he always carries around that tacky keyring?” Madeleine said offhand. Victoria swallowed at the sound of her silly gift still being treated like a precious treasure.

“You should take him out on a date,” Victoria suggested. “Liam is a good king and is loyal to his people, but freedom is what he values the most. Show him you’ll always make time for that and you’re probably halfway into his heart right there.”

Madeleine glanced back at the event in the crowded room. “I don’t understand why you’re offering this advice. What’s in it for you?”

“Nothing, I guess,” Victoria said. “But isn’t that the point? You said I didn’t belong here and you were right. I’m not even a commoner amongst nobles, I’m just… trash. But Liam is golden and should be able to have what he needs.”

Madeleine turned back to Victoria and for the first time, Victoria felt she was seeing a real face behind her courtly mask. “You really do love him,” she said in wonderment.

Victoria nodded. “I do. Liam was never a prize to be won for me. Liam was home.” Victoria looked past Madeleine to where Liam was laughing at something Regina had said to the press. “Seriously, go and steal him away. Take him to see the Eiffel Tower. He loves landmarks.”

Madeleine considered Victoria for a long while, her eyes narrowed shrewdly. Then she headed for Liam and spoke softly to him as the press moved away. Liam nodded and the two of them headed out.

Victoria watched them go, then turned to find the only friendly faces in the room. Maxwell and Justin were talking in low voices, their heads bowed close together. Justin's sharp eyes caught hers and he excused himself to go over to her.

“Where’s the king off to, kid?” he asked as soon as he drew nearer. Victoria winced at the edge to his voice.

“He’s being taken out by his fiancee,” she said quietly, her heart aching to speak the words out loud. “That’s the way it should be.”

Justin adjusted his glasses, his steely eyes boring into hers. “Funny. I thought the way it was supposed to be, was you and him riding off into the sunset once we clear your name. Isn’t that what I’m here for?”

“No, you’re here to make me look good, right?” Victoria tried for a joke, uneasy with his intensity. She flashed a hollow smile. “I know, I make it easy for you, but you have to earn your paycheck some way, I guess.” Her stomach flip-flopped as she realised the casual humour she was reaching for might fall way short by talking so directly about him being paid to be there.

Justin took a moment before he replied. “I’m glad you think it’s funny.” He said tightly. “I’m not sure everyone will see it that way. My job is to make you look good and your job is to remind the king what he’s missing. Once your name is cleared everything will change and you have to be ready for it, and kid,” he sighed softly, “I just don’t know if you are. You need me more than I thought if you’re just going to roll over and let them win.”

Victoria looked down. She felt the fire of anger at his words, but it was far away, just out of reach. There was too much sadness in the way. She was tired of being angry all the time. Tired of feeling so weak. “Sorry,” she said in a murmur.

Justin reached his hand out and pressed it to her shoulder. His palm was chilled, colder than she had expected and she suppressed a shudder. “Just remember that there’s a reason you’re all placing your faith in me. I know what I’m doing.”

She didn’t watch him leave.

Victoria turned and walked back to where she’d left her glass of water, her throat dry and her eyes pricking. As she walked she felt like Jimmy and Kate were walking alongside her. Her father berating her in one ear, her mother in the other. Victoria threw back her drink in one movement and it was only after swallowing it that she tasted the bitterness. She coughed and set the glass down.

Something felt quickly felt very wrong. She turned to leave, but halfway across the room, she felt the walls buckle and the ground sway. She tipped sideways and her hand slid across a table, scattering glasses and spilling red wine. There were cries of consternation from the nobles at the table, but they sounded muffled, like she was underwater. She held up her hand and saw red wine trickling down her wrist, except that when she wiped it away it bloomed once more. A coppery smell lighted in her nose as she peered closer. She heard her name and turned, the speaker blurry like they were behind glass. She couldn’t hear and wasn’t sure if she was lying or standing. Her head spun and so too did the world. She slammed against something soft. Hands clutched at her and then she was flying through the air, the world spinning around her as she flew.

She heard more cries of her name, still from far away and then there were bright sparks of light crashing all around her. She tried to speak, but her tongue was heavy and her heart was beating so fast that her breaths were becoming too shallow for words to survive the journey from her throat to her mouth. they fizzled and flew away like tiny fireflies. A chill wafted over her and so she closed her eyes, except they were already closed. A frozen wave hit her and she went under into blackness.

The next thing she knew was voices speaking in a language she couldn’t understand, speaking fast as if they were firing questions. She opened her mouth but no words came out. Her eyes wouldn’t open. Her lids felt too heavy, like they were weighted down. She tried to keep her head above water, but another wave swallowed her and it was a mercy.

Her name. Someone was calling her name from far away. Liam? She tried desperately to open her eyes, but they weren’t obeying. “I…” was all she managed.

There was a hand on her face, fingers lightly stroking her hair off her damp forehead. She turned her head to the hand. The hand belonged to someone who was murmuring under his breath. “You’re going to be alright, you’re going to be alright.” Soft lips brushed her hair and hot, wet splashes dropped onto her face.

The flashes of wakefulness were interspersed with wild dreams. Victoria was a child again on Christmas Day when she was seven and Jimmy had crashed his bike riding drunk.

She was ten and no-one would play with her at school because she’d flown at another child in a rage after they’d called her names.

She was twelve and Kate had discovered that she’d started her period so she announced it to all the club members with a cackle; she’d been high on speed at the time.

She was sixteen and believing everything that her boyfriend was telling her about saving her from her life. Sixteen and getting the tattoo. Sixteen and walking in to find Kates bloodied body on the living room floor. Knowing she was to blame for her mothers death.

When Victoria managed to prise her eyes open there was a strange shallow light in the window. She stared out at the sky, realising it had to be sunrise creeping closer. She looked around. She was in a room with equipment and a bed with rails. She knew what it felt like to wake up in hospital no matter which county she was in.

Her head was pounding and although she was lying down the world was slowly spinning in and out of focus. Her throat felt raw, her stomach aching. Lifting her right hand to her face she saw a bandage wrapped over it and up her wrist. She remembered the blood on her arm.

Victorias gaze fell on a shape by the door. He was curled up on a chair with a coat over his chest, asleep.

“Drake?”

He woke up blearily, but focused at once when he realised, she was talking. “Victoria, thank God.” He was by her side in an instant, hands on her arm and face. “How do you feel? Should I get someone?”

“What happened?” Victoria wanted to know. “The last thing I remember was walking across the room.”

“You collapsed,” Drake said, his voice hoarse, his eyes dark with concern. “You were slurring your words, stumbling and then you passed straight out.”

“Were you there? I don’t remember seeing you.” Victoria said, concentrating on the shadowy memory.

Drake shook his head. “No, I didn’t go, but I’ve been filled in on the details. I can’t believe Maxwell left you alone. I’m going to wring his neck.”

“It’s not Maxwells fault.”

“He should have been keeping an eye on you,” Drake said fervently. “That’s his job, to keep you safe when I’m not around.”

“Wow, thanks for the confidence,” Victoria muttered. She could keep herself safe. She’d done it for years. Drake gave her a searching look.

“How much did you have to drink?”

Victoria frowned again. “Nothing. I was drinking water.” His gaze was fixed on her, not a flicker of belief in his eyes. The realisation hit her. “You think I got drunk? I didn’t.”

“Are you sure?” Drake asked. Victoria tugged her head out of his grasp and was rewarded with a shooting pain across her forehead. She raised her hand to press against the offending spot. Drake flashed her a look of guilt and busied himself pouring her a cup of water. “Here.” She took it and drank it all, her throat suddenly feeling parched at the site of water.

“Drake, I’m certain. There was something wrong with my drink.” The memory was emerging like a stone in an evaporating puddle. “I had just finished talking with Madeleine and I went back for my drink and I drank it… it tasted bitter. And then I started to feel strange and dizzy.”

“Do you think your drink was spiked?” Drake asked, his brows deeply furrowed.

“It must have been,” Victoria said insistently. “I was only drinking water. Didn’t the doctors take any blood from me to test? That’ll prove that I hadn’t been drinking.” Drake gave her a long look. “What is it?” 

“They didn’t.” He said quietly. “By the time I got here they’d pumped your stomach and started filling you with fluids.” He gestured to the IV bag connected to a line in her arm. “But, listen… the papers caught it all on camera. They’ve already run stories online about you being falling down drunk at the party. You can bet the headlines on the actual newspapers today will do the same.”

Victoria sank back against her pillows. “Are you serious? For fucks sake, I can’t catch a break, can I?”

“I’m sorry,” Drake said, running his hand over his hair. “I’m really sorry. I should have been there.”

“I guess if nothing else it means we’re getting close. Unless the blackmail from last season is unconnected to my drink being spiked. I’m not sure which is worse.” Victoria said, closing her eyes. The thought struck her that she hadn’t yet told him about Bastiens involvement. “Drake…”

“I’ll need to let Liam know.” He was saying, almost to himself. “That’ll be a fun conversation. I don’t even know if he knows you’re here. Bastien called me.”

“Wait, what?” Victoria sat up carefully so as not to jostle her tired and aching brain. “What?”

“Bastien called me,” Drake said to her. “After he brought you here.”

“Bastien brought me here?” She repeated. “Why?”

“You fell on him,” Drake explained. “He got you out of the party and brought you here and then called me. Thank goodness.”

“Drake I have to tell you something about him,” Victoria said suddenly gripping his arm. He looked down at her, eyes intent on her face. “Penelope was the one who paid the photographer at Applewood Manor.” As he reeled in confusion, she hammered the next point down hard. “She was working with Bastien.”

“What?” Drake shook his head. “No. What are you talking about?”

“Bastien organised everything.” Victoria went on. “I’m really sorry.”

Drake looked askance. “ _You’re_ sorry? You don’t have anything to be sorry for. I’m sorry that Bastien… Oh, hell, Bastien. Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Almost Lover that I used for the chapter title is by A Fine Frenzy aka Alison Sudol.
> 
> Oof, I know, another hard chapter with the angst just ticking up and up. It will get better after a while, but it mattered to me that Victoria got the chance to hear Liam defend her and get his offer of abdicating even after she didn't meet him for their blue grotto diamond scene.   
> It matters to me that Victoria makes a choice to break away from Liam for her own sanity. The game is so breezy even while our MC is dealing with press that slander her and tracking down the guy who assaulted her and Victoria already has plenty of demons to battle. She needs to feel this and make some decisions for herself. Fingers crossed you don't hate it!


	11. The Archer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reeling from the news about who set the Applewood plan in motion, Drake and Victoria distract themselves by solving a personal mystery in Paris.

_All the king’s horses, all the king’s men, couldn’t put me together again_

Drake stepped outside of the room to call Liam, but what actually happened was that he walked down the corridor, into an empty stairwell and sank back against a wall, bent double with the weight of what he had just learned. Bastien… of all the people in court… Drake was a simple guy with a shortlist of people he trusted absolutely and that list consisted of Liam at the top and just beneath him was Bastien. It was a very, very short list.

Why would Bastien care who Liam chose? Drake had always thought Bastien found Liam's evasions of him amusing, especially when compared to Leo. When Leo had flitted away from court it had been as if he were a dog straining against a leash, until he was found and returned like lost property. He had always been running before he eventually broke free of his responsibility and didn’t come back. Liam was different. His jaunts away from the palace had always been tiny holidays from his birth right. Never a serious attempt to run away, like his brother. Drake thought Bastien understood that and didn’t hold his sneaking out against him. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe Bastien was pissed about losing Liam more than even during the season. Maybe he wanted to be rid of Victoria after all?

Drake pinched his brow. This was all too much. He could have handled most anyone being the threat against Victoria, but not Bastien. He’d driven Drake, Savannah and their mother to the funeral for his dad. How could he be actively working against Liam and Victoria?

Drake pulled out his phone and slowly dialled Liam's number. Of course, it was hard to slowly dial someone on a cell phone; Liam was almost always the last person he’d rung so his number appeared high on the recent calls list and a simple button press had him listening to the ringing. Liam always answered Drakes calls, but just this once Drake half hoped this time would be different. Maybe this time he would—

“Drake?”

Maybe not.

“Hey, Liam,” Drake said running his free hand over his forehead. “Are you free to talk?”

“I just woke up,” Liam answered. “What’s up?”

Drake took in a long breath. “I’m at the hospital.”

“What? Why? Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine and just listen, OK?” Drake said hastily. “Don’t freak out until you’ve heard it all.”

“I understand.” That was Liam. Always cool in the face of dreadful news. Stoic and steady.

“Quinn… Victoria… she.” This was going about as well as expected, but he had to get it together before Liam got nervous. “Victoria is in the hospital.”

“What—?”

“Just, wait.” Drake hurried to catch the concern before it could spread. “She’s fine. She’s fine now. But, listen, you’ll see the papers soon right?”

Liam sounded like he was walking. “Yes, the morning papers are here.” A rustle of sheets.

“The press ran with a story that wasn’t… correct. You’ll probably see it, but it’s not what they thought.” Drake’s voice didn’t shake, but inside he was berating himself for skirting around the news instead of just coming out with it. He could hear the paper turn and caught Liam's intake of breath as he found the story. So, they had run it. Drake hardened his resolve. “She says she was drinking water and left her glass unattended. She thinks her drink was spiked, but the hospital didn’t take any blood so there’s no way to prove that she wasn’t drinking heavily.”

“Good God,” Liam murmured. “Were you with her?”

Drake cringed. “No.”

“Anyone else?”

He swallowed “No.”

Liam exhaled, a long breath of frustration. “I wasn’t there. We all left her alone and she was attacked. God damnit.” The sound of the papers flying and a thud as Liam hit something. Drake hung his head even though it couldn’t be seen.

“There’s more.”

“What else?” Liam asked, his voice suddenly sounding so old and tired.

“Hana and Maxwell were able to make a breakthrough in the case,” Drake said. Maxwell would have gotten a kick out of hearing him say that. “Liam, it was Bastien. He instigated the whole thing at Applewood” The silence down the phone was thick and heavy. “Liam?”

“I’m here,” Liam said in a strangled voice. “Are you sure?”

“Positive,” Drake said. “Apparently it was Penelope who delivered a letter to Tariqs room and spoke to that maid about the rooms switching, but Bastien was behind it. Liam… what the hell do we do now?”

“I don’t know,” Liam said, sounding the complete opposite as before. Now he sounded more like the ten-year-old who’d just come home from burying his mum. “Bastien… I can’t wrap my head around it.”

“Me neither,” Drake said. “I need to talk to him.”

“He’ll be scoping the location of the party tonight,” Liam said. “We could go together and confront him.”

Drake had a sudden image of the pair of them marching up to Bastien, only to dissolve with one look. How could they confront the man they’d both admired and respected for so many years?

“Maybe you shouldn’t,” Drake suggested. “Quinn could have died last night. Spiking drinks is dangerous and she says it hit her really fast so who knows how high the dose was for that to happen. It was Bastien who got her to the hospital. If he hadn’t stepped in so quickly…” The rest of that sentence hung down the line between them. Neither could bring themselves to put it into words. “Maybe you should stay back. Might be dangerous for her.”

Liam made an exasperated noise. “Maybe you’re right. You could speak to him at the party. He’ll be less busy then.”

“Ok.” Drake nodded, despite being on the phone. “Yeah, I’ll do that. Let me go tell Quinn. Do you… want me to pass on a message or anything?”

Liam sighed. “Last night I left the function early because Madeleine said she wanted to take me out to dinner. Get to know each other better away from the crowds. I can’t believe I was doing that while Victoria was…” He tailed off and drew in a shaky breath. “I don’t think there are words to cover how I feel about that right now. Tell her… tell her to get well soon.”

“OK,” Drake said quietly and they said goodbye.

*

Drake walked back into the room as Victoria was pulling out her IV. “Quinn, stop!” He cried as he took in the scene. Victoria just looked at him.

“What? It’s empty and I’m not staying here. I have to go and do something.” She left the drip lying on the bed and turned to look for her clothes from last night. “I can’t do nothing. It’ll drive me mad.”

“Wait, I have a bag for you.” Drake bent down and tossed a small fabric bag onto the bed. “Hana packed it.”

“She was here?”

“She dropped by earlier, but we decided not to draw attention to you by having too many people with you,” Drake explained flatly. He rather wished he wasn’t alone right this minute. “Once we knew you would be alright.”

“You stayed with me though?” she prompted, a memory resurfacing of a hand stroking her face, murmuring reassurances. Not Liam after all.

Drake couldn’t seem to meet her eye, hands in his pockets, shoulders raised. “I came over as soon as I heard. I wasn’t there for you when you needed someone, but I didn’t want you to be alone.”

Victoria couldn’t bear the regret in his voice, but she didn’t know how to help him. She had thought it would be Liam who would watch over her if she ever needed that, but she had pushed him away. Turning, she asked herself how this felt to have Drake as her stalwart friend and found it was oddly comforting.

Victoria reached into the bag and pulled out clothing. Hana must have packed it in a rush, but she’d covered all the bases. Drake turned around as he realised she was just going to strip off the hospital gown with no thought to his presence. Victoria pulled on underwear and a pair of jeans, then a bra, tank top and a loose sweater. Hana must have found them in her room because they were all her own things. It felt good to have something familiar on her. “Is my purse anywhere?”

Drake handed it over. Victoria checked inside and saw her phone had gone dead. Ah well, she didn’t need it if she had Drake with her.

“Did you call Liam?” She asked lightly. As if the question was no big deal. Drake turned back around.

“Yeah.” He said. Victoria waited to see if there would be any more information, but apparently, Drake had nothing else to say on the matter. That was probably best, she decided. She’d officially given up Liam last night when she’d pushed Madeleine towards him. There was no going back now as far as she was concerned. “I told him what you said about your drink. He said… he said he hopes you feel better soon.” His words floated out into a heavy silence for a few long moments.

“Ok, good.” She said finally. “I wouldn’t want him to think the stories were true.”

“Anyone who matters would know they aren’t true,” Drake said softly. Victoria gave him a stern look.

“ _You_ asked me if I’d be drinking.” She retorted. “You didn’t exactly give me the benefit of the doubt. ”

She saw Drake flinch. “Maybe, but I believed you right away when you told me the truth.”

Victoria sat on the edge of the bed and pulled on the Vans that had been in the bag with her clothes. She had a feeling the fancy stuff she’d been wearing the night before was gone for good, but she was happy to be reunited with this trusty footwear.

“So, you’re just going to leave the hospital right now?” Drake asked. “You don’t think you could use the rest and fluids? That the doctors prescribed? Doctors with many, many, _many_ years of experience under their belts?”

“No,” Victoria said. “I feel fine. I mean, I could use something to eat after having my stomach pumped, but I’m not sure I could face it right now.” She rubbed a hand over her belly. It felt tender and her throat was scratchy. That she attributed to having a tube down her throat the night before, but the overwhelming exhaustion she was trying to power through she felt had to do with whatever had been slipped in her drink. She definitely felt nauseous, but like she’d said to Drake if she stayed still she’d go mad. She had to do something. “I swore no-one would ever put me in hospital again,” Victoria said very quietly. “After that night I swore to myself that this would never happen again. No-one would put me in a position like this again.” Raising her head to meet Drakes gaze she snarled: “Whoever did this to me is going to pay. So no, I’m not staying here. I’m getting shit done.”

Drake nodded. “Fine. Check your bag. I’m sure Hana put in a baseball cap.”

Victoria frowned. “She did?” She stuck her hand back inside and pulled out a black cap.

“Give you some privacy when you leave.”

Victoria nodded and slid the cap over her head. Some privacy wouldn’t hurt at all.

*

They managed to evade the press with relative ease. Drake exited the hospital out of the front entrance and let himself be pictured alone, throwing some snide comments at the press as they as Victoria slipped out of a side entrance in her casual clothes and pulled down hat. They joined up again down the street and Drake waved down a taxi as he refused to let Victoria walk too far and she was reluctant to admit that it was needed. She felt weak and sore and hated every second of it. Drake had the cab take them to a cafe and insisted on buying her some breakfast. Victoria was torn as to whether she felt more hungry or more sick, but even so, she managed some toast and juice.

“So where next? Back to the train?” Drake asked. He’d filled her in on the plan to confront Bastien at the bachelor party later, so she knew there was nothing scheduled for her that day or evening.

“Just killing time until the party I guess,” Victoria said over her OJ. Drake narrowed his eyes.

“You know you aren’t coming to the party, right?” he said firmly. “You’re not invited and it could be dangerous for you.”

Victoria set her glass down and glared. “Drake Walker, if you think I’m sitting around and waiting for you to do my dirty work, you’ve got another thing coming. Now either you can take me to the party or I’ll get Maxwell to take me. Who would you feel better about accompanying me?”

Drake sighed, but he had to chuckle darkly. “I guess I’d rather know I had my eye on you. Damnit, Quinn, you know me too well.”

Victoria nodded. She did know him well; she knew he cared for her as more than a friend. She knew she had feelings for him as well. For once the thought of their connection didn’t hurt as much as usual, there was no guilt-ridden heaviness at the thought of feeling something for someone besides Liam. Liam had Madeleine and she had no-one, except maybe that wasn’t totally true. “And I want you to know,” she said softly, reaching across the table to gently stroke his hand as it rested by his coffee cup. “how much I appreciate that you have my back.”

Drake stared down at her fingers on his skin for a long moment before his hand twitched. For a second Victoria felt sure that he was moving to hold her hand, but then he seemed to think better of it and pulled it away. She was surprised at how sharp the pang of regret felt as she watched him draw his hands to himself.

“What are you up to today?” She asked after a moment.

Drake shrugged. “It’s probably nothing, but do you remember that envelope of cash we found in the Beaumonts study?”

Victoria nodded, remembering. “I do. It had a Paris address, right? You’re planning on checking it out?”

“I am. I’m sure it’s a waste of time and not connected to the blackmail conspiracy or anything, but I can’t get it out of my head.” Drake said. “You could come along, I guess?”

“I’m there.”

*

Getting a taxi to head across Paris to the nondescript apartment was easy enough. It was only a small building, clearly, once a fancy estate that had been converted into separate living spaces, but they were able to enter the building and head upstairs to the right number. Drake didn’t say a word about Victoria, but she noted he silently waited for her to catch her breath after the steep staircase and placed a steadying hand on her arm when she had a moment's dizziness. Far from irritating her with his minding of her, she felt a great sense of loss when he took his hand back.

“This is it,” Drake said as they reached the door. “Ready?”

“Ready, partner.” Victoria quipped, attempting an accent straight out of a Film Noir. Drake chuckled and knocked.

Victoria could hear someone moving about inside. “Someone’s home.”

The door opened and Victoria watched Drake turn from her to the figure on the threshold and his entire face changed in an instant. Victoria craned her head around to take in the woman before them. She was the same height as Drake, with light brown hair that hung down past her shoulders, but her eyes were eyes Victoria knew so well.

“Drake?” the woman said.

“Savannah?” Drake's voice was strangled.

“ _Savannah_?” Victoria echoed. It seemed such a surreal moment to be standing here with Drake, still a little woozy from her hospitalisation and suddenly his sister was there. His missing sister, who he was desperate to find.

“Hey, who’s at the door?” A familiar voice preceded a familiar face and Maxwell appeared behind Savannah. He took in the faces before them and paled. “Oh, hi Drake. Victoria? Should you even be out of the hospital?”

“Maxwell?” Drake gaped. His face changed again and hardened into a mask of fury. Victoria could almost feel it curling off his body.

“Drake,” Savannah said, stepping out slightly and reaching for him. “Now don’t—”

At that moment a cry floated out of the apartment. Victoria frowned. Surely she was dreaming? It sounded like the keening cry of an infant calling for its mother.

“Mama’s coming,” Savannah called back, turning in an instant from her unexpected guests and disappearing into the back rooms.

“Drake?” Victoria asked, touching his arm. It was tense. “Are you ok?”

“I… Savannah’s a _mom_?” Drake asked though he didn’t seem to be addressing anyone in particular. He looked like he’d just gone eight rounds in a boxing ring. He seemed dazed. Victoria hung onto his arm, trying to ground him and also give her something to brace herself. She was much more tired than she’d appreciated.

“You need to stay calm.” She said, feeling like she was stating the obvious. Drake turned to her, aghast.

“ _Calm_?” He cried. “How the hell am I supposed to stay calm right now?”

“I don’t know,” Victoria replied. He’d dislodged her hold on him and she blinked, trying to get him back into focus.

“Victoria, are you alright?” Maxwell asked, stepping forward. Victoria turned to say she was fine, but suddenly the wall was pressed against her arm. It wasn’t the wall that had moved, she realised, it was her. Drake seemed to snap out of his panic and grabbed her and between them, Maxwell and Drake walked Victoria into the apartment and sat her at the kitchen table.

“Is she alright?” Maxwell asked over the top of her head. She would have been offended but she was trying to stop her vision from juddering around.

“She’s probably got low blood sugar or something,” Drake replied. “She had her stomach pumped, though I got her some breakfast.”

“Sweet tea then,” Maxwell said officiously and busied himself with the kettle and a teabag. After a few moments, a steaming cup of tea was placed before Victoria. “I put a lot of sugar in. It’s how the British cope with stress, don’t you know?” Victoria managed a weak smile.

“Don’t think you’re off the hook just because you’re concerned about Quinn,” Drake growled at Maxwell.

“Drake, now Drake, listen,” Maxwell said, slowly moving around so the table was between him and his angry friend. “I can explain…”

But before he could Savannah came back out of the bedroom holding a baby in her arms. “Wait, Drake, let _me_ explain. Don’t be mad at Maxwell”

“Hang on, before you say anything,” Drake said, his words much softer for his sister. “You don’t have to explain to me. Anything, not if you don’t want. And if you want me to leave I’ll go. I didn’t know you lived here, so I wasn’t trying to corner you or anything like that.”

Savannah’s eyes creased and tears welled. “No, I… oh, Drake.” She thrust the baby at Maxwell who had come around to her at the sight of her being upset, or perhaps to use her as a human shield, Victoria was unclear on that part. Maxwell sat down next to Victoria with the bundle as Savannah flew into Drake's arms and sobbed. Victoria looked at Maxwell and the baby. She would never have assumed Maxwell would be anything but hopeless with children, but he adjusted his hold so the baby was comfortable and spoke to it in a tender voice she had never heard him use. Victoria observed this and a thought came into view.

“Maxwell?” She asked softly. “Is it yours?”

Maxwell opened his mouth to reply, but Savannah pulled away from Drake at that moment. “No.” She said, wiping her eyes. “Maxwell isn’t the father. But you do have something in common with him, Uncle Drake.”

Drake was too busy reeling from his new title, so Victoria pieced it together. “Bertrand?”

Savannah nodded and went to collect her child from Maxwell. “Drake? Do you want to meet my son?”

“I, er, yes?” Drake said, looking so terrified that Victoria almost laughed. She hid her smile behind her teacup. Savannah carefully placed the baby in Drakes arms where he swallowed and peered down at the tiny human in his hold. “Is this right?”

“Here,” Savannah leaned over and helped him hold the baby more comfortably. “His name is Bartie.”

“Wow.” Drake breathed looking down in the big eyes of Bartie who was staring back at him. “Hi, there little guy.”

Victoria felt something warm blossom in her chest watching Drake hold his nephew so sweetly. He held the baby away from his chest, supported along the length of his arm. The big muscles rigid cradling the soft blanket that swaddled the small baby. His eyes were bright with wonder as Drake looked down at his sisters' child.

“How does it feel to find your sister and a new nephew in one fell swoop?” Victoria asked. The tea was doing a good trick of blowing away the fuzziness around her brain.

Drake chuckled softly. “Odd. But OK.” Then he looked up at Savannah. “Do you want to talk?”

Savannah hesitated then nodded. “I’m so sorry I shut you out Drake. I didn’t mean to, but as the time went on I didn’t know how to call you and explain over the phone. But it was stupid of me, I’m sorry.”

“Forget about it,” Drake said. Victoria remembered watching him call out for her at the Nevrakis estate in the snow, hearing him make all the dire warnings regarding trusting the nobility. She recalled the moment in the Beaumonts study when Drake said that that was the last time he saw Savannah. That he would wave away all that pain, that worry and frustration to save his sisters feelings seemed like a terribly generous thing to do. As an only child, Victoria couldn’t help but wonder if this was normal between siblings or just something special for the Walkers. Then she remembered how Liam didn’t hold anything against Leo for choosing his life over the crown, for putting Liam in the position he had fled from and for the first time she wondered what she had missed never having had a brother or sister.

“First things first, as you’ve gathered by now his father is Bertrand,” Savannah says. “But Bertrand doesn’t have a clue, right Maxwell?”

“Right.” Victoria peered at Maxwell's pained face and saw the weight of his secret. Maxwell adored Bertrand, what must it have cost him to keep this from him she wondered.

“I’d always thought the world of Bertrand, but I didn’t think I was even on his radar.” Savannah was saying with a taciturn smile and a delicate blush. “But we got to talking at the last Beaumont Bash, I mean for hours and hours. It was really special and then…”

Victoria watched as Savannah tailed off, sparing her brother the details.

“But anyway, Bartie was the result,” Savannah said briskly. “I did try to tell Bertrand once I found out when I took a test. I guess he had regrets about that night though because before I could even begin, I got a speech about how we couldn’t be together or anything.”

“When she left the estate, I saw her crying,” Maxwell took up the tale slowly. “And I went after her and the whole story poured out. I guess I was just in the right place at the right time.”

“Or else you would have done this literally all by yourself?” Victoria suggested. Savannah shrugged and nodded slowly.

“What about mom?” Drake asked suddenly. “Does she know? Why did you come to Paris of all places instead of going to her?”

Savannah flushed. “For the same reason, I didn’t go to you. I was ashamed.”

A silence lapsed over them all apart from Bartie who was making noises at Drake.

“I think you’re remarkable,” Victoria said suddenly into the quiet. Her voice sounded very loud in the small, crowded kitchen. “I can’t imagine anything harder than setting out as a solo parent.”

“Oh!” Savannah said, surprised by this praise. “Thank you. But Maxwell has helped from afar.”

“That’s where the money kept going?” Victoria asked looking to the younger Beaumont again. “And you just let Bertrand think you were shi— oh sorry.” She cut off her curse word suddenly remembering normal parents probably didn’t like it when adults threw around bad language as hers had. “Um, bad with money and irresponsible? And the whole time you’ve been helping Savannah and Bartie?”

Maxwell shrugged. “Gotta look after all the Beaumonts.” He mumbled. “Especially the teeny tiny ones.”

Victoria turned back to Savannah. “You know, I’m certain Bertrand would want to help you out, too.” She said cautiously, aware of how many feet she could be stepping on with this line of thought. “He’d want to know about his son.”

Savannah nodded. “I know. But can you imagine anything more pathetic than crawling to him and making him feel obligated? I don’t want him to feel like I’m trapping him.”

“It takes two to make a baby,” Victoria put forth mildly. “I don’t see why it should all fall to you.”

“It doesn’t though,” Savannah said. “Not really. I’m luckier than most; I don’t have to worry about finding a job and finding someone to look after Bartie. We can always afford groceries and clothes. I didn’t want to take Maxwell's money at first, but he started sending gifts instead so I thought it would be best to just accept the cash.”

Victoria chuckled. Savannah went over to Drake to find that Bartie had dropped back off to sleep in his arms. “You seem to be taking this quite well, Drake.” She said hesitantly.

“Honestly?” Drake said softly so as not to disturb the baby. “I missed you so much and I just wanted to know you were safe. Now I know the situation I just want to be here for you anyway I can be. And for Bartie, too, of course.” He adjusted his arms carefully so that the baby was supported against his chest and held with his strong hand and used his now free arm to pull Savannah closer. “I love you, sis.”

The morning moved into the afternoon and Savannah made them all lunch, which was well received as Victoria felt her appetite return and with it her strength. Drake got to spend time with his sister and with his nephew and it was like Victoria could literally see his soul lighten. He laughed more, smiled more in this slice of time in this Parisian apartment. Victoria was the only one who didn’t get a turn holding the baby, which was exactly as she wanted it.

She didn’t need to snuggle that warm body or smell that gorgeous smell to remember that once they were married Liam and Madeleine would be starting their own family. Victoria had never expected to have children herself, would never have chosen them for herself, but like with so many other things, meeting Liam had given her pause for thought. She still didn’t want children, but she would have been willing to have talked to Liam about it and maybe bend a little. It wasn’t her dream, but it was his and she loved him. She may have decided to let Liam go, but all of the plans she’d begun to make after falling in love with him were like balloons whose strings were knotted around her heart. To let them go she needed to untangle the strings one by one lest she damage her heart further. No, she didn’t need to hold Bartie. Not that day.

She was warmed just watching Drake. He had seemed awkward at first but soon settled in with his nephew. The love seemed to have hit him fairly quickly and he made up for lost time with plenty of silly faces and cuddles for Bartie. She never dreamt that the surly loner she had met all those months ago could be reduced to a gooey marshmallow by a tiny baby, but there it was.

Victoria borrowed Drakes phone to check the time and then as she looked back at the sofa where the reunited brother and sister were laughing together and peering down at the baby she flipped to the camera and snapped a picture. They didn’t notice, but she hoped Drake would see it later and feel glad to have it.

As the afternoon began to creep in the men and Victoria had to make their way back to the train to prepare for Liam's official Stag Do, the one in New York having been more of a last-minute trip before the social season kicked off. They all said their goodbyes and the siblings exchanged numbers and email and every other form of communication so they could keep hold of each other better now. Savannah hugged Victoria as they left. Victoria just smiled awkwardly.

Maxwell caught the taxi back to the train with them and seemed to be practically bouncing as he got in the car. Drake shut the door and then immediately rounded on him. “Don’t think you’re off the hook.” He growled.

“Me?” Maxwell replied stupidly, his laughter dying at the thunderous expression on Drake's face.

“You knew where Savannah was this whole time and you never thought to mention it to me?” Drake’s eyes were hard.

Victoria slipped her hand into his and made him jump. “Drake.” She tried to placate him. “It wasn’t Maxwell's fault.”

“Don’t take his side,” Drake bit back harshly, pulling his hand free. Victoria reeled back as if he’d slapped her. Clearly, she’d imagined the closeness between them she thought she’d felt. She folded her hands in her lap and didn’t speak again. It wasn’t her place.

“I didn’t know what to say, but I’m so, so sorry,” Maxwell said hurriedly. “We’re still friends, right?”

“Don’t count on it.” Drake retorted.

The rest of the drive was silent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Taylor Swift, The Archer. 
> 
> Victoria's emotional rollercoaster is a taking her for a spin this chapter. She's trying to use logic to fight the love she feels for Liam and she thinks she's doing so well. Oh, my sweet summer child...


	12. A Sadness Runs Through Him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party kicks off in more ways than one.

_Don’t look at me with those eyes_

As Victoria was getting ready there was a knock at the door. “It’s open,” she said, concentrating on her mascara. In the small mirror she caught a glimpse of Drake in a suit and she turned around. “Wow, you look good, Drake.” She said approvingly.

“Yeah, thanks,” Drake replied, shifting where he stood with discomfort. “Look, Quinn, I’m sorry I snapped at you back in the car. I guess I was just raging at anyone, but I didn’t mean to be so hard on you.”

Victoria replaced the wand in the tube and screwed the cap back on. Then she turned back to him. “It’s fine. Already forgotten.”

Drake looked unsure. “I’m really sorry.”

“Yeah, you said,” Victoria replied curtly. “Honestly don’t worry about it. I shouldn’t have said anything, it wasn’t my business after all.”

Drake looked pained.

“I wanted to thank you as well,” he said. He seemed to steel himself as he walked forward to her. “I’m really grateful you were there today. It…helped.”

Victoria looked up at him. His brown eyes were open and she could see regret in them after all, when she hadn’t expected any. His snap had wounded her, as pathetic as that made her feel, but his apology was sincere and she was eager to forgive him.

She smiled warmly and reached up to cup his cheek. “I was happy to help.” His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, his clean shaved skin warm against her palm. Then he stepped out of her reach and stuffed his hands into his pockets. Victoria could see them tremble as he did so. She lowered her hand from the now empty air and reached for her phone.

“Would you take this with you tonight?” She asked. “I don’t really want to take a bag.”

Drake frowned. “I’m not your boyfriend, Quinn.” He said with a sneer.

Victoria felt something snap in her and she set her phone back down hard. “Real mature, Walker.” She replied. “I’ve got to say I’m loving the return of snarky, capricious asshole Drake. I was beginning to miss him.” Drake looked away, with a slight curl to his lip and a tightness around his eyes.

“Just leave it, Quinn.” He said.

“No, I won’t leave it.” She burst forth with, the stress of the past few weeks erupting out of her mouth. “You said you were my friend and you’ve been here for me more than anyone and I am grateful, but I’m not ready to deal with you if you’re going to switch back to how you were with me before. Stop biting my head off.”

“I’m not,” Drake mumbled. “I _am_ your friend, I just don’t want to…confuse things.”

Victoria's feet made a decision before her brain did as she marched across the small space and shoved Drake against the door. He as just enough time to react with a surprised face and a “What the hell—?” before she reached for his collar and tugged him down to her face. She captured his mouth in an angry kiss.

Drakes hands grasped her bare upper arms and gripped her, returning the kiss hungrily. Victoria leaned into him, but then he pushed her back away from him. “What the fuck did you do that for?”

Victoria stumbled against the small table. “Well, I had to do something to prove there was a least a small part of you that actually likes me.” She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, breathing hard. “Can you please decide which Drake you’re going to be now and stick to it? I can’t deal with not knowing whether you want to be around me or not.”

“Of course, I like you,” Drakes voice was dripping with disdain, but she believed him even so. He huffed as he lowered his voice. “You know how much I like you.”

Victoria pushed off from the table. “Then give me a grown-up answer about my damn phone. Either carry it for me or I’ll leave it here.”

Drake sighed and stuck out his hand. “Fine. Give me your stupid phone.”

Victoria handed it over and smoothed down her dress. “Thank you.” As she reached past him to open the door she looked up at him from behind her tumbling black curls and said: “And if you wanted to be my boyfriend all you had to do was ask.”

*

_Damn her._

Drake was mad again, though he was trying to keep it in check. Everything was a mess when it should have been sweet. He now knew where Savannah had been this whole time and that she was alright. He knew that Maxwell had been keeping an eye on her, although knowing that Maxwell had also been the gatekeeper to finding her and had never said anything made him want to beat him to a bloody pulp. And then there was Quinn. Damn her.

Drake was sat in a car with Maxwell and Victoria and hating every moment. He wanted to grab Maxwell by the neck and he wanted to grab Victoria in a very different way. She looked like a million dollars in a black sparkly dress that skimmed tightly over her body and exposed so much of her long, pale legs that brought to mind the night at Applewood Manor when he’d found Tariq on her. The dress was her typical fashion, high in the front and back to keep those notorious scars from sight, but the front was cut into two panels that met just under her neck. The panels created a slit that was only visible with certain movements and that slit was cut down low. When Victoria had handed him her phone he had caught a glimpse— just the merest moment really— of the crest of her cleavage. He’d almost dropped the phone right then.

And damn her for kissing him. He was trying to be decent, didn’t she realise that? Trying to keep his distance from her in this difficult time. No matter how badly he wanted to kiss her in whatever she was wearing.

He swallowed. It was one thing to think about Victoria when he was alone at night, but now with her thigh pressed against his leg, he had to keep it together.

Neither he nor Maxwell were happy about her coming along. Irritating though it was the two men agreed in that it was potentially too dangerous for Victoria to come along to the Stag Do. Yet here she was. Figured she would get her own way as usual.

“So the plan for tonight,” Maxwell said, going over their hastily constructed scheme for that evening again. “Is that I create a distraction and you guys go get Bastien, right?”

“Either that or I go after him by myself,” Victoria said with a look to Drake. “I don’t want to keep you from your best friends special night. Nor put you in a position you’d feel uncomfortable with.”

Drake scoffed, thinking of the kiss from earlier. “Yeah right,” He said, but then pulled himself back to the present. “I mean, I’m not letting you confront him alone. And I’d like to hear it for myself, too.” Drake said, that now familiar stab of betrayal in his chest when he thought of Bastien hurting them. “I have to.”

“OK, so it’s a date,” Victoria said with the smallest smirk and then turned away.

Damn. Her.

They pulled up to the entrance of the venue and Drake rolled down the window to allow the guard to inspect them. He handed over the invitations for Maxwell and Drake and saw the guard lean down and raise an eyebrow without speaking at Victoria. “Er…” Drake started.

“I’m with Drake,” she said, and Drake suddenly felt her hands sliding through his arm and around his neck. He shivered. “We’re inseparable.” And she pressed a warm pair of lips to his earlobe. “Isn’t that right, darling?”

“I… that’s right,” Drake managed. The guard winked and nodded, turning to speak to the driver to give him directions. Drake turned to Victoria and whispered to her as if they were continuing the charade. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Don’t be so temperamental, it worked didn’t it?” She whispered back with a smile for the guard who was glancing back at them.

“Warn me next time.”

“But you’re so cute when you’re flustered.”

“Damn it, Quinn,” Drake said in a tight voice as the car begin to move on.

Maxwell, thankfully as far as Drake was concerned, was oblivious to the whispered argument and just gave them a thumbs up. “Great work, team.”

“I’m glad that worked,” Victoria said taking her hands back. “Wasn’t sure the guard would buy us as a couple if I didn’t labour the point.” Drake shot her a withering look.

“Nah, you guys look great together,” Maxwell said breezily as the car finally drew to a stop. “Alright, I’ll go in first and make a big show of being fashionably on time. Nobody will suspect Drake if he’s late.” He hesitated as he made to leave. “Be careful Victoria.”

She nodded and he disappeared inside.

Drake sighed. “He’ll be lost at the snack table in no time.”

“Have some faith in Maxwell,” Victoria chided him. “He’s a good guy and he means well. Like… with… Savannah…”

Drake noted how carefully she was speaking and although his fists clenched he had to admit she was right. “I know. It’s just hard to think that he had the answers I needed all along and never even though to let me know she was OK.”

“Keeping secrets is really hard,” Victoria said. “As soon as you tell someone it massively increases the chance of someone slipping up and Savannah entrusted him with a huge secret. I’m kind of amazed he never cracked once and what’s more he let Bertrand think the worst of him in order to protect your sister. That’s kind of heroic.”

Drake took a long time before formulating his reply. “That may be true, but I’m not ready to hear it. Can you drop it please?”

And mercifully she did.

*

Inside the room was lit with dim lamplight. It was effortlessly refined and there were finely dressed nobles standing around and talking in low voices while they drank dark liquors and ate steak. The smell of cigar smoke came from a smoking area. Victoria wanted to gag at the sight of it all. “Christ, this like a parody of masculinity.” She remarked quietly. “Is this what Liam wanted?”

“No, New York was what Liam wanted,” Drake replied. “You know that.”

“How about you?” She asked, nudging him with her elbow. “This must be what heaven looks like to you.”

Drake still hadn’t looked at her since they’d come in and his eyes were practically shining. “It’s pretty amazing.”

Victoria laughed. “Go on and enjoy yourself. It might relax you.” She smiled and looked around at the men. “Bastien can’t be that hard to find. Plus he’s kind of a Victoria-seeking-missile. I bet he’ll find me soon enough.”

Drake turned to her and shook his head. “No, I want to help you. Besides I need to speak to him, too.” As Victoria started to walk around the room still sticking to the walls, he reached for her arm. “But, it would probably help us fit in if we had some whiskey don’t you think?”

Victoria turned back to him with a smile. “Go on then.”

Drake grinned, finally seeming more like the man who was her friend and busied himself with two glasses. Victoria took hers and watched him take a deep sip and savour the flavours on his tongue before swallowing. “Ahh,” he said reverently. “I think this whiskey is older than I am. Definitely costs more than everything I own!”

Victoria mirrored him by taking a deep swallow. It was smokey and hot, like drinking a forest fire. Drake watched her, eager to hear her thoughts. “This whiskey is like your soulmate.” She said looking up at him with a teasing smile. “I bet this is what you’d bleed if I cut you instead of actual blood.”

Drake raised his glass to his lips and smiled down at her. “Please don’t try to find out.” He said taking another deep drink. “But I can accept that.”

Victoria watched him drink. If she kissed him right now he would taste of aged, fiery whiskey. She paused to consider her thoughts for the moment. She was OK with lusting after Drake. She couldn’t have Liam, so she was letting him go, but that didn’t mean she had to be alone right now. She’d be alone soon enough after she returned to New York. For now, why not give in to the temptation of a man who was unattached and available and who had been quite open about the fact that he wanted her.

Drake glanced at her, then looked over her shoulder. “Maxwell is busy,” he said crossly. “I better go remind him he’s supposed to be working instead of eating his body-weight in steak. Stay here.”

Victoria found an alcove to duck into as Drake headed away and backed up with her glass. She took another sip of the liquid as someone spoke.

“Victoria?” She whirled around. Apparently this was a popular alcove.

Liam stepped closer, his gaze sweeping over her searching before landing on her right hand which was still bandaged. “Oh, you’re hurt.” He said reaching for her arm. Victoria tugged her arms to herself, avoiding his touch. His eyes flashed with sorrow, but he moved back without complaint.

“It’s nothing really.” She said. “Some glass and I had a disagreement. Apparently. I don’t really remember.”

Liam looked wretched. “I can’t believe I let you get hurt.”

“You didn’t,” Victoria said matter of factly. If she didn’t look him in the eye she could pretend he wasn’t hurting as much as he was. “Everyone’s blaming themselves, but nobody’s to blame except whoever spiked my drink. I was the stupid one. I’ve worked in bars long enough to know never to return to an unattended drink. I was careless, but I’m not to blame either. But we’ll find whoever did it.”

“You look amazing,” Liam mumbled the words, almost as if he was trying to hold them back and couldn’t quite manage it.

Victoria blushed, the heat spreading over her face before she knew what was happening. No. This was no good. She had let him go. “Thanks. This is pretty amazing. Drake’s in heaven.”

Liam managed a small smile. “I thought he’d like it.”

Victoria cocked her head to one side. “This does seem more him than you. Apart from the nobles of course. Did you have him in mind when you planned this?”

Liam shrugged. “Maybe. I had my trip to New York so I didn’t really need this.” He met her gaze and Victoria could practically see through his eyes. The Statue of Liberty. The New York skyline. Her. Oh, that night. She needed to disperse the memory.

“How was your date with Madeleine?” She asked, summoning the name of what could best ground them both before they floated away. Liam's gaze clouded at once.

“It was perfectly pleasant.” He said. “How did you know about that?”

“I suggested it to her,” Victoria said, suddenly unable to look at him. “I’m glad she took my advice.”

Liam looked pained and for a moment his mouth moved with no sound. Finally, he managed: “You did?”

She shrugged, feeling oddly guilty. “Yeah, I told her that the pair of you ought to make space for love to grow.”

Liam bent his head, gaze now angled to the floor. “I see.”

“I don’t want you to be miserable in your marriage,” Victoria said, suddenly feeling the urge to explain it all over again. She got the strange sense that of all the things keeping them apart, it was this moment that felt like a break-up. “I’m leaving when this is done, you know that. I want to know you’ll be alright when I’m gone.”

Liam met her look and offered a pale imitation of a smile. “You’re always thinking of me. Oh, Victoria.” He looked past her and then snapped back to her with an intense look. “I might have some news. Will you find me when you’re done here? I really need to talk to you.”

Victoria pulled back, overwhelmed by the forcefulness. “Sure, OK.”

Liam seemed about to say something else, but instead he just nodded. “Good luck. Let me know if I can help.” And with a last rueful glance at her, he exited the alcove.

*

Liam spied Drake at once and felt the burst of speed that drove him across the room so that he was standing before him within moments. Was it desperation that fuelled his steps or anger?

“What happened to it being too dangerous for Victoria to come here?”

Drake couldn’t meet his eye, his mouth pinched as Liam spoke. “I know,” he said quietly. “I told her that, too, but you know Quinn.”

Liam felt a sudden spark of jealousy inside him, a sick strange sensation. He’d felt it once before, back when Drake had moved away to go to college. Now it was lit by the thought of Victoria. “I do know her,” he said, his voice twisted and low. He had never heard this sound come out of his mouth, let alone directed at his best friend. “I know Victoria.”

All at once Drake was able to face him and the two men stood eye to eye. Drakes tone was just as hard as his. “Don’t worry, I’m looking after her. She won’t get hurt on my watch.”

It took all he had not to reel backwards at Drakes words. “That was a low blow,” Liam said. A dangerous edge sliced through his words. “You know how hard I’m working to protect her.”

Drake looked away, his jaw tight. With his eyes trained over Liam's shoulder, he sucked in a deep a breath as he could manage. “Yeah, I know. But you might have to let her leave anyway. Right now that’s all she wants to do and if she wants to go, I will help her.”

Liam watched Drake push away and go without a word of rebuttal. His chest felt hollow and there was something inside trying to get out, something that felt horribly like his heart. Infused with panic it would not settle. He’d been out on hunts with his father before, but not many as he’d taken one look at the pheasant spooked by the dogs into a desperate flight above the tall grass and he’d burst into tears at the sight of the creature struggling to survive. He’d been fourteen.

He stumbled away from the room through a doorway that took him down a short corridor towards the kitchen and sank against the wall, pressing his forehead to the cool bricks. He told himself every day that he might lose Victoria despite everything he was trying to do to make her safe, but he never quite believed it. Now it felt very real indeed and what was worse was the sudden dragging sensation that he might very well lose Drake at the same time.

*

Victoria took another drink before attempting to leave her hidden place of safety. She breathed in the heat of the alcohol to ground her and to chase away the lingering scent of Liam. She needed to keep a clear head and the thought of whiskey being better for that than Liam made her feel sick.

She stepped out of the alcove to look around for Drake and Maxwell.

“Lady Victoria! What an unexpected surprise!” With a sinking feeling, she turned to see Lord Neville making his way over to her with an unlit cigar between his teeth. He took it out and smiled at her, his gaze travelling slowly from her feet to her face, pausing once or twice as it journeyed up her body. Victoria gritted her teeth. “You look absolutely _ravishing_ tonight.”

“Thank you, Lord Neville,” she replied curtly. “You have such a way with words, but I’m afraid I can’t stop to socialise.”

“I’m sure you can spare me a moment of your time.” He said coming closer. She stepped back, and with a few steps, she realised she’d been manoeuvred back into the alcove.

“Lord Neville, really,” Victoria said looking past him in the hopes that either Drake or Liam were coming back. “This is hardly appropriate.”

“Neither is having a woman at a Stag Party,” Neville countered. “Unless of course she is the entertainment.”

Victoria saw red and flung the rest of the contents of her glass into his face. As he reeled from the sudden burning sensation in his eyes, she shoved him aside and stormed from the alcove.

“Quinn?” She heard Drake and made her way over to him. “You OK?”

“Yep.” She said shortly. “Fine.”

She saw Drake look over her shoulder at the emerging figure of Lord Neville and his face changed as he clearly put two and two together. “What did he—” he began moving around Victoria, but she grabbed him.

“Don’t.” She said. “Is Maxwell ready? I want to just get this over with.”

Drake glanced back at her, his eyes fuelled with righteous anger, but he nodded. “If you’re sure?”

“I’m sure.” She said. “But… thanks.”

Maxwell bounded over to them. “Right, I’ll head to the centre and get started.”

Victoria pulled back to the wall with Drake as Maxwell did as he said and began to speak loudly. “Ladies and gentlemen! I mean just gentlemen. No ladies here, not a one. Anyway, my dear gentlemen, I’d like to propose a toast to our esteemed King Liam!”

The eyes of the men in the room all turned towards Maxwell enabling Drake and Victoria to skirt around the back wall. Maxwell brought his rousing speech to a close with a toast and as everyone raised their glasses, Victoria felt a hand take her arm and pull her aside into a small room off the main one. She turned to see the face of Bastien and hardened her eyes.

“Hello Drake,” Bastien said, not looking away from Victoria. “I see you’ve brought a security breach with you.”

“Security breach?” Victoria replied tartly. “It’s a little long as a nickname, but I’ll take it.”

Drake stepped up alongside her. “Bastien, we need to talk to you.”

“I’m afraid you need to leave,” Bastien said. “There’s no option for talking.”

“We mean _talk,_ ” Drake said, his voice sharper. Bastien turned to Drake for the first time, never easing his grip on Victoria's arm. The memory of the Coronation Ball swelled with every tightening of his hand on her.

“Drake I know you and her are close,” Bastien said in a low voice as if Victoria couldn’t hear him despite her proximity to them. “I can escort you our as well if you can’t bear for her to go alone.”

Drake edged closer, putting himself between Victoria and Bastien as best he could. “We know you paid Penelope to sabotage Victoria.”

“I expect you know of what happened with Olivia, too,” Victoria added darkly.

Bastien's gaze flickered for a second, but then he doubled down. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Penelope confessed,” Drake bit back. Victoria could see he was shaking and she tried to pull her hand away from Bastien, but he held fast. “Don’t play dumb, Bastien. Please.”

“I am a servant of the crown,” Bastien replied carefully. “Why should I care who Liam chooses?”

“That’s exactly what I want to know,” Victoria said with a glare.

Bastien glanced and her and then back to Drake. Victoria could see Drakes face in profile as he came to a realisation.

“It wasn’t you pulling the strings was it?” He said. “Someone else had a hand in this and I want to know who.”

Bastien's eyes softened as he took in Drakes expression. “You don’t want to do this, son.”

Drakes face hardened again and he planted a hand on the front of Bastien's chest. “Don’t call me son.”

Bastien used his free hand to swat Drake away, his eyes dark and closed again. “It’s time to go.” Bastien turned from Drake, pulling Victoria with him.

“Hey!” Drakes shout rent the air and Victoria flinched. “We’ll go, but you get your hands-off her this instant.” Bastien dropped her arm, and Victoria automatically brought her bandaged hand to the spot to rub it. Bastien took in the hand and the white gauze wrapped around the wound that was hidden beneath it.

“You have to be careful Lady Victoria,” Bastien said darkly. “Someone really doesn’t want you here.”

Drake went to her and took her hand. “We know that much.” He said sharply. “But if you aren’t going to help then the least you can do is leave her alone.”

“Thank you for getting me to the hospital,” Victoria said with a stilted voice.

“This wasn’t personal,” Bastien said. “I swear it.”

“Feels pretty damn personal where I’m standing,” Drake said, starting for a back door that Bastien had directed them to.

“Liam knows what you did,” Victoria said finally to Bastien. “I hope all of this is worth it for you.” She walked with Drake but then he stopped when he heard a new voice. Victoria watched as Drake turned his head to stare at Bertrand Beaumont as he approached Bastien with a question as to where Liam was.

“ _You_.”

Drake immediately released Victoria and strode back to Bertrand, Victoria following closely. “Drake, wait!”

Bertrand had just enough time to take in the approaching, angry man and spied Victoria over his shoulder, before Drake came to a halt before him framing his entire view. “I found my sister.”

“Lady Savannah?” Bertrand asked, and Victoria saw a wealth of emotions scatter across his face, before settling into a neutral expression. “What splendid news. She is well, yes?”

“Drake…” Victoria warned, reaching for his arm. He snatched it back. “Drake!”

“Like you’d care.” Drake snarled down at Bertrand.

“Of course, I care,” Bertrand said, confused. “When she went missing, I was most concerned.”

“Save it,” Drake retorted. “She told me what happened between the two of you. Everything that went down.”

“I see,” Bertrand said, his face falling.

“She was in love with you!” Drake shouted. “How could you break her heart, you stuck up bastard?”

Victoria caught sight of Maxwell heading over, having heard the shout and taken in the scene. Some of the closest nobles were laughing softly at the drama unfolding just outside the party. She couldn’t see Liam anywhere and for a moment she wished he would appear to calm Drake down.

“Hey, let’s all just take a second and—” Maxwell tried.

“When Lady Savannah disappeared she eluded us all,” Bertrand was trying to explain. “Including myself. I took it to mean that she didn’t want to be found.”

“Oh yeah?” Drake asked, jabbing a finger at Maxwell. “He knew where she was.”

“Maxwell?” Bertrand gaped, then his face turned stern again. “Maxwell Percival Beaumont, is that true?”

Victoria tried to move between them all, keeping a hand up in front of Drake and stepping to put her other between the brothers. “Can everyone please be calm?”

“Maxwell?” Bertrand pressed ignoring her.

“I, well…” Maxwell said, the guilt written all over him. “Yes, a little bit.”

“Maxwell actually had the decency to support her,” Drake growled. “Which is more than you’ve ever done.”

“How?”

Maxwell shrugged and rubbed at the back of his neck. “Turns out my excessive spending habit was a bit of a ruse. I sent pretty much all the missing money to her.”

“Maxwell…” Bertrand floundered. “I had no idea.”

“Now you know,” Drake said. “You always thought he was the screw-up, but he was just covering up for you and your mistakes.”

“Drake, you have to stop,” Victoria said turning so that she was entirely in between him and Bertrand. “Come on, you’ve said enough now, don’t say something you’ll regret.”

“What’s going on?” Bertrand asked sharply. “What am I missing?”

“Drake don’t—”

“Savannah has been busy raising your kid, you stupid man.” Drake snapped over Victorias head. She closed her eyes. There it was.

Bertrand couldn’t speak for a few moments. “A… a child?”

Maxwell nodded and put his hand on his brothers shoulder. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I wanted to.”

“I didn’t know she was pregnant,” Bertrand said.

“Oh please,” Drake snarled. “You gave Savannah that whole speech about how you two could never be together. It’s awfully convenient.”

“That wasn’t your news to tell,” Victoria said quietly. Drake finally looked at her, his eyes cold.

“Somebody had to be honest for once.”

“Drake, I assure you,” Bertrand said sounding utterly dejected. “I had no idea. She misunderstood my meaning.”

“That’s bullshit.” Drake snapped, pushing past Victoria to grab Bertrand by his shirt.

“Unhand me!” Bertrand warned.

“You broke my sisters’ heart, I ought to beat you bloody!” Drake cried, clenching his fist. Victoria launched and wrapped her hands around his wrist. She could feel the taut muscles, the tendons straining.

“Stop it,” Victoria tried.

Maxwell pushed at Drakes other hand, putting himself in front of Bertrand. “Please don’t Drake.”

“Get out of my way, both of you.” Drake snapped.

“Drake, ease off, please,” Maxwell said as calmly as he could. Victoria moved one hand to his upper arm, curling around the muscle.

“Drake, please don’t do anything stupid.” She murmured.

He’d been so quiet and still just observing that Victoria had almost forgotten that Bastien was still there, but now he stepped closer.

“That’s enough.” He barked. “All of you, out now.”

Drake released Bertrand and he rearranged his collar. “Thank you, Bastien, for restoring order.”

“I mean all of you, Your Grace,” Bastien said. Bertrand's mouth fell open, but then he snapped it just indignantly.

“Very well. Come on Maxwell.” He said. “Let’s get going. But King Liam will be very disappointed to have to wait for the news I’m bringing.” With a haughty head tilt, he turned and headed away. Maxwell gave Victoria a small wave and she threw back a tiny, sad smile.

“And now you two,” Bastien said pointing to the door.

Victoria glanced at Drake with wide eyes, unsure if he even wanted to go with her. “Come on Drake.” He didn’t move, didn’t even look at her, so she released him and headed for the door by herself.

The night air outside was chilly and dark. Victoria shivered and started for the cars that were waiting nearby.

“Hey Quinn, wait up.” She turned with a look of shock on her face to see Drake approaching. “Just had to swipe a bottle of that fine whiskey.” He said gesturing to his coat, which was hiding the bulge of the bottle.

“I didn’t think you’d want to stick with me after that,” Victoria said quietly. Drake gave her a sombre look.

“I’m… sorry Quinn. I was an idiot back there.”

“I’ve never seen you so worked up,” Victoria replied, wrapping her arms around herself. He noticed her chill and shrugged off his jacket, placing it over her shoulders. She could feel the hard lump of her phone in the breast pocket. The combination of gestures made her want to cry. “Thanks.”

“Come on, let’s get back to the train,” Drake said. “I need to get myself under control.”

*

The ride back was quiet. It wasn’t until they were at the train and he was walking her to her room that Drake spoke. “First Bastien, now the Beaumonts.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Can we trust anyone here?”

Victoria didn’t know what to say. They reached her door and she turned to him, still wearing his jacket draped over her. “I don’t know. Do you trust me?”

Drake looked down at her with a face as open as she’d ever seen it. “Of course, I do, Quinn. What a question.”

Victoria opened her door and stepped through. “Thanks for walking me back. And for the jacket.”

“And for the glass of whiskey?” Drake suggested. “If you’re up for it that is?”

“Sure.” They headed inside and shut the door. Victoria slid the jacket from her shoulders and handed it back as Drake set down the bottle. Her hand brushed Drakes as he took the jacket and she held it there for a moment. A small flicker of electricity sparked at their touching skin. She slowly raised her eyes to Drakes, to find that his warm brown eyes were dark and stormy. If she kissed him now would he still taste of that whiskey? If she just looked at Drake, if it was just him and her inside this tiny compartment, she could forget everything else. She could persuade herself that Liam wasn't thinking about her and so she could avoid thinking about him. He was engaged. She was not. She moved to grasp Drakes hand, but then he took his jacket and slung it over the back of the chair that he dropped into, sighing loudly. Victoria took her hand back, her heart racing at their contact and found a single glass at the small washstand. She set it down.

“Sorry, there’s only one glass.”

“That’s OK,” Drake said with a slight drawl to his voice. “We can fight over it.”

Victoria sniggered and sat on her bed to remove her shoes. A thought struck her and before she could think better of it she flashed Drake a smile. “Or how about a drinking game?” She suggested. “You up for that?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter has been one of my favourites for years and years and it's by the Hoosiers. 
> 
> Oof ok so first I'm sorry this was updated so late. It's been a struggle for a while (not just me I mean, it's kind of a worldwide thing, this strange time!) and I've got three kids at home with me so finding time to write has been hard. My kids I mean, not random kids. 
> 
> Ok so the chapter. You know my motto with this fic is: "the game has bad moments and I'm going to make them worse." And so I have. Bad decisions abound. Liam and Drake have their first real falling out. I know they don't in the game, but it kind of made sense for my fic. Unless you reveal you are in love with Drake during the proposal Liam has no idea in-game, but that just paints him as a bit self-involved, when he's not, so let's make everyone miserable instead. That's better, right?


	13. I Can't Be With You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A drinking game, an unforgettable night and the morning after... 
> 
> **smut incoming**

_And my head, and my head, On anyone’s shoulder  
‘Cause I can’t be with you_

Drake poured the whiskey into the glass and it sat between them on the small table. Victoria kicked her shoes under the bunk and explained the rules. It was simple really. Each would declare something they had never done before and if the other had done the thing, then they would take a drink. The other rule was no talking about courtly business. No fretting about sisters, or bodyguards, or Kings or nobles. “This is a Drake Walker and Victoria Quinn only zone.” She finished. “Everyone and everything else stays outside of that door.”

Victoria realised her heart was pounding. She felt like she had been walking a very fine line recently, wobbling onto dangerous territory with her flirting. This was a leap right off the knifes edge. It was a little scary and a lot exciting.

“OK, _Victoria_ ,” Drake said stressing her name. Victoria wrinkled her nose. “Yeah it sounds weird when I call you that, doesn’t it?”

“It usually means I should be worried,” Victoria replied. “It means you’re angry or scared for me. Or,” she quirked her mouth into a wry smile. “that you’ve let your guard down and you might be about to kiss me.”

Drake stared back at her over the table. “Are we playing or what?” was all he said.

Victoria considered her first question as she poured three fingers of whiskey. “Never have I ever… been on a sinking boat.”

Drake chuckled ruefully. “That’s an unfair advantage; you can’t use Liam's stories about our misspent youth against me.”

“I can, too, you know what they say about loose lips and sinking ships.” Victoria pouted. “Drink up.”

He knocked the contents of the glass back and set the glass down for Victoria to refill. “Fine, that’s one to you. My turn.” Now it was Drakes turn to think. “Never have I ever been set up with someone.”

“I suppose that counts,” Victoria said, taking the glass and taking a big swallow. “Yikes, I forgot how fiery that was. What do you think the distillers would think of us using old expensive whiskey for a cheap game?”

“I hope they’d be impressed.” Drake joked. “You’re up.”

Victoria tilted her head to one side to think. “Never have I ever been a prince’s handsome best friend.”

Drake rolled his eyes. “There is more to me than being Liam's friend, you know.”

“I am aware of that, but are you saying that you admit you’re handsome?” Victoria asked with a slow smile. Drake hesitated before taking his drink.

“I don’t even know how to respond to that.”

“By being flattered.” Victoria insisted. “And taking a drink.” He watched her over his rim as he drank. “Two- one, Mr Walker.”

“Soon to be two-all, Lady Victoria,” Drake replied. “Never have I ever pretended it was my birthday when it actually was the birthday of a princes’ handsome best friend.”

Victoria chuckled. “That’s awfully specific.” She finished the drink and then held the glass for Drake to refill. “I’m going to have to bring my A-game to this I see. OK. Never have I ever…” an idea came to mind and she let out a soft chuckle as she peered up at him from beneath her lashes. “…imagined someone in this room naked.”

Drakes mouth opened as redness blossomed on his neck. “Damn, Quinn.” He said wrapping his hand around the glass and taking a long drink. “You never go easy on me.”

“Easy is no fun,” Victoria said, resting her forearms on the table and leaning forward. Drake set the glass down and pushed it across to her.

“You’re gonna need this in a moment,” he promised and leaned forward, matching her position. “Never have I ever taken advantage of a barn raising to stare at someone with their shirt off.”

Victoria looked down and bit her lower lip. “Wow, was I that transparent?” She reached for the glass and once again brushed her fingers across his as he delayed releasing his hold on the glass.

“What’s the expression?” Drake pretended to think. “Eyes on stalks?” He watched her drink and hide her smile behind the glass.

“You could have kept your shirt on, you know.” Victoria retorted. “I did.”

Drake shrugged and sat back against the chair. “Maybe I wanted you to look.”

Victoria felt her throat constrict momentarily. “What’s the score?”

“Three to you and three to me,” Drake said. “What are we playing until?”

“It’s sudden death, pal,” Victoria said. “Whoever loses next loses the whole game.”

“I don’t know,” Drake said thoughtfully. “If we’re both drinking and having fun then I say we’re both winners.”

“Ah, the words of a man who knows he’s going to lose!”

“Bring it on, Quinn.”

Victoria grinned at his cockiness. This plan to get their mind off everything outside of the small room was working better than she’d hoped. Both were much more relaxed as long as they remained ensconced in their escapism. “Never have I ever,” she threw Drake a coy look. “had a scandalous dream about the two of us in bed together.”

Drake didn’t move as he stared her down. “You really play for keeps, Quinn. I’m kind of impressed.”

“Ah a rare compliment from Drake Walker,” Victoria said, her fingers dancing around the glass tumbler. “And?”

For a moment Drake didn’t move. His eyes were locked onto hers and then he reached for the glass. Victoria tried to play it cool, but a flush of excitement made her draw a trembling breath. “Knew it.” She bluffed as he drank.

“Don’t get too cocky,” Drake said setting the glass back down. “I have another chance to equalise.”

“If you lose maybe you can tell me about that dream,” Victoria said. Drake chuckled throatily.

“Never have I ever… stolen a book from a library.” He said. Victoria laughed.

“Sorry Drake, neither have I.” She said pushing the drink back to him. “That book was a gift.”

Drake winced. “Ah, shit I knew that.” He picked up the drink and knocked it back. The bottle was half empty. “I guess you win.”

Victoria sat up and folded her arms, lifting one finger to her lips. “I wonder what I’ve won.”

“I thought you wanted me to tell you about that dream,” Drake said. And then, she couldn’t quite believe it, he admitted: “Actually it was a series of dreams.”

“Oh?” Victoria said. Her heartbeat was racing with whiskey and lust. “Now that is interesting.”

Drake cocked his head as he considered her. “Have you really never pictured me naked or dreamt about us?”

Victoria looked down. “Maybe I have.”

“So, you cheated, Victoria Quinn?” Drake said, mock scandalised. Victoria shrugged and looked back up.

“I guess I did.” She admitted, biting down on her pinky finger coyly. “I don’t know what got into me.”

Drake swallowed hard as he considered her and shifted in his chair. “That’s, er, good to know.” Drake stood and grabbed his jacket. “I should probably get going.”

Victoria stood up, disappointed. “Or… you could stay?” All her flirting fled and she stood before him with large blue eyes and heat in her cheeks. Cards on the table. “I’d like that.”

Drake looked away. “I shouldn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because… because Liam…” Drake started.

Victoria strode up to him and stood before him so he was forced to look at her. He wasn’t at tall as Liam, though without her heels she was still smaller than him.

“Liam isn’t here. It’s just you and me, Drake.” She said in little more than a whisper. Liam wasn’t here; all she could see was the man before her and the whiskey singing in her veins brought a new beat to her heart. Where once it had maintained a steady rhythm of Liam's name, now it thumped for Drake. She was ready to jump. “I want you.”

“Damn it, Victoria,” Drake dropped his jacket and pushed her against the wall, his mouth finding hers and kissing her forcefully. He really did taste like that whiskey after all. Victoria moaned into his mouth, her hands slipping behind his neck and tugging him closer. His hands were on her waist, gripping her tightly as he pressed up against her. She could feel his arousal and her teeth scraped gently against his lip. He pulled back slightly, his eyes searching hers. She was falling and he was hesitating. She needed to drag him down with her. She needed his touch in a way she had never needed anyone else before. If she was to drown then she would drown with him.

“Drake,” she breathed. “Please.”

With another groan, he sank his lips onto her neck, brushing that heavenly black hair aside. She let out a tiny noise. Drake knew that he could stop and walk away. They hadn’t crossed any lines yet. There was time to pull the brakes, but he also knew that he didn’t want to. He wanted to make good on all those dreams, all the pent-up desire. She was here and she was willing and eager if the noises she was making were anything to go by and she was all his if just for this night. There was no way he was letting this opportunity slip through his fingers.

Victoria’s heart was speeding away from her and all she could feel was Drakes lips on her skin, his hands on her body. She didn’t want to take this slowly. She wanted more and she wanted it right now. She tugged at his shirt and pulled it loose from the waist of his trousers. Pulling at the buttons because her head was wild and wouldn’t let her fingers work them, she managed to undo the top three before tugging it up. Drake obliged and let her yank the shirt over his head. She roamed her gaze over his chest, the muscles she had observed back at the barn raising. Now she was free to stare and so she did.

“Are you sure you want this?” Drake asked. She could hear the sincerity in his voice. He would stop if she said to. She reached for his chest and gently scratched her nails from his neck to his belt buckle, making him writhe at her touch. “Quinn!”

She bored her gaze into his, breathing hard and started to finger his belt, but he moved her hand. “Not yet. You are overdressed.”

Victoria felt a shudder and a thrill at his authoritative words. She undid the button at her neck and then pulled at the stretchy dress until it was pooled down at her feet and then she stepped out of it wearing only her underwear. Drakes breath hitched as he took in the extent of her body.

“You’re so gorgeous, Quinn.” He said. She put out her hand and gently pushed him back, advancing on him. The car was small and within seconds he was tripping back to sit on the bed. Victoria straddled him, one thigh either side and lowered herself down. Drake groaned as she moved against him, straining against the denim.

“OK, now I’m regretting off my pants,” he breathed, laughter escaping his lips slightly higher than usual. “God, Quinn.”

He peppered kisses over her chest and Victoria felt his arm move behind her. She grabbed him by the elbow and pulled him back. His eyes held regret, but she dipped down to soothe him with kisses, even as she pushed him back so that he had to brace himself on his arms, keeping them far away from her back. She reached behind herself to unclasp the hook and eye, slackening the material and shrugging it off. The lacy garment slithered to the floor and Drake opened his eyes as she broke their kiss and pulled back. His eyes slid down from her face and he pushed off his arms, making a new noise, somewhere between a growl and a moan and then he was holding her breasts and kissing them with wild abandon. Victoria threw back her head and moaned.

She had to move. Her back was open to the possibility of his touch and she couldn’t bear it. She cupped his chin, lifting his gaze from her chest to her face and kissed him once, before pushing off him and standing. Drake watched her, but realised what she was after when she reached for his arm and pulled him up, dancing around him until she could place herself on the bed. Drake swallowed hard.

He stood over her kicking off the dress shoes he’d resisted earlier, but now had to admit they were much easier to remove than his trusty boots. She watched as he pulled his belt undone and within moments he was down to his underwear. Victoria snaked one hand under the bed to withdrew her wash bag and tossed a condom at him. Drake smirked as he caught it. “Very prepared. I’m starting to feel like you seduced me.”

Victoria didn’t speak choosing instead to lay back against the pillow, raising one arm above her to drape over the pillow.

“Let’s make good on those dreams I had.” Drake removed his boxers and busied himself with the condom before breaching the gap between them to get closer. “If I remember rightly, they went a little something like this,” Drake said as he hooked his fingers in the waistband of her pants and slid them down over her legs and off her feet. Then he placed one hand on her hip and nudged her legs apart with the other. Victoria complied, her chest heaving as she took in shallow breaths.

It suddenly hit her that they were doing this. This was really happening right now.

Drake brought his mouth down on her thigh and kissed her, chasing it with a second a little higher, then a third. He kissed her up her thigh, over her hip, where he gave her a little nip and she squealed and squirmed. Then his kisses travelled over her stomach, up her abdomen and onto her nipple, which he took in his mouth, his eyes flicking up to look at her as she moaned and fluttered her eyelids. She reached her hand to his head, running her fingers through his hair. Drake came up to her face and met her lips with his, opening his mouth and she responded in kind. And then she let out a blissful, wordless cry as he entered her.

He wasted no time, moving steadily and surely, and she moved in time with him, creating a synchronicity. She clutched him and buried her face in his neck where he smelled so much like that whiskey. No clean citrus smell here. Victoria felt a wave of emotion crest and some of it was pleasant and some of it was sorrow. Drake wasn’t Liam. He didn’t feel like Liam, didn’t smell like Liam. She pushed away any thoughts of him; he wasn’t welcome here in this bunk, in this car. She needed to forget ever making love to Liam. She needed to get fucked.

“Harder,” she moaned. “Please.”

Victoria screwed her eyes tight and drew up her legs as Drake reached one hand up and grabbed the metal headboard of the inbuilt bunk. She could hear the metal grind with every thrust and every groan from Drake. She needed more, tightening her legs around him, gripping his face in her hands to draw him closer, biting his lip before moving her mouth lower.

“Quinn, God… Quinn…” He said against her hair as she kissed his neck and reached her hands up to scratch down his back. He made a wild noise and the thrusts increased in tempo and rigour. Victoria threw back her head against the pillow, crying out. Drake moved his free hand to her face, cupping her cheek so tenderly, so at odds with the primal way he was taking her. Victoria met his gaze for a moment; his eyes were so dark, but his focus was on her and he looked soft in the half-light.

“I never thought this would happen,” Drake said huskily. “I can’t believe I get to be here with you.”

Victoria bit him. She didn’t want gentle. Didn’t want romance.

“Harder,” she growled, closing her eyes and shutting him up with her mouth. He slid his hand down from her face to her breast, thumbing her nipple until she made that mewl again and that pushed him over the edge. His arm flexed as he gripped the bed and he lowered his head to her neck.

“Oh Quinn…” He uttered against her, his breath in her ear. Victoria clutched him to her as he pressed himself down against her and disappeared beneath him.

After a few moments of groans and growls, Drake relaxed, releasing the bed and pushing himself off her chest. Victoria gaze back up at him. “Quinn… you’re amazing.” He panted. “God, I can’t believe that just happened. Are you OK?”

“I’m good.” She assured him and he moved off her to sort himself out. Victoria lay in the cold absence of his body for a moment, then sat up and pulled the blanket around her shoulders.

“You’re not… rushing off are you?” She asked, feeling more vulnerable in that moment than when she’d asked him to stay or when she’d been naked underneath him.

Drake looked at her with a quizzical expression. “I probably should get out of here.” Her face fell, and he quickly added: “I can stay if you want.”

Her face brightened at once, and she reached for her underwear to pull them back on. Victorias bag was under her bed and she pulled it out so she could grab a t-shirt, not yet ready to share her scars with him even though he’d glimpsed them before. It was too big, too soon. She pulled it on and watched as Drake stepped back into his boxers. Then he hesitated.

“Come here,” she said, holding out her hand. Drake took her hand and let her pull him onto the bed beside her. Her hair was a wild black cloud around her head and her make up was smudged. Drake dropped a kiss to her lips.

“Quinn…” Then he corrected himself. “Victoria… I…”

“Would you stay the night with me?” She asked. Drake swallowed and nodded. They positioned themselves on the narrow bunk, him behind her, his arm curled around her and her fitting neatly against his body.

“I was scared I was moving too fast,” Drake said into the back of her neck after scattering some kisses across the private skin back there. “I was afraid of hurting you.”

“I’m tougher than I look,” Victoria said, lacing her fingers with his. He slipped an arm under her head and cradled her.

“I know you are.” Drake agreed with another kiss. “I’m so happy to be with you.”

*

When she woke it was disorientating at first. She hadn’t woken in the arms of anyone in such a long time. On the two occasions Liam had stayed with her while she fell asleep, he’d been up and dressed before she woke. Victoria had a horrible moment where she could not recollect whose arms were wrapped around her and her first reaction was panic. She slipped out of the arms and tumbled to her hands and feet on the ground; there wasn’t much room to move on the bunk. On the train. It all came back at once and she looked into Drakes sleeping face. He looked so soundly under. His face was relaxed in a way she had never seen and she looked away. It didn’t seem right to look upon him in such a vulnerable position. Victoria got slowly to her feet, unsure what to do next.

 _“I was watching over you.”_ She turned, but of course no-one was there. Liams voice was coming from her sleep-addled mind.

_“Now I’ve met you I know what love is.”_

_“I promise I will keep you safe.”_

“Stop it.” She whispered into the darkness, a command aimed at herself. Liams voice was right inside her ear, his touch on her skin even as she smelled of Drake. She hugged herself in the dark.

_“I would do anything for you, Victoria.”_

Victoria pressed her hands to her eyes until she saw stars. It did nothing to stem the flow of memories of words Liam had spoken to her. She backed away from the bed until she hit the wall and sank into the corner.

Victoria drew her knees up and lowered her head into her hands. She shook and shook and couldn’t seem to get warm, isolated in the room. It felt so lonely to share the room with a person and still be so alone.

After a time, she looked up again. Drake had rolled onto his back and was gently snoring. Victoria watched him, the barest moonlight eking through a gap in the blind on the train window. The movement of the carriage swayed her as she watched and made her feel like she was on a ship on the ocean instead of a train on the tracks. Drakes arm was slung over his forehead, the other dangling slightly off the bunk. He filled the space so completely that she could scarce believe they had fit together on the narrow bed.

They had fit together remarkably well. Her hips and thighs ached from their conjoined positioning. It had all gone so fast. So much build-up with the tension growing between them during that game and then it had burned so bright and so fierce that it was over before it began.

How different the men were. Best friends and she’d slept with both of them. Classic Victoria.

But she’d been with Liam when he’d been available and then with Drake when he wasn’t. She hadn’t done anything wrong, she told herself. She had made a choice and that choice had been Liam. It wasn’t her fault that her choice went up in smoke. All she was doing was trying to find a little piece of comfort in this horrible time. And yet, even as she rationalised it, she wondered why it was so important for her to justify her actions.

This thing with Drake wasn’t serious. There was no love between them, it was pure lust and they’d acted on it in a mature, eager and consensual fashion. What was the harm? She would be going back to New York soon enough and Drake belonged here with Liam so she wasn’t trying to cause a rift. She would never expect Drake to go with her. No, her plan involved clearing her name, then departing Cordonia forever, leaving the friends she’d made behind. Oh, it hurt to imagine that, but none of them belonged with her. She spoiled everything she touched. Cordonia was beautiful and she was not, so it was the right thing to leave them behind.

It was these thoughts that eventually lulled her into an uncomfortable half-sleep until morning.

When morning came, so too did a knock at the door.

Victoria started awake, her neck crying out at the sudden movement. She stiffly got to her feet and stumbled to the door.

“Victoria?” came Maxwell's muffled voice. “You awake?”

Victoria paused with her hand on the lock and a glance to the still sleeping Drake, who had rolled again and had his perfectly smooth back exposed to her, the blanket only just covering his boxers. Damn it.

“Victoria? Open the door-ia!” Maxwell called in a sing-song voice.

Victoria unlatched the door and slid it open a crack, her voice laced with urgency lest he wake her sleeping companion. “Maxwell not so loud—”

“Good morning,” Maxwell said not taking the hint and bustling inside the room before she could stop him. “Gosh, did you have a heavy night? I wanted to talk to you about Drake and all that mess. Do you think he hates me forever now?”

Victoria stood rooted in her spot by the open door as Maxwell turned around to continue speaking to her. “I want to apologise to him, but I want it to be just right. Will you help me?”

Victoria couldn’t look at him as he stopped talking and looked down where her dress and Drakes shirt were lying on the floor. “Victoria,” he chided jokingly. “Tidy home, tidy mind or something.” As he chuckled he looked up to her face and she knew, she could feel the guilty shadow on her features. Maxwell frowned and then his eyes flickered to the bed where Drake had been awoken by the chatter. He was rolling over, covering his lower body with the blanket. “Wha—?”

“Morning Maxwell,” Drake said gruffly. Victoria couldn’t look at either of them.

“Drake?” Maxwell asked as if unable to believe the sight before his eyes. He turned back to Victoria, now taking in her dishevelled appearance and scarce apparel. “Victoria?”

“Do you think you could give us a minute?” Drake asked, looking sardonically up at the Beaumont, who was still wrestling with the sight and the realisation.

“But I don’t understand,” Maxwell said.

“Well, I could use some pants before I even start talking to you, you see?” Drake retorted.

“Ah, Maxwell, you’re here.” Victoria’s heart lurched as Bertrand caught sight of his brother through the open door and then he was in the tiny room. Why hadn’t she closed the damn door? “Good. Lady Victoria, I have some exciting news!”

Bertrand was much quicker on the uptake that Maxwell, clocking the undressed states of both Drake and her and averting his eyes from both. “Ah.” He said. Victoria felt a sense of shame build from her toes all the way to her scalp. Somehow Bertrand's eyes on the scene made it all ten times worse. But why? Hadn’t she determined that there was nothing wrong with what they’d done?

“Victoria, I don’t get it?” Maxwell asked. “What about Liam?”

Victoria felt rage blast through every other sense as she turned to Maxwell. “What _about_ Liam? In case you’d forgotten, he’s getting married. I know you brought me here for him like some sort of present, but he decided I wasn’t quite worth it, after all, didn’t he?” Maxwell flinched at her tone. “But Drakes here and he was quite happy with me and frankly it’s nobody else's business.” Maxwell glanced at Bertrand and she stepped towards him, jabbing a finger in front of his shocked face. “This isn’t some grand fairy-tale and if you spent less time partying and more time growing up, then maybe you’d understand that.”

Maxwell looked down and Victoria squashed the voice in her head that was trying to chastise her for laying into him.

“You’re right,” he said numbly. “Sorry.” And he slipped between his brother and Victoria and left the room, bumping into Justin as he went.

Justin ducked briefly into the room with a: “what’s gotten into him?” but his sharp eyes widened as he took in the scene. “I see.” He said. “Bertrand, I’ll catch you later.” And he was gone.

Victoria bowed her head. Drake cleared his throat. “Pants? Anyone mind handing them to me.”

Victoria kicked them over to him.

“Why is Maxwell fleeing the length of the train?” Olivia asked as she and Hana entered the room. Victoria started laughing, there didn’t seem like there was anything better to do and if she didn’t laugh she would definitely cry. “Good heavens, Victoria, you have sunk to desperate levels.” Olivia quipped as she cocked an eyebrow at Drake. “Or have you?” She added, gazing at Drakes chest, until he made an obscene hand gesture at her and pulled the blanket higher.

Hana shot Victoria a sympathetic look. “I’ll go find Maxwell.” She said and then she was gone, polite as ever.

Olivia on the other hand crossed her arms and leaned against the door frame, amusement quirking her features.

Bertrand was still standing silently in the middle of the room.

Victoria didn’t quite know what to do. “You said you had some news, Bertrand?”

“Olivia, will you please turn around?” Drake snapped at the same time. Olivia smirked and Drake shot her a look of utter contempt as he slid his trousers on underneath the blanket.

“Bertrand?” Victoria asked again, as if it was totally normal that she was only wearing a slightly-longer-than-backside length t-shirt.

Bertrand cleared his throat softly. “I have news.” He said, with a sorrowful look. “Regarding the status of our Kings engagement.”

Victorias heart flipped over. “What do you mean?” She asked, barely able to hide her hope. She watched Drake look slowly up from the bed out of the corner of her eye. Even Olivia turned to Bertrand, her expression mixed.

“King Liam tasked me with looking into the law that requires our rulers to be engaged or married by their Coronation,” Bertrand explained. “He helped where he could and we found little to challenge. The law is pretty rock solid there. So we turned to other avenues. Looking for anything to exploit to render the engagement null and… well, we found it.”

Victoria's knees buckled and she landed in the chair. She didn’t even notice; her gaze was locked onto Bertrand's face. “What?”

“When Leo abdicated, he was still engaged to Madeleine,” Bertrand said. “Because of his abdication there was a lot of paperwork, plenty of legal ends to close and his abdication took precedence. But we found a document that is unsigned and which was apparently never quite finalised. It means that our Kings fiancee is actually still engaged to Leo.”

“But that… engaged isn’t married.” Victoria said weakly.

“A royal engagement is more than a ring,” Bertrand said. “It is a legally binding contract. And Madeleine is unable to maintain both at once and the former takes precedence.”

Drake sank his head into his hands.

“What are you saying?” Victoria asked. “I don’t…”

Bertrand fixed her with a kindly expression. “It means Liam can break the engagement without repercussions. In fact, he is legally obligated to do so. If he wanted to choose a new fiancée in this time, then he would be free to do so, providing all scandals against that person are closed. Do you understand me, Victoria?”

Drake did. He made an exasperated noise and stood, reaching for his shoes, shirt and jacket and storming from the room. Victoria watched him go, silently, with no urge to follow him. Olivia glanced at her. “I’ll… make sure he doesn’t throw himself off the train.” She said, sounding far less snarky towards Drake than she ever had before. That struck Victoria as a bad sign; if Olivia was feeling sorry for him then they had sank to new lows.

Victoria turned to Bertrand. “Liam was looking into this all this time?”

“He was.” Bertrand nodded. “He wasn’t prepared to let you go without a fight, even if that fight was behind the scenes.”

“Oh my God,” Victoria said, her hands covering her mouth. “Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

“I gather, His Highness was reluctant to get your hopes up,” Bertrand said. “And he was concerned you would feel pressured into continuing your relationship alongside Countess Madeleine's engagement with him.”

_“You want me to be what? Your mistress? You think I want that?”_

Her own words echoed in her head as she took in the information that Bertrand had given her.

“I thought…” Victoria felt her throat tighten uncomfortably. “I thought there was no hope for us. Where is Liam now?” Victoria asked, no thought to anyone but him in that moment.

“We are scheduled for a production at the opera when we reach Berlin,” Bertrand said. “We will be there within the next few hours.”

“Oh god, Drake.” Victoria cried as she leapt to her feet, looking to the empty bed. “He left, I didn’t…” Tears filled her eyes as her stomach clenched with guilt. “I should find him.” She looked to Bertrand's kind, tired eyes. “I didn’t mean to hurt anyone…”

“I know.” Bertrand sighed. “You didn’t have the full information at hand so you did the best you could.” His eyes were distant now, and Victoria got the strong sense that they were sharing something. The sensation of hurting people when you were working without a crucial piece of the puzzle. Victoria put her arms around him.

“I’m sorry about Savannah.”

“I’m sorry we didn’t tell you about the plan.”

They clung to each other on the gently rocking train, two people adrift in their own self-loathing.

“I should… probably put some clothes on.” Victoria said after a pause. Bertrand all but sprang back.

“Ahem, yes indeed.” And he left her room. She was alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by the inimitable band The Cranberries, who I adore. I Can't Be With You was my go-to sad song in my youth when I was dealing with unrequited crushes. So I listened to them a lot...! 
> 
> Ok, so yeah. That happened. I know in game Drake is far too good to go behind Liams back or complicate things for the MC during book two. I hope this doesn't feel like I've broken his character; my mantra is pushing everything that bit further as you know! Maybe having basically everyone wander in the morning after was a bit too far? I couldn't stop myself! 
> 
> With regards to the stuff Bertrand was investigating for Liam, I know there are behind the scenes reasons for the engagement (*cough* Anton *cough*) but that wouldn't be something they could find, so I gave them something to explore and a loophole to break L&Ms engagement honourably and whatnot. Or at least I hope I did and it's not too strange.


	14. Two Outta Three Ain't Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A discovery and a night at the opera. 
> 
> ***CW for panic attacks***

_I’ll never be able to give you something,  
Something that I just haven’t got_

The journey through the train was a long, arduous walk. Victoria was wearing loose, casual clothing, her hair was in a single plait down her back. She was dreading it; she hadn’t seen anyone since Bertrand had left her to get dressed. She had some big apologies to make.

It was a relief that the first person she saw on the way was Justin. Not someone who’d been her friend during the season, but someone who knew her since. She felt like his judgement of her choice to get together with Drake would be milder.

“Hey kid,” Justin greeted her with a smile, but it wasn’t one that quite reached behind his glasses. Victoria stopped, taken aback. “Glad to see you with a few more clothes on.” He quipped.

“Yeah, well, I was surprised before. You know, when I was in my private room where I had invited precisely none of you inside.” She responded archly. Justin chuckled.

“I’ll say you were surprised!” He said. Then he took her arm and turned her aside, stepping closer even though there was no-one around. “Look, kid, I know this probably feels really personal to bring up, but you can’t do that again. Everything we’re all working towards is getting your name cleared after what happened at Applewood and sexual encounters with roguish commoners is just going to muddy those crystal-clear waters.”

“I don’t remember asking you for your opinion on my sexual partners.” Victoria replied in a low voice.

“I’m here to get you back on top.” Justin said smoothly. “Clear your name and the name of your adoptive family. The Beaumonts are paying me a fair amount of money to fix the mistakes of the past for you and you know they don’t have tons of spare cash. Don’t you think you ought to be a bit more careful at least.”

Victoria frowned at his words. She knew he was working, that he was a paid associate and she trusted his judgement with the press, but this made her feel all kinds of dirty inside. She hadn’t done anything wrong. “I didn’t know that Liam could break the engagement.” She finally said. It felt like a weak argument.

“It’s great news, really tremendous.” Justin said eagerly. “It’s the best we could have hoped for to get you back with Liam. That’s what this is all about isn’t it? Getting you closer to Liam? Don’t jeopardise all that hard work, all those plans. OK?” He patted her on the arm and headed off, pulling his phone from his pocket and tapping the screen to bring it to life.

Victoria watched him go, feeling like she’d just gotten a dressing down from the principal. So much for her theory that he would be the least of her worries. She hesitated on the threshold to the carriage where the group had converged to discuss the latest findings. There was nothing else for it. She slid the door and headed inside.

“Where’s Drake?” Was the first thing he said as she realised the only absence.

Hana glanced around and then spoke. “We haven’t really seen him.”

Olivia shrugged. “I’m not sure we’ll see him again soon.”

Victoria nodded, her mouth twisting in worry. The plan to talk to him first was out then. She turned to Maxwell instead. “Maxwell? I’m so sorry for what I said. I can be such a bitch sometimes and I lashed out at you.” Maxwell took a deep breath, but he offered her a cautious smile.

“Already forgotten.” He said, standing and tucking her into his arms for a quick hug. Victoria held him tightly, pouring her sorrow into the motion as words were not her friend at this time. She wasn’t sure she quite believed him, but she would take whatever apology he could give her. Even when she didn’t think she deserved it.

She took a seat with everyone else. Bertrand filled the others in on the news that Victoria and Liam could be a real possibility if they could clear the scandal and uncover the conspiracy. Olivia watched with a shrewd expression. Victoria half wanted to suggest to Olivia that she be the one to go after Liam; that way Olivia could be happy and maybe Victoria wouldn’t feel like she’d screwed over Drake. But she didn’t. She wasn’t selfless and now she knew she could still have him, all she wanted was to see Liam again. See if they could fix what had been broken and get back on the same path. It seemed like a million years ago that she had had doubts over them, although she had to admit that those niggling doubts hadn’t vanished. Shrunk perhaps, but they were still there. She still didn’t know his birthday after all.

The group managed to avoid the subject of Drake with everyone voicing aloud that they assumed Victoria would be working towards getting back together with Liam and she didn’t correct them. An attendant interrupted them after around forty minutes of discussion to announce that they would soon be in Berlin and that the opera was scheduled to begin at seven o’clock, given how long a production The Magic Flute was.

Bertrand thanked the man and then rubbed his hands together. “Ah, _Die Zauberflöte_.” He said. “Admittedly not my favourite opera, but definitely a good one.”

“You would think being in the heart of Germany we would get to see something by Wagner,” Olivia sniffed. “I much prefer the tragedies.”

“Have you ever been to the opera, Victoria?” Hana asked, taking in her blank look.

“Me? No.” Victoria admitted. “Living in New York had it’s benefits so I’ve been to the theatre a lot.”

“Isn’t that expensive? How’d you swing that?” Maxwell asked without thinking and Olivia rolled her eyes at his insensitivity.

“It was.” Victoria said. She didn’t care what Maxwell said to her; he could stand on a chair pointing and laughing at her former poverty for all she cared. “But I made sure to keep friends in high places so they could score me standing room if not actual seats.”

Maxwell decided to cover up his faux pas by giving Victoria a rundown of the two act opera and he’d just gotten to the scene where Tamino played his flute to make the forest animals dance, when the door opened and Drake entered. “Quinn, I’ve figured it out.”

Victoria rose from her seat at once as everyone spun their heads to look at Drake. His face was serious and intent. “Drake…”

“Drake are you alright?” Hana asked.

Drake waved his hand dismissively, but his eyes lingered just over Victorias shoulder as if he couldn’t look directly at her. He had had a shower and smelled freshly of cedar wood. The scent of his shower gel wafted around Victorias head, making her feel dizzy. “Look, just listen. Bastien wouldn’t tell us who gave him the order to do all that messed up stuff to you and you, Olivia, right?”

“Right.” Victoria said quietly.

“Well, there is only a tiny list of people who Bastien would be compelled to answer to.” Drake said. “Really tiny. I don’t think even Liam could have gotten him to do something without approval.”

“Approval?” Victoria asked feeling too fuzzy headed by Drakes sudden appearance to follow his line of thinking, but Olivia got it.

“You’re saying this goes right to the top?” She said.

“Right,” Drake nodded turning to the redhead. “And that leaves two people.”

“The Queen Mother and the King Father.” Olivia supplied. Victoria sank back down to her seat.

“Are you joking?” She said, feeling faint.

“It makes sense.” Olivia said sadly. “For Christs’ sake. Why didn’t I see it before?”

“So it’s one of those two?” Hana asked, her face drawn with concern. Drake shook his head.

“I doubt it.” He said, looking straight at Victoria. “Bastien answers primarily to Constantine. That’s the one. That’s who engineered all this.”

Victoria felt her heart sink into her stomach. That hope for a future with Liam, getting him back and living happily ever after that had flared was suddenly doused. How on earth could they fight back against a conspiracy headed by the King Father? She kept herself very still and rose slowly.

“OK, so now we know.” she said flatly. Quietly. Her head angled towards the floor. It was too much of an effort to try to raise her gaze. “Thanks Drake. I best go get ready for the opera. Might as well look smart while I tell Liam his father betrayed us. That’ll be fun.”

She headed for the door, leaving the others behind. There was nothing more to say. She hadn’t realised she had a shadow until Drake spoke.

“Quinn?” He said when they were in the corridor. “Are you alright?”

“Not particularly.” She answered honestly as they walked. “I kept thinking that once we had a name it would be easy, but I never expected that name.”

“I know,”

They reached her room and she stopped at the door, turning and catching his eye before he could look away. “Are _you_ alright?”

“I’m…” Drake exhaled and ran his hand over his hair. “I don’t know how I am. Last night was…”

“Wait, come inside to talk.” Victoria said hurriedly opening the door and rushing inside.

It felt a little like returning to the scene of a crime to have Drake back in her room so soon. It still smelled like him, not him now, but him last night. It had only been a few hours since he’d stormed from the room. Victoria decided she might as well ask the question that had been plaguing her. 

“Drake? Did you know?” She asked cautiously. “About what Liam and Bertrand were looking for?”

Drake considered her for a long while, rubbing his palm along his jaw. “Not all of it.” He said finally. “I had an idea that they were looking into it, but I didn’t know they’d found anything.”

Victoria looked down, folding her arms across her front. She’d trusted him throughout these past weeks, believed he was truly on her side. This felt uncomfortably like a betrayal. “Damn it, Drake.” She said quietly. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Drakes eyes were sorrowful when she looked up and met his gaze. “You want the truth, Quinn? The whole truth?”

Victoria nodded her head slowly. His lip trembled as he breathed out before speaking. “I’m in love with you.”

Victoria immediately reacted with a scoff. “No, you aren’t.”

“Quinn… _Victoria_ … I love you.” He reached for her and she flinched, but he placed his hand on her neck and leaned closer. “I loved you back before all the shit with Tariq went down. I loved you when I dragged him off you. I’ve loved you this whole time. And I know you came here to be with Liam and you love him, but I think… given the chance… you could love me back.”

Victoria shook her head. Her body was shaking and she couldn’t seem to stop it. “No, you can’t. You’ve always been so hard on me.”

“That was my stupid way of keeping you at a distance.” Drake said. “You know that. We had that moment at the Coronation Ball, before you went inside. Don’t you remember?”

Her mind flashed back to them outside the palace together, him confessing that he’d tried to keep his walls up around her, him asking her to kiss him. “Of course, I remember.” She whispered.

“I was prepared to let you go to Liam with a fight.” Drake said, his words picking up urgency as he spoke. His fingers worked around tendrils of her hair. “Because I didn’t feel I had anything to fight with. Liam promised you a crown and a country and all the protection in the world, but when it came down to it, he couldn’t give anything to you. And I’ve been here this whole time watching you and helping you and even though I want to clear your name, I don’t want to see you go back to Liam. That’s the truth of it.” Drake was breathing hard, his eyes were suspiciously wet. “This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done because you know what he means to me, but I don’t want you to go to him. I want you to stay with me.”

Victoria uncrossed her arms and in a jerky motion clasped either side of his face. He dipped his head to kiss her palm as it drew closer and tears spilled into her hand. “Drake,” she said, her own tears welling in response to his open pain. “Last night was…”

“ _Incredible_.” Drake said fiercely.

“It was.” She nodded. “I wanted you so badly. There’s a part of me that still does, but my heart isn’t mine to give away. I don’t think I could stop loving Liam even if I live to be a hundred and he marries every other eligible noble in the world.” Drake bowed his head, but she lifted him so she could look in his eyes. “I’m so sorry. Even if Liam doesn’t want me or we can’t fight Constantine, I’m going back to America and I’m don’t intend to take anyone with me.”

“I would follow you.” Drake said in a murmur. “In a heartbeat.”

“But you belong here. In Cordonia. With Liam and with Savannah and Bartie.” Victoria said. “I couldn’t take you away from your life without being able to offer you something in return, and I can’t. I can’t love you like you want me to.”

Drake moved back, stepping out of her reach. He rubbed his eyes and looked away, shutters flying up, closing off to her. “OK Quinn. I understand.”

“Drake, thank you for everything.” Victoria said. Her words sped away from her in a great rush as if they were able to slip through his defences before he shut himself off forever. “I’ll understand if you don’t want to see me anymore, but I value your friendship, I truly do.” It felt so weak to say, but how could she pour everything he meant to her into words?

Drake shrugged. “My hearts just bruised, not broken.”

Victoria nodded, but she didn’t buy it. He was attempting an easy grin, but it looked painful. She didn’t know how to help him, so she stayed back. Drake swiped the whiskey bottle that was still on the table from last night. “You go enjoy the opera, I’ll drink. Good times for all.”

He headed for the door.

“I have to tell Liam about us,” Victoria said. “He should know the truth; he might not want me anymore anyway.”

“It won’t make a difference,” Drake paused on the threshold, thumbing the doorframe. “You could sleep with the whole court and I’d still want to be yours. You’re… special, Quinn.” Victoria watched him disappear out of the door and then she flung herself on the bed and wept in earnest.

*

The opera house in Berlin was beautiful. The November night had brought a few wisps of early snow, so Victoria was glad of the faux fur stole she wore around her shoulders. The gown she wore was silver tiered lace, with ruffles over the skirt that fell in layers to the ground. Its shape reminded her of the waterfall that Victoria and Liam had spent an afternoon exploring back in the summer. The gown had a round neckline and no sleeves and the bodice was embroidered all over with crystals dotted here and there. Her hair was up in her basic chignon with tiny sparkles wound into her locks by Hana. Finishing off her look were a pair of delicate silver sandals which were making her toes freeze in the cold German Autumn and a pair of elbow-length gloves. She’d had to removed her bandage to fit them on, but her wrist only had a few small stitches and was healing nicely. Maxwell and Hana had declared her fit for the opera. She felt like the fairy from the top of a Christmas tree, and as much as she hated to admit it, she liked it.

On their way into the foyer, Maxwell explained that he had arranged for her to have a few moments of time with Liam who would be waiting in box five and was expecting her. She nodded and headed up. It was time.

It was one of those strange situations where until he drew back the curtain and ushered her inside, she had no idea what she was going to do. And as it happened, she took one look at him standing before her, and without a seconds thought, she was in his arms. “Oh Liam,” she managed before bursting into tears.

Liam, to his credit, was perfectly calm as she flung herself at him and started crying. He wrapped his arms warmly around her, stroking her hair and holding her.

“Shh,” he murmured, not even knowing the reason for her tears. “It’s alright.”

“Liam,” Victoria managed through quiet sobs. “I’ve screwed everything up.” She sniffed. “I’ve missed you so much and I had no idea that you and Bertrand were trying to find a way out of your engagement. I… I gave up on us. I thought this was over. I thought there was no way for us to be together ever again.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Liam said into her hair as he kissed her on the top of her head. “I was so afraid it would get your hopes up for nothing and it was bad enough for me. I felt sure we’d never find anything.”

Victoria pulled back to look up at him. “But you did.”

“We did,” Liam replied firmly. “I don’t intend to do anything about it just yet. I want to make sure you’re closer to finishing this conspiracy once and for all, first. Is that alright with you?”

Victoria lowered her gaze and stepped away. “About that…” She sighed. “Liam, I have so much to tell you and I don’t think any of it’s good.”

Liam looked out over the theatre as the lights flickered on and off. “The show is due to start. Would you like to stay here?”

Victoria frowned. “Madeleine isn’t coming?”

He shook his head. “No. There was some issue with travel arrangements and she insisted on dealing with it in person. But her inability to delegate is to our benefit. That is if you want to stay?”

Victoria just nodded and Liam lead her to the seats. She sat in the chair and her fingers worked nervously in her lap as butterflies soared in her stomach. Liam looked over at her with concern. “Can I get you anything? A drink perhaps?”

She shook her head quickly. “No. Thank you.” Victoria swallowed, her mouth perversely going dry at the thought of water. She just needed to say what she had come to say. “Liam… I’m not sure where to begin.” She rubbed her hands over her arms as if she were cold, scratching at her wrists. She couldn’t get to her nails under the gloves or no doubt she would have been biting them she knew.

“Did you discover something?” Liam asked. “I waited for you after the Stag, but you had already gone.”

Victoria flushed automatically, her brain flicking to her and Drake and their night. “Yeah, we, er, we confronted Bastien. He wasn’t very helpful.”

“That’s disappointing,” Liam said. “I’ll speak to him myself—”

“No need.” Victoria interrupted. “Drake figured it out.” Her voice cracked on the name. “Liam…” Victoria turned in her chair as the orchestra sprang to life for the opening song. “It was your father. He’s behind everything.”

“What?” Liams voice was a symphony of shock, anger and confusion. His face went thought each emotion, until he finally slumped into his chair. His hand rose up and pressed to his temple. “It can’t be… why would he do something like this?”

“I guess he just really hated me,” Victoria said in barely a whisper.

Liam shook his head. “He has no reason to. And even if he did, he is… he _was_ the King of Cordonia. Kings can’t allow spite to guide their actions. He must have had some other reason for doing this to you.” Liam reached over and took Victorias hand. “To _us_. I need to know what.” Liam's eyes were steely as he gazed at Victoria.

“Is there an… us?” Victoria almost didn’t dare ask. Liam slipped from his chair to kneel beside hers and pull her into a new embrace.

“If you want me,” Liam said fervently. She could feel his throat hum with his words and she closed her eyes to let the feeling wash over her. “I’m yours. I want to be with you from now until the end of our lives. ”

Victoria winced. Her longing to look up and kiss him was at war with the thought of the other thing she had to tell him. It wasn’t fair. She’d pulled away from him and let him go, but that was a lie. She had never detached from him, even knowing she couldn’t have him and now she had possibly spoiled everything. “Liam? I slept with… someone.”

His grip didn’t change. “That doesn’t matter to me.”

Victoria believed him. If she were confessing to a random hook up Liam wouldn’t care. He wasn’t possessive and they weren’t together. It really wouldn’t matter to him. She swallowed and in a broken voice finished her confession: “I slept with Drake.”

It was followed by the longest moment. A singer below held a note that rang through Victoria's ears as she waited for a sign that Liam was going to react. He had completely frozen in place, she could barely see his chest rising as he drew breath. “Liam?”

His name broke the spell and he stood, backing into his chair to sit down as the note finished and the aria continued. Victoria was now the frozen one as she watched him deal with this second bombshell. Liam shifted in his seat, straightening his cravat and fiddling with his tie pin, clearing his throat over and over. Victoria felt her fingers return to their pattern of anxiously scratching at her arms. “Liam, please say something.”

“When?” He managed. Victoria winced.

“Last night,” she replied softly. Guiltily.

“Oh,” Liam said. His face was forward, eyes fixed on the actors below. Victoria couldn’t seem to get her heart to stay steady; it was pounding against her rib cage.

“I didn’t know there was a chance for us.” She whispered, urgently. “I thought there was no hope. And I’ve missed you so much. And… I knew Drake was attracted to me. I didn’t intend to hurt either of you. I’m so sorry.”

Liam turned to look at her and she could see no malice in his eyes, though his voice was hollow. “Victoria, you don’t have to apologise for anything. There’s nothing to forgive. You are free to do as you wish… it’s me who should be sorry for being the cause of your misery. How can I begrudge you finding some happiness and peace during this hard time?” Victoria’s brows furrowed as she listened, somewhat disbelievingly. “I just… it’s hard to hear that you found solace in the arms of my best friend. I had no idea he … do you… love him?” There was so much hanging on that question that Victoria thought she might have been able to reach between them and touch the weight of those words.

“No.” She said. “It wasn’t like that for me.”

Liam caught her meaning. “For you? And for him?”

Victoria looked down into her lap. “He told me he loved me today. But he’s wrong. How could he? How could _you_?”

“Victoria.” Liam murmured.

Victoria made a jerky movement, half shrug, half hugging herself pulling away. “I don’t believe him. He called me Quinn the whole time and I kept my scars hidden. It wasn’t like what we had, Liam. He’s not what I want, I just hate the thought of hurting him. I’ve messed everything up.” She sank her head into her hands. “I always mess everything up.”

She heard a rustle and then Liam was back kneeling before her, gently pulling her head into his chest. “You haven’t done anything wrong.” He said softly. “You’ve been dealing with hardships that would have broken the most resilient of people. You have done nothing wrong, my darling.”

“Haven’t I?” Victoria's voice was muffled against his chest. “House Beaumont’s reputation is in ruins because of me. You are currently facing a loveless marriage. If I hadn’t been here then you could have found someone who was both suitable and whom you could have loved. Drake claims to have all these feelings for me that I just can’t reciprocate and what’s worse is that it might even sour your relationship with him. I should never have come here.”

Liam hugged her close as she fretted. It was only the surface of her worries and doubts; inside her head, the spectre of Jimmy was rising yet again, the ghost that haunted her more than any other. She could feel his cold, angry eyes upon her. He had always known that she was nothing but trouble, a waste of space. She had travelled all way to the east coast to get away from that ghost and thought maybe she’d finally escaped him completely in Cordonia with Liam, who had shone a light on her, who had made her feel like she might actually be worthy of loving.

She hadn’t gotten away. Jimmy was always with her.

“Liam, I don’t know what to do.” She admitted, trying to drown out the memory of her fathers words. “I’m so scared. I don’t see how we can fight your father.” _Or mine_. Jimmy loomed large so that when she pulled back from Liam she felt she could see him leering down over the top of them, greater than any other man and pouring with vitriol. She felt wet on her arm and when she looked, she could see red blooming through the silk of her glove. “Oh, no.”

Liam followed her gaze. “You’re bleeding.” He took action immediately, pulling off the glove.

“I’ve ruined it.” She worried. “They spent so much money on clothes for me and now I’ve gone and stained it. That will never come out!” Liam pulled his pocket square out of his blazer pocket and shook it out, wrapping it around her arm.

“It’s alright,” he murmured, as he pressed his hand against the newly reopened wound. “You need to hold your arm aloft.” He explained, holding her hand up above her head for her, still keeping pressure around her wrist. 

Victoria started to shake all over, uncontrollably fast and she clutched at Liam's arm with her free hand. Her breath was shallow, her pulse leaping. She knew deep down what this was, but even with the knowledge she had no grasp of the reins of this runaway horse. She couldn’t catch her breath and her left hand flew to her throat, tugging at her dress, gasping for air.

Liam reached his hand around and deftly unhooked the small catch at the back of the neckline, loosening her dress at her throat.

“Victoria, I think you’re having a panic attack,” he said calmly. “Has this happened before?”

Unable to speak, still gasping for breath Victoria managed a short nod. “Alright, then,” Liam continued in his same deep, measured voice. “Then you know you will come through this. I am here and nothing can get to you. Nobody will come in until I say so. It’s just us, do you understand me? Just us.”

Victoria nodded again, trying to avoid the image of Jimmy who was still lurking behind Liam. She pulled her gaze to focus on Liams steady blue eyes. “Good, look at me. Whatever set this off cannot get to you. Now, you need to try to breathe steadily, can you do that? Follow my breathing, in… out… in… out…” Victoria tried, but it was hard to force herself to obey. Her arm was still held aloft by Liam, her other was still at her throat. Liam gently took that hand and pressed her palm to his chest. “Feel my heartbeat, my love.” He leaned forward and touched his forehead to hers, so they were connected in three places; at her wrist where her blood was slowing, his heart which was thumping evenly against her hand and their foreheads, his skin a cool balm to the sweat that had broken out on hers. “I’m not going anywhere. It’s just us here.” He never let up his repeated mantra, words softly murmured to her panicked mind.

After a while, slowly, miraculously, her body started to react to his gentle handling of her. Her heart rate calmed, her pulse regulated, her breathing evened out.

“I’m going to take a look at your hand now, OK?” Victoria made a noise of assent and Liam brought her hand beneath their faces, turning it upwards so that he could remove the makeshift gauze to assess the damage. He released her hand on his chest and she dropped it to her lap. Liam took the pocket square off. “Well, the bleeding has stopped, which is the main thing. I think you pulled a stitch loose, but the wound seems to be holding. I’d prefer to get you to the professionals though…” He glanced up at her face, which had gone rigid again. “Maybe you’ll be OK without though as the wound hasn’t fully reopened.” He sighed slightly and cocked his head. “Probably best to keep an eye on it overnight though. Will you call me if this happens again?”

“But…” Victoria's head was fuzzy and sluggish as she came down off a sudden overload of adrenaline. “I thought we weren’t to call?”

“I think we can make an exception,” Liam said wryly. “I understand your concern regarding my father, but I think we can relax a little regarding the covertness of our communication. Still, it is best to keep it to a minimum, though please promise to call if you start to bleed again.”

At the mention of his father, Victoria looked up and realised the air was clear of Jimmys malevolence. Liam had chased him away and hadn’t even known that he was defending her from her demons. “I will.” She promised.

Liam looked up from his kneeling position, not once complaining though Victoria knew his knees had to be aching by now, and lifted a hand to stroke her face. “Good. I refuse to let anything happen to you again. And we are going to confront my father as soon as we can.”

“We?”

“Yes, you and I together,” Liam said, his eyes smouldering suddenly with righteous zeal. “He’s gone far enough and now that you’ve tracked him down we are putting a stop to this. And he is going to explain why he did it.” Liam took both of her hands in his and pulled her to her feet. His eyes burned into hers.

Liam took both of her hands in his and pulled her to her feet. His eyes burned into hers. “I swear to you now Victoria Quinn that I will stand by you and not let you face him alone. You and I are together in this matter. And…” he took a breath and steadied himself. “If you still want to marry me after we’ve confronted him and resolved the issue with Tariq, then I would love nothing more than to become your husband.” Victoria felt her face constrict at the thought, the terror of everything they still had to do before that could happen and everything that could go wrong. Liam nodded. “I don’t want you to say anything now. There’s no pressure, I’m just making you aware of my intentions. I am deeply in love with you, Victoria and will wait for your answer when you are ready. I understand…if you have some decisions to make about what you want. Or who.” He added finally, his eyes hooded as he spoke.

Victoria just nodded. She knew what he meant, despite her having tried to impress upon him that she didn’t feel that way about Drake. Could she still marry Liam after everything that had happened? Did the people of Cordonia even want her or would they riot to have her as their queen? It was too big for her to comprehend at that moment.

She sank her tired head onto his chest instead and he once again, as she felt he would always do, tucked her into his arms. This was the place she felt most safe even with questions and threats and concerns floating all around them. Inside his arms, she felt fortified, secluded from the rest of the world. She felt home. Was that love? She had professed her love for him with ease, but maybe she was just tired of feeling so afraid all the time. “I’d like to go back to the train soon. I’m so tired.” She said quietly. Liam kissed her head.

“Of course. We’ve missed the whole first act, but you can slip out at intermission if you like.” Liam suggested.

“I think that would be best.” She admitted. Her eyes were heavy and she was ready for her bed.

Liam, true to his word, arranged for a car to take her back to the train just before the lights went up after Act One and within no time she was passed out on her bunk, a strange mixture of Liam on her skin and Drake in her bed swirling around her as she slept.

Liam did not watch the rest of the show. He had someone to see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title song is another one that I listened to growing up, like the Cranberries before. It's Meat Loaf, Two Outta Three Ain't Bad. This is a real delve into my childhood. 
> 
> First of all sorry for the update taking a million years. Really sorry. 
> 
> A few more things:  
> So Victoria has a panic attack. It's hard to write mental health accurately even when you experience these things yourself, but I tried to write as honestly as possible, without going too far. I hope I portrayed it accurately. 
> 
> Drakes L-Bomb was something I considered waiting on. Making it a last-minute thing for the fic, but I wanted Victoria to get a real insight into Drakes reasons for not telling her everything and why he tried so hard to keep a distance. 
> 
> Liams reaction probably feels a bit flat, but something I've always felt from the game is that when Liam loves he loves hard and forever. He really thinks the sun rises and falls with the MC so that was what informed my writing for him in this chapter. That doesn't mean he's OK.


	15. Come What May

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drake and Liam have a heart to heart and it's off on the British leg of the tour.

_Tell me your fights are the same as mine_

Drake lined up the shot and sent the cue ball cracking against the black, sinking this final ball into the right corner pocket with ease. He took a swig of his beer and set the bottle down again, grabbing the triangular rack to set up a new game. Playing by himself was peaceful enough if a little boring. He could have used a challenger. He would have liked to have asked Quinn to come, but she was dead on her feet when she got back to the train, earlier than expected, with a makeshift wrap around her wrist and a tear-stained face. He was getting pretty tired of seeing her like this, angry at the world of the nobility that kept crushing her. He had meant what he said, that he’d run back to America with her. He could give her a good life over there, move to his moms' ranch and they could really live. He didn’t even care if she didn’t love him. He’d love her hard enough for the both of them.

He removed the rack and set up the cue ball to break hard, scattering the balls in all directions.

A knock at the door made him look up puzzled. “Yeah?”

The door opened as he was lining up the next shot. Concentrating on the ball near the centre pocket and trying to avoid all other balls nearby to make it a little trickier for himself, Drake didn’t see the figure enter the room, but when his name was spoken Drake jerked and missed his shot, sending the cue ball bouncing off the table. He sighed and looked up, a cool facade to hide a racing heart. “Hey, Liam.”

Liam bent to retrieve the ball and considered it. “That’s a foul.” He remarked, reaching for the stored pool cues and selecting one. “Which makes this my ball. What are you?”

Drake took a moment to chalk the tip of his cue, taking Liam's meaning regarding the two types of balls. “Nothing yet. It’s all up for grabs.”

Liam slipped off his blazer; Drake spotted the absence of a pocket square and remembered the oddly coloured and silky bandage on Victoria's arm. “You saw Quinn tonight, huh?” He remarked as Liam decided where to place the cue ball. “She looked pretty upset when she got back to the train.”

“Yes, well,” Liam said setting it down to aim for a striped green ball. “She has a lot going on as you know. She told me you figured out that it was my father.” He took his shot and sank the ball neatly.

Drake's eyes softened. “Liam, I’m so sorry. First about Bastien, then your dad.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Liam said, angling his shot for the next striped ball. “I can’t believe my father would betray me like this. Betray Victoria. I thought he liked her. Mind you,” Liam’s ball clunked against the wall of the table and bounced back against a cluster of balls. “I thought I knew him well and clearly I had no idea what he was capable of.”

Drake moved to the table as Liam took one of the beers Drake had already collected to get through that evening. He took a sip of the dark beer and pulled a face. “This doesn’t pull its punches.”

Drake smirked. “Nothing but dark beer tonight.”

“ _Dunkel bier_?” Liam replied slipping easily into German and taking another swig. Drake took his shot and potted a ball of solid red. “Victoria also told me about the two of you,” Liam said after a moment.

Drake stilled, hovering over the table, eyeing up the next shot. Then he sighed and straightened up. “Liam, look…” he started, but truthfully, he had no idea what to say to Liam. It was one thing to declare in front of Quinn that he was going to fight for her, but with Liam, before him, his resolve shrivelled up. He didn’t want to fight with Liam. That seemed so far against the natural order of things. And yet… summoning Victoria's face, her naked body beneath him, her soft sighs of ecstasy made it easier to stand firm against him. “I’ve never begrudged you anything.” He said eventually. “Everything you’ve ever had, the life you lead, the way everything revolves around you. Even me.” Drake swallowed down the resentment as best he could. “I’ve seen the cost of everything you have. But, Quinn… there’s a chance, a tiny chance admittedly, that she might actually want to be with me and I can’t let that chance slip away.”

Liam was standing with his pool cue pointed upright, considering every word out of Drake's mouth. “If she were to choose you,” he said slowly. “I would respect her choice. However, she seemed to be under the impression that you felt a lot more strongly for her than she for you.”

Drake felt a hot burst of anger in his chest and he looked down. “Did she tell you _I_ pursued _her_?” he asked indignantly. “Because that’s not true. I tried to keep a check on how I was feeling, I told her that it didn’t matter how I felt nothing would ever come of it. I let her go to you knowing you would give her everything I couldn’t, but then she ended up getting her heart stomped on anyway.” Drake slammed the end of the pool cue to the ground to emphasise his point. “I let her go once before, but I’m not giving up without a fight this time.”

Liam’s face was slowly transforming with shock as he understood. “Wait, when was this?”

“The ball,” Drake explained, realising that was inadequate in their world of a thousand dances every year. “The Coronation Ball.”

Liam leaned back to perch on a stool. “I didn’t realise it went that far back.”

Drake frowned, the fight draining from him at his friend's stricken face. “I thought you said she explained everything?”

“Just that the two of you had sex,” Liam said quietly. “Drake, how long have you felt this way?”

Drake shrugged, but he knew. “I mean, I guess I found her attractive from the start, but I didn’t _like_ her at first. I guess she got to me around the time that we went to Olivia's home.” Drake hesitated, but grabbed his beer and went to sit on the stool beside Liam, handing him his bottle. “We hung out a lot. You were spending most of your time with Olivia and Quinn needed a friend. I guess she started to wear my walls down then. I thought…” he let out a snort of wry laughter. “I thought she maybe loosened a brick or two, but even though I kept my eye on her, she was setting dynamite in the foundations. It wasn’t until what happened at Applewood Manor that I realised I was defenceless against her. It’s not just that she’s pretty, she’s… a force of nature. She might get beaten down by everything that’s been happening, but even if she’s knocked over she gets right back up again. She’s a fighter. I respect that. And I’m sorry, but for me, last night was a night I’ll never forget.”

Liam listened sombrely. His voice was very quiet when he spoke. “I’ve never heard you talk like this about anyone. You love her.”

Drake couldn’t speak at first. When Liam had come in Drake had been ready for a fight that he was hopelessly outmatched in. Victoria loved Liam and Liam loved Victoria. As far as fighting for a girl went, he was starting a hell of a long way behind his friend and he knew that. Knew he was the underdog in this fight and Liam had come into the room as calm and collected as the heavyweight champion entering the ring to rapturous applause. Now as Drake watched Liam shrank in on himself and suddenly Drake wanted to take everything back if it would stop his friend from hurting. The love he felt for Victoria battled with his love for Liam.

“There’s no-one quite like Quinn,” Drake replied finally.

Liam turned and chuckled without humour. “No, there isn’t” And he took a long gulp of beer. Drake followed suit.

“I don’t want to fight you, Liam,” Drake said after a short pause. “You’re like my brother. I don’t want to do anything that puts us against one another.”

“Nor I you, Drake,” Liam said softly. “I’ve made it clear to Victoria that if we can put all this behind us then I want to propose to her.” Drake felt a chill blast through him. So there was some fight left in Liam after all. He felt his hackles rise. “I don’t know what she wants. I might have ruined everything with her and she might want to stick to her current plan of returning to the United States. Never to look upon my face again. And I wouldn’t blame her.”

“I don’t think so,” Drake said thickly. “I know deep down that she loves you. I just can’t help but hope that she might just pick me instead. I can’t not try. I love you like a brother, Liam, but I love her, too.”

Liam nodded. “I know. I understand.” He clapped Drake on the shoulder as he rose to his feet. “I think it’s your shot still, Drake.”

Surprised, Drake got to his feet and played a poor shot, sinking the cue ball into a corner pocket. “Damn. You threw me off.”

“Sorry Drake.” Liam grinned. “All’s fair.”

Drake laughed quietly as he watched Liam place the white ball and make two shots in quick succession before finally missing one pocket. “Whatever happens,” he said as he sent the cue ball rolling towards his next shot. “Promise me we won’t lose each other. I couldn’t bear that.”

Liam met his gaze across the table. The kingly mask was in place, but Liam was still there behind his eyes.

“Agreed.” Liams voice was soft. “Whatever happens.” They shared a brief look of camaraderie into before Liam took aim.

Drake grabbed for the chalk again and sighed. “Man, of all the dive bars in New York…”

“…we had to walk into hers.” Liam finished.

*

The train was swapped for a plane and it took Victoria and her friends over to London, a place she had always thought would be interesting to visit under less trying circumstances. The plane trip only took two hours and the jet lag was minimal with the UK being only an hour behind Germany, but even so, Victoria felt thoroughly shaken up by the tour. At least she was in a country where she understood the language. Although there was a definite urge to head out to explore the city, drink beer in a pub and buy some tacky souvenir of something with the Union Jack emblazoned on it, Victoria remained in her hotel room marvelling at how big the small space felt when compared to the train carriage. The fact that it wasn’t moving constantly also took some getting used to.

Madeleine kept a very tight schedule, and Victoria knew they were having a meal that evening along with a selection of royals that Victoria actually knew the names of. She couldn’t deny that there was a definite appeal to meeting a prince who’d married an American commoner, or there would if the thought of confronting Constantine wasn’t weighing down on her.

Hana and Maxwell, as usual, helped her to prepare for the dinner, knowing full well the true aim of the night. Victoria dressed in a simple mauve wrap dress with three quarter length sleeves and which came to a respectable hemline at her knees. She tied her hair back to a low ponytail, not interested in fancying herself up too much for this meeting. Liam had said he would help, but she hadn’t heard any concrete plans from him and truthfully, she was afraid to ask if he meant it. If for whatever reason he couldn’t or wouldn’t be there with her when she spoke to his father, she would just figure out how to deal with that at the time.

*

The meal was hosted at a fancy house rather than a restaurant and was closed to the press. Victoria was very glad about that. She didn’t need an audience tonight.

On her way in with her friends, Liam appeared without his fiancée to pull Victoria aside. “Victoria, you look wonderful,” he said. His face was drawn, but his eyes couldn't help but light up as he took her in and on the pretence of politeness he leaned in to kiss her softly on the cheek. His aftershave swam around her. As he brushed his mouth over her skin, he murmured quietly. “Father is here. I’ll signal you when the dinner is winding down. I’ll draw him away and we can speak to him.”

Victoria nodded as he drew back. Liam smiled, though his eyes were determined.

“One way or another this will be over tonight.”

“You can be confident for both of us,” Victoria said with an uneasy smile. Liam's eyes darted aside, then he reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze before dropping it quickly.

“I promise you it will all be alright.”

Victoria just nodded and a server approached to lead her to her seat. She found herself at a table with her friends, which had to be Liams doing and she appreciated it. Her chair was pulled out by the server and as she slid onto the cushioned seat she heard the voice of the King Father, leading his wife to their table with Liam and Madeleine. Victoria swallowed as she turned her neck to look over at him.

Drake was seated beside her, heating up her entire right side just by his presence alone. Being faced with the reality that she couldn't compartmentalize the two men forever -- they were best friends after all and wouldn't be far from each other no matter how much she messed them up -- was like swallowing something large and hot, which sat in her belly and curdled unpleasantly. 

“Quinn?” Drake said from his place at her side. “You ok? You’ve gone very pale.”

Before Victoria could reply, the chair on her right was moved and Olivia sat down beside her.

“I should’ve guessed Madeleine would seat me with you lot,” she muttered darkly. Victoria spun around to take in the sight of the Duchess with a smile.

“Olivia,” Victoria said warmly, pleased to see her and pleased by the distraction. “I believe this seating arrangement comes from the King himself. That’s why I’m sat amongst friends.”

“Amongst friends plus one Nevrakis.” Olivia corrected, but Victoria shook her head.

“Nope. My friends.” She gave Olivia a pointed look until the redhead tutted and looked away.

“I’m going to need a lot of wine if you’re going to be so annoying, Victoria.” But her cheeks betrayed a small spot of pink. Victoria could see she was pleased to be included.

Looking around their small table Victoria noted an empty chair between Hana and Olivia. She glanced around the faces. “Where’s Bertrand?”

Hana looked equally surprised. “It’s not like him to miss an important dinner.”

Maxwell fiddled with his salad fork. “He decided to go back to Paris. He wasn’t at the opera either, though I’m not sure any of you noticed.” He grinned softly. “Yeah, he thought he ought to go to Paris.”

“He’s gone to see Savannah,” Victoria filled in. “And Bartie.”

“That makes sense.” Hana nodded. “I’m proud of him; I can’t imagine how daunting a prospect that must be.”

“What if Savannah doesn’t want to see him?” Olivia asked, her brow arching.

“I, er… I called her to warn her,” Drake said, looking down at the table cloth. “I guess I owed her that…”

“…after telling Bertrand in the first place?” Victoria finished, with no condemnation in her voice. Drake glanced up at her.

“Yeah, pretty much,” he admitted ruefully. “She wasn’t mad. She just… got quiet for a while. And then she said she should have told Bertrand a long time ago, so in a way she was glad I’d done it.”

“It was her business whether she chose to tell Bertrand,” Victoria said carefully. “But I can imagine that as time went on it got harder to know how to start that conversation. I'm sure there is some relief knowing it's all out in the open now.”

“I just hope I haven’t made things worse.”

“I bet it’ll all work out just fine!” Maxwell put in with a cheery grin as the servers begin bringing out the starters. Drake's eyes flashed angrily.

“Sure, because you’re such a great judge of—”

“Drake,” Victoria said quickly, cutting him off as their table received the first plates. They sat quietly and received their goats' cheese and caramelised onion tarts with a delicate salad on the side. They started to tuck in and slowly talk resumed around the table, helped along greatly by Hanas adept skill at setting everyone at ease. She had confided in Victoria once that part of her training was in small talk, knowing instinctively which topics to avoid and what would be the more neutral way to converse over a meal. Although her training had been to find a suitable husband, Victoria felt she had come to rely on Hanas talents a great deal. She wondered how Hanas parents would react to knowing how their time, money and efforts were being spent.

The food was delicious, but Victoria barely tasted it. She kept stealing glances at the top table where Constantine sat, seemingly oblivious to her looks. Drake noticed and, as she took a look that brought the count of how many times she’d done it into double figures, he put down his knife and put his hand over hers. Victoria dragged her eyes from the King Father to the warm brown eyes of Drake. “Hey, it’s OK.” He said softly. “He’s not going anywhere anytime soon.”

Victoria nodded and pulled her hand back, grabbing her glass and taking a sip. She was too jumpy to trust herself with the wine so stuck to the table water again, which probably cost as much as she would ever have spent on wine before coming to Europe.

Olivia, on the other hand, was enjoying the deep red wine on offer and as she took a drink she observed Victoria. “You intend to confront him tonight?”

Victoria nodded, glad for the discretion of her friends. “I can’t let him out of my sight tonight.”

“Well, as much as it pains me to admit this, but Drake is right,” Olivia said with a sigh. “He’s not going anywhere just yet. That would be rude.”

Victoria nodded again. “I know. Liam said to wait until the meal was winding down. I just… I want to get it over and done with.”

“The soup course is next,” Hana said sympathetically. “After that, there are a few more courses to go, but I’m sure you’ll get your chance soon.”

“For both of us,” Olivia said with eyes like flint. “I can’t exactly face him, I know, but do mention me would you?”

“Of course, Olivia,” Victoria said. “We’ve both been wronged. We should both get apologies.”

The dishes were swapped around and the watercress soup came out. Victoria did her best to focus on the food, though she could feel Constantine's presence behind her that it was difficult. Maxwell filled up her water glass after she took to sipping it whenever she felt like looking to the King Father.

“We won’t let him slip out unnoticed,” he promised. “You know what they say: five pairs of eyes are better than one.”

“Who says that?” Drake asked.

“Me, I just said it.” Maxwell grinned. “And that’s all it takes to start a new saying.”

“That and other people have to adopt the saying, too.” Hana pointed out. Maxwell nodded.

“And you all will, won’t you?”

Olivia snorted and Drake rolled his eyes. Victoria smiled. “Sure Maxwell. We’ll start saying it.”

“Speak for yourself,” Drake muttered.

Victoria was grateful indeed to be sitting amongst her friends and she chuckled. Drake grinned as he caught her eye, then leaned closer while the other three were chatting. “You look beautiful tonight.”

A flippy feeling in her stomach caused the laughter to flee from her. Victoria tried a smile instead, which felt crooked on her mouth. “Thank you.” She muttered back.

“I talked to Liam.” Drake went on. “I know you were worried about us, but it’s OK. It’ll all be OK, whatever happens.” Victoria met his eyes, which were deep and soft and kind. She didn’t think she’d ever seen him look at her like that. Intense, amused, longing, angry, pitying. Those she knew. This tender look was something strange and new. She just nodded.

“Drake…” She started but he shook his head.

“No, don’t say anything yet,” Drake said. “We can talk later. I know you’re busy today.”

Victoria watched him resume eating and she matched his movements mechanically, not tasting the soup as she swallowed it.

The main course was roast chicken leg served on a bed of potato gratin with truffles and seasonal vegetables on the side. This was the first morsel to satisfy her and make her stop worrying for a few moments as the flavours mingled on her tongue pleasantly.

*

Every footstep felt heavy as Victoria made her way across the room and into the hallway. Knowing that just outside was the man who had caused her such distress and harm over the past few months was a terrifying prospect. She was torn, wanting to confront the man with her angry words or even her fists, but this was not only Liam’s father, a man he looked up to above all else, but also the King Father and Bastien was still looking for a reason to send her packing back home. She had to tread carefully. The biggest worry was that Liam might take his dad’s side in this. If Liam listening to whatever the reasons were for Constantine doing what he did and reflected that there was sense in them, Victoria feared she might just lose it.

She refused to falter in her movement though and walked out into the empty corridor and down the hall without breaking her stride. Liam caught her eye as she approached and she saw a glimmer of love in those blue eyes.

Constantine was just asking what was so important that Liam had to speak with him so urgently when Victoria came up behind and Liam nodded to her.

“The matter, father, is this,” Liam said, holding out his arm. Victoria walked around the erstwhile King to stand beside the reigning monarch.

Constantine's face didn’t even twitch as he took in her appearance at his sons' side. “Hello, Lady Victoria. What a pleasure to see you again.”

Victoria stood beside Liam, feeling very short despite her heels. Liam seemed to take after his father in height and both men were a good head higher than she. “Your Majesty,” she said as steadily as she could. “I’m here to give you a chance to explain to Liam and me why you decided you needed to interfere with your sons choice of bride.” Victoria felt each word buoy her and she lifted her chin. “And perhaps give you a chance to apologise.”

Constantine surveyed her coolly. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Liam sighed. “Father, please just be straight with Victoria. And me.”

Constantine's steely eyes flickered to Liam. “Really now, Liam, I’m surprised at you.” He held up his hand to his mouth as a small coughing fit overcame his speech for a moment, but his grey eyes remained impassive.

“Father, we know what’s been going on.” Liam pressed. “What we can’t fathom is why.”

Constantine coughed again as he looked back at Victoria. “What nonsense ideas have you been filling his head with?” He asked angrily, coughing again at the end of his speech. He reached for a headkerchief as the coughing overtook him.

“Why did you—” Victoria started, but she was struck dumb by the severity of the fit. “Your Majesty?”

Constantine pitched forward choking into his handkerchief. Liam glanced at Victoria with concern and then stepped to touched his fathers back. “Father?”

Constantine's knees bowed and he started to fall back against the wall. Liam reacted at once, grabbing his arm to catch him. “Father!”

Victoria snapped her head to Liam. “I’ll fetch help.” She decided, turning to head back down the corridor, but before she could move two steps Regina appeared, flanked by her Queens Guard. “Queen Mother,” Victoria said. “It’s—”

“Let me pass,” she said in a clipped voice and Victoria moved aside at once. Regina headed for Constantine, assessing him within seconds and snapping at the guards: “get him to a hospital at once.” Satisfied that the guards had her husband she whirled back on Victoria. “You are not to breathe a word of this to Anyone, do you understand me?”

“I…” Victoria managed as she nodded, eyes wide with shock.

Liam brushed past his stepmother and took Victoria’s arm. “She’s coming with us,” he announced. Regina looked for a moment like she wanted to argue, but then heard her husbands hacking cough heading away from them, so closed her mouth and turned to follow him.

Liam glanced at Victoria. “There’s a lot to explain, but please come along. I’d like you with me.” Victoria nodded wordlessly and slipped her hand into his. His eyes were creased with worry for his father and Victoria knew right then that if she could allay his fears in any way great or small with her presence then she would do it. She let him tug her along and together they flew down the hallway after the King Father, Queen Mother and the guards that were supporting Constantine. They spilled into a waiting car and headed off to the hospital.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for the chapter is by The Last Bison. 
> 
> This was a hard chapter. Having Liam and Drake butt heads felt really hard so I was in some part pushing them to argue and in other parts pulling them back. They are brothers and they love each other, but they also have this conflict now. And there isn't really anything to base it on in-game, because Liam is oblivious to the MC and anyone else until he proposes and then he's like "OK, cool, have all my blessings." and Drake isn't far different. So here's my attempt!


	16. Breathe (2AM)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria and Liam confront Constantine.

_These mistakes you’ve made, you’ll just make them again  
If you only try turning around._

Waiting at the hospital was the strangest experience. Victoria didn’t want to sit still so she tried to make herself useful by offering to find drinks, but the Queen's guard refused to let her leave. Liam was a statue, sitting with his elbows on his knees, his chin in his hands. Regina was sitting just as still with a seemingly calm face that belied her worry unless you stopped to take in the tension around her eyes. Victoria hovered, unable to leave, not feeling part of the family. She wished then that Liam had not insisted on bringing her. She watched Liam as he eventually started to move; absentmindedly playing with the ring on his finger. It was an act not committed by a man who was thinking about what he was doing, but even so, the sight of him fiddling with the symbol of his engagement was like a dagger to Victoria's heart. She remained silent and merely looked away, unwilling to bring it up while he was in distress. Finally, she did speak. “Shall I contact Madeleine?” She said in a quiet voice.

Liam looked up, his gaze far away, slowly coming into focus, before he suddenly snapped back into the room. He sprang to his feet. “No. No, she doesn’t know.”

Victoria nodded, though it only raised more questions. She didn’t really understand what was going on either, baring the fact that there was something clearly very wrong with the King Father and it felt bizarre to think that Liam's fiancee had no idea. The worry in the room was palpable, but there was not urgent panic; this felt like a familiar worry. If anything, that concerned her the most. Victoria's arms were wrapped around herself, her stitched wrist ugly and visible to anyone who cared to look. She pushed it from her mind. Nobody was looking. They were busy with other things.

Liam glanced at her, and even under the eye of his stepmother, he reached for her, laying his palm over her arm. Victoria's eyes flickered to Regina, who looked like she was somewhere very deep inside her own thoughts. Regardless of that, Victoria stepped out of his reach. “Don’t,” she said in a low voice. “we’re in public.”

Liam swallowed, hurt washing over his face at this rejection. “Hardly.” He replied just as quietly.

Victoria took in his sorrowful eyes and the concerned folds of his brow and sighed. Public or not, he was hurting. She took a step closer again and slipped an arm around his. “Sorry.” She muttered.

Liam let her rub her hand soothingly up his arm and smiled wanly. “Never be.”

After a while, a doctor came into the room and Regina stood to go to him. Victoria released Liam so he could go and speak with him, too, hanging back knowing this wasn’t her place. Liam had insisted she come along to receive an explanation beyond what she believed she had pieced together and she wasn’t family, so she was content to wait while they spoke to the doctor. Her fingers laced together until her knuckles went while. Liam was nodding to the man. Victoria turned her gaze on Regina whose face was openly distraught. Her instinct was to cross over the room to go to the woman who had raised Liam after his mothers' death and who she both liked and respected, but of course, that was impossible. She stood awkwardly unable to be of any assistance to Regina in her grief. That felt rotten.

Liam took a deep breath and turned to wave Victoria over. Her brows quirked in confusion, but she headed over, her heels announcing her approach with resounding clacks on the floor. “My father is stable for now.” Liam explained. “We can see him now.”

Victoria’s frown deepened and she glanced between the two royals before her. “Us? But what about…?”

“Liam, I really must protest—” Regina added as Victoria tailed off, but Liam's face was stern.

“Victoria and I must speak with my father while we still…” he swallowed, “while we still have the chance to.”

“Liam, this doesn’t seem right,” Victoria said, stepping back again. “It’s not important—”

Liam turned around to grasp her arms and as she met his intense gaze, Victoria realised she wasn’t seeing the King of Cordonia right then, but rather a small, frightened boy. “It _is_ important, Victoria. You know that. Believe me, I want nothing more than to sit beside my fathers' bed and hold his hand and let him heal, but we have to know why he did what he did to us.”

Regina took in the scene, her eyes astute. “I don’t know to what you are referring, Liam, but I agree with Victoria that whatever this is can wait.”

Liam shook his head, not looking at his stepmother. His words came fast and hard as if he could outrun the feelings as they swelled within him. “Victoria, my father is dying. Apparently much quicker than we thought. Meanwhile, my wedding is coming up fast. If we want answers, we need to get them now.”

Victoria’s mouth fell open and her eyes started to fill with their own accord. Liam looked so broken down at that moment that she couldn’t bear it. She slid her arms free of his grip and wrapped them around his neck, gripping him close. “Oh, Liam.” She breathed. She felt dampness on her neck and shut her eyes, her own tear trickling over her chin. “I’m so sorry.”

“If you will excuse me.” Regina broke in curtly and Victoria sensed her leave the room, the Queen's guard following her. She remained with Liam, locked in their embrace, having broken the dam within him, holding him while he cried. His shaking back and the hot tears on her neck were the only signs that he was in distress; he remained silent the whole time, which felt all the more heart-breaking to Victoria. She didn’t offer any platitudes, nor shushed him. She merely held onto him and let him be.

Everything was wrong. That Liam was losing his father too soon was bad enough, but that they had determined that he was the man spearheading their separation so that Victoria could not even be there for Liam was worse. Madeleine being unaware of the situation was just as bad, leaving no-one to look after Liam as he processed the life-altering situation he was going through.

When Liam eventually pulled back, his eyes were red and he swiped his knuckles across his eyes, ridding himself of his tears. “I’m sorry, I just… that’s the first time I’ve spoken those words aloud to anyone.”

“You didn’t tell Drake?” Victoria asked softly. “Bastien? Anyone?” Liam shook his head. “Liam, you should have at least told Drake. He wouldn’t want you to suffer in silence, he’d want to be there for you.”

“To tell you the truth, I didn’t much want to say them to anyone.” Liam said, wiping his eyes with a shaking finger. “If I didn’t say it, perhaps it might not be happening. Stupid, I know.”

Victoria took his face in her hands. “Liam…” words failed so she put her mouth to better use, touching her lips to his in a tender kiss. Liam returned it with gratitude. “Liam, sweetheart, you might be the King of a nation, but you don’t have to do this alone.”

“Yes, I do.” Liam said with a sniff. “My father saw to that when he schemed to put Madeleine on my arm instead of you.” His eyes were dark and sombre. “Dying or not, I don’t know how I will ever forgive him for that.”

It all felt so uneasy and complicated to Victoria. She didn’t want to be a reason for Liam and his father to have bad blood; what if Constantine died with this wedge between them unresolved? She couldn’t have that. Victoria took Liam's hand in hers. “Come on, let’s go and speak to him.”

Liam nodded, and together they followed the hallway to the King Fathers hospital room.

*

Liam lead the way to the room. It was much like any private hospital room, Victoria decided. It didn’t really seem to matter what continent they were on or what country they were in, a hospital room was a hospital room. Beeping machines, sterile walls, a sick person in a bed. Constantine turned his head with a grateful smile as Liam pushed the door open. “Liam, my boy…”

Regina was sitting beside his bed and her eyes narrowed as she caught sight of Victoria before the King Father did.

“Father,” Liam said, going to stand beside him. Victoria stepped in behind him, feeling uneasy about her presence. Constantine finally saw her and looked back at his son, aghast.

“What is the meaning of this?” He asked in a tired voice. “Lady Victoria has no business being here.”

“Yes, she does,” Liam said in a tone of low determination. As he sensed Victoria's reticence, he turned and held out his hand. Not knowing what else to do Victoria stepped up beside him and took it. He was warm and solid and helped her to find her feet in this cold room.

“Your Majesty, I’m very sorry to hear that you are so unwell.” Victoria said, surprising herself as the words came out steady and strong. “Liam has filled me in and I cannot imagine what you are going through. All of you.” She added, looking to Regina.

“Yes well,” Constantine said with a sigh. “These are the hands we have been dealt. It’s an extremely aggressive form of lung cancer. There is nothing to be done.”

“I take it this is why you stepped down from your duties during the season?” Victoria asked, the pieces clicking into place all at once. “Liam was so distant after you spoke on the beach after the Regatta. There was obviously something weighing on him. Suddenly the choice of his future queen seemed all the more important.” Liam nodded as he looked down at her.

“That’s right.” Liam said, taking up the question. “That was when my father told me of his ill health. It was a lot to take in, but even as I kept the truth from you, Victoria, you were there for me. I will ever be grateful for that.” He smiled.

Constantine coughed on the bed and all eyes snapped to him. “Oh, don’t.” he said crossly, accepting a glass of water from Regina. “I will not have everyone handling me with kid gloves while I still draw breath. Difficult though it at times may be.”

Victoria nodded, shoving her sympathies aside as best she could. She was there for a reason. “That’s good to hear, that you still have your spirit. Because I’m afraid I’m not here for a social call.”

Constantine's eyes narrowed over his glass. She met his gaze with her own steely eyes. “Your Majesty, Liam and I know what you did to me. You framed me, using Lady Penelope and Bastien to engineer a situation in my room that you could use to push me out of the running for Liam's hand.” Her mouth started to dry up and she cleared her throat. Her voice came out less sure now. “You… you are the reason Tariq was in my room that night. You are why he thought I was in his room, why he thought he would be welcome to kiss me and—” She broke off, looking away and dropping Liam's hand. It was humiliating to talk about, reliving those dreadful moments. That look on his face, his dry lips on hers, his hand roaming her body. She shuddered, suddenly cold. “What happened to me was sexual assault and you made it happen. And what’s worse is that you had a photographer planted outside my room waiting to document it to use against me.” Victoria turned to the King Father, catching sight of Regina as she moved. The woman was openly gaping, shock writ across her face. So, this was news to her after all.

Constantine was another story. His face was an inscrutable mask, which told Victoria everything she needed to know. “Do you know what it’s like to feel trapped in your own body? To question yourself afterwards; why didn’t I say something sooner? Before he kissed me? Why didn’t I scream? To question how much of it was my fault because of course, it _had_ to be my fault. I had to be asking for it in some way. And then to read every single moment of my self-doubt written a hundred different ways in the papers afterwards, with my body on display to anyone who wants to see it? My scars, of which I am so ashamed, which I don’t show to anyone, not if I can help it.” Victoria swallowed, looking down again. “Do you know that it’s happened since then? How many noblemen have placed their hands on me, because Tariq got away with it?” Liam made a noise beside her, a primal angry growl in his chest, his eyes hard chips of ice. His fists were clenched at his sides, but Victoria was not yet finished.

What had seemed impossible to begin talking about now felt impossible to stop. The levee had broken inside her and as her words poured out she commanded the attention of everyone in that room, the commoner captivating the eyes and ears of royalty. “I had my drink spiked; was that you? Another attempt to run me out of the country, to further slander my name?” His brow gave a twitch, that neither confirmed nor denied the accusation, but she pressed on unwilling or unable to pause. “Do you know what it feels like to be afraid all the time? That was my life before I came here. I grew up in a toxic household until I ran away when I was still a child. At sixteen I had to build a new life for myself and I did; it was small and lonely, but that was what it took to keep me safe. Then I came here and found that with Liam I stopped dreading things, stopped being anxious about the unknown. Started relaxing. Starting living. And because of you, that feeling came back, ripping me away from Liam in the process.” Victoria leaned against the railing of Constantine's bed. Nobody else moved. “Why? Why did you do this to me?”

Constantine took another drink of his water and handed the glass to his wife, shifting himself up in the bed to sit taller. His gaze never flickered from her face, his cool grey eyes keeping her locked in his sights. His mouth was a thin line. “Yes, I do know how it feels to live in fear, Victoria. I fear for the lives of my wife and children and for the safety of my people. Cordonia has many enemies for a small nation and I live under their threat constantly. Yes, I know how it feels.” He cleared his throat with another cough and shut his eyes for a moment. He looked like a weary old man, for the first time since Victoria had met him. The grey hair seemed more pronounced, his weathered and wrinkled visage more worn. But his eyes were fierce and unapologetic when he opened them again. “Do you know about any of the assassination attempts over the years?”

Victoria nodded. “Liam told me about his mother. And Drake told me about the attack when he was at college.” She turned to look at Liam as she spoke, her eyes softened for him. He looked back sadly.

“Those are not the only attempts,” Constantine said. Regina bowed her head. “I loved Liam's mother. She was a commoner from Auvernal; did you know that?”

Victoria shook her head. “No, I didn’t.”

“Yes, well.” Constantine reached over and took his current wifes’ hand. “Leos mother was from a minor noble family and fled from her responsibilities after a short time in her position. Liam's mother was the daughter of a pair of teachers. She settled well into her role and brought up Leo as if he were her own.” Liam nodded sorrowfully at these words. “And then she was killed when the boys were young. She died alone in her room, a horrible death. Poison.” Constantine took in a shuddering breath. “After Eleanor's death, the country was plunged into disarray. I acted quickly and married Regina, and our wedding helped stabilise the country for the following seven years, until the next serious attempt. Both of my sons were in danger, as was my wife. I could do nothing to stop it from happening.” Constantine raised his eyes to Victorias, his face a mask of pain and fury. “Yes, I know how it feels to be afraid. My illness brought everything into perspective. I had to burden Liam with the crown much sooner than anticipated and I would not be able to be there to guide him. I knew I had to work quickly to secure the future of my country and to protect my son.”

Victoria’s shaking hands gripped the railing tightly. “So, you set me up? How did that help?”

Constantine glanced to Liam, with something akin to an apology in his eyes. “I knew how Liam felt about you. It was obvious to anyone paying attention, but he formally requested my blessing on your engagement after that night that the Beaumonts hosted. He was so proud of his choice, but I knew it would be the wrong one.” He looked back at Victoria, any regret having fled. “ _You_ would be the wrong choice. A charming, intelligent woman, yes, but not the queen of Cordonia. Not the queen that my country sorely needs, not the wife who would protect my boy. No, not compared to Madeleine.”

Regina looked up as Constantine spoke of her kin.

“I could have learned…” Victoria started, but she knew it was a weak argument. Her hands slipped from the railing.

“No, you couldn’t,” Constantine argued before she could finish. Now more than ever when he spoke it was as if Liam and Regina were not even in the room. “Not quickly or concisely enough. Inexperience can be seen as weakness and weakness, even in appearance… no, especially in appearance… is fatal. I’ve lost so much to our enemies, and on his coronation those enemies became Liams. When I am gone there will be no-one left to protect him. One wrong step and Liam could lose his kingdom or even his life. Madeleine was my only hope for keeping him and Cordonia safe. I made sure she would be the one chosen.”

Victoria took a few moments to respond. It was exactly as Madeleine had said. Everything they did, every single step was for the King of Cordonia. Personal hopes and desires were not even secondary to the concern, they were not even important.

And in her heart, Victoria agreed.

Liam's safety was of utmost importance, if only because Victoria knew that she would not want to live in a world where Liam was gone. Yes, his safety was paramount. “I assume you were behind Olivia's letters, too?”

“Yes.” Constantine nodded once. “I’m sure you can understand why.”

“One thing I still don’t understand…” Victoria said quietly. “is why go to so much trouble? Why cause me so much harm? If it all comes down to Liam's safety why not just explain that to me?” Victoria glanced at Liam who was very still and seemed very far away in the depths of his mind while his father and Victoria spoke. “If you’d just taken me aside and told me all that do you really think I would have put my happiness over Liam's safety? You say it was obvious how he felt, surely you know I feel the same things for him? Why have me attacked and humiliated and threatened? I would have left of my own accord had I known that doing so would have kept him safe.”

“It wasn’t personal, Lady Victoria.”

“I know,” Victoria said. “It was, even so, one of the shittiest things anyone has ever done to me and my father once beat me half to death and deliberately broke my ankle to stop me from running away. So, you’ve beaten a pretty high bar. Congratulations.”

Liam seemed to slowly come back to the present as she spoke, his eyes focusing on her words. “Victoria…?”

She stepped back from the bed, moving out of reach. “I understand now. I understand that I will never be vindicated. I’ll never get to restore my name to your country. It’s over.” Victoria looked to Constantine to Regina. “I hope you both enjoy the time you have left together.” And then she turned her heavy head towards Liam, her heart shattering in her chest, the final half-hearted beats giving out as the piecemeal organ finally, inexorably broke. “I’ll always love you, Liam. Be safe.”

Victoria turned away from the family she had hoped to join and walked to the door.

“Wait.” She kept walking. “Wait, stop, Victoria.” There were hands on her arms, gently but insistently pulling her around.

“Liam, don’t.” She said, tears returning to her eyes. “You heard what your father said, I have to go!”

Liam turned her to face him. “No, you don’t.”

“Liam, please,” Constantine raised his voice to cut through the noise. “I know that I’ve hurt you as well, but this is the price of the—”

“ _No_.”

The word rang out, silencing Constantine and stilling Victoria in Liam's grip. Liam released her and turned around to face his father, who took advantage of the quiet to try again. Constantine was now the one gripping that bed railing with one hand, his other still grasping his wife, whose eyes were wide as she observed the scene before her.

“Liam, I couldn’t afford to put your happiness, or Victoria’s, above our peoples future. You will have to make sacrifices of your own sooner or later. The weight of the crown is great and you will learn how to hurt one to save many. It is inevitable.”

Liam raised his head, squaring his shoulders. “No.” He said a second time.

His voice was more severe than Victoria had ever heard it. She heard the command in his tone ring out across the room. “You act as though you didn’t have a choice, but you did, father. You didn’t accidentally cause all of this misery. You made it happen by making a decision about what kind of king… what kind of _father_ … you wanted to be.” Liam took a few steady steps towards the bed. “Here is my choice. I love Victoria with all my heart. She makes me incredibly happy and all I have wanted to do since I met her is live out my days with her. If you hadn’t interfered I would have proposed to her the night of the Coronation Ball. You hurt the woman I love with cruelty I would never have dreamt you possessed. I have long admired you, father, looked up to you and remembered the lessons you’ve imparted on me as I strive to take on the mantle of king. I looked at you and marvelled at the legacy you leave me, wondered how I would ever match up to you. Well. The time is now. I am the king.” Liam turned back to Victoria who stood rooted to the floor. “And as the King of Cordonia, I am placing Victoria under my protection. I will keep her safe as long as I draw breath, whether she will have me or not. I will help right every wrong that has been done to her since coming to Cordonia.” Liam's face was so many things at that moment. Open and honest, melancholic and regretful, grim and determined. All this underscored the oath Liam was speaking to her, and she realised then that that was what this was. A pledge for her protection and his assistance, a pledge that demanded nothing from her in return. Victoria blinked and a tear fell. Liam spun to his fathers' bed again. “And I am _commanding_ you, Constantine Reginald Albert Rys as your monarch to help us in any way you can.”

Victoria scarcely dared breath. The authority reverberated around the walls of the hospital room. Regina was looking at Liam as if she had never seen him before. Constantine was combating the authority with his own glare, but as Victoria watched the man shrank into the pillows, reverting back to the old man in a hospital bed.

“Very well.” Constantine finally replied. “I can only hope my fears prove unfounded.” He stared up at the ceiling for a long while. “None of this can be public knowledge. My involvement must remain secret.”

“Yes,” Regina said, her voice croaky after having listened for so long without speaking. “Admitting Constantine's involvement would only shake the Cordonian peoples' faith in their rulers and would reflect badly on us all. But Lady Victoria has long been popular with the people, despite every effort to tarnish her reputation in the media. I believe that exonerating her to the public will be easy enough without the connection to your father.”

“I understand,” Liam said. “We need to find Tariq. He has not been seen at court since that night at Applewood. Where is he?”

“I… don’t know,” Constantine admitted. “I bade him leave after the… incident. But I promise that after tonight I will enlist the services of the King's Guard to track him down.” A knock on the door behind her made Victoria jump and she moved aside to let the doctor head into the room. “Liam, Victoria, goodnight,” Constantine said pointedly.

“Sleep well, father,” Liam said, taking Victoria's arm and guiding her to the door.

They didn’t speak as they walked outside. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for the chapter title is by Anna Nalick. 
> 
> Well, this was a chapter I had to amend after the Royal Heir came out! Suddenly Liams mum had a name and a nationality! I've kept the rest of the stuff I made up and if TRH makes a liar of me then so be it!


	17. The Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria opens up to Liam and plans are made.

_They don’t know what I’ve been through like you do  
_

“Liam, stop.” Victoria pulled her arm back. Her heart was racing, her mind whirling with everything that had just happened. “Wait, please.”

Liam rounded on her pent up with unspent energy, his face flushed, eyes scanning her face. “Are you… how are you?”

Victoria bent over, drawing in great gulps of breath, one hand supporting herself on the wall. To the casual observer they might have looked like two people who had just run a marathon, not merely had a discussion with an old man. “I don’t know. Everything’s changed. I don’t know how I feel.” She glanced up at Liam, leaning back against the wall on the opposite side of the empty corridor. “How are _you_?”

Liam was slowly shaking his head. “I can’t believe he admitted everything he did. Like he was justified by any of it. I’m so sorry, Victoria.”

“He _was_ justified,” Victoria said straightening up. “You heard him. His reasons were borne out of love and desperation.”

Liam's face turned incredulous. “You can’t be defending him? After what he did to you?”

“I’m not a fan, don’t get me wrong,” Victoria replied slowly. “I can’t imagine I shall ever forgive him for what he did to me. His methods were messed up, but his reasons were sound. Your life is more important than my happiness.”

Liam was now staring at her, with a look of utter consternation. “Your happiness is everything.”

“Spoken like a man in love,” Victoria murmured. “But he’s right. The king is too important—”

“No,” Liam crossed the hallway and took her in his arms. “No. Stop it.”

“The king is too important to risk it all on the love of someone who can’t protect him.” Victoria finished heedless of his words. She let him hold her, didn’t try to pull away, but her voice was sharp. “If I’m a risk, then I can’t be with you.”

“Victoria, if you don’t love me then say it,” Liam said shakily. She could feel each breath on her face as he spoke. They were so close. “If that’s the reason we can’t be together then fine. I’ll accept that. If you don’t want to be with me because of that reason then say it. But don’t make his reasons yours. Don’t leave me because of what he said.”

Victoria looked up with clear eyes. “I love you.” She said. “But people like us don’t get to make decisions based on love.”

“People like us…?”

“You don’t get to place love over your safety or the safety of your country,” Victoria explained, the words hammering in her skull in Constantine's voice. “And someone like me doesn’t deserve it.”

Liam's eyes searched hers, the blue darkening. “You deserve happiness.” He said eventually.

“Not with you.” And now she broke away, taking advantage of his shock to wriggle free. “I knew I didn’t belong here. With you. I should never have come.” She turned away from Liam, walking a few steps down the hallway, though she wasn’t leaving. She circled around, her feet leading her, her mind miles away. Victoria's hand was against her head, fingers disappearing into her hair. “And it’s probably for the best. I have such cruelty inside me and now I know you have, too.”

“What are you talking about?” Liam asked stock still, arms taut at his sides. Victoria leaned back against the nearest wall. She was suddenly so bone tired.

“Your fathers' methods were brutal.” She said. “What he did to me has already left scars. My father was savage in his own right. These things are in us, don’t you see? When you let me leave at the Coronation Ball, when you left me again after that night at Applewood, those were further wounds. Your father left a knife in me, but you twisted it.” Victoria stepped off from the wall and walked to Liam. His eyes were guarded. “My father did horrible things to me and to my mom. To his enemies. I did nothing about it for a long time until I had the opportunity to hurt him back. I went behind his back to his rivals, to his enemy Frank Kelly, and they helped me send him to prison. I handed over evidence to the cops and the district attorneys office. Because of me, he was behind bars where he belonged.”

“I know this,” Liam said quietly. “You did the right thing.”

“But you see, he thought it was my mom who betrayed him.” Victoria went on as if he’d not spoken. “He thought she had him sent away. He got more and more paranoid as he got older, thought she was always cheating on him and plotting against her, so it was easy for him to decide she was the culprit.” Victoria was too wrung out to cry, but her eyes glazed over as she stopped seeing Liam and the hospital and instead her vision swam to show her the moment she came upon the bloodied body of her mother. “He had her murdered. She died… because of _me_.” Victoria thrust her clenched fist against her own chest, beating her body to punctuate her words. “ _I_ got my mom killed. And that unleashed my fathers own cruelty in me. I thought I was a normal girl, just trying to get by despite him and his upbringing, but it was always inside me, lying dormant, just waiting for a spark. Finding my mom dead did that.” Victoria pressed the fist to her forehead, her other hand joining its partner. “I’d made a deal with some very bad people and they wanted something in return. They wanted to ruin everything Jimmy had built so I helped them. The scars on my back are my fault. I waited until my dads' members were meeting in their clubhouse and I locked them inside. I barred every door, every window and then Franks crew threw gasoline everywhere.” She dropped her hands, staring at him with unwavering blue eyes. “They all burned alive. And I was stupid because when I went to leave the burning clubhouse, Frank wouldn’t let me.” Victoria was shivering now, but her gaze remained fixed on Liam's unreadable face. “I was stupid because I let my rage blind me to the fact that of course, Frank would want something more in return. He wanted me dead or married to his son, to secure the last vestige of Jimmy's crew. I was sixteen and he wanted me to sign up to a life with his son who was ten years older than me, and I almost took it just to get out of that fire.” Her breath hitched. “I should have just given up then and let the fire have me, but when the roof started falling in and set me alight I panicked. It hurt like hell and I agreed and they got me out. But the moment I could I ran. I ran and they shot at me. I still don’t know how, but somehow I survived and made it to the road, to get a ride to the hospital.” Victoria sighed, the final parts of her story whispering over her lips. “With his club in ashes there was no protection for him behind bars and Jimmy was murdered. I am responsible for the deaths of those twelve club members as well as my moms' death and my dads. I am a murderer. That’s why I changed my name and ran away.”

Liam turned away and walked down the corridor a few steps. Victoria watched him go. She had never spoken of that night to anyone before. It didn’t feel good to admit. “Your father used his power to try to drive me out of court. My father was a criminal gang leader. We have the makings of terrible cruelty in us. What gifts we would pass on to our children.”

This made Liam turn about, his mouth drawn, his brow raised. He marched back up to her. “Victoria, you are not a murderer. Our fathers made choices that were harmful and awful, that much is true, but we acted within the confines of their control.” Liam grasped her arms and brought his face back to hers. “You did what you had to do to _survive_. I did what I thought was best to keep you safe. I am so sorry that my actions brought you further distress, but I was trying to protect you. Our children…” he paused, gathering his thoughts, reaching out his palm to ghost over her forehead, his trembling fingers smoothing out the lines of consternation on her face. “… would have parents who would love them fiercely and defend them with every fibre of our being. I will say again: if you do not love or want me then I will accept that, but don’t leave because of the sins of our fathers. Don’t let their actions shadow our lives. Whatever you did to get away from that life, you did it because you had to. You were only a child. You mustn’t punish yourself forever.”

Victoria's head was heavy and it felt forward onto Liam's chest. He pulled her closer and held her tight. “I just don’t think I can do this anymore.” She whispered. “I don’t know if I could marry you even if by some miracle we manage to track down Tariq and clear my name. Maybe you should just let me go.”

Liam didn’t speak for a long time, but he held her in his embrace and stilled her shivering with his touch. Victoria shut her eyes. Everything was so messed up. At least Liam knew the truth about her scars. Knew the worst things she had done, the darkest place she had ever gone and come back from. She had spoken the words that she had thought would break her to say out loud. “They got me, you know. When they shot at me. I took three bullets; two shot me clean through, the third lodged in my back.”

“I’ve seen it,” Liam answered softly. “I’ve seen all of you, Victoria.”

Victoria reached her hands up and touched his back, wordlessly returning his embrace. They stood quietly for a short while longer. Then Liam spoke again.

“We should get you back to the hotel,” he said. “You should take some time to think about what you want. Really think about it. You do have options, after all.”

It took Victoria a moment to realise that Liam meant both where she could live, Cordonia or the States, but the thick way his words came out indicated to her that he also meant who she could choose. Him or Drake. The choice between the man she had thought of as safety and home or the man who loved her without knowing half of her history and still wanted to save her.

But still, she nodded and together they found her a car. Liam kissed her softly on the temple before she got into the car. Then he returned to his father.

*

Walking back into the hotel, Victoria was bone weary. She reflected back on everything that had happened that evening. From hearing Constantine's confession to giving her own to Liam. He had far too readily swept aside the notion of her as a killer. There were too many stars in his eyes when he looked at her, that much was apparent. She could not understand it, had no idea what she had done to present herself as such a perfect specimen to him. She had expected him to turn and flee when she told him the story of the fire, but he had just stood before her and told her that it hadn’t been her fault. Insane.

Victoria headed for the lift and rode it up to her floor. It was late now, though she wasn’t sure of the exact time. As she rounded the corner from the elevators, she wandered through an area filled with chairs and sofas. She was busy finding her phone to check the time when she heard her name and looked up with a start. Drake, Hana, Maxwell and Olivia were all in the lounge area. Olivia and Drake were both standing at opposite sides, while Hana and Maxwell were sitting, though they rose as they saw her.

“What are you all doing up?” Victoria croaked in shock.

“Waiting for you, Quinn,” Drake replied. He took in her bedraggled appearance, her make-up streaked face and jerked towards her, holding back at the last moment. “Are you OK? You look…”

“First you and Liam disappeared and then the Queen Mother ran out,” Hana explained saving Drake from the struggle of finding words to describe her appearance that wouldn’t offend. “We didn’t have a clue what was going on.”

Maxwell bounded over to her, taking her arm gently. “We were worried about you.”

“I wasn’t worried,” Olivia said haughtily. “I was just hoping to learn if you’d gotten any further along with the investigation.”

“She was worried,” Maxwell said in a loud whisper. Olivia’s eyes narrowed. “Er… but she hid it really well.”

Drake met Victoria's eyes across the room. “Did you get a chance to speak to Constantine.”

“I did.” Victoria nodded. There was no-one around but even so, she felt like this would be the wrong place to talk frankly. “Let’s go to my room.” She said starting along the corridor, confident they would all follow. Nobody could resist that kind of cryptic half answer after all.

Once inside her friends gathered amongst the small suite and Victoria sat on the edge of the bed where Maxwell had perched. “I talked to Constantine after the doctors at the hospital stabilised him.”

The reaction was immediate. “What?” Drake gaped.

“This doesn’t feel like my news to tell,” Victoria said hesitantly. “But I don’t see how I can explain it fully without talking about it. Please don’t repeat this to anyone, OK?” Satisfied that they all agreed, Victoria started to discuss the reasons why Constantine did what he did. “This cancer… it’s killing him. Undoubtedly. I think it forced him into some rather rash decisions.”

“It’s hardly rash to plan this kind of hate campaign,” Drake said darkly. Olivia was thoughtful as Victoria looked to her.

“He didn’t think either of us would be the right choice for Liam,” Victoria said. “He said he was sure I could imagine why he thought you’d be a poor choice. Given that I don’t doubt you could single-handedly keep every enemy from even getting close to Liam, I suspect he meant that you are too rash politically and speak your mind. I don’t see those as failings, personally.”

Olivia looked over at her. “How dare he.” She said coldly. Victoria hadn’t told the others about the truth behind Olivia's blackmail letter, but she knew this was on Olivia's mind right at that moment. “How dare he? If not for him I could have… I could have…” Then her face fell and she looked for a brief second like she might cry. It was a disconcerting expression on the redheads face. “I guess it doesn’t matter now. Poor Liam. He must be heartbroken.”

“I can’t believe it.” Drake was saying, shaking his head slowly. “It’s a lot to take in.”

“At least you now know what his motives were,” Hana said, ever finding the silver lining. “Why he did this to you.”

“To both of us,” Olivia added darkly.

Victoria sighed. “I can’t imagine what he’s going through, but the thought of trying to forgive him… I don’t think I ever will.”

“Good,” Olivia said leaping to her feet. “He doesn’t deserve forgiveness.”

Maxwell had been the quietest so far, listening in silence. Now he sat beside Victoria working his hands in his lap. “I mean… he’s _really_ sick. People change when they get that sick. Everything changes.” He shrugged lightly. “Maybe he lost his head a little bit…”

Victoria glanced at him. Was he talking about Constantine? Or his parents? She slipped an arm through his.

Drake had gotten up, too. “Nothing excuses what Constantine did. If he even wants forgiveness, he’ll have to do more than just apologise.”

“He didn’t actually apologise to me, anyway,” Victoria admitted. “To Liam, yes, but not exactly to me. He did tell me it wasn’t personal.” Both Drake and Olivia snorted at this and it felt oddly satisfying to have them on her side to hate Constantine on her behalf.

“So, what’s next for us, Victoria?” Hana wanted to know. “We still need to find Tariq, right?” Victoria nodded.

“Yeah. Liam made Constantine promise to help so I guess I can relax for once.” Victoria said. “I don’t have to be afraid of that anymore.”

As she spoke those words aloud, she realised she meant them. _She didn’t have to be afraid anymore._ The worst had happened and she’d been made to feel unsafe, but now Constantine was backing off and standing down. She didn’t have to look over her shoulder every moment any more. It was a strange feeling. She’d gotten so used to feeling scared constantly again. Maybe now she could breathe.

*

Victoria hadn’t realised she was asleep until the knocking at the door woke her with a start. She sat bolt upright, every moment of the day before flowing through her brain all at once and she rubbed her eyes to clear the stream of colour and sound. It didn’t help. A second knock sounded and she groaned. “Give me a break, Maxwell,” Victoria muttered as she pulled herself off the bed and staggered to the door to open it up.

“Hello, Victoria,” Liam said with a smile. Victoria froze, halfway through a yawn. “May I come in?”

“Liam…” she said stupidly. “It’s very early.”

“I know.” He replied. “I’m sorry if I woke you up. May I still come in?”

“Er, sure.” She said, closing her mouth and stepping aside. She was too confused by the sight of him to think straight. “Is everything alright? Your dad…?” she asked as she shut the door behind Liam.

Liam shook his head. “He’s fine.”

“So… what are you doing here?” Victoria wanted to know, trying not to come off as unwelcoming. “Not that I’m not happy to see you.”

A look of relief passed over Liam's face as she said this. Victoria hadn’t even realised that was in doubt until she spoke the words, but evidently, it was a worry for Liam.

“I…” he started, but another knock rang from the door. Victoria rolled her eyes.

“That’ll be Maxwell,” she said. “Hold that thought.” Victoria pulled open the door to find not Maxwell, but Bastien standing before her. “Bastien?”

“Good morning, Lady Victoria.” he nodded. Before Victoria could think of anything else to say, Liam was suddenly there, gently tugging her behind him, planting himself between her and Bastien. A glance at his face showed drawn brows, deep blue eyes fixed on the security officer before him. His back was rigid.

“What do you want?” Liam growled.

Victoria's own eyes were wide as she took in the scene. She hadn’t expected to see Bastien at all, but she would never have guessed that this would have been the reaction from Liam.

To his credit, Bastien didn’t flinch. He stood outside the room with his hands clasped behind his back, a neutral expression on his face. “Lady Victoria, Your Majesty. I admit I hadn’t expected to find both of you here, but perhaps it’s for the best.”

Victoria placed a hand on Liam's shoulder, feeling his muscles tense beneath her palm. She peered around him to look at Bastien. “What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been ordered by the King Father to assist your search for Lord Tariq.” He said simply. “I’m here to share what I’ve learned.”

Liam glanced over his shoulder at Victoria. “With everything you’ve done to Victoria how can we be sure we can trust you?”

Victoria was watching Bastien's face and so she caught the flicker of hurt in his eyes. For a moment she almost felt bad for him.

“Everything I have done in the past has been under the orders of my sovereign. That’s you now, King Liam, and if you ask me to leave I will, of course, do so at once, but…” Bastien's gaze landed on Victoria. “I do want to help. If I can make up for my past actions in a small way by helping now, then I want to do that.”

“Liam,” Victoria said, putting some pressure where her hand lay, gently tugging him back. “Let’s hear him out.” She supposed it made sense. Bastien's involvement against her hadn’t come as a great betrayal for her as it had for Liam and Drake. Bastien was someone designated to watch over Liam and she had been the cause of Liam disappearing from his watchers' sight. It would have been strange if she and Bastien had not felt some animosity between them, she thought. Whereas for Liam and Drake, Bastien was a trusted ally, a friend even and for them, his actions against her was a shocking breach of trust. No wonder Liam was prickly about it now.

Liam nodded though and moved aside to let Bastien in, still keeping to Victoria's side as if for her protection. Victoria couldn’t help but feel her mind launch backwards to only a few months ago when she had come back to court and how she and Liam had barely touched. Now he was beside her, his arm against hers, ready to defend her physically if it came to it. It made her head spin to think on it for too long.

Bastien stood back, keeping his arms behind him, the better to display a non-threatening stance, Victoria reckoned. Before they began listening to Bastien there was one thing she needed to clear up. “Bastien? That night my drink was spiked… was it you?”

Liam glanced between them, his frown deepening as he waited for the answer.

“No. I don’t know what happened to you that night.” Bastien said. “Only that you appeared to need a doctor.”

Victoria nodded. “Thank you.” It was both a relief and a concern to know that Constantine had not engineered her drugged drink.

“Here’s what I know,” Bastien was still talking. “After organising the photographs I didn’t really keep an eye on Tariq. Once the photos went public the night of the Ball, I escorted you—”

“Dragged.”

“…very well. I dragged you out.” Bastien corrected without complaint. “I returned to the palace and it was then I realised I hadn’t seen Lord Tariq since Applewood. I assumed he’d gone to his family estate, but…”

“If he were there, we’d have found him by now?” Victoria finished. Bastien nodded.

“Precisely.” Bastien nodded. “I confirmed last night that Tariq has not been home since the Social Season.”

“What has been doing this whole time, then?” Liam asked, an edge in his voice. “While Victoria has been here fighting to clear her name, how has Lord Tariq been enjoying himself?” Victoria squeezed his hand again.

“Travelling, or so I can ascertain,” Bastien explained. “The last count I have of him was recently, where he boarded a plane with a one-way ticket to Los Angeles.”

“California?” Victoria asked, surprised. “What does he want there? Does he have family or friends in America?”

Liam shook his head thoughtfully. “I don’t believe so. His family are strictly Cordonian and as for friends, well… Tariq is really the sort of man who collects wool coats rather than friends.”

“Shocker.” Victoria quipped sardonically. But then she had a thought. “Wait, that’s it! The coats.”

“The coats?”

“What does L.A. have going for it that might attract a shallow, vapid, snob?” Victoria asked, to a silent room. She rolled her eyes. “Retail. I bet Tariq is shopping his little heart out right now.”

Liam started to nod. “Of course. And knowing him…”

“…there are only so many shops that would be swanky enough for him, right?” Victoria finished.

Bastien shrugged. “It’s a decent enough lead. I’ll start researching the right stores.”

Liam held up a finger. “Wait, wait. We can save time by combining forces. You with your expertise at tracking wayward nobles down and we with our best clothing expert.”

Victoria smiled as she caught Liam's meaning. “Maxwell.”

Bastien's calm facade slipped for the first time. “Maxwell Beaumont? That is the Maxwell you mean?”

“The one and only.” Liam nodded. “Maxwell knows luxury clothing brands and he sets people at ease. He can get answers by getting people talking.”

“You want me to work with him on a delicate investigation?” Bastien asked slowly. “ _Maxwell Beaumont_?”

Victoria narrowed her eyes. “If you say my friends name like that one more time I’ll… well, I won’t be happy.”

“Nor will I,” Liam said. It felt good to be standing beside him taking charge of the situation. And his hand was still in hers. That didn’t hurt.

“Good lord, you’re serious,” Bastien said, eyes wide.

“Who do you think helped us figure out that you were behind those photos?” Victoria asked.

Bastien barely held back his sigh. “Very well, I’ll enlist his service.” Then he bowed to them both. “Your Majesty, Lady Victoria.”

As he turned to leave, he opened the door to find Maxwell just outside poised to knock.

“Hey Victoria,” Maxwell greeted her first, overlooking the men at first. “Oh, Liam!” He grinned, then finally focused on the man before him. “Wait, why is Bastien here?”

Bastien clamped a hand down on Maxwell's shoulder. “You’ll be coming with me, Lord Beaumont.”

“What?” Maxwell didn’t fight, but he glanced at Victoria with concern. “Victoria?”

“It’s OK Maxwell,” Victoria smiled. “He’s working with us.”

“Ohhh,” Maxwell said with a nod. “Like a double agent? That’s cool.”

“That’s not quite…”

“I’ll explain while we walk.” Bastien cut in, directing Maxwell to the door.

“I’ll see you later—” Maxwell called as the door shut behind them leaving Liam and Victoria alone.

It was then that Victoria remembered that they were still connected by their hands and as her brain realised this she looked down at their entwined fingers. Liams thumb moved to rub along her knuckles. “I, er…” he began in a deep voice. “I’m glad to have Bastien on our side again.”

Victoria's gaze travelled up his arm to his face. He was still looking down at their hands. She wasn’t entirely convinced that he hadn’t been about to say something else, but had changed his mind. “Yeah, it’s definitely a strange feeling to know who was behind the conspiracy and to know I don’t have to worry about it anymore.”

Liam looked up and smiled. “I’m glad for that. I’ve been so worried about you this whole time. It’s nice to focus on something else for a while.”

“Oh?” Victoria asked. With just the two of them in the hotel room the air suddenly felt charged, with Liam's fingers causing small flurries of excitement zipping up her arm. She could barely remember the tension the night before as she’d confessed her history to him and been so unsure of their future together. “What’s pulling your focus now?”

“Lately all I can think of is how close we are to clearing your name,” Liam said warmly. “I know I can never undo what was done to you and we can never get these months back… and I know you have a lot to think about before you decide what or who you want… but I want you to know how much I care for you, Victoria. No matter what your past holds, I… I want to be a part of your future.”

She looked up into his eyes, feeling the devotion rolling off him for her. The social season and these past months had had her doubting his feelings for her at times, or suspecting it was a one-sided affair on her part, but this moment she wholly believed his words.

Liam turned around and took her other hand. “Victoria, I’m planning on telling Madeleine soon about the issue with her engagements. I promise I’m not rushing you or trying to put pressure on you—”

Victoria was not in control of her actions as she leaned forward and rose on her tiptoes to cut off his speech with her lips. Liam responded immediately, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close, kissing her back with fervour. Victoria's own arms were around his waist, just resting her hands on his back. It was a chaste kiss, all things considered, but there was so much wanting in it. Liam's lips were warm and felt good on hers like they belonged there. The smell of his aftershave was all around her and everything felt so familiar. Like returning home after a long time away.

And yet. A part of Victoria was not giving herself over to him, a part held back. A part that thought about New York and the Coronation Ball and the papers and even Drake. Not one single thought was enough to stop the kiss, but these thoughts were there nonetheless, keeping her back from Liam even as she kissed him.

After a while they drew apart, Liam gazing down at her with eyes full of fire. He reached up and brushed her hair away from her face. “Victoria…”

“I do love you,” she said, her mouth acting of its own accord. Apparently, her body was entirely betraying her this morning. “I don’t want you to doubt that. And I know it might seem unfair that I can’t give you a clear answer just yet…”

“Not at all,” Liam said softly. “I understand that you need time. I probably shouldn’t have bothered you this morning, I did promise to give you space, but… it’s hard to stay away from you.”

As Victoria was leaning in for another kiss, the door knocked again and she paused halfway to his lips and smiled. “It’s like a damn bus station in here today.” She split off from Liam and opened the door to find Hana outside. “Hi, Hana.”

“Oh, hello Liam,” Hana said with a smile. “Victoria, we have a function to get to soon. I thought I could help you decide what to wear?”

“That’s great because I have no idea what we’re doing today,” Victoria said with a chuckle at herself. “Maxwell was called away before he could tell me.”

“I’ll leave you to it,” Liam said with a nod to the ladies. “Lady Victoria, Lady Hana. Until later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by the amazing and wonderful Brandi Carlile, The Story. 
> 
> A big song for a big chapter. I'm not gonna lie, this is a scary one for me. Playing with the secrets of Victorias past was fun and exciting and now I'm pulling back the curtain and revealing the wizard plucking the strings (sorry, spoilers for The Wizard of Oz...) and I'm worried it won't live up to it! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy it and thank you for reading this so far!


	18. Half the World Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria and Madeleine have a very polite face-off as the tour makes a surprise detour.

_You can’t give me the dreams that were mine anyway_

One thing British society did better than anyone else was high tea. This was immediately apparent when Victoria and Hana walked into the room that had been filled with tables piled high with multi-tiered platters of sandwiches and petit fours. Teapots brewed on each table made the room smell of delicate steamed leaves. Her stomach growled. She was ready to take a moment and do something as easy as eat nice food and drink tea and just relax.

“This looks lovely,” Victoria said. Now that they had crossed over into December, the room was decorated with swathes of leafy garlands and candles, with tall and imposing Christmas trees in each corner. The smell of cinnamon and citrus permeated the air, mingling with the tea. Hana nodded and peered at the seating arrangement for their spot. Behind her came a pointed cough and Victoria turned to see Madeleine and Liam, followed by Adelaide and Regina.

“Lady Victoria,” Madeleine said flatly. “You’re blocking the entrance.”

“I believe what Madeleine meant was, it’s a pleasure to see you, Lady Victoria.” Liam corrected with a smile. Victoria smiled back, for once not entirely caring if the entire court saw the smile and had opinions on it. She wasn’t exactly draping herself over him after all; they could share a smile.

Adelaide snorted. “Oh, my daughter always says precisely what she means to say.” Madeleine flashed angry eyes at her mother.

“Your Highness, Duchess Adelaide,” Victoria said with a nod to each in turn. “How lovely to see you.” She paused on Regina, hesitating rather than ask outright about the King Fathers health. She wasn’t sure exactly who knew outside of her own confidantes. “I hope everyone is well.” She settled on eventually. Regina did not miss the meaning.

“Yes, of course.” She replied. “Just a little tired, but nothing serious.”

“That’s good to hear.” Victoria stepped aside and the older women headed through to find their table. Liam lingered and Madeleine stopped to watch as her fiancé looked over Victorias outfit; a seemingly simple tea dress, but one which drew inspiration from Hanas homeland. It was red with a high neckline and lace across the bodice. It was the loveliest dress Victoria had seen for a while, though she was amused that both Olivia and Hana had selected dresses for her in practically the same shade of red. Not a colour she usually chose for herself, but it was proving popular with Liam, who looked approvingly over the dress.

“That dress looks… that is, it has a marvellous design.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty,” Victoria said with a small curtsy. “Lady Hana designed it. Isn’t it creative?”

Hana pinked nearby. “It’s just something I enjoy.” She said shyly.

“You designed this dress?” Madeleine asked with a frown. “You?”

Victoria felt a rumble of irritation form in her stomach and she nodded. “Yes, that’s right. Lady Hana is very talented at most things, but her taste in dresses and her eye for detail is impeccable, don’t you agree?”

Madeleine sniffed. “I suppose.” Victoria rolled her eyes as Madeleines gaze moved from her to Hana, though Liam caught it and Victoria could see he was trying not to smile in response. The urge to reach for him was so strong, especially as they were now sharing this amusing moment together. She would never have believed this would have been possible back in September after the Ball.

“Lady Hana,” Madeleine was saying, her voice smoother and nicer than it had been when Victoria was speaking to her. “I would love to borrow you for a moment. I have neglected you lately and I feel simply dreadful about it. Please, come and sit with me and spend some time with Lord Neville and Rashad. They have missed you so.”

Victoria kept her face neutral at the sound of Neville's name, the most persistent of the lords who had made moves on her over the past few months. Hana looked surprised and glanced at Victoria.

“Oh, but I have been seated with—”

“I know, I organised the seating chart,” Madeleine said with a small laugh. “But it might be more fun to change things up a little, especially as I know your parents are eager for some news regarding suitors. That is… if Lady Victoria can do without you for the next hour or so?” She turned her green-eyed gaze on Victoria who smiled thinly.

“Sure,” she said as Liam observed this exchange. “I won’t keep Hana all to myself; I know she has obligations and as you have been so persistent to tell me, Countess Madeleine, sharing is so important.” She shifted almost imperceptibly towards Liam as she spoke, her eyes boring into Madeleines. Madeleine’s mouth pinched into a small pout as she took in the gesture. Victoria knew this must have been a surprise to her, given how Victoria had spent months telling her she wasn’t after Liam and would be leaving soon. This, on the other hand, was fighting talk. Political and subtle, but fighting talk nonetheless. In this world, she might as well have thrown down a gauntlet. Victoria smiled and turned to Liam. “Enjoy the tea, Your Highness. Hana, I’ll catch up with you later.”

And Victoria stepped around the small group to find her own table.

“Quinn, over here!” Victoria looked over to see Drake waving from a lacy table. “I thought I’d be stuck drinking alone.”

“Perish the thought,” she said as she slipped into her seat. “Hana has been kidnapped by Madeleine and I gather Maxwell is still busy so it might be just you and me for a moment.”

Drake grinned and didn’t look like he minded that at all. “Well, while I do have you for a bit, I was wondering how you felt about me taking you out sometime.”

Victoria faltered. “Oh!” she said, her eyes wide. “I…”

“I’m not asking you to run away with me or marry me or anything,” Drake seemed amused that he’d caught her out with his simple question. “Just a dinner date, you and me. You had that date with Liam back at the Beaumonts and I’m a big enough man to admit that I’ve been jealous ever since. Come on, no expectations or pressure. Just you and me and a good drink.”

Victoria found herself smiling despite herself. “If that’s a Drake-date then we’ve already had plenty of those.”

Drake grinned and grabbed the teapot to pour. “Yeah, but this time I can actually admit it’ll be a date. You’ve never seen Drake on a real date before. Aren’t you curious?”

“Ok, fine,” Victoria said accepting the porcelain cup from him. “I warn you though, I’m not an easy woman to date. I told Liam as much; I hate first dates and to be truthful dating, in general, isn’t my usual style.”

“I’ll be sure to blow you away then,” Drake said hiking an eyebrow. Victoria smirked as she added a sugar cube to her cup. Maybe a night out with Drake would be good for her to get away from it all. She hadn't confessed her deepest, darkest secrets to Drake so there was a certain appeal to spending some time with him after all. Her face settled into a warm smile as she looked at him. The least she could do was give him some of her time after the way she'd treated him. 

“Don’t you two look cosy,” came the voice of Olivia making her jump as she sat down beside Victoria, opposite Drake, who sighed.

“Olivia.” he deadpanned. “What a pleasure.”

“Indeed.” She replied, handing him her cup. He took it begrudgingly and dumped tea into it, thrusting back across the table.

“Have you been exiled with me and Quinn?”

“Not as such,” Olivia explained. “But there was only one other available table and you both looked rather lost on your own.”

Victoria chuckled at Drakes dark glower over the table. “The more the merrier,” she said. “But you know you can admit we’re friends.”

“I…” Olivia huffed. “You are marginally less irritating than people like Penelope.”

“High praise.” Victoria smiled.

“That’s practically a confession of love.” Drake snorted.

“We’re basically besties by now.”

“Oh do be quiet the pair of you or I shall be forced to endure hours of poodle talk after all,” Olivia complained. She took some food and then cast her eyes over the empty fourth chair. “Speaking of puppies, where is that boy?”

“Maxwell?” Victoria asked with a laugh. “He’s working.”

“No, he’s not.” Drake nodded and Victoria turned to see Maxwell himself walking up to the table and sitting down between Olivia and Drake. “Where have you been?”

“Hello, all.” Maxwell grinned, grabbing a cucumber sandwich and stuffing it straight into his mouth before replying. “I’ve been looking into Tariqs whereabouts! We got a tip that he’s in L.A. somewhere. Hiding deep undercover.”

“You have Maxwell Beaumont tackling a delicate investigation?” Olivia asked, askance. “Really?”

“You sound like Bastien,” Victoria smirked. “Who incidentally is working alongside Maxwell.”

“Really?” Drake asked. Victoria turned to him and nodded.

“He seems to want to make up for his involvement,” Victoria said softly. Drake nodded. “I think he’s genuinely sorry, unlike other parties.”

Drake looked sombre as he took this in. “I’m glad he’s helping.” He said after a while.

“So what else have you discovered?” Olivia wanted to know. Maxwell helped himself to a small, perfectly formed black forest gateau before replying. Olivia wrinkled her nose at him stuffing his face but said nothing.

“OK, so Tariq’s in Los Angeles, we think,” Maxwell said around his full mouth. “We’re basically sure of it. So I called a bunch of high-end menswear stores, you know, the kinds where their pocket squares start at several figures and left them answerphone messages because, well, they’re all closed.”

“Oh right,” Victoria said glumly. “Thanks, time zones.”

“It’s fine, I’ll chase them up later,” Maxwell said. “But since there is some time to kill between now and then we might as well relax and drink tea!” He raised his cup and took a long swallow. “Mmm, delicious!”

Drake turned to Victoria and nudged his knee against hers, getting her attention. “How are you holding up, Quinn? We’re getting to the end game now.”

“I just want Tariq to face some consequences for what he did.” She said quietly. “I can accept that he was manipulated, but he still left afterwards and didn’t catch any of the heat that I did. It doesn’t seem right.”

“It’s not right.” Drake agreed, his eyes darkening in anger. “He deserves a fist to the teeth for what he did.”

“People say that vengeance is a dish best served cold, but trust me Victoria. It’s a delicacy at any temperature.” Olivia put forth, her face drawn in determination. Victoria nodded.

“How can you be so scary and yet so cool at the same time?” Maxwell asked Olivia, in equal parts awe and trepidation.

“Its a gift,” Olivia said, her lips pursed as she tried to downplay what she clearly took as a compliment. Drake chuckled.

“Or a curse.”

“I guess it’s a matter of perspective,” Victoria suggested. “Personally, as you’re on our side, I think it’s pretty great. But I could imagine the terror of being set against you, Olivia.”

Olivia slowly turned to look at Victoria, her brow arched. “I thought you said you weren’t scared of me last season, Victoria.”

Victoria shrugged. “Maybe I was a little.” She admitted. “You know you were trying to intimidate me and I’m not entirely ashamed to admit it worked a little bit!”

“Good,” Olivia said, sitting up straight and proud in her chair. Victoria laughed and caught sight of Liam watching from his table. He smiled as she saw him and she smiled back. Why not? She felt freer and lighter than she had in ages. Her wrist was still a mess and she would bet that she was gaining a new small set of scars from this time, but the stitches had dissolved and her skin had knitted back together. Maybe Liam was right and she was a survivor after all. She was here and she wasn’t going anywhere. No matter what.

As the tea drew to a close Madeleine and Liam made a toast to thank their royal hosts and everyone for coming. It was a short speech, direct and to the point, but Madeleine had something up her sleeve for the ending. Liam was clearly surprised as she called for attention for just a few moments longer. “…we’ve been so honoured to have you all travel with us around Europe on our engagement tour and as a small surprise I am delighted to announce a little detour.” Liam looked shocked at her words but arranged his features into a mild expression as he listened. Victoria narrowed her eyes as Madeleine talked. She looked far too pleased with herself for this to be anything good. “As some of you may know my husband-to-be took a trip to New York before the start of the social season earlier this year and fell in love with the place,” Madeleine said. “As a fun jaunt for him and all of you, I have arranged for us to fly to New York tomorrow for a few days before returning to Cordonia for the final preparations for our nuptials. It will also be an opportunity for the court to say goodbye to Lady Victoria, who has expressed a desire to return to her homeland after spending so much time with us all.” Liam’s eyes snapped to Victorias, as she gritted her teeth.

“That conniving…” Olivia was muttering beside her as Victoria held very still to hear the rest of Madeleine's speech.

“We’ve dearly loved having her, but now is the time to make our farewells. So, if you will charge your glasses, we can make a toast to the future of Cordonia and to Liam and my wedding in a little under three weeks.”

Victoria held up her glass with the rest and stared daggers at Madeleine.

“Victoria, this could be good,” Maxwell whispered across the table. “At least we’ll be in the same country as Tariq. Madeleine might have done us a great favour for our search.”

“That’s true,” Drake said, his brown eyes watching Victoria with concern.

“Let’s turn her move into our advantage.” Olivia determined.

Victoria looked at all three, then over to Hana who was watching from afar and finally Liam, who had a tight expression on his face as he observed Madeleine. Victoria nodded. “You’re right. Madeleine doesn’t know who she’s messing with.”

*

As the last of the guests departed and Madeleine and Liam climbed into their car for the royal motorcade to travel back to the hotel, he cleared his throat. Madeleine turned, looking rather smug. “So, New York? That is a surprise.”

“I know,” Madeleine said with a smile. “I wasn’t sure we would be able to take the time, but I’m so glad I was able to fit this in. It really will be a nice ending to the tour.”

“I suppose so,” Liam said carefully. “Although the tour doesn’t truly end until we’re back in Cordonia.”

“Ah, but once we’re back home we will have to focus entirely on the wedding.” Madeleine pointed out. “It’s been difficult to make plans on the road. Some things I will need to arrange in person.”

Liam’s hand rubbed along his jawline. “Yes, it must have been very hard for you.”

Madeleines eyes quirked as she considered him. Liam knew he was skating closer to outward derision, certainly more than he had done over the tour. Even in private he’d maintained a polite facade with her, and now he knew for certain that she had not been involved in the movement to oust Victoria he supposed he ought to have gone easy on her, not the other way around. But she was still a threat to his and Victorias future if there was one, and no matter what he resented that he had to spend time with Madeleine when he could have been with Victoria. Hearing Madeleine make any complaints about a time when she had everything and Victoria had been fighting to keep her head above water made Liam feel sick. “Though you’ll be one lady down when we return to Cordonia if you mean to leave Lady Victoria behind.”

Madeleines eyes widened in an approximation of surprise. “I am aware, but I can manage without. This seemed like the kindest move I could make, don’t you think?”

“Kindness? Really?” Liam retorted drily and Madeleine dropped all pretence in response.

“Liam, honestly,” she snapped. “Let’s be frank with each other for a moment, shall we? This thing with Victoria had to come to an end eventually. I know how you feel about her—”

“No, you don’t.” Liam cut in. Madeleine looked utterly confounded to have been interrupted and didn’t speak as Liam went on. “You have no idea of the depth and breadth of my love for Victoria. You want to be frank? Fine. Victoria will always be the love of my life. There’s nothing you can do to change that. I know you don’t care about love or about me or about happiness, which is why you can never understand the way we feel about each other, but there it is. Telling the court we’re planning to leave her behind in New York was a despicable move and you know that. I don’t respect underhand tactics. I don’t respect you. I don’t intend to leave Victoria behind, either, so you might as well know that.”

Madeleine’s lips were thin, her neck an angry red. “Oh, you mean for the woman you profess to love so much to watch us marry? I thought that was an untenable prospect for both of you.”

Liam looked at her for a long moment. There was so much he wanted to say to her, so much that would ruin Victoria's hard work. How badly he wanted to impress on Madeleine how much he loathed her and how much he adored Victoria. It didn’t matter that he knew Madeleine didn’t want him romantically, he still wanted to rub it in her face. What was it Victoria had said about him? That he held a capacity for cruelty inside him? Maybe at this moment, she was entirely correct. He wanted to hurt Madeleine, lash out and cause her some reaction. He had never thought he would be in a position to want to make someone cry, but thinking about all the tears that Victoria had shed hardened his heart.

The silence stretched thin and finally, Liam looked away. “No, I don’t want that.” He said, gazing out of the tinted window.

Madeleine seemed to claim that as a victory. “Well, then, you can see my reasoning for dropping her back home.” She sniffed, dusting some invisible lint off her skirt and arranging herself in her seat primly. “I shan’t expect thanks, but you never know. She did seem to respond to some of my training.”

Liam just shut out her words and watched the London streets go by.

*

Victoria arrived in New York the next day along with Maxwell and Justin, as Bertrand was still absent from her party. Stepping out of the cab back onto the ground of the place she thought of as home was a surreal experience. The hotel they were booked in at was much bigger than any she had ever even managed to get a job at. It stretched up into the skyline of Manhatten. Victoria followed, feeling more than a little jet-lagged. The eight hour flight had happened overnight, but because London was ahead of New York by five hours they had travelled backwards it felt and so it was still dark when they arrived. Too early for breakfast, but Victoria had slept on the flight and that had thrown her completely. She focused on putting one foot ahead of the other as she and the two men headed up in the elevator with bellboys transporting their luggage. Justin seemed impervious to jet lag and was in his usual position of tapping at his phone. Maxwell, at least, was displaying a much more comforting level of being similarly awake, yet exhausted as Victoria.

She stifled a yawn as they were walked to their rooms, all along the same corridor. Maxwell grunted and disappeared into his room to presumably collapse onto his bed fully clothed. Victoria for her part went into her room and headed straight for the window, taking in the view of Central Park that she could just about see from her room. She’d never seen her city from this angle and she was awestruck by the view. She took in a deep breath and smiled. The circumstances weren’t what she had expected, but she was glad to be back in her city for a time. But she didn’t intend to stay, despite Madeleine's machinations. She knew it the minute she’d arrived; she loved New York, but this was no longer her home. Cordonia was.

She turned and tipped the bellboy with a smile and as he left, the door was caught and pushed open. Victoria looked up as Justin ducked his head around the door. “Moment of your time?”

She nodded and he headed inside, slipping his phone into his pocket. Victoria nodded to the motion. “You must have a family we’re keeping you from with all this work. Or a girlfriend.” She cocked her head. “Boyfriend?”

Justin chuckled. “No, neither, and no family worth mentioning. I’m just checking in with work. Workaholic, that’s me. But it’s to your benefit.”

“I’ve no doubt,” Victoria replied. “What did you want me for?”

Justin took off his glasses and cleaned them with a cloth. Victoria smiled. “Those really are Clark Kent glasses. You look totally different without them.”

Justin grinned wryly and glanced up at her, his eyes dancing mischievously. “It’s my masterful disguise. Anyway, my reason for keeping you from your bed is that I wanted to apologise for my intensity the other day. When we all caught you with Drake.”

Caught was a troublesome word and Victoria frowned. It implied wrongdoing and she was adamant that she wouldn’t feel bad about her encounter with Drake. Still, she kept quiet and let him go on.

“I gather things are back on track with the King and that’s terrific.” Justin smiled, replacing his glasses, becoming a mild-mannered press secretary once again. “You know that’s the whole reason I’m here, to see you back with King Liam and heading for Queendom.”

“I guess,” Victoria said slowly, wishing Bertrand was back so she could double-check this with him. She was too tired to think straight. “I figured you were here to do damage control with the press.”

“Yes, that’s right, but the fact of the matter is that the Beaumonts have paid me a not small sum of money to get you down the aisle,” Justin said more pointedly. “With the King, not the Kings friend. I don’t want to be alarmist or gauche, talking about funds like this, but you know that the Beaumonts aren’t flush with cash right now. You can change that.” He caught her gaze and held it for a few beats. “Or you can lose it all for them. They would never want you to feel like this, so I’m overstepping my bounds somewhat, but you’re a smart girl and a friend to them. Don’t let them down, OK?”

With that, he winked and saluted, leaving her standing in her room with a frown on her face and worry in her mind.

*

What felt like the next day but was really later on the same day as their arrival in the States, Victoria opened the door to Maxwell Beaumont, who looked far too awake and put together for someone with jet lag. Victoria was dressed in an old favourite outfit of her black jeans, knee-high boots, and then layers of a t-shirt and a jumper with a warm coat and scarf to brave the East Coast in December. She had felt slightly aimless, but as it turned out she had a job to do.

Victoria blinked slowly as Maxwell explained the task. “Are you sure she wants me to do that? Me?”

Maxwell shrugged with a grim expression. “It’s pretty clear. Here.” He tapped his phone and set his voicemail to speaker so Madeleine's voice rang out for them both to hear:

“Maxwell, I have an absolutely _vital_ task for Lady Victoria to complete. As I will be busy with preparations for the wedding shower, I will simply have no time to go and pick up my wedding ring before our return to Cordonia. And I insist that she be the one to do it as a thank you for everything I’ve done for her and as a final task before she is no longer part of my entourage. Do impress upon her how important this is.”

Maxwell looked up at Victoria with an awkward expression. “I mean, it’s pretty clear…”

Victoria sighed and ran her hands over her face. “I guess it’s my fault for being combative to her back in London. She must be pretty pissed by me telling her I’d head back here and then suddenly I’m after her man again. When you put it like that I sound like the bad guy, don’t I?”

“You aren’t the bad guy.” Maxwell insisted. “We all know that.”

“Yeah, but neither is Madeleine, not really,” Victoria admitted ruefully. “She’s just an innocent bystander in this whole mess.”

“Innocent… I wouldn’t go that far.” Maxwell argued. “She is making you pick up her wedding ring after all. She knows what she’s doing.”

Victoria sighed again and reached for her phone and wallet, sliding them into the deep pockets of her coat. “Would she know if I didn’t get the ring? You could maybe go get it…?”

Maxwell winced. “I would if I could, but I’m due to meet Justin in a few minutes. He’s offered to help me track down Tariq and we’re physically a lot closer to L.A. now, so the minute we find him we can hotfoot it over to the other side of the country and bingo!”

Victoria smiled sadly as she wound her scarf around her neck. “Let’s hope we can find him. The wedding shower is the last stop before the wedding. We’re cutting it awfully close.”

“Liam won’t marry her,” Maxwell said confidently. “He’s still got to tell her that the engagement is void after all. Even if we don’t find Tariq tonight that’ll slow it down more.” Maxwell went over to Victoria and rested his hands on her arms. “And then you can marry Liam and have that happily ever after and everyone will be super happy.” His eyes were wide, his mouth stretched in a smile, but it made Victoria feel uneasy. The words of Justin reverberated in her skull from before. How much the Beaumonts had riding on her. How much she could mess up their futures. Olivia had always told her not to trust them…

Victoria plastered a smile on her face. “OK, well I best get going then.”

“Good luck Victoria,” Maxwell said as she headed for the elevator.

As the doors closed and she began her descent she muttered to herself: “Happy birthday to me.”

*

A few fat snowflakes had begun to fall as Victoria headed through the city. She bought a soft pretzel from a vendor to serve as a breakfast snack and pulled out her phone to check the address Maxwell had texted to her. She tapped her map app and realised she was not far at all; she could walk the short distance. She pulled a hat out of her pocket and pulled it on and, munching on her pretzel, she headed for the store. The snow was falling heavier by the time she reached the high-end jewellery store and so she paused on the threshold to kick the snow from her boots before heading inside.

“Quinn?”

Victoria looked up with an open mouth to find Drake standing across the room from her with a surprised look on his face. “Drake? What are you doing here?”

Drake shrugged. “It’s a store. Anyone can go into a store.” Victoria crossed the room towards him and he smiled a crooked smile as he took in her appearance. “You have snow in your hair.”

Victoria smiled back and brushed her hands through the dampness in her locks. “That would be because it’s snowing.”

“Your cheeks are pink.” Drake continued. “You look cute.”

Victoria switched to a scowl. “Don’t tease me, Walker. I’m not in the mood.”

“Too bad,” Drake said tartly. “You’re too adorable.”

Victoria rolled her eyes and pulled her hat off her head, not caring that her dry hair was reacting to the static on the crown of her scalp, while every other part had been snowed on and hung wet and lank around her shoulders. She certainly didn’t feel cute. “Come on, why are you here? Are you looking to start investing in diamond jewellery? Are you secretly loaded and planning on buying something like that?” She pointed a finger at a gold chain from which hung a diamond-encrusted medallion, glad the store attendants were all too busy to overhear her teasing at their merchandise. Drake headed over to her and snorted as he took in what she was gesturing at.

“Funny.” But he still looked shifty.

“Drake, what is it? I promise it’s not worse than why I’m here.” Victoria pressed. Drake sighed.

“Best man duties.” He said softly. “Picking up Liam's wedding ring.” Perhaps it wasn’t worse, but it hit her in the gut nonetheless. “You?”

“Snap.” She said sadly. “I’m getting Madeleine's ring.”

Drake's eyes softened as she spoke. “Damn. That’s cold. Even for her.” He ran a hand over his hair. “I thought it was bad enough getting Liams, but at least that’s my best man job, you know? Making you do it? That’s just cruel.”

“Yep.” Victoria agreed looking down at the tacky pendant again. “The last mission for me before she leaves me here in New York.” At this point, the store assistant came over to Drake with a small box and Drake turned slightly away from Victoria as if to shield her. She stood back and waited before the assistant moved to her and she gave him the order number and he disappeared into the back. “Come on, let me see it.”

Drake looked pained. “It’s just a ring, Quinn…”

“So, let me see.” She countered. He grimaced and slid the box to her. She opened the polished wooden box to find a simple, heavy gold ring nestled inside. There was nothing particularly special about it. It was, as Drake had said, just a ring. “It’s nice.” She said quietly. The assistant came back with a matching box that was open to her. She took in the smaller ring, the tiny diamonds laid in the band and the way the ring seemed to whisper of its elegance and class. If that tacky medallion shouted “Look at me!” this band just waited patiently to be observed and respected. It was classy and timeless. “It’s a lovely ring.”

Drake peered over her shoulder. “It’s a bit plain. I was expecting something more pretentious.”

Victoria was still looking down at the rings sitting side by side. “No, it’s lovely.”

“Yeah, well, you’d pick something tons nicer,” Drake said, trying to cheer her, but even he grew sombre at the sight of both rings together. “I guess it’s coming up pretty fast.” He murmured. “The wedding.”

“Yeah…” Victoria agreed just as softly. Drake’s arm came around her shoulder and his hand clamped on her arm.

“We’ll find Tariq soon, Quinn,” Drake said urgently. “We have to.”

Victoria felt her head drop onto Drake's shoulder beside her. She still hadn’t reached for the rings; they remained in their boxes looking like a couple on the counter. His and hers wedding rings. The promise of a long life conjoined. “You rushing off somewhere now, or do you have time for a drink?” She asked.

“I could drink,” Drake said. “The coffee here is supposed to be pretty good, right?”

Victoria looked up and managed a smile. “The best. And I know just where to go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Oasis, Half the World Away. 
> 
> When I played this game it never quite made sense to go out of Europe for the tour, so I decided to give Madeleine a chance to flex with this move to NYC. I always loved the dialogue and her rudeness at the start of the chapter so I had to keep it in.


	19. Let Her Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Madeleine's machinations, Victoria lets a secret slip that gives her a little bit of time with both Drake and Liam.

_Love comes slow and it goes so fast_

Drake followed Victoria through the snowy streets to the subway where they rode up north and tripped back out onto the sidewalks. The snow had started to settle in earnest and they crunched through an inch of fresh snow, arm in arm to keep from slipping. Victoria's face was flushed and although they had met on a sad shopping trip, being back in her old stomping grounds seemed to be doing the world of good for her. Her blue eyes sparkled against her cold skin, the rosy hues on her cheeks and her hair full of snowflakes again. Drake couldn’t quite believe how different she looked, how down to earth and normal compared to the majority of the time on the tour or during the social season. She wore a fancy gown very well, but Drake thought this version of Victoria was even more breathtakingly beautiful.

She led him down a street to a cafe that proudly proclaimed itself as Benitos’ Cafe and pushed her way inside the bustling building. It was busier than he would have anticipated, but Victoria dragged him to the queue where she greeted the Puerto Rican man behind the counter like she knew him and he clearly remembered her even though she couldn’t have been back in almost a year given her relocation to Europe. She grinned and laughed as the guy— Benito, Drake guessed— made comments about her being on a date with such a handsome man, and Drake chuckled awkwardly. When a woman came bustling out from the back wiping her hands on an apron coated in powdered sugar, his embarrassment intensified. The whole place was loud and warm, but Victoria was shining in its midst.

“No, he’s half Cordonian, half American.” She was explaining to the couple. “I don’t think he’s ever eaten Latin food?” Drake caught the question and shook his head. The woman clapped sending another flurry of sugar into the air and started piling different pastries and desserts onto a tray while Benito busied himself with the coffees. Victoria pulled out her wallet to pay, but Drake held up a hand.

“This was my idea, so let me pay Quinn.” He insisted. The corners of her mouth quirked but she stepped aside and let him. She also let him carry the groaning tray to a spot by the window where they sat opposite a small table.

“So, black coffee and the sweetest desserts you’ll ever taste,” Victoria said, unloading the tray. “And all made with the utmost of love and affection. Thanks for paying.”

Drake shrugged. “I wouldn’t have pushed it and there’s nothing wrong with going double Dutch, but I wanted to treat you.”

“I don’t mind,” Victoria said, swiping an alfajor from their horde of food. “It’s been a while since anyone treated me on my birthday.”

Drake took a sip of his coffee and nodded, but then his brain did a double-take. “What? Quinn…?

She nodded and glanced down at the bag with the rings inside. “It’s my birthday and I’m running wedding errands for Madeleine.”

Drake set down his cup. “Quinn, that’s awful. What do you want to do today?” She just shrugged.

“I don’t know really,” Victoria replied thoughtfully, turning her head slightly to gaze out the window to the busy street. “I guess I usually subscribe to the Drake Walker way of dealing with birthdays: I tend to spend them alone with a drink. I’ve never spent them with people who mattered before. I enjoyed my fake birthday though.” She smirked at Drake. “Thanks for letting me borrow your birthday in the summer.”

Drake chuckled, before snacking on a pastry filled with sweet fruit. “This is really good.” He said savouring the food before moving on. “I was happy to share it. So today’s your birthday. Which birthday, if you don’t mind me asking?”

Victoria smiled. “I’m sure you could figure it out, but it’s my twenty-ninth.”

“You’re the same age as Olivia,” Drake remarked.

“What about you?” Victoria asked. “It’s so stupid, but I never asked how old you or Liam were. I don’t even know when his birthday is.”

“We’re both thirty,” Drake said. “Liams older; his birthday is in late March. In fact, you met him only a few weeks after his thirtieth birthday. So, now you know.”

Victoria nodded but she looked uneasy. Drake wiped his fingers on a napkin. “What is it?”

For a moment she said nothing, then when she spoke it was slowly as if she were piecing her meaning together as she went. “There are so many basic things I don’t know about Liam. I know he intends to propose if the scandal is lifted and he breaks his engagement. If he’d asked me at the Coronation Ball I’d have said yes in a heartbeat. I’d been swept up by love and the fairytale and was ready to commit to him right then and then after only knowing him for six months.” She looked up and met Drakes watchful gaze. “Now, with everything that’s happened I’ve taken stock of my choices and although I don’t doubt the strength of our feelings, I don’t know if I can blindly go along with a marriage to a man I really don’t know that well.”

Drake swallowed and considered before replying. “I think… you do know him. The stuff that matters, I mean. So, you don’t know his exact date of birth— ask him. Then you’ll know. Everything else you already know.”

Victoria was fidgeting with the handle of her cup as he spoke, her eyes angled down at the table. Drake reached across and took her hand and she let him. It wasn’t easy, being here for her in this way when his heart wanted nothing more than to impress his own feelings on her. But she looked so sad and forlorn that he just couldn’t. “You guys know each other. Some people might spend years waiting for the right time to choose to get married, or not and instead you guys have this crazy situation where the marriage is a big deal. But forget about that for a moment. I know your trust was shaken at the Ball and since, but right now do you trust Liam?”

Victoria held his hand and her eyes roamed up to meet Drakes. He knew the answer before she spoke. “Yes. Since you figured out who was behind the conspiracy and we spoke with Constantine, I do. I don’t believe he’d hurt me again like that.”

“Trust matters,” Drake said. “If you trust him and you love him, you can be certain he feels the same for you. Maybe more. When you left… I’d never seen Liam like that. I don’t think he’d ever felt powerless before. Literally, the guy is broad and tough. When we spar he beats me nine times out of ten. And then he’s got his name and title to back that up. But that night, he was helpless and he couldn’t stand it. Knowing you were hurt because of him?” Drake’s eyes were dark as he remembered that night. “It was bad. If you say things are different after speaking with Constantine then they probably are. I know he wouldn’t ever want you getting hurt because of him ever again and he’ll move mountains to stop that from happening. Plus he has more power now. He’s the king after all.”

Victoria squeezed his hand over the table. “You’re a good man Drake.”

“You’ve said that before.” Drake sighed. “I’m not that great.”

“You’ve been a good friend to Liam and to me.” She went on. Her eyes were apologetic as she spoke and Drake knew. He’d always known, deep down, but hearing it now was the moment of breaking. Whatever little dreams he'd held were never going to be more than just that. He let go of her hand and withdrew it.

“It’s never going to be me, is it?” He asked softly, his voice gentle, not accusatory. Victoria just looked at him, her eyes damp with apology. “It’s not even a case of him seeing you first, I know. He was just better.”

“He was nicer.” Victoria corrected. “You reminded me too much of me at the start. By the time you started opening up to me, I was already gone. I’m so sorry.” Her face was drawn into the most sorrowful expression he had ever seen on a person before. Drake just smiled.

“I’m OK.” He lied sadly. “I’m happy to be in your life. I can live with knowing you’ll be happy without me if it’s with him.”

*

Liam had been going over some papers in his room when Madeleine interrupted him with some terribly important matter that had to be discussed right away, or so she had said. She had been talking for the past fifteen minutes and Liam was still none the wiser as to what she was talking about. The knock at his door was a welcome break. Madeleine, being between him and the door, smiled and went to open it.

“Hello, dears, thank you so much for running this errand.” He heard her saying. Liam’s gaze drifted back to the documents on his desk rather than listening to Madeleine simper. She was still droning on about how thankful she was and how vital the task was and how glad she was that it was done and then there was a rustle of bags and shoes on the carpet and Madeleine was looming over him again. He wanted to tell her to go away, please.

“Liam, darling, look our rings have arrived.” Madeleine was saying, placing the bag on top of his papers. “Go on, take a look.”

Liam went still and he could feel his jaw clench. He didn’t want to look at the bloody rings. He didn’t want to be reminded that the wedding was so close.

“Go ahead, darling, see?” Madeleine pressed, pulling out the boxes and laying them before him. “I must go over the final arrangements for the wedding shower while I’m here.”

Liam rolled his eyes as he looked up at Madeleine with a glare, but out of the corner of his eye, he spied two figures still in the doorway. Both stood awkwardly, hands in their pockets, averting their eyes. Drake and Victoria. Liam was up on his feet and had brushed passed Madeleine before he knew it.

Victoria raised her head to take in the sight of Liam approaching her, and he saw the exact moment she realised he was heading for her. She seemed to light up from the inside out and when she smiled he could feel it like sunshine on his face. He felt his mouth curl into a grin. “Hello.” He said simply. “Glad to see you crossed the Atlantic without peril.”

“Well, I travelled with a very grouchy Maxwell.” She replied. “So there was a little peril.”

Liam laughed. Drake let out a small but pointed cough. Not only had Liam entirely ignored his friends' presence, but it appeared that Madeleine was palpably trembling with wrath behind him. He glanced over his shoulder at her, standing with arms crossed and a deep scowl on her face. “You can look after the rings, Madeleine.” He said. She looked for a moment like she was going to argue, but then snatched up the boxes and stalked out of the room, passed Victoria and Drake with a look that could have killed. Liam shut the door behind her.

“Liam,” Victoria said chidingly. “You mustn’t be unkind to Madeleine.” Liam felt momentarily guilty but Drake snorted derisively.

“Oh please,” he scoffed. “Be as mean as you like, she deserves it.”

“What has she done?” Liam asked, then the pieces clicked in his brain. “Did she ask you to collect her ring, Victoria?”

“Well…” Victoria started, but Drake cut in.

“Of course she did and then she happened to be in your room when she sent a message asking Victoria to drop it off here,” Drake said, pulling out his phone and showing the message Maxwell had passed on to him. Liam glanced down and groaned.

“I’m sorry, Victoria,” he said. “I would have prevented it had I known.”

Victoria shrugged. “I don’t mind.” But he could see that she did. Drake looked like he was mulling something over for a moment.

“Liam, ask Victoria what day it is.” He said finally. Victoria shook her head and buried her face in her hands, hiding a smile. Liam frowned -- it might have been the run up to Christmas, but this day wasn't anything special in the calendar -- but turned to her.

“Victoria, what day is it?” He asked, bemused.

Victoria dropped her hands with a sigh and a stern glare at Drake that bore no genuine malice. “Today is my birthday.”

Liam's jaw dropped slightly. “It _is_? Happy birthday,” he said and before she could protest he pulled her into a hug. She didn’t seem to want to protest. “We should celebrate.”

“Victoria doesn’t celebrate apparently.” Drake drawled wryly. “She holes up and drinks alone. I can’t imagine why that would appeal to anyone.”

Liam chuckled over the top of Victoria's head. “No, indeed, who would want that?”

Victoria pulled away and looked up at the pair of them. “If you tease me I really will do that.” She threatened, but she was smiling.

“What would you like to do?” Liam asked, brushing her a lock of hair off her forehead. Victoria considered it for a moment.

“I don’t know.” She said. “I figure I’ll take in my city for a bit.”

“Do you have anything on tonight?” Drake asked, looking directly at Liam. Liam smiled.

“Nothing I can’t put off.” Madeleine wanted them to have dinner somewhere, but any tiny part of him that might have found that appealing was snuffed out at the thought of spending time with Victoria on her birthday. “Would you like to go out tonight, Victoria?”

She looked surprised and her gaze flickered to Drake and then back to Liam. “Just the two of us? Like… a date?”

Liam glanced to Drake as well, but Drake was smiling a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yes.”

“Don’t look at me,” Drake said. “I took her out earlier. Or she took me.”

“I am in the room you know.”

“I’m… it’s fine.” Drake said after a moment. “It’s fine. You two should go and be happy.” Liam got the sense that Drake was talking about more than just this one night and he swallowed around the lump that suddenly and surprisingly developed in his throat.

“OK.” He said to Drake. Then he looked at Victoria. “What time shall we meet?”

Victoria was mulling something over in her head. “I’m going to make some calls. I’m come and get you in a couple of hours. Dress down. Try and find something that’s actually casual.”

Liam laughed. “I’ll try my best.”

*

Victoria was putting the finishing touches onto her light makeup— very waterproof mascara, she was expecting to cry later— when Maxwell came knocking at her door. She let him in and he brought with him a frisson of energy. “Have you napped?” she wanted to know, smiling as she brushed her hair.

“No, better!” Maxwell enthused, his eyes bright. “Justin and I have been working hard today and we’ve managed to narrow down the search for Tariq to a few stores.”

“Really?” Victoria was genuinely impressed. “That’s amazing. So he’s _definitely_ currently in L.A.?”

“Yes, but not only that, we widened our net around those stores and found the most likely places where he could be staying.” Maxwell went on, clearly overjoyed to be peppering his language with phrases lifted straight out of spy movies. “We triangulated the proximity of high-end stores to fancy hotels with no connections to court and put pins in a map and everything. It was awesome.”

“A map?” Victoria set down the hairbrush and picked up her perfume, dabbing it on her wrists and behind her ears. “A real map of Los Angeles? Oh God, does your hotel room look like the home of a conspiracy theorist? Do you have red wool connecting images on your wall?”

Maxwell sighed. “Sadly not. That would have been cool. No, Justin used his laptop.”

“Oh cool.” Victoria frowned as she remembered Justin's words before. The Beaumonts were deeply invested in her becoming queen, maybe a lot more than she knew. A thump of guilt nudged her stomach as she thought of that investment in her and how she felt like she was finding problems with marrying Liam. According to Justin, they would lose so much if she didn't eventually become queen. “So, you’ve been working closely with Justin?” She asked hesitantly. Maxwell didn’t reply and Victoria glanced over at him, shocked by what she saw. It was odd enough for Maxwell to be so quiet, but his face was a poor attempt at concealment. He was blushing and not meeting her gaze. It hit her all at once. “Oh! I see.”

Now he looked up, those bright shiny eyes begging her to understand. “He’s just… so cool. I never thought he’d think someone like me was worth even looking twice at. But, you know… we’re quite close.”

Victoria considered. Justin had seemed like a superhero to her when he’d first appeared to help guide her and save her from the press. He knew what he was talking about and he was enthusiastically on her side. Bertrand seemed to like him, too, but Bertrand wasn’t here and it had all fallen to Maxwell. Victoria felt a jolt as she realised she wished Bertrand were here to weigh in on his brothers' infatuation. Justin was older, effortlessly smooth and lately, there had been a sense of urgency that would have made sense given the speed at which the wedding was approaching, but the particular way he’d put pressure on her recently had bothered her. Then there was his utter disapproval of her sleeping with Drake when it was nobody’s business, least of all his. She couldn’t help but shake this creeping feeling of concern for her friend.

Maxwell looked very happy and Victoria didn’t want to burst his bubble, at least not just yet. “That’s great Maxwell.” She smiled. “I think you should have an early night tonight though. You’ve been working really hard and the jet lag is bound to hit soon. It won’t be pretty when it does.” She was careful to avoid any mention of the bespectacled press secretary. Maxwell, sweet, trusting Maxwell, didn’t pick up on her true motivations at nudging him towards a quiet night in, and just grinned at her. She felt like a saboteur.

“Where are you off out to?” he asked, noticing that she was, despite her clothing guidance to Liam, more dressed up than her usual downtime attire. She still wore her black jeans and boots, but she had pulled on her only smart cashmere cardigan over a t-shirt that was hidden behind the mother of pearl buttons. Her hair was glossy and bouncy, and her eyes framed with black. Her hair had been parted at the side and was swept up on that side to be held in place with a golden clip that matched the light touch of gold on her eyelids and glinting off the hoops at her ears.

“I have a date.” She said coyly. She couldn’t stop smiling about it. It was embarrassing, except she didn’t care. She was excited to be taking Liam out in her city again and, after making some calls and pulling her last big favour, she had an exciting outing planned. Or so she hoped. At least she knew she would enjoy it.

“A date?” Maxwell frowned slightly.

“With Liam.” She clarified. Maxwell's face brightened immediately, twisting the small pin of suspicion inside her. Paranoia wasn't a path she wanted to start down and she tried to shake it off right away; Maxwell was rooting for his friends and glad they were spending time together. That was all. 

“Ooh, amazing!” But then he looked thoughtful. “Does Madeleine know?”

Victoria shrugged, still unsettled by her rollercoaster of trying to trust Maxwell and Justin. “Don’t know, don’t care right now. This is mine and Liams’ night. She can please herself.”

*

Just before she was about to leave Victoria heard her phone sound notification of a text message. She glanced at it expecting Maxwell, but it was an unknown number. The preview of the message before it cut off displayed a name that leapt out at her: “This is Liam…“. She grabbed the phone and unlocked it to open the message in full, scanning down the words. It was a message from Liam's phone, which explained why it came up only as a number. It was his private cell phone and detailed a plan to meet downstairs. Victoria grinned and programmed the number into her phone for the future. That was one thing to check off on her normalcy bucket list. Getting Liam's number.

She grabbed her wallet and rooms key card, and pulled her trusty leather jacket over her cardigan and headed out and to the elevator. She made sure to slip her key card in a high pocket away from her phone to prevent the phone from interfering with the card and her wallet in her deepest pocket. The doorman opened the doors for her and allowed her outside into the cool night. The snow had stopped and laid around her, a nod to silence in the city that never slept. Snow always felt quiet and peaceful, even here. Victoria took a deep breath, feeling her senses freeze over in the process. It was worth it.

“Victoria?” She turned with a bright smile to see Liam standing on the sidewalk and then she headed over to him. He had done very well with his brief, dressed in needlecord trousers and a warm looking burgundy jumper with a tan coat over the top. A scarf was wound around his neck, which almost matched the one Victoria wore. When she reached Liam, he took her hands in his and brought them to his lips, brushing them over her skin. She grinned wider. “Happy birthday again.” He said.

“Thanks.” Victoria took his arm. “Shall we?”

Liam let himself be directed by her given that she had the plan of the night’s activity in mind. They walked over the snow away from the hotel, their footprints leaving a tell-tale sign of two people walking closely. Liam held her hand on his arm as they went. “So, where are we going?” He asked as they walked.

“Not far,” Victoria admitted. “This hotel is perfectly positioned for what I have planned. Do you remember our first night in New York?”

“You mean the first time we met?” Liam asked with a smile. “How could I ever forget?”

“You remember that I called in a favour to get you to the Statue of Liberty?”

“Always.”

“I’ve called in another favour,” Victoria explained. “It’s probably my last favour I can get from New York and was tougher to arrange than getting a boat out to Lady Liberty after hours.”

Liam looked shocked and intrigued. “What on earth could be harder to sort out than that?”

Victoria looked up at the theatre they had arrived at. “There are probably a great many things a King can wave his hand and get delivered to him on a silver platter, but trust me, Hamilton tickets are not on that list. But it’s my birthday and I knew a guy who could help me out so tonight, Liam, even though you took me to the opera and I missed the whole thing, I’m sharing one of my great loves with you.” The excitement led to boldness and she rose up and pressed her lips to his right there on the sidewalk as people walked past them. They were practically invisible here anyway, just a pair of loved up nobodies on a date. Liam kissed her back, stroking his knuckles against her temple, catching her hair and deepening the kiss for a moment. He leaned his forehead against her after the kiss broke. He was smiling, his face was flushed. She was sure she matched him in kind.

“I can’t wait,” Liam said. “But first… I bought you a birthday present earlier.”

Victoria pulled back in surprise. “You did?”

“Victoria, of course, I did,” Liam said with a chuckle, reaching into his pocket. “I was out buying some ‘actually casual clothes’ so I picked a little something up for you.”

Victoria giggled at his impression of her and watched as he withdrew a small box, professionally gift wrapped. Liam offered the box to her and she took it after a moment's hesitation. “I hope you like it.”

Still, on the sidewalk Victoria pulled off the white satin ribbon and light blue paper, crumpling it in her hand. Liam took it so she could have a free hand to open the box under the paper revealing a pearl bracelet. Three strands of pale pink pearls wound around each other, coming together in a golden clasp. Victoria picked it out and held it up to the lights of the street and the theatre, watching as they played on the smooth beads. “Oh, Liam…” she breathed. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, certainly the nicest gift she had ever received, but putting it into words was proving difficult. She looked up from the jewellery to Liam's face, catching his apprehensive expression.

“Do you like it?” He asked, his fingers worrying the paper he held.

Victoria just nodded, her eyes full, her throat tight. She reached for him again and he came to her, kissing her again.

“Liam, it’s beautiful,” she said afterwards, the kiss breaking the spell of muteness. Liam shoved the paper and ribbon into his coat pocket and helped her put the bracelet onto her wrist. She held her arm aloft, to catch the light again. “It’s the nicest thing I’ve ever been given.”

Liam looked relieved. “I’m glad. I don’t know what drew me to the pearls, but they called to me. It was very overwhelming in the store.”

“Well, thank you for braving it for me.” Victoria smiled, taking his hand in hers. “I love them. I love the bracelet. I…”

Beside them, a group of young twenty-somethings burst into a loud rendition of _My Shot_ making them both start and look around. Victoria laughed. “Come on, let’s go inside. They are very good, but you need to experience this from the professionals!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Passenger because I've always found it a sad song and Drake is sad. 
> 
> So the secret is out to a few; it's Victorias birthday and the two men who love her have given her gifts. Drake has promised that he's ok with her loving Liam back and not him and Liam has gone back to canon with the pearl bracelet! 
> 
> And Victoria has learned of the closeness between Justin and Maxwell. I know this is very not canon, but I'm definitely playing to the manipulative nature of Justin and while Bertrand is busy, he had a prime target for taking advantage of in the wonderfully trusting and sweet Maxwell. I'm sorry! 
> 
> This chapter was written ages and ages ago before I got a chance to see Hamilton in London and before the news dropped that Disney Plus were getting it. I'm a musical theatre fan, though I know it's not for everyone, but I fed all that into this chapter and the next. Also spoilers, the chapter coming up is probably the favourite that I've written across all three fics (to be fair the third book is only 3 chapters long so far!) 
> 
> Thanks as ever for reading and the comments. They bring me so much joy, you have no idea.


	20. Wait For It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A night at the theatre in New York leaves Victoria and Liam wanting more of each others company. This is your warning for mild smut, yo.

_And if there’s a reason I’m by her side, when so many have tried, then I’m willing to wait for it._

The first act finished with a riotous song and was followed by even more riotous applause. Victoria turned to Liam with shining eyes. “What did you think so far?” She asked, suddenly feeling very nervous indeed. Liam’s face was just as bright as she felt.

“So far? It’s excellent.” He said smiling.

Victoria grinned in relief. “I’m so glad. I know musical theatre isn’t for everyone and I totally ignored the opera…”

“You don’t have to worry about that,” Liam said. He settled back against the plush chairs. It was intermission but they were in no hurry to leave. “There was a lot going on. And opera isn’t for everyone either.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want you to think that I’m not willing to have an open mind about stuff from your world.” Victoria countered. Liam gave her such a look that she shrugged. “What?”

“How on earth can you think that?” He asked, incredulous, but laughing. “Victoria, you travelled across the globe to learn about ‘my world’ and threw yourself in headfirst. You have an amazingly open mind. And I appreciate it.” His gaze moved from her eyes to roam her face and he reached out two fingers to stroke her hair back. “Amongst other things.”

Victoria smiled shyly at his touch. She was finding it hard to remember that he was a King and that she was still battling a sex scandal. She had half expected someone to turn around and point to him, recognising him as if he were an A-List celebrity, but it wasn’t the case. He just looked like a regular guy. A regular, extremely handsome guy. She grinned and told him as much, which made him laugh.

“I expect everyone looking at us just wonders what I did to deserve the beautiful woman on my arm,” Liam said. There was no trace of irony in his voice, that was the thing. He was speaking what he believed to be the absolute truth. Victoria smiled up at him and leaned in for another kiss. She couldn’t keep herself off him tonight. Liam didn’t seem to mind. It was a quick kiss and then Victoria dropped her head onto his chest, letting him wrap his arm around her shoulders. Everything felt easy.

Evidently, the same thoughts occupying Victoria's mind were also on Liams. “It’s so strange to be in a crowd. You’re never more surrounded or more alone.”

“True,” Victoria said. “Though in here we’re all strangers going through the same experience. It makes us all equals and friends in a sense, even though we don’t know anyone here.”

“I like the way you think.”

“I suppose it’s a new experience for you to be down with the mortals and not up in a box,” Victoria teased, twisting around to peer up at him without moving away from him. Liam laughed, the deep rumble of mirth resonating from his chest.

“You may have a point, my lady,” he admitted. “I’ve never gotten to sit down in the stalls before. Thank you for this experience.”

“You’re very welcome,” Victoria said. She wanted to kiss him again, so she did, pushing up and landed her lips onto his cheek, smelling his cologne, feeling the gentle stubble on his skin. Liam smiled and she felt the muscles moving under her mouth. She was so happy. So easily and blissfully happy.

Liam looked at her, a thoughtful expression playing on his brows. “I suppose… this might be the last time we are able to sneak away for a private excursion.”

Victoria frowned slightly. “What do you mean?”

“Tariq will be found in no time at all,” Liam said confidently. “I’m certain of this. Combining Bastien, Maxwell and, what was his name? Justin?”

“Justin, yeah.” Victoria nodded, still intrigued by Liam's line of thought.

“Well, once that happens the next days will be a whirlwind. And then you’ll be in the centre of the spotlight once again.” Liam said. “For good reason. And I… I hope you know that this time I will protect you with everything I have. If you still want that.”

His arm was still around her, and Victoria reached up with her hand to brush his cheek. “I believe you.” She said. “I guess…” She hesitated. “I guess the question on my mind is whether I can… I don’t know.” She remembered the way she’d explained it to Drake that morning and summoned those words again. “If you’d proposed to me at the end of the season I would have said yes. Immediately and without any doubts. I was head over heels in love and if nothing bad had happened afterwards it would have been fine. We’d have been engaged on this tour and I’m certain we would be loved up still and excited and I still wouldn’t have doubted a second of it. But… with everything else that’s happened, I feel like it’s brought me down to earth a bit.” Victoria straightened up in her seat so she could half turn to him as she spoke. His face was carefully neutral as he watched her speak. “It’s made me remember that I’m not a Disney princess who can marry a man she still barely knows.” She offered a small smile at her words and Liam looked down. “Drake and Maxwell are convinced I’m making a problem out of nothing, and maybe I am, but I’m trying to be realistic. We know each other in strange circumstances and haven’t really had time to truly get to know each other. We’re adults. I’ve never been in a relationship that lasted longer than six months and you and I have never actually reached that stage of dating.” Victoria broke off with a laugh as that thought struck her. “We were planning on going from nothing to engaged just like that.”

“I don’t… disagree with you.” Liam said hesitantly. “The system was not really built for dating as you know it. I had to be fair to all the ladies, even if I wanted to only spend time with you.”

“I know,” Victoria said. “I don’t hold that against you or the circumstances you had to make your decision in. It’s not your fault that it’s strange for me.”

Liam still wasn’t quite meeting her eye. Victoria glanced around. The chairs were filling up again. The second act would be starting soon and she felt like she’d walked them into a conversation full of pitfalls and traps. She felt like an idiot. She wanted that easiness back again, even if she felt this was important to discuss.

“Liam…”

“I understand.” he started at the same time. Victoria stopped and gestured for him to continue. “I do understand that you aren’t used to this and that from your perspective the whole thing must seem so strange. Even from my point of view, it’s a strange procedure. For what it’s worth,” and now he looked at her, finally locking eyes with her, blue to blue. “It’s something that I want to change for my descendants. Looking into the legalities of the engagement rules wasn’t just for us. It was to see if it could be changed for the future.” His eyes darkened as he looked through her, a different sight in his mind. “Nobody should have to go through what we did.”

Victoria grasped his hand tightly. “That won’t happen anyway. You won’t be like your father in that way.”

Liams sight snapped back to her again. “I appreciate the faith you have in me.”

“I do,” Victoria said seriously. “I have the utmost belief in your ability to be an excellent ruler and husband and father.”

A spark of interest lit in his face and Victoria looked away. She couldn’t seem to find a safe place to settle in this conversation. She wasn’t ready for _that_ discussion just yet. She was kind of glossing over the issue of children in her mind should she throw caution to the wind and marry him. One thing at a time.

The intermission was at an end and Victoria needed to pull this discussion back around quickly. She squeezed his hand and smiled at him. “Hey, this Act talks about legacy a lot.” She offered.

Liam smiled back and pulled her closer, kissing her atop her head. He seemed to grasp that she was hoping to move on from their talking. “I shall pay close attention then.” The lights dimmed again to applause and cheers.

Victoria patted her pocket. “Also, I have tissues for later. For no reason. At all. But let me know if you need one.”

The music started and the ensemble started to sing that it was 1789 as Aaron Burr started to rap about what was to come.

*

It was snowing again, just a gentle flurry, when the audience spilled into the night, high on having watched a great show. As part of the crowd, Liam and Victoria headed outside, relishing their invisibility. Victoria was still holding a tissue and her eyes were pink. Liam had shed a few tears himself, but not quite as much as Victoria. Still, they were both smiling as they started walking.

The snow was falling into their hair and Liam turned to look at Victoria as they walked arm in arm. She was laughing with smudged eye make-up and the odd sniffle. They were in the middle of the sidewalk with people around them, but Liam tugged her arm and she came with him as he ducked them out of the stream of people and into a recessed doorway to a closed store. Victoria's eyes were bright as Liam cupped her face in his hands, his eyes suddenly intense as he looked down at the woman he adored and then he bent to kiss her. She was light, she was life. He kissed her hungrily until they were both breathless. Victoria looked up at him and stroked her hand down his cheek, his gift glinting in the streetlight. He took her hand in his and pressed a kiss to her palm. “I love you.”

Victoria smiled. “I love you, too.”

Every time she spoke those words it was like a sip of water for a man lost in the desert. He would never get tired of hearing it. He took her hand and they headed back out into the street. Liam wasn’t quite ready for the hotel again. Madeleine had not been pleased to hear of his change of plans for that evening and he was sure she would have more to say, not least because he had walked away while she was mid-tirade. He just couldn’t summon the ability to be patient or kind with her anymore. It all seemed like wasted time when he could be with someone he actually loved and wanted to spend time with. His father was dying. His mother was long dead. Life was short, Liam knew this. You had to make time for the people who mattered.

With Victoria's hand in his, Liam directed them past the hotel and into Central Park. It was cold and the ground was slippery where the snow was replacing what had been cleared earlier, but he didn’t care. Victoria seemed fine with this detour.

The park was quiet apart from a group of teens throwing snowballs at each other. Victoria laughed to see them and then slipped her arm around Liam's waist so they walked closer together again. Liam followed suit with her.

“Central Park astonishes me every time I visit,” Liam said.

“Oh?” Victoria asked. “Why is that?”

Liam considered his words before he spoke. “There is something so… profound about this sliver of nature in the middle of the city. It’s a perfect rectangle, so it’s restrained in place by the city blocks. Despite the structure of Manhatten, which knows it’s purpose, it is unwilling to surrender this last piece of beauty and nature.”

Victoria smiled. “That’s beautiful. It kind of reminds me of you.”

“Me?” Liam asked, startled. “In what way?”

“Well, you are a man who knows his purpose.” She began slowly. “You grew up believing Leo would follow your fathers' footsteps and become king, but even then you were raised to understand the expectations of serving the crown. You know what you were placed on this earth to do and you do it really well.” She stopped under a tree and turned to him, taking both of his hands in hers. “I meant what I said before about your ability to reign. You are the best thing to happen to Cordonia. No offence meant to Leo, of course.” Liam smiled and nodded to show he understood. “You are committed in your sense of duty, and yet… you are still you. This piece of you, the real, true you… you don’t give that away. You keep it for yourself. As you should.”

Liam touched his forehead to hers. “Victoria, I don’t keep it for myself. I keep it for you.” She looked down, suddenly shy and Liam took her chin in his hand, gently tilting her face up to meet his eyes again. “My love, that part of me was buried so deep for so long I feared it was lost forever. I don’t think you truly appreciate quite how lost I was.” Her expression changed to a sombre one, her eyes crinkling with sympathy. “You are right in how you say I grew up. Leo was older and the heir, I was the spare, but I think even as boys we knew that if he could change that he would. I didn’t mind. I love my brother and only want what’s best for him. I’m so happy for him for having the courage to find his own path in life and I am happy with mine. But every time something happened, I shut a little part of me away. When my mother died… I closed one door. When we were attacked when I was eighteen, I shut another door up tight. After that, there were more smaller events that I shut pieces of me away. Every crown chaser I met before the season, every time I stumbled in my formal education. When Leo announced his abdication, I locked the final door. I distanced myself from my friends. I shut everything away. I think if it weren’t for you…” he traced cold fingers over her forehead and down around her cheek. “I would have lost myself irretrievably when my father told me he was sick and stepping down. But that didn’t happen. Instead, you’ve been picking the locks I thought were impenetrable. You’ve been springing them open and letting me out. I didn’t even know how deeply I was lost within myself until I met you. _You_ are the gift Cordonia needed, the gift I didn’t know I needed. I will never be able to thank you enough for what you have done for me. I hope to try.”

Victoria hadn’t looked away once as he spoke, her eyes trained on his, unwavering. “I don’t… trust people easily.” She started, her voice faltering. “Or ever. You know why that is. You don’t need to hear my sob story again. There’s a part of me that feels that when we found each other in here back in April that we were drawn to each other because of how sad we both were.” Here Victoria gave a wry smile. “Misery loves company, you know?” Liam smiled sadly at the thought. “But we didn’t drag each other down, we lifted each other up, right?” He nodded. “Everything you say I did for you… likewise. You taught me how to love and to trust and to… to jump over the edge of a waterfall, holding hands.” They both smiled now at the memory Victoria was citing. “But…”

Liam knew this was coming. He knew their story was magical only up to a point. Their story veered from fairytale to tragedy at his actions, unwillingly, but undoubtedly complicit in his fathers’ schemes. Each time he thought of that it was like taking another kick to the gut. But he wouldn’t begrudge Victoria from talking about it. It was the least he could do to listen.

“I _do_ trust you,” she said, searching for the right words. “And I believe I will always love you. But I am afraid of jumping again. I know there are no guarantees in a leap of faith—that’s precisely what makes it a leap of faith. I’m… I’m scared, Liam.” Victoria's eyes were big and full. Liam's heart was heavy as he looked down at her. He couldn’t give her what she wanted. He couldn’t give her an absolute guarantee; as she said that was not how faith worked. Nor could he insist she put her faith in him after he had broken her trust so badly. He was powerless.

With words failing him Liam just pulled Victoria to his chest and she let him. They stood under the tree as the snow fell a little harder and did what they always did: carved out a moment frozen in time to just be Liam and Victoria.

Eventually, the cold got to them and they made their way back to the hotel.

*

Even with the heavy topics they had skirted in the park, Victoria didn’t want to say goodbye just yet. At her door, she hesitated only a moment and then held the door open wider. Liam came inside without a moment’s thought.

“Sorry,” Victoria said. “I can’t quite say goodnight just yet.”

“I’m not complaining,” Liam said, pulling off his coat carefully to try to avoid it dripping onto the floor. The snow had grown fatter and faster on their way out of the park. It didn’t even matter that the Plaza was only a short walk; they had been utterly coated. Victoria took her coat off and thought for a moment. She held her hand out for Liam's coat and he handed it over, watching as she headed into the bathroom. He stood in the doorway as she draped the coats up over the bath so they could safely drip into the drain.

Victoria hung up her scarf as well and Liam stepped inside to copy her. After that came their boots. “Are your socks wet, too?” Victoria asked, feeling her toes squelch in the damp fabric. Liam chuckled by way of agreement and Victoria pulled hers off, laying them over the bath. Liam copied that, too.

It was fortunate that the bathrooms were so large, Victoria thought as they both removed their next layer. They’d been truly soaked by the snow and she was worried about her cardigan. Slipping it off to hang behind the door she heard Liam laugh again and she turned. “What?”

“I understand that reference now,” Liam said, nodding to the shirt she wore. Victoria grinned and looked down. The shirt was divided into three colour blocks, each bearing the face of 18th Century portraits along with the words “Angelica, Eliza and Peggy” over the top.

“It seemed appropriate.” She joked. Her hair was steadily allowing water drops to trickle coldly down her neck and onto the t-shirt. Her thighs were cold where the snow had pressed her jeans to her skin. She had a feeling that under her clothes she was as white as paper. Certainly, she felt just as fragile under the cold water. Her gaze travelled to the shower that stood in the corner of the bathroom. “How cold are you?” she asked suddenly. “I can’t have the King of Cordonia getting a chill because of me.”

Liam looked down at himself. “I suspect my attire was built more for this weather than yours.” His cords did look like they had fared better than her faded denim and his coat was long and warm. He’d been well protected from the snow. 

It was good that he wasn’t as cold as her, yet there was a part of her that felt disappointed. Two sides were at war within her. She needed a hot shower, that much was certain. But she didn’t want him to leave. And then there was the voice inside that probably wasn’t coming from her brain that wanted to invite him to join her. Her brain had a counter for that, yet more trust issues. He’d left her the last time they’d been intimate. The time before had been followed by her being humiliated at the ball. She wasn’t keen on repeating those feelings and so her brain argued that she should hold back from repeating history. He had to leave after this date, that much was true. He had to go back to his room and he would remain engaged to another woman. If she wanted him, she should wait to avoid feeling discarded. She should.

Victoria took a step closer to Liam who was watching her with a serious expression on his face. She had no idea what he was thinking. She licked her lips. “Liam… I need to take a shower.” she wasn’t touching him, her hand was out but there was a space between them. “I…”

Liam closed the gap and captured her mouth. She responded eagerly, the sensible part of her brain drowned out by the riot of feelings blasting through her at that moment. Her hands found his waist and tugged him closer. His were behind her head, tipping her back so he could kiss her deeply, urgently. “Liam…” his lips left hers and found her neck. She moaned. “Liam, wait…”

He looked up, his eyes dark, his skin flushed anew. “You left me,” Victoria said simply. “You left me alone in bed. I can’t… I don’t…”

“I’ll stay with you,” he said, burying his face in her neck again. “All night.”

“You can’t,” Victoria said. “You’ll be missed. And you’ll still have to leave in the morning.”

“I’ll tell Madeleine in the morning that I’m breaking our engagement,” he said. His teeth grazed her skin. “I’ve already told her I’m not leaving you here as she planned. You’re coming back home with me.”

Victoria squeezed her eyes shut, a tear dribbling out. It was so hard to think straight like this. “Liam.” Her fingers were in his hair, nails scratching along his scalp. He knelt and lifted her t-shirt to kiss the skin on her belly. “Liam!” she gasped as he nipped at her skin. Then he was gently tugging at the button on her jeans. It gave without any resistance, like a little traitor. Victoria reached one hand back and found the sink, bracing herself. Her other hand remained in his hair. The zip slid down like a sigh. Liam's lips were kissing her over her underwear and she almost fainted. Her breaths were shallow as he started to tug the denim down her legs. She’d expected resistance given how sodden the snow had made them, but these jeans were on Liam's side and took little persuading to slip off her legs. “Liam…”

He paused for a moment, fingers teasing along the elastic waistband. His face was mere inches from her and he slowly, painstakingly removed her briefs. She let him. He reached one hand to her ankle and slowly skimmed his hand up her leg to her knee, where he put on more pressure to lift her leg. She complied, the briefs slipping over her foot to lie on the bathroom floor. Apparently, she was not in full control of her body under the firm, but gentle handling of Liam. Her leg raised up and Liam rested it over his shoulder. Victoria gasped as he kissed her inner thigh, following a path along her leg. Then he was right between her legs, his breath warming her frozen, trembling skin, and Victoria bit down on her lower lip, stifling the noises threatening to deafen them both. His tongue traced patterns inside her and she gripped the porcelain sink tightly as her legs shook. One of his hands was on her leg over his shoulder, stroking her thigh. The other was at her opposite hip, helping to keep her grounded. He took his time, he adjusted according to her reactions. Victoria started to moan in earnest. “Oh… God… Liam!”

He groaned, the vibrations of the action adding to his tongue and Victoria momentarily blacked out, all consumed by the lightning bolts of pleasure shooting through her. She clutched at his hair and let out a small scream of pure joy.

When she could see straight again, Liam got to his feet. Victoria was trying to catch her breath, shaking against the sink and he drew her closer again, kissing her forehead. “I love you.” He murmured into her hair. “You take a shower. I’ll order some food. OK?”

Victoria just nodded, words failing her in the aftermath of her quaking orgasm. This was a scenario she had never imagined. An intimacy that lingered, no being left out in the cold. She nodded again as words were too tricky to form at that moment. Liam helped her out of her t-shirt and bra, then unclasped her bracelet, finding the box from her coat pocket and placing it back inside for safekeeping. Victoria stepped into the shower and Liam smiled as he ducked outside to call room service.

The shower was hot and fast and Victoria let herself disappear under its spray. The shower head was so big that standing beneath it was like standing beneath a hot, comforting raincloud. She didn’t want to wash away the day, the sensations, the feeling of Liam on her skin, but the water warmed her up as she had hoped. She thought of Liam outside in the bedroom calling for food and making himself at home. She liked the sound of that.

The door clicked and she wiped the condensation off the glass, to see that Liam was back in the bathroom. She smiled automatically to see him. He came to the shower and opened the door, stepping inside. She hadn’t even noticed that he was nude. He dropped a kiss on her shoulder, brushing his knuckles over her skin. The stream of water ran over his head, pouring over him onto her. She half expected to feel his arms around her, to be spun around and to pick up where they left off, but Liam didn’t seem to expect anything from her. He reached over and picked up the hotel shampoo, cracking off the top and rubbing it into her scalp. Victoria tilted her head back, letting his strong hands caress her and wash her hair. “Mmm”, Victoria murmured. Then she had a thought. “What about the food?”

“It won’t be here for half an hour,” Liam replied, methodically lathering her hair. “I told them to take their time with it.” Victoria relaxed against the feeling of his hands in her hair before washing it out. Liam picked up the shower gel and ran it over her skin, massaging her tired muscles as she worked the conditioner into her hair. They didn’t speak with words, but said plenty to each other in the silence, the communication of hands on skin and the way Liam tended to her body so calmly and gently.

When she was clean Liam turned the tap and the water vanished. He wrapped her in a towel and lead her out into the bathroom. She stood on the bathmat and leaned into him, so he could hold her, his hands rubbing her back through the material to dry her. “Hold on,” he said, then disappeared to the closet opposite the bathroom where a pair of white robes hung. He helped her into hers and slipped his own on then they headed for the bedroom.

Victoria didn’t know what to do next. This strange new place they were inhabiting was as unfamiliar to her as an alien planet would be. Not only with Liam, but with anyone. She thought about it, but could not remember a single person she had ever truly relaxed with like this. This quiet companionable time spent together in normalcy. What other people did in their private time. It would almost have been more familiar if he’d just taken her to bed. At least that she understood. This was a sneak peek into the world that could have been, that might still be if everything came together. Spending time just the two of them on simple terms. Going out for the evening, coming back together, unwinding together.

For now, though it baffled her. Liam headed into the room but Victoria felt her feet plant themselves just outside the bathroom. Liam stopped and looked back, offering a smile and a hand. “Come on.”

She took it and let herself be led to the suite. A bed. A pair of armchairs. A small love-seat. It was too much for one person, but apparently, this was the standard small room. Just one of the perks of travelling with the royal court. Liam hesitated now, turning to her. “Where would you like to sit?”

Victoria was paralysed with indecision. “I guess…” she started looking from each option to the next. Finally, she settled on the individual chairs. “There.” There was a table between them. Perfect for the food, which arrived right on cue. Liam let Victoria stay sitting and headed for the door. Victoria picked at the luxurious robe as Liam spoke with the server who delivered their food and left.

Liam was smiling when he sat back down. “What did you order?” Victoria asked shyly.

He lifted the dome over the plate to display something she recognised at once. Victoria laughed, the sound spilling over her lips before she fully realised what was so funny. “Burgers.”

“ _Deluxe_ burgers.” Liam countered, amused. Just like that, the spell was broken. Victoria felt her awkwardness melt away at the memory of their first night.

“It’s all coming full circle tonight.” She said, her mouth-watering as the smell of the food reached her. “These really are deluxe though. Is that Gruyère cheese? Oh wow!”

Liam set the dome down and picked up a small plate, turning away from her for a moment. When he turned back he had a small cake sitting on the plate in his hands. Victoria’s mouth opened in surprise as she took in the small lit candle standing in the middle of it, the flame flickering proudly. “Happy birthday, Victoria,” Liam said. Victoria met his eyes over the cake.

“Thank you,” she said quietly. “Truly. This is… honestly the best birthday I’ve ever, ever had. Maybe even the best day.”

“It’s my pleasure.” Liam murmured.

Victoria closed her eyes and made a wish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is Wait For It, as sung by Aaron Burr (sir) in the musical Hamilton. And it's perfect and beautiful and I had to borrow it for my couple.
> 
> I love this chapter. I never like my work; I always feel like I should be putting people off reading it, but this chapter of angst, fluff AND smut is just what I wanted it to be. As much as it's got sad moments as Victoria tells Liam how afraid she is of jumping with him again, I do love this little slice of happiness between them, and Liam really surprised me in her room! 
> 
> Next chapter kicks off the beginning of the end as well, so it's nice to have this pause before that!


	21. Invincible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria comes face to face with someone she never wanted to see again.

_We’ve got the right to be angry_

Liam straightened his cummerbund and smoothed down his shirt and thought about Victoria. He imagined what she might wear to match his midnight blue suit. She looked so beautiful wearing that shade. Liam sighed and reached for his cufflinks, sliding them through the holes in his cuffs and securing them in place. He was, to all intents and purposes, ready for this party, at least on the outside. His suit was pressed and perfect; his dressers never steered him wrong. They were experts in decorum and attire after all, and after thirty years of royal functions, he knew the pitfalls of clothing choices pretty well, too. His cologne was fresh and lightly applied. His hair was recently washed and styled, his blonde hair sweeping back in waves. So yes, he was ready and dressed and closely shaven. Inside he was a riot of nerves.

He thought about Victoria on a jet plane, flying away with Drake to the other side of the country. It might well have been the other side of the world. She was going to confront a man who’d caused her panic and fear and fright, not just on the night he assaulted her but every moment afterwards. It killed him that he couldn’t go with her. Liam knew she was strong -- that was never in doubt. Her bravery since he’d met her had astounded him and everything he knew about her past amazed him even more. She could do this, of that he had no doubt, but she shouldn’t have had to. None of this was something she should have had to do. Liam felt the incredible weight of responsibility press onto his shoulders as if someone was laying hands on him and pushing. It may have been his fathers' machinations that lead to this moment, but Liam felt very much at fault.

*

“How are you feeling, Quinn?” Drake asked as the plane crested over clouds and soared through the air. Victoria looked away from the window she had been staring out of and realised she had been biting her nails. She folded her hands into her lap instead.

“Good. Fine.” Victoria said. “Good.” She said again, trying to insert more meaning behind the word, seemingly only able to talk in monosyllables. Drake gazed at her with sympathy and she looked down in frustration. “I’m ready for this to be over.”

Drake nodded. “I figured.”

“I know seeing him again isn’t going to be easy,” Victoria added, haltingly. “After what happened with him and me… I don’t know how I’m going to feel or react.”

Drakes expression hardened. “Well, I know for a fact that I’m pissed at him and am so ready to give him a piece of my mind.”

Victoria looked across the aisle to her friend, raging on her behalf, his hands clenching into fists at the thought of it. It made her smile to see, even if she didn’t want any punches flying later on. She reached across and placed her hand over one of his fists and Drake looked up in surprise, the act draining the fire from his eyes. “Thank you, Drake. I’m glad you’re with me for this.”

Drake shrugged and gave her a wry grin. “I guess it made sense. I was there when it went down.” A shadow passed over his face and he cupped her hand in his. “I’m glad I got to come, too.”

Victoria nodded and sat back, lapsing into silence again. The plane was carrying Victoria and Drake across the United States as they travelled from the east coast to the west. It was a strange feeling, not least the travelling backwards by three hours. Maxwell and Justin had woken her that day with the news that they had figured out where Tariq was staying and managed to obtain a positive I.D. of him at his apartment through methods that Victoria wasn’t sure she wanted to know the details of. Suffice to say the men had looked very pleased with themselves. Not to mention with each other; when he had thought she wasn’t looking Victoria had caught Justin stroking the back of Maxwell's neck as the younger man shivered. Victoria wanted to be happy for her friend if he’d found a nice guy to spend his time with after all Maxwell had spent so much time and energy on her over the social season and the engagement tour. She couldn’t ever begrudge him his happiness. But something about watching the two of them made her uneasy. Justin was older and worldlier, which wasn’t in itself a bad thing, but somehow, she worried that Maxwell would fall hard and Justin might only be after a good time. Not to mention the fact that Maxwell and Bertrand were paying for Justin's services. That definitely felt awkward to Victoria.

She hadn’t said anything. She hadn’t known what words to use and she couldn’t really lecture anyone on their romantic choices.

The man _she_ loved had given her the most amazing birthday the previous day and she would treasure the memory of their time and her twenty-ninth birthday forever. However after the date and the show and the shower and the dinner… Liam had had to go. She’d known it was coming, but it was still a huge jolt to the gut as Liam had kissed her goodnight and left her room to head back to his. He was a man engaged to be married to someone else. Did it matter that there was no love shared between Liam and Madeleine? Victoria knew it didn’t; she had spent time with another woman's fiancé and that felt rotten underneath the love and romance. Like a perfectly red Cordonian Ruby which was full of worms inside.

That image brought a moue of distaste to Victoria's lips as her brain conjured up that sight and smell of rotting fruit. She shuddered and glanced out of the window again. She missed Liam. Desperately. Having spent so much time with him the day before was not a salve. Rather it served to make her miss his presence more acutely. Being with Liam begot wanting to be with Liam. She knew that if she had followed through on the orders to leave the country and months had passed without her being able to see or touch him she would be in a different position now. The ache would be there, but perhaps not as painful. Perhaps time and space would have healed her. Instead, she had tortured herself by spending time near him, now finally starting to spend time _with_ him again. It was a different kind of torture, it turned out, especially now that she was flying to L.A. without him. She was truly grateful for Drake, of course, she was, but she missed Liam.

She missed all her friends. Justin was the one who suggested they stay behind, though it had felt like more of an order. When Maxwell called them together to announce that Tariq was found and ready to be brought back, Liam had sprung into action, deciding that they could all head to L.A. at once to confront him. Justin had spoken up instead, reminding the group that there was an elegant party that night, hosted by American dignitaries that wouldn’t look kindly on the fact that their guest of honour would be absent. Liam had wanted to argue, but there was no sense in harming the US-Cordonian relations like that. Victoria would have been happy to just have the others, but Justin has asserted that they all needed to stay. The theme of the party had been hijacked by Madeleine for the cause of saying goodbye to Victoria and seeing her out of court life forever. Although Liam maintained he’d told Madeleine that he would not be leaving her behind, Justin made a case for him, Hana and Maxwell staying at the party for a heavy charm offensive. When the news broke that Liams and Madeleine's engagement was off and that Victoria's sex scandal was nothing more than a misunderstanding that would be blamed solely on Tariq— should he agree, Victoria fretted— Justin maintained that the press needed to be on Victoria's side. It needed to be seen as a great victory for love and honesty, not as a move to steal Liam and the crown from a worthy Countess. Victoria had baulked at being left to face Tariq alone, but fortunately, Drake had been deemed unimportant to the charm offensive. Later on, after Justin had gone to prepare, Olivia had laughed at that, remarking that ‘Drake’ and ‘charm’ didn’t exactly go hand in hand, but Drake had bitten back saying that she hadn’t even been called to the meeting so what good was she? Olivia might not have been included by Justin, but Victoria had been glad of her willingness to help. Perhaps she was more heavy-handed than whatever approach Justin wanted to take was, but she was a loyal and fierce advocate. Liam had been grateful of her agreeing to help; Victoria couldn’t help but wonder if Liam had spent much time with Olivia since the night of the Coronation Ball. Whether he truly appreciated the depths her love for him had run and if he understood what it meant to have Olivia fighting for them like this. Victoria knew of course and had thanked Olivia, but the Nevrakis duchess had ever-so-coolly waved it away. She might let her guard down in a one on one setting, but not in front of everyone else. Victoria got that and hadn’t pressed it.

She leaned back against the headrest and closed her eyes for the moment. Everyone but she and Drake were preparing for the party, for the press, for talking her up. She didn’t know how she would ever be able to thank them properly. The pilot of the jet announced they would be starting their descent and to buckle up, so she did. Victoria threw a shaky smile to Drake. She would figure out how to thank everyone once they pulled this off.

 _If_ they pulled this off.

*

The party was being held at the Plaza, which was very convenient indeed. Liam had to admit that that part of the plan had worked out well. Madeleine had spoken to him before the party to discuss their arrival and Liam had put the plan to distance himself from her into practice right then, announcing that they would be entering separately. For a moment she had said nothing, but when she realised that this was non-negotiable, she had closed her mouth tightly. Liam had felt a flare of victory at her accepting this without argument.

“His Royal Highness, King Liam Rys, of Cordonia” rang out as he made his entrance. The Americans had really gone to town for this event. It oddly served to make Liam feel more at home. His mind fled back to the Masquerade Ball. He remembered entering that ballroom with a feeling of resignation and dread. Today he felt anxiety, but determination.

He caught sight of Madeleine across the room. She was wearing the colours of Fydelia, green and black. She’d asked him to wear black today instead of the traditional blue and her eyes narrowed immediately as she took in the colour of his suit. Now they not only wouldn’t complement each other, but they would also clash.

Liam saw Olivia nod to him from where she stood, a striking figure in her scarlet gown. Hana was making polite small talk with some eligible noblemen, alongside ladies Penelope and Kiara. Liam caught her eye and she gave the merest wink whilst never changing her politely interested face. Liam hid a smile. Maxwell was with duchess Adelaide, handing her a drink and laughing along with her joke. He saw Liam and flashed a slightly panicked grin at him before Adelaide dragged him to the dance floor. Looking around Liam managed to find Victorias press secretary schmoozing the assorted journalists. Everyone was working for Victoria and that warmed Liam's heart.

The press caught sight of him and he brought a wide smile to his face as they approached with their tiny Dictaphones, pens and notepads. The first few questions were pretty basic, asking how he was and how he found New York and so forth. Liam nodded and smiled and kept everything very neutral.

“Your Highness,” began one after a few moments. “Countess Madeleine has spoken at length about this party being a send-off for Lady Victoria, but I don’t see her here tonight. Do you have any comment as to her whereabouts?”

Liam turned to the woman who was asking and just over her shoulder he saw Justin give a bare nod. It had seemed a very direct question, but now he realised that Justin had sown the seeds for them to ask him. He had better give a good answer.

“Lady Victoria is a busy woman.” he started smoothly, though the gears in his mind were whirring. “Countess Madeleine and I have found her to be invaluable over these past few months” — _no, don’t pair up with Madeleine for your answers_ — “and for myself, I must say that Lady Victoria has become a true friend. I wouldn’t be so quick to say your goodbyes to her just yet.”

“Lady Victoria isn’t staying in New York?” the woman asked, pouncing on the phrasing of his answer.

“I don’t believe she has plans to stay, no. Cordonia will always welcome her.” Liam nodded then turned to a Cordonian reporter he knew as the man asked another question.

“You say she’s your friend,” he asked, narrowing his eyes. “I find that hard to believe given how she betrayed you during the social season.”

Liam took a breath before replying, his veins shooting with hot anger at the thought of that night yet again. “I believe there is more to the story than you know. It's not even a matter of taking one side over the other; every story that ran after the photos emerged were pure speculation.” Liam paused for a moment, the act of holding back everything he wanted to say about the situation weighing on him. “Lady Victoria is a loyal, kind and warm woman, who is devoted to Cordonia. I count myself lucky to have met her and to continue to know her.”

The faces before him were a mixed bag, some sceptical, others looking more thoughtful. Liam turned to those who seemed to be considering his words. “Lady Victoria remains very popular in Cordonia, despite the negative press since the Coronation Ball. She made a great impression on the people she met throughout the season and many of them still speak very highly of her. As someone who was not native to Cordonia and not well versed in courtly life, Lady Victoria quickly learned everything she could about my country and our people. Not only does she now know them well, but she also loves them and wants to see Cordonia thrive. We should count ourselves lucky to have her.” Liam hesitated for a moment, his audience captive before him. Before he could continue there was a shout and a commotion and he turned to find the source. The press followed his gaze and they all looked over to where Lady Hana was standing. Lord Neville was before her, drenched in something. Wine; Liam noted that Hana was placing an empty glass on a tray being held by a shocked waiter who was trying to hide his amusement. Lord Neville was shouting, but Liam caught sight of Hana's face. She was glaring at him, her eyes burning with anger.

“Do excuse me,” Liam muttered as he broke away and headed for the scene. “Lady Hana, are you quite alright?”

Neville rounded on him, the red liquid staining his dress shirt. “Her? Your Highness, it is I who have been victimised!”

Liam glanced at him then turned back to Hana, his eyes searching her face. She didn’t take her gaze from Neville, her hands were clenched into small fists at her side. Everything about Hana seemed so delicate like a sugar flower or a defenceless kitten, but Liam had no doubt at that moment that she would be a force to be reckoned with. Hana spoke to Liam while still glaring at Neville. “It’s him, Liam. He’s the one who’s been harassing Victoria.”

Liam turned, nostrils flaring, eyes narrowing. His arm shot out, it happened fast and yet in that split second, his mind flashed through the memory of Victoria at Applewood after “someone” had come to her door after a rendezvous, how she told him that certain nobles had pegged her for an easy lay while they courted their future wives. Her tears and her tone when she talked about herself being worth so little reverberated within his skull. He wanted to slam his fist into Nevilles sneering face, but Victoria was confronting Tariq that night, on the cusp of clearing her name, the name sullied by his fathers' actions. Liam clamped his hand onto Neville's shoulder instead. He tugged him closer and bent down, a low word in his ear, nothing for the press to worry about. They couldn’t see that he dug his fingers into Neville's shoulder just a touch too deeply, making him wince. “Lord Neville Vancoeur, is this true?” Neville turned his head slightly to take in the sight of his furious monarch and opened his mouth. “Never mind,” Liam said. “I don’t need to hear it. Lady Victoria never mentioned your name to me; she gave you every chance to check your behaviour.”

“He was telling me how much better I was without Victoria,” Hana growled quietly. “That I would make a great bride and Victoria would only ever make a good…” Hana blushed at this, her righteous anger faltering as she struggled to find the words. That Hana couldn’t bring herself to quote Neville directly told Liam what he needed to know. Beside her ladies Kiara and Penelope were huddled, watching with wide eyes. Kiara’s face turned dark as she realised that this was not a one-off remark, and she stepped slightly closer to Hana, adding the weight of her gaze aimed at Neville.

“Lord Neville, used some rather uncouth words, Your Highness.” She said to Liam in a steady voice. “I was quite shocked.”

Liam nodded to Kiara and Hana and then turned back to Neville and pressed even closer, lowering his voice to the quietest, softest threat. “Neville, you need to leave now. Go home to your estate and think about your actions. Think about how much you have lost tonight with your words. Think about the fact that the ladies will discuss this. Think about how much harder you are making it on yourself to find a bride. But mostly,” Liam leaned down and spoke right into Neville's ear, “Think about the fact that I will make your life hell if you ever speak to Victoria again.” He gave his shoulder one more squeeze and straightened with a smile. The press was watching after all. “Lord Neville has had a touch too much to drink!” he announced with a laugh and the people watching all added their laughter. “Would someone be so kind as to return him to his room to sleep it off?”

Bastien was there in an instant, ever-present, but allowing his King to handle this on his own. “My pleasure, Your Highness,” he said and nodded to Neville. “Come now, Lord Neville. Off to bed for you.”

Olivia and Maxwell had joined the group; Maxwell was on his phone tapping away. “Nicely handled,” Olivia said approvingly. Liam smiled, but Olivia chuckled. “Not just you, Liam, but Hana… I’m impressed.”

Hana shrugged, her hands relaxing now and the anger leaving her face, returning her to her usual pleasant demeanour. “Oh, it was nothing. And it was probably the wrong thing to do. I bet it wasn’t what Justin wanted from tonight.”

“Actually, it was fine,” came a voice behind Liam. Justin was nodding considerately to Hana. “Getting rid of one of the worst naysayers for Victoria was a quality move. Nice work. But don’t all clump here, get mingling and spreading the good word!”

“Maxwell, what are you doing?” Olivia asked, ignoring Justin.

“Texting Drake,” he said without looking up from his phone. “I bet they’ll get a kick out of this.”

“Hana, that was very brave of you,” Penelope spoke up suddenly, shrinking away as everyone turned to her. “I wish I could have been as quick thinking like you.” Her gaze angled downward.

Liam remembered hearing that Penelope had worked with Bastien to orchestrate Tariq going to Victoria's room. He was torn; Penelope looked crestfallen, but she had helped to hurt his love.

Hana reached for Penelope and placed a comforting hand on her arm. “You were when it counted. Victoria understands and she forgave you.”

Kiara looked back and forth from Penelope to Hana. “I have missed something…” she said slowly.

Hana smiled at both. “Why don’t we catch up, ladies, and then perhaps you can help us tonight.” Olivia smiled as she caught Hanas drift.

“An excellent idea.” Olivia nodded. “Who better than to sing Victoria's praises than Madeleines ladies-in-waiting.” Her eyes sparkled with a glint of mischief. Kiara looked even more confused, but Penelope surprised Liam by gaining a focused look of determination.

“I want to help.” She said. The ladies moved off to speak candidly and Liam was left with Maxwell. He looked at the younger man on his phone and cleared his throat.

“Have you heard anything from them?” he asked, the slight quaver in his voice betraying his calm appearance.

“They touched down in L.A. airport a little while ago,” Maxwell said looking up. “They’ll let us know when they have him.”

Liam nodded. Maxwell offered a confident grin. “They’ll call me soon, I’m certain.”

*

Victoria’s teeth were clenched as they exited the elevator and headed down the hallway to number 28. Her heart was racing, but her footsteps felt very slow, creating a jarring dichotomy. Drake walked at her side as close as her shadow. He knew better than to ask how she was. She didn’t even know how she felt.

The door loomed up before them, looking like a normal door, which was a lie as it was the door that stood between her and the man who’d helped to ruin her reputation. It ought to have been painted red and covered in warning signs. She knocked before she could think better of it.

Sound from inside the apartment made her insides turn to water. She swallowed. Her mouth was so dry. The door opened.

“Hel—?” Tariqs face loomed into view and his voice cut off with a strangled noise as he recognised her. “Lady Victoria!”

Victoria stood rooted to the floor. Her breath hitched. She looked into his shocked face and suddenly she was back at Applewood, in the dark, half nude, his hands on her body. That lurch of terror and humiliation shot through her and before she could think better of it her hand flew at his face and a resounding slap echoed down the halls.

She’d never slapped anyone in her life. It felt oddly satisfying and the noise and connection broke her mind of the loop it was locked in.

Drake whistled beside her. “Nice hit.” He said. Tariq glared at him as he rubbed his cheek where a red mark was burning. Drake stepped around Victoria. “I’m sorry, did you want to say something?”

Tariq deflated. Drake turned back to Victoria. “You ok?”

“Yes.” She croaked out. “I’m fine. Sorry.”

Both men looked surprised at her apology to Tariq. “Don’t be sorry,” Drake said. “ _He’s_ the one who should be sorry.”

“I… that’s right.” Tariq said quietly. “Please, both of you, come inside.”

Victoria followed him into the loft apartment. It was modern and sleek, but every available surface was covered in bags and boxes from stores. A pile of wool coats covered the sofa. The kitchen counter was stacked with smaller boxes of jewellery, wallets and scarves.

“Wow,” Victoria said flatly. “You’ve been busy.”

Tariq nodded, abashed. “I have been keeping myself occupied. Trying to forget what happened and what I did.”

“Oh, has it been _difficult_ for you?” Drake asked, his voice dripping with disdain. “You poor baby. You’ve had to hide out here and drop a small countries economy on eight, ten, a dozen coats in basically the same colour?”

“Those are all different colours—” Tariq started but Drake cut him off.

“You piece of shit,” the words burst out of Drake, like something snapping inside him, breaking whatever chain he held himself back with. He marched across the room and grabbed Tariq’s lapels, thrusting him against the wall. “I should have done a better job kicking your ass back in Cordonia, then you wouldn’t have been able to run. I should have broken your fucking spine in half if you had one. ”

“Please—” Tariq started, his eyes wide and scared, his words garbled. “Let me speak—”

“You had so many chances to speak,” Drake yelled. “You said _nothing_!”

Victoria strode up to Drake and tugged his arm, feeling the muscles tense under her palm. “Drake, come on.” She said softly. “This is why we’re here. Let go of him so we can talk.” Drake looked away from Tariq, but couldn’t quite meet her eyes. She could see the struggle behind his expression as he remembered finding her at Applewood. “You did plenty for me that night.” She said, squeezing gently on his arm. Finally, Drake let go of Tariq and pulled back, slipping out of her grasp.

“Not enough,” he muttered, heading across the room to stand by the kitchenette. Victoria watched him go with sorrow in her gaze. It was all so damn messed up. She turned back to Tariq. One person at a time.

“Tariq, I’m after some answers,” Victoria explained, keeping a fair distance between her and the man who was straightening his clothing where Drake had mussed it. Glancing at his hands as they worked on his shirt caused a swell of revulsion to rise in her, and she had to look away.

“I understand,” Tariq said quietly. “But please, let me first apologise. Lady Victoria I am so very sorry for what I put you through. The memory of that night has haunted all my nights since. I am deeply ashamed of my actions; whatever the confusion was over the rooms, I should never have assumed… should never have done anything without…” Tariq sighed and clasped his hands before him, looking up into her face with sincere eyes. “I did a terrible thing. I will never forgive myself for hurting you and for enabling the press to run with that story for so long. I am so, so sorry.”

Victoria looked up at him, forcing herself to take in his face. “Thank you, Tariq.” She said. “I’m glad you’ve taken this time to reflect on your choices and I hope you remember this in the future. I’m… it hurt me very badly. I can’t lie about that to protect your feelings. I could have lived with that night if it had remained between the three of us, but when it went viral… it hurt me even more. I know that wasn’t your fault; you didn’t orchestrate an audience. But when the news broke you didn’t come forward. You could have stopped the news before it got so big and ruinous and you didn’t.”

“I know.” Tariq nodded. “I am a coward, through and through, just as Drake says. I had hoped that by staying away I would spare you further harm after that night, but I know that’s not the whole story. I was afraid of what it would mean for me. That the world would know what I did and judge me for it.”

“So you let them judge Quinn instead,” Drake growled from across the room. Tariq just nodded sadly.

“I did.” He agreed. “I’m sorry.”

Victoria felt it was a little easier to breathe now, hearing that Tariq was sorry and had taken ownership of his mistakes. But there was one more thing she needed to loosen that vice on her lungs completely. “Tariq, I accept your apology. You made a choice for both of us when you assaulted me and then again when you stayed silent. I had no say in either matter; you took away my agency. That needs to change. I need you to be brave and stand up for me.” Tariq's eyes closed instinctively and he turned his head away. “I know it won’t be easy,” Victoria said, a part of her hating herself for being so considerate of his feelings, but she had to get him on side. “If you make a statement to the press about what really happened that night… you won’t make it go away, but you can help fix what you broke.”

“I…” Tariq drew a shuddering breath and opened his eyes. “I want to help, but perhaps that might not be the best path forward…?”

“Really?” Drake asked, coming up behind Victoria. “You’re gonna question Quinns judgement on this? After all that?”

Tariq hesitated and nodded. “You’re right. Of course. I’ll help you.”

Victoria let out a breath and reached behind her, grasping Drakes hand tightly. She needed to ground herself at that moment, realise it wasn’t a dream, it was what was actually happening. She felt as though she were suddenly filled with light and air and that she might even start to float out of her own body if she weren't anchoring herself to Drake.

Tariq was going to come clean. They’d done it.

“Thank you.” She said. And then: “we need to leave right now.”

“What?” Tariq said in surprise. “Where are we going?”

“Back to Cordonia,” Victoria said, pulling out her phone. “Pack a bag. We’re going home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter took a long time to pick. In the end, I went with one of my favourite songs by Pat Benatar, Invincible. Victoria is invincible at this moment, standing up to what happened to her.
> 
> Ok, first sorry for not posting yesterday. I genuinely forgot it was a Monday thing I do! 2 out of my 3 children are back at school and so that preoccupied me a little bit! Excuses, excuses! 
> 
> This was a tough chapter to write, purely because I wanted to get it right. I know that most of the gang go with Victoria, but I wanted to keep it between the people who were in the room at Applewood to bookend the event. And Justin has a plan for the evening and needs feet on the ground for it, though he's still avoiding Olivia. Sneaky press secretary!


	22. Burned Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back to Cordonia.

_Dreams and ideas should not be the same thing_

Despite the turmoil he felt, Liam was grateful to be back on Cordonian soil. It felt like he had been away from his homeland for years instead of weeks. It was the middle of December and the air was so crisp that every breath felt like frost was blossoming inside his lungs. He was glad to be home. All that was missing was Victoria.

Drake had sent him a text to say they had landed, which Liam had received while still in the air, his plane coming in later than theirs. Now he was back at the palace with a very important job to do. Tariq was found and he had agreed to give a televised statement to the press, clearing up the scandal surrounding Victoria and clearing her of any wrongdoing. It was about time and it was an immense relief. Liam needed to tackle his own baggage now; there was no longer any reason to pretend with Madeleine and continue the charade of their engagement. He had planned to get it over and done with back in New York, only to find that Madeleine had caught an earlier flight back to Cordonia. If he didn’t know any better, he would have guessed she was avoiding him.

Liam had been swept up into work as soon as he’d returned to the palace and now, finally, he started for Madeleine. He checked her sleeping quarters to find them empty. He tracked down her secretary who hadn’t seen her in an hour or so. He wandered the length of the palace, searching for his fiancée to no avail until he came to the ballroom. He hadn’t thought to check there because they didn’t have any plans; he’d advised the staff that there would be no need for the wedding shower… except that the message didn’t seem to have gotten very far. He stepped into the vast room, bedecked in the silver and green that Madeleine had selected for their wedding colours and his heart sank.

“Madeleine.” His voice rang out through the room to the blonde woman who turned with one arched brow. “What are you doing?”

Madeleine dismissed the trio of staff with her without pausing from her task; adjusting a vase of lilies in the centre of a table. She took her time tweaking the arrangement just so before she steadily walked up to Liam, the sound of her silver heels on the polished floor reverberating through his head. “Oh Liam, doesn’t the room look just fine?”

A door clicked heavily shut and the footsteps of the staff faded away. Liam gritted his teeth. “Madeleine, I asked the staff to cancel the shower.”

Madeline gave no sign that this was a surprise to her, nor that she was bothered. “I know, there wasn’t much time. But I already had my staff working with my plans and I made it back in time to perfect the final adjustments, so no need to worry about a thing, darling.” She reached her hand up towards his face and Liam recoiled, a muscle working overtime in his jaw. Despite the fact that they were alone in the room, Madeleine's eyes narrowed and she looked around lest anyone should see.

“Liam.” She said curtly, pulling her hand back. “I’ve gone to an awful amount of trouble with this shower. The least you could do is be grateful.”

“Grateful?” Liam asked incredulously. “You’re joking?”

“No, actually,” Madeleine said, her voice winding tighter with each syllable. “Do you know how difficult it’s been to plan a shower and a wedding whilst travelling throughout the best part of Europe?”

“Yes,” Liam said, taking a step away from her. Her fingers might not have been reaching for him, but he didn’t feel comfortable giving her the option to touch him with ease. “You’ve said how hard it’s all been on you.”

Madeleine straightened her back. “I’m glad you recall. But that is why you chose me, is it not? You knew that I would be up for the task.” She opened her arms, gesturing to the space around them. “And look at what I have accomplished! After this, you can trust me to tackle any situation head-on and succeed with little to no trouble.” Liam looked back at her with a blank face. He couldn’t quite believe how proud she was of a stupid event. He thought of Victoria facing the man who had assaulted her and almost laughed. The two women weren’t comparable and for Madeleine to be so boastful about something he cared so little about, something that seemed so banal, when Victoria had overcome so much trauma, so many hideous situations in her life made Liam's hackles rise.

Madeleine seemed to be considering something and apparently came to a decision. She licked her lips and swallowed, taking a bold step towards Liam. She looked up at him and stretched her hand forward to press her fingers to his chest. Her voice was a low murmur when she spoke. “And just think… all of my skills could be put to good use elsewhere.”

Liam was too shocked to move at first. He looked down at her face, where her eyes couldn’t quite meet his. Her tone was a good attempt at sultry, but it was a little off. Like a teenager testing the waters, mimicking something she’d seen women do in the movies to seduce men. Like she was acting, but deep down she was terrified. That more than anything reviled him and he brushed her hand away, too bothered by the show she was trying to put on to spare her feelings. “Don’t touch me,” he snapped. “Honestly, what’s gotten into you? I much preferred it when you were honest about not wanting to get anywhere near me.”

Madeleine steeled herself, though her lower lip was trembling just the slightest amount. “We’ll be married in a few days.” She said, her voice clipped, but Liam had seen beneath that façade now. “We’ll have to get used to it.”

Liam shook his head. “You’re crazy.” He said, realising he wasn’t being delicate or kind, even though he could see that he had found an exposed nerve here. Finally, a chink in her imperious armour. He dove for it with cruelty. He wasn’t here for mercy. He was out for blood. “You really think it’s that simple? To be with someone who disgusts you? You think I can just forget about… you think I could ever bring myself to kiss you let alone anything else?”

Madeleines eyes hardened. Chips of green glass bore into him. “I don’t care what you do, Liam.” His name dripped from her mouth like acid. “For all, I care you can close your eyes, grit your teeth and think of Victoria if it helps, but one way or another we’re going to have to start a family and once that happens, you’ll forget all about her.”

Liam took a shaky breath. He wanted to retch; it felt like bile was rising in his throat to listen to her. For a moment the world spun until he remembered what he had to tell her. “Madeleine, enough.” He had to rein in his bloodlust. He lifted a hand, palm down, a symbol of a truce. “We can’t get married. You’re still formally engaged to my brother. The contract was never annulled after he abdicated. It’s not legally possible for us to marry.”

Madeleine was so still for a moment that he was half afraid that she had turned to ice and would shatter if she tried to move. Then her features morphed from shock to anger, eventually landing, to his astonishment, on dismay. “No…” she uttered, barely moving her lips. “No.” she repeated, her voice gaining strength. “I can’t believe this.” Her eyes slid away from his face, losing their edge. She stumbled backwards and clutched a chair, slipping onto it, holding the back as if her life depended on it. Liam stood unmoving, watching. Madeleines hand found her mouth and she pressed her fingers to it as she shook her head slowly back and forth, eyes unfocused. “Are you sure?”

Liam took a breath. He had expected a fight, not this. “I’m afraid so.” He said though he was sure she knew he didn’t feel sorry at all. “I’ve had people look into it and they double, triple checked. Your engagement with Leo would have to be dissolved before you could enter into an engagement with me. That’s… that’s really all there is to it.”

Madeleine was still staring off into somewhere in her minds eye. Her hand had sunk down to her throat as she stared. Suddenly she snapped back together as if she’d never had a moment of breaking down. “How long will that take to rectify?”

Liam flinched instinctively. Her recovery was so fast it made his head spin. “Er…” He hadn’t exactly looked into that aspect, given that he wasn’t looking to remain engaged to the woman. “I’m not sure.” He said truthfully. “We need to get the legal team on the case first thing tomorrow.” He said, thinking of voiding his engagement with her as soon as he could. “That’s why we need to cancel the shower. It wouldn’t be right to carry this along with the legal ramifications hanging over us.” Amongst other reasons.

Madeleine stood jerkily, facing up to him. “People will be arriving soon.” She said. “It’s too late to cancel at this point. And we’re still engaged to all intents and purposes right now, so let’s take tonight and then we can fix this mistake tomorrow morning.”

Liam shook his head. “No, you don’t understand… we aren’t engaged. It’s not possible.”

Madeleine threw him a withering look. “In the eyes of the press and in the eyes of Cordonia, we _are_ engaged. Nobody knows about this clerical error beside us and no-one needs to know. We’ll fix this. If we have to postpone the wedding, that would be embarrassing, but we could manage that, but the shower is tonight.” She lifted one slender wrist and glanced at her watch with a moan. “In less than two hours. No, we can’t stop that.”

Liam started to protest, but Madeleine brushed past him. “I need to go and get changed. Please don’t do or say anything to humiliate me tonight. Please.” She couldn’t meet his eye, but Liam could see the tension in every line of her face.

"Fine." He snapped. "You can have this night." Once Tariqs statement was out things would change. He could give Madeleine this last hurrah if it kept her from making things hard for Victoria. They were so close.

As Madeleine left, Liam pulled out his phone and typed a message to Drake.

*

Drake glared down at the message on his cell phone screen. There was nowhere for the irritation to go, the feelings that had burst inside him when he read that Madeleine was still calling the shots. He hastily typed a curt reply to Liam and shoved his phone away. He supposed it wasn’t really Liams fault. Madeleine was a master manipulator. Drake reckoned that had to be the reasons she had managed to weasel two engagements out of men that he assumed would ordinarily be too savvy to fall for the tricks of that woman. Ok, so Liam had been forced into a corner and had had to make a snap decision, but Leo had had more time and still landed on Madeleine. She was a witch. That had to be it, Drake decided.

As he walked his bad attitude back into the room he almost collided with Maxwell. Drake bit back the retort he had planned as he was trying to find it in his stone-cold heart to make peace with the younger Beaumont. He formed his face into a sallow smile, but froze when he saw the look on Maxwell's face. “What’s up?”

Maxwell wasn’t quite wringing his hands, but somehow his entire demeanour suggested that he was doing that in his head. “The statements been recorded, but I don’t think Justin is happy with any of us.”

“Oh?” Drake asked, not sure he cared about the feelings of the press secretary. “What’s getting his back up?”

“I think he expected at least one of us to side with him earlier,” Maxwell said, his brown eyes anxious. “When we all agreed with Victoria to hold off releasing the footage until we knew Liam had talked to Madeleine.” Maxwell sighed. “I think he wanted me to be on his side.”

“That’s stupid,” Drake snorted. “As if you’d ever be on the side of a plan that would hurt anyone’s feelings. That’s if Madeleine even has feelings.” Drake held up his phone. “I got an update from Liam; he told her about their engagement being obsolete and she refused to even consider stopping the shower tonight.”

“What?” Maxwell’s mouth gaped. “I felt sure she’d be too awkward to carry it on after that.”

“Like I said, not sure she has feelings,” Drake said, sliding his phone back into his pocket. “Where’s Quinn? She needs to know what's going on at the palace.”

“She was with Hana,” Maxwell said, turning to look back. In the room beside them were a film crew and the assembled press, reeling from the exclusive statement delivered only a few moments before by Tariq. Drake caught sight of Hana who was coming back into the room.

“Hana!” he called and she hurried over to them. “Where’s Quinn?”

“She wanted to head back to the palace,” Hana explained. “Bertrand went with her.”

Drake sighed, he wanted to pass on the news to her before she’d left. He pulled out his phone again and turned away, unlocking the screen. As he scrolled through his contacts he heard Justin re-enter the room impressing upon someone how important it was to get this statement out as soon as possible. Drake pulled up Quinns number and was about to type a message when he heard an officious voice retort to Justin that this was Victoria's decision. Drake whirled. “Bertrand? You’re supposed to be with Quinn.”

“I am?” Bertrand asked, confused. “Where is she?”

“She’s not with you?” Maxwell asked looking around as though she might pop up from behind someone at any moment.

“Obviously not, Maxwell,” Bertrand said with an edge to his patience.

“She said she was going back to the palace,” Hana explained. “She said you were calling her a car.”

“I did that,” Justin said, raising his hand. “I thought it was about time the two love birds were reunited. I guess I’m a romantic at heart.” Maxwell threw him a pained look as he said this and Drake resisted a monumental eye-roll.

“Ok, so Quinn went back by herself?” Drake clarified to everyone’s nods. “Trouble is that Madeleine is pushing ahead with the shower. Quinns going to walk into that charade as soon as she gets back.”

“Ah,” Justin said, his eyes focused, the gears in his calculating brain working overtime. Drake sighed and moved away again, dialling Victoria instead of messaging. The phone rang and rang and rang. “Damn it.” Her voicemail invited him to leave a message. “Quinn, listen, Liams told Madeleine about their engagement and she’s insisting they do the shower anyway, so just… this is a heads up. Don’t walk in unprepared. Why the hell didn’t you wait for us? Anyway. Watch your back.”

He ended the call with a grumble and found Liam's number instead.

Justin was talking again as the phone started to ring. “This could be really good.” He was saying. “If we release the statement and time it right, can you imagine the entrance for Victoria? The vindicated heroine returns to the palace just as the truth rings out. You couldn’t ask for better.” 

“I suppose that makes sense,” Maxwell put forth weakly.

That was all it took for Justin; he locked eyes briefly with Drake as he lifted his phone. "This is going to be perfect."

“No,” Drake growled as Liam answered, “hang on just a second Liam,” he pulled the mouthpiece away from his face for a moment. “Quinn wants to wait, so we’re doing what Quinn wants. Liam? Yeah, the statement is in the bag, and Quinn wants to wait but her puppet master has other ideas.” Drake listened for a moment. “Liam says to wait, too. And he’s the king, so.” Justin's face clouded as he took in Drakes words but he kept his mouth shut and shoved his phone away. Maxwell edged closer to him and tried to catch his eye, but Justin turned away. “Listen, Liam, Quinn left without the rest of us to come and find you, I guess. I’ve tried calling but… yeah, if you could head her off before she walks into the party? Ok, we’ll head back now.”

He rang off and looked around. “Right, let’s go and back up Quinn.”

*

“Bastien, any sign?” Liam asked. The head of the royal guard shook his head and Liam frowned. The party had begun and still, he had not found Victoria. Bastian had promised to make her his top priority and had his guards keeping eyes out for her, but she had yet to make an appearance. It was making him antsy. He just wanted to see her again, make sure she was alright after confronting Tariq.

“Your Majesty,” Liam turned and smiled politely as his attention was drawn away from watching the doors. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Bastien nod and return back outside the ballroom.

After making small talk with various dignitaries, Liam felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned, with hope, but was surprised to see Constantine's face. “Ah, hello, father.” He greeted him wanly.

Constantine and Regina had not been present in New York, which had been quite a relief after everything that had been said in that English hospital. Liam felt the now familiar sucker punch as he looked at his father and remembered that this man had been the source of the betrayal against Victoria. It hurt, _God_ , it _hurt_. But Liam arranged his features into a placid expression.

“Hello Liam,” Constantine said quietly. It was just the two of them for the moment, but the King Father kept his voice low. “I’m surprised to see this shower going ahead.”

Liam’s brows quirked. “Why? What do you…did you hear?”

“That Tariq had been found?” Constantine said. “Yes, I heard.”

“Of course, you did,” Liam said with a sigh. “You don’t miss anything.”

Constantine smiled thinly. “Are you and Madeleine still…?”

“No,” Liam said firmly. “I have spoken to her and although she doesn’t yet know about details, she knows I don’t intend to…” he trailed off. They both knew what they were talking about, there was no need to say it out loud. Even with the courtiers giving them a respectfully wide berth, it wouldn’t do to let this out yet. “This is a final kindness.”

Constantine looked sceptical. “She’s a clever woman.” Liam gritted his teeth. “The longer she can draw it out the less chance of losing everything.”

“Thank you, father,” Liam snapped. “I didn’t ask for your council. Excuse me.” He nodded curtly and moved around the man he had idolised for so long and left him standing alone.

*

Drake caught Liam's eye the moment he, Maxwell, Hana and Bertrand entered the ballroom and the King made a beeline for them. Drake looked around at the dressings on the tables and walls and grimaced. “God, it looks like Slytherin won the House Cup.” Hana cast him a look and he shrugged. “What? Didn’t you read Harry Potter when you were a kid?”

“ _You_ didn’t.” Maxwell teased. “You read them last year, don’t pretend.”

Drake bit back his retort as Liam came up to them. “Where’s Quinn?”

Liam glanced over all of their faces. “I haven’t seen her.”

“How is that possible?” Bertrand frowned. “She must have arrived before we did.”

“She didn’t get back to me after I left her a voicemail,” Drake added dourly.

“And I’ve been texting her the whole time,” Maxwell said, whilst typing. “There. Sent another one.”

“You don’t think something happened to her en route?” Hana asked, looking to Liam. “Or…”

“Or maybe she didn’t come here in the first place.” Drake finished grimly. “Maybe she went somewhere else.”

Liam sighed and brushed his hands over his head. “I don’t know.”

They stood quietly for a moment until Bertrand clapped his hands together briskly. “Well, it doesn’t do for us to stand here in a clump. Let’s get out and mingle and keep an eye out for her. If anyone hears anything we’ll alert you at once, Liam.”

“Thank you,” Liam said, but his heart was sinking. Was Victoria alright? As they started to move away Hana stopped him.

“Liam, where’s Madeleine?”

Liam looked up at her words and scanned the room. She was nowhere to be seen and at that moment he realised he hadn’t seen her for some time.

“I don’t know.” He said flatly.

*

The pair of footsteps were so different in every way. The sharp heels clacked assertively on the stone floor and rang out, echoing off the walls. The pair in worn Vans padded softly along, just about keeping up with the forceful stride of the pumps. Eventually, they reached a room and slipped inside.

Madeleine flicked on a light switch and illuminated that they were in a private study. Books lined the walls, with a heavy desk to one side. The back wall behind the desk was mounted with weapons. Victoria swallowed as she took in the sharp sword and shield that Madeleine had to her back. How quickly could she grab those and did she know how to fight? Madeleine crossed her arms and drummed pointed silver nails along her arm. Oh yeah, she knew how to fight, Victoria would have put money on that. Her mother's voice rose up, but Victoria pushed her away. _Not now_. 

“Well then, you have my attention,” Madeleine said. “What is this all about?”

Victoria took a deep breath and pulled out her phone. “I have some news… you aren’t going to like it.” She sighed, hesitating. “Madeleine, I’m really sorry about this. You said once that it might seem as though you hated me and maybe it seems like I hate you, but I don’t. I think it’s damn near impossible to get along with people when you’re pitted against them in some archaic and patriarchal competition so it makes sense that we didn’t exactly gel.”

Madeleine huffed and rolled her eyes. “Get to the point.”

Victoria cocked her head to one side. “Ok, you know what? You were unkind to me when you didn’t have to be. I’m not a horrible person, I just happened to be in your way and you didn’t have to kick me when I was down. I’m grateful you stood up for me to the press that time, but you didn’t have to make me get your wedding ring.”

“Oh, good lord, Victoria,” Madeleine burst out. “Will you please hurry up and make whatever statement you dragged me away for. I am missing my wedding shower for this asinine chatter.”

Victoria opened up her emails and tapped the screen, turning it to display to Madeleine. “Just this.”

With the phone turned away from her, Victoria could only hear the voice of Tariq as he stood and made his statement to the press. Hearing him admit to the mistake that had occurred, how he was entirely to blame, how he apologised for the trouble that had followed Victoria since the pictures were leaked was no less complicated than hearing it live. The feelings of relief sat alongside feelings of discomfort that came from hearing that night at Applewood being discussed again. Victoria raised her eyes to watch Madeleine's face, lit up by the screen. Her pinched face slackened and then hardened again, but ultimately when the video ended the woman Victoria was looking at was a pale imitation of her usual self. Victoria felt a lump of guilt settle in her throat.

“I really am sorry.” She said. “The last thing I want is to embarrass you at your shower, so I’ve asked that this be held back until tomorrow.”

Madeleines eyes quirked in surprise. “I… thank you, Victoria.” She said softly. “I suppose you do have some idea of what that feels like.”

“Yeah.” Victoria agreed. She slid her phone into her pocket. “Are you going to be ok?”

Madeleine laughed mirthlessly. “Absolutely not.” She sighed and then sat back, perching on the edge of the desk. Victoria stood before her, shifting from one foot to the other. “I never wanted Liam, not like you did, but I wanted the crown. I was so close twice. And both of them let me down. And now you’ll be queen and all the hard work I put in all my life is going down the drain. No. I won’t be alright.”

Victoria chewed on her lip. “You don’t have to be the queen to make a difference.” She said, aware that this would probably sound unbelievably trite coming from her. “You can help Cordonia in your current station. I don’t doubt there isn’t anything you couldn’t do if you put your mind to it.”

Madeleine raised her face and met Victoria's eyes, the green orbs tired. “Except marry a prince.”

Victoria didn’t really have anything to add to that so she decided to keep quiet. Madeleine sighed and pushed off the desk. “I’ll go and cancel the rest of the party.” She said quietly. “Thank you for coming to me with this. It really was the least you could do.” She turned with a sniff and by the time she exited the study the haughty mask was back in place. Victoria listened as those confident footsteps faded into the distance.

*

Drake and Liam were stood together when Madeleine re-entered the ballroom and clapped eyes on her once fiancé. They shared a worried glance as she headed over to Liam. “We have to stop the shower.” She said, ignoring Drake.

Liam nodded. “That was the plan, yes…”

Madeleine didn’t seem to hear him. “Can you invent some reason, please? I just want to go and pack my things.”

“Oh?” Liam asked, bewildered. Drake was frowning as he watched their exchange. “What’s changed your mind?”

Before Madeleine could answer there was a small riot of incoming message tones. Drake reached for his phone, feeling a strong sense of déjà vu after what happened at the Coronation Ball. Madeleine’s face became pale as she pulled her phone from her purse. “No, no, no, no, no.” She was murmuring as she opened it up.

Drake took one look at the screen and his eyes narrowed. “Justin.” He said bluntly. “I guess he decided not to wait after all.”

“She promised.” Madeleine moaned. “She _promised_.”

“Wait, have you seen Victoria?” Liam asked. Drake stopped scowling at the phone to listen.

“Oh yes,” Madeleine said, shoving her phone in her purse. “And she had better not run into me again after this stunt—”

“It wasn’t her,” Drake snapped. “She insisted on waiting.”

“Madeleine, please,” Liam pressed a hand to her upper arm. “Where is Victoria.”

“Victoria!”

They all started at the cry that came from Maxwell and every head turned towards the ballroom doors, where Victoria stood. She wore almost exactly the same outfit she’d worn back in New York when Liam and Drake had met her for the first time. She also wore a confused expression as she pulled out her phone and checked what had just reached her. Liam and Drake saw understanding cross her face and she looked up again, casting apologetic eyes on Liam and Madeleine.

Liam stepped away from Madeleine and cleared his throat. “Thank you all for coming tonight. I am glad you were all here to witness the vindication of Lady Victoria and that those of you who have doubted her honesty and grace will extend your apologies to her.” He caught the eye of his father who was watching with a neutral expression. “To Lady Victoria and the truth!”

The court quickly recovered and Liam watched Victoria freeze as around her, her name was toasted in a chorus of voices. She nodded back looking embarressed but made no move to enter the room as normal levels of conversation resumed.

Madeleine glanced from Victoria to Liam and then Liam felt her fingers press into his hand. He closed his palm automatically over the item she was giving him, waiting until she had passed him before he unfurled his fingers to see the glint of the diamond on the plain gold band.

A rush of press rose up, some trying to stop Madeleine for a comment, the rest pressing on Liam. He held up his free hand and excused himself. Liam didn’t look back as he swept passed the reporters and Drake and headed out of the ballroom, shutting the doors behind him.

Victoria looked up at him and smiled.

“Hi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Dodie, Burned Out. 
> 
> I had a sudden panic when it came to posting this chapter. It's been sitting in my document for months and only now as I come to post did I remember I hadn't named it! Cue sudden search through my long list of songs for Victoria's story for an appropriate title and quote! For this one, I was really thinking of Madeleine, though. This chapter belongs to her in many ways, the end of her dream twice denied. I do feel bad for her despite some of the choices she's made.


	23. Somewhere Only We Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With nothing left in their way, the lovers reunite.

_This could be the end of everything_

Victoria looked at Liam for a moment.

A smile was beaming out from her face, her joy was palpable. The doors behind Liam remained shut and the man gazed down at her. For a time neither moved and then Liam reached one hand to her face, oh so lightly brushing his fingertips over her cheek, down her jaw to tilt her chin.

“Victoria…” he murmured. Victoria just smiled back. Words seemed too hard to form right in that minute so she just smiled and smiled, happiness filling her every molecule. Liam's hand was on her face and she was joyful.

Someone cleared his throat nearby and they turned almost in one motion. Bastian was politely waiting.

“Your Majesty, Countess Madeleine has departed,” Bastian explained, his hands clasped behind his back. “The press are keen to speak to you, as is your father.” His gaze flickered briefly to Victoria who took a step back from Liam.

“They can wait,” Liam said, taking Victoria’s hand as she started to put some distance between them. Victoria looked down at his hand cupping hers and manoeuvred things so she could lace her fingers with his. He squeezed and turned away from Bastian to look straight at her. “Shall we?”

Victoria nodded, still struck dumb by the events of that evening and by the handsome man before her who was so close to being hers. Liam grinned and tugged and she let herself be led away from the ballroom.

Victoria felt as though her feet weren’t touching the ground as they walked, hand in hand, through the palace. Liam guided them to the staircase and up to the second floor. And then he led her to the left, towards the Royal sleeping quarters. Victoria felt a fizz in her belly as she realised she was going towards the private spaces of the royal family, not the guest wing. She watched Liams face in profile until he realised she was looking at him and chuckled self-consciously. “What?” he asked.

She shrugged with a grin. “Nothing. Just looking at you.”

He laughed and stopped, pulling her towards him into an embrace. “Oh, Victoria.”

“Where are we going?” She asked, breathing in the scent of his chest, feeling his heartbeat through his shirt and jacket.

Liam reached around and unlocked a door. “Just my room.” And then he pulled her inside.

Victoria took a few steps into the room and then stopped, peering all around. “Wow, your room?” She took in the space, the furniture, the windows overlooking the hedge maze. The bed. Victoria turned around and smiled at Liam. “It’s very nice.”

Liam nodded. “It serves its purpose.” He pushed away from the door and slowly walked to Victoria. “I sleep here, I work over there.” He pointed to an archway, through which she could see a desk and bookshelves. “Most people enter through a door in that part of the room. I don’t really bring people through this way.”

“Oh?” Victoria asked. “You shouldn’t tell me things like that. It might go to my head if you make it sound like I’m getting special treatment. I might start thinking I’m somebody important.”

Liam reached for her hands and gently pulled her back into his arms. He gazed down at her brushing some loose black strands of hair away from her face. “You are the most important.”

Victoria smiled. It was all she could do at that moment, smile and feel happy. Her face was aching and she thought she probably looked utterly goofy, but she didn’t care. She pressed her lips to his in a long, comforting kiss. His arms held her tightly, she could feel her heart being against his chest. It was the most glorious of simple moments.

When they drew apart slowly, Liam brought up his hand and Victoria watched him open his fingers. Lying on his palm was the gold and diamond engagement ring. The ring she had seen sparkle on Madeleine's slender finger for the past few months. Her heart gave an uncomfortable thump. Victoria looked back up at Liam, his patient, open blue eyes observing her. “Wow.” She said. “I guess there’s really nothing left in our way anymore.”

Liam shook his head and stepped away from her, taking the ring over to his bedside table. He sat down on the edge of his bed as Victoria watched, and he dropped the ring into a drawer. She tried to keep her face neutral and inquisitive, but internally she was confused. “Yes, there is,” Liam said.

Her heart plunged into her stomach. Was this the feeling people had before their organs arrested? “There is?” She asked with a trembling voice. “Did your father say something? Did I do…?”

Liam looked up and held out his hand. She went to him without hesitation, even as her mind whirled with possibilities, each one worse than the last. She clasped his hand and tentatively sat beside him. Liam turned to Victoria. “Victoria, I’m not going to ask you to marry me.” He let that sink in as her brows furrowed before continuing. “Not now. I want to. I would marry you today if I could. I love you completely and I want to spend all of my life with you.”

“I love you, too,” Victoria said. She still felt confused by this turn of events. “I don’t…?”

Liam smiled sadly. “If you could have seen the look on your face when I showed you that ring.”

“Oh,” Victoria said. She hadn’t thought about how she had appeared seeing the ring. She’d felt surprised, certainly, not to mention relieved that Liam was definitely no longer going to be marrying Madeleine. She hadn’t felt anything bad, not as far as she could see. Perhaps a touch of shock, on the edge of the surprise. Shock that it had happened so fast. Maybe her throat had gone dry, but that had been in anticipation, not panic. Hadn’t it? “You don’t want to ask because you think I’ll say no.”

“No, Victoria, I’m afraid you’ll say yes,” Liam replied. Now she really was bewildered. Liam folded his hands over hers. He wasn’t angry, wasn’t unhappy. He smiled at her to reassure her. “Victoria, my love, when you saw that ring you paled. You’ve been honest with me about your understandable reticence to rush into marriage so I wasn’t surprised by that. I know how you feel about it, but that’s not my concern. When you saw the ring you were afraid, but you were resolved. My worry is that you would say yes to my proposal because you want to make me happy. I don’t want…” He broke off for a moment and sighed. “I want to marry you, but I don’t want to do it until you are ready.” Liam reached up a hand and stroked his knuckles over her forehead. “I love you and I love that you think about me and my happiness, but you are the one who has had to fight this whole time. Although the two are not comparable, it’s my turn to put the effort in. It’s down to me to give you time to learn to trust me again. No matter how long it takes, I will wait for you.”

Victoria's eyes were suddenly hot and wet and she blinked, looking down at their hands. He wore his Coronation ring, her fingers were bare. How often over these past months had she imagined a gem on her ring finger? How badly had she yearned for it? And yet, she knew Liam was right. She wasn’t ready to get engaged just yet, no matter the force of her feelings for him. Perhaps because of those intense feelings. They were untrustworthy and fierce, burning wildly out of control like a bonfire with gasoline thrown over it.

“I love you, Liam. I do,” she said, raising her head. “I want to be with you…but you’re right. I’m… scared to jump into an engagement.” Victoria drew a shaky breath and stood, her hands slipping out of his. She wrapped her hands around herself as she took a few slow steps away. “I feel so stupid. I don’t know what’s holding me back.”

Liam watched her from his bed. “You said it best in New York.” She turned to look as he explained. “I left you. I didn’t stand up for you when I should have done at the Coronation Ball.” His eyes clouded as he remembered that night. “I let them take you away, and I left you more than once after that night. I failed you horribly.” She started to protest, but he held up a hand. “I had good intentions, serious concerns for your safety and I promise I’m not being a martyr here. I acknowledge my part in this. I accept that I hurt you deeply and we can’t pretend that didn’t happen.” Liam stood and walked towards her, placing his palm on her back lightly. “I’m not saying we can’t be together.”

Victoria turned, yet more swooping feelings of shock in her belly. “I thought—”

“I was engaged at my Coronation,” Liam said with a shrug. “The rules state engaged or married by my Coronation. I’m the king now and am neither engaged nor married and somehow the world will keep turning and the country will continue to thrive. In all my searching I cannot find a reason behind this archaic law, which suggests to me that it has no bearing on modern rulers. I’ll keep looking into it, but for now, I think the country will survive.” Liam smiled slowly, cupping his hands around Victoria's face and resting his forehead on hers. “I don’t see why we can’t be together while I rebuild your trust in me.”

Victoria didn’t know what to think. “Are you sure? What if it takes years for me to trust you?”

“So, be it,” Liam said, moving his head and dropping a kiss on her hair. “I will wait for you. The only question I have for you today is… is it me?”

She didn’t understand at first. Looking into Liams face she could see real fear in his eyes and she started to grasp what he was asking of her. “You mean do I want to be with you or…”

“Or Drake, yes.” Liam finished. He was trying so hard to be neutral as he asked, but she’d already seen the flash in his eyes. “He told me he was going to fight for you and I have to admit that although a part of me wanted to pass some sort of law that proclaimed that you couldn’t date anyone but me,” he smiled ruefully to show he was teasing, “I respect his right to try and your right to consider him. But I’m not engaged anymore and I want to be with you in any way you’ll have me. I’ll wait forever if that’s how long it takes for you to want to get married, but during that time I want to be with you. So,” he swallowed. “Is it him or me?”

For Victoria, it had never really been a competition. She meant what she’d said to Drake, that if he’d approached her differently in the start she probably would have been conflicted now being asked to choose between them, but he hadn’t. He’d kept a distance between them even as they grew closer over the social season. She loved him, that was true, but she was in love with Liam. “It could only ever be you.” She said softly.

Liam let out a long breath, laughing in relief as he pulled her to him. “Thank God.”

Victoria swallowed as she nestled against his chest, breathing in his scent. “What if I never want to get married?” She had to ask, even if deep down she knew that she did want to marry him. Eventually.

Liam was quiet for a moment; all Victoria could hear was his steady breathing and the thu-thump of his heartbeat. After a while, he spoke. “I would be very sad, but I wouldn’t hold it against you.”

Victoria couldn’t help but smile. He was trying so hard to reinstate her agency now that the chaos of the season and his fathers sneaking around behind their backs. He was right; she had been startled by the appearance of the ring, which still felt like Madeleines, and the expectations Victoria was now under. She would have agreed to marry him if he’d asked; it was what he wanted and she wanted to make him happy, but it would have been the dutiful thing to do, which was not the way either of them would want her to say yes. Liam was also right about how he’d let her down, despite his intentions and now he was making amends. That was worth more right now than a ring and a promise. He loved her. He loved her enough to give her time. She wanted to give him something in return.

Victoria pulled back and looked up with a smile. “I want to marry you. And I don’t think it’ll take years. I just don’t want to rush things, which I know is crazy as our whole time together has been one great rush. I just want to take some time to be with you without the pressure.”

“I understand,” Liam said, his fingers finding her wrist and lightly tracing across her skin. “I will need to speak to the court about this. I want things to be as normal as possible for you, but we will still need to address a few concerns. We’re throwing out the rule book a little and it will take some getting used to.”

“So what are we?” Victoria asked. “Dating?”

“I suppose, though not as—”

“I know it?” She finished along with him with a wry smile. “Does that mean I live with the Beaumonts and you come and pick me up for dinner? Because the Beaumonts estate is kind of far for that kind of arrangement.”

Liam smiled and with a tug he returned them to the bed, sitting beside her, sliding an arm around her shoulder and holding her close. “How about this? I’ve already extended an invitation to the Beaumonts, as well as to Hana and Olivia, to spend Christmas at the palace with me. At least until the new year, we have some time and closeness while we figure things out.” He leaned his head down to rest against hers. “Let’s just take a break for now.”

Victoria felt a weight lift off her as he spoke. A break. It was exactly what she needed. Christmas spent with her friends and with the love of her life. Now that was practically a miracle.

“I would love that.”

*

Drake clocked sight of Justin as he entered looking frazzled and marched over to him. Maxwell had greeted the press secretary before he reached them, but Drake saw Justin look up and meet his eyes. “What the hell were you thinking?” Drake snarled, keeping his voice low. “Quinn specifically told you not to release that footage.”

Justin took a moment to slip his hand out of Maxwell's grip and hold them up in a gesture of peace. “I know, I messed up. Let me explain things to Victoria…”

“Explain to me,” Drake rebuffed. “She’s busy.”

Justin cast his gaze around the room, noticing the absence of both Victoria and the King and he nodded. “Getting engaged?”

“Get—that’s their business,” Drake said, momentarily thrown. He hadn’t really considered that would be what they were doing. He knew a little of her confusion about that aspect, her doubts about what she considered to be rushing into a betrothal. Was that what they were doing? It shouldn’t have bothered him. He knew that. His heart picked up the pace of it's skittish thudding as he tried to get a grip on his thoughts that were scattering at the idea of Liam down on one knee, slipping a ring onto Victoria's finger. It shouldn’t have bothered him. He understood that his brief and brilliant dream of stealing her away for himself was to remain in the realms of fantasy for always. He accepted that. He’d missed his chance and she had made a choice. But even so, his throat felt tight at the thought, his gut twinged with pain. “That’s their business.” He said again, more evenly. “The point is that Quinn is pissed at you. What the hell were you thinking?”

Justin slid his forefinger and thumb beneath his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose. He sighed heavily. “I’d really rather explain it to Victoria in person.” He said, opening his eyes to see that Bertrand had joined their small group. “But I guess I can give you the cliff notes.” Bertrand came to a stop beside Drake and fixed Justin with an imperious look. “I caught a reporter I hadn’t approved filming the press conference. I swear I was careful, but she was going to release the footage so I didn’t feel I had a choice. I had to get there first.”

“It wasn’t what Quinn wanted,” Drake growled.

“Indeed, I’m sure she is most unhappy about this turn of events,” Bertrand chimed in, though he didn’t look particularly upset by it himself. “However what’s done is done and it can’t be helped. I’m sure the King and Victoria will understand in the long run, not to mention I’m sure they will have more important things to think about now.” His face was breaking into a wide smile as he spoke. “We will all have much more to do over the next few months.”

“Months?” Maxwell asked. “I thought the date was already set?”

“It was,” Bertrand said. “But I’m sure, circumstances being what they are, that Victoria will want time to plan her own ceremony. And I imagine the King will want to do what he can to make her happy.”

“So, the date could be moved about?" Maxwell asked with a grin and a glance at Justin who returned a tentative smile. "They could keep the original date or move it backwards or forwards? If we push the boat out, they could even be married by the end of the week?"

“I’ll be out of a job.” Justin joked. Maxwell grinned and took his hand.

“You’ll stick around for the wedding, right?” he asked.

“I wouldn’t miss that for anything.” Justin nodded.

Drake clenched his jaw and stepped away from the three men, eagerly but quietly discussing the merits of Liam and Victoria keeping the original date. Drake felt sick. Married by the end of the week? That felt like an impossible task, yet he could see it. His brain was ready with images of Victoria Quinn in yards of white silk, a tiara in her black curls, walking down the aisle in the cathedral towards Liam. Drake swallowed. This was always the end goal, this was always what they were working towards so why was this suddenly so damn hard? She was never going to be his. He wanted them to be happy, Liam and Victoria. Being together would grant them that happiness. He was their friend, _of course_ , he wanted that. Didn’t he?

A waiter passed him by and Drake swiped a drink, downing the bubbly froth too fast and almost choking on the fizz. Damn champagne. Where could a guy get a stiff whiskey around here? He had to get used to the idea of his friends being married and fast.

As he contemplated this unfortunate, inevitable fact he felt a vibration in his pocket and he pulled out his phone. There was a sense of dread that now accompanied getting a message notification at a function like this, even if he doubted there were any more unpleasant surprises to come, but the feeling vanished when he read the message. He looked up and clapped eyes on Bertrand across the room. He was still grinning and toasting with Justin and his brother. Drake decided to keep his news to himself for the moment. Hold back a little secret of his own while everyone elses attention was turned away. 

Savannah was coming home. Back to the palace. Savannah and Bartie, he should have said. Drake felt a small, joyful smile slip onto his face. That was good news indeed. He decided to head back to his room, dialling his sister as he did to discuss her return with her. He couldn’t wait.

*

“I do have something for you,” Liam said to Victoria. They’d sat together in companionable silence for some time, neither in a rush to get going anywhere. Liam had been stroking his hand lightly over her arm, back and forth, enjoying the feeling of her leaning against him. “You might think it’s silly, but I’d like for you to have it.”

Victoria looked at him with a quizzical expression. “It’s not Christmas yet.” She teased. Liam laughed and stood.

“This isn’t for Christmas.” He replied, going to his vast armoire and pulling the doors open. His suits and shirts hung crisp and clean, but he ignored them to reach up for the shelf above the rail and a box, which was his target. He pulled it down and turned around, leaving the doors open as he went back to the bed and placed the box beside Victoria. She looked from him to the box with a curious look on her face.

“Can I open it?”

“I would very much like it if you did.” Liam grinned. “It’s hardly a gift if you don’t.”

Victoria pulled the lid off and peered inside. When she looked back at Liam her face was yet more confused. “It’s a book?” she asked, gently lifting the book from its box.

“It is,” Liam nodded, feeling a creeping blush warm his neck and cheeks. He felt suddenly shy now that she had the book in her hands. “I know you’ve got some questions about me, things you wish you knew about.”

He watched Victoria's smile turn sheepish. “Yeah. As much as I hate dates, I kind of missed them when I realised I didn’t know a few pretty basic facts about you.”

Liam nodded. “We were apart for too long a time and during that time I missed you immensely, but what does one do when one is bereft without his better half and with limited resources to speak with her?” Now it was Victoria's turn to blush and Liam had to break his small speech to lean towards her to brush his lips against her temple. The rosy hue of her cheeks looked so beautiful when he knew she was happy. “I didn’t know what to do, so I wrote to you.” He reached for the book in Victoria's hands and cracked open the leather-backed cover. “I wrote down letters to you, or I suppose short essays on moments in my life and occasionally just the odd tidbit, or thought I had that I wanted to share with you, but couldn't. I began with the basics.” He dropped his index finger to the first page and watched Victoria's eyes skirt over the words.

“Your name is Liam Alexander Ferdinand Kennard Rys.” Victoria read, speaking each word reverently, tracing her fingertip over the inked words. “You were born here in the palace on the 30th of March 1983.”

“Now you know my birthday.” Liam murmured, moving up to kiss her head so his words breathed into her sweet-smelling hair. He kissed her again.

“And you know mine,” Victoria said. “And you have a million names.”

Liam chuckled. “I have a few, yes.”

Victoria closed the book and held it to herself, wrapped it into a hug as Liam drew back to look at her. “I have had two names in my life. Riley Brooks, the daughter of an Irish immigrant who tried to build a criminal empire and an American who grew up around so much poverty and hopelessness that becoming the wife of a crimelord was akin to becoming a princess. And Victoria Quinn, who wasn’t anyone at all, but wanted to believe she could be one day. How either of them found you I’ll never know, but I’m glad. I’m glad to know you, Liam.” She frowned at the book. “Liam is quite a small name for a king.” She said. He laughed again, not quite sure how to take that. “I had half thought it was short for William.”

“Technically it is though not for me,” Liam said, “William is a family name on my mothers' side, though my mother preferred the short form and said she would never have called me William so didn’t see the point in giving me an even longer name. It was she who came up with Kennard as a nod to my ancestor. My father had wanted to call me Alexander, but as you can see she fought him on that and won, but kept the name as a concession. Apparently, when I was a baby my father tried calling me Alexander in the hopes that it would take off, but it never did. I could have taken any of those names at my Coronation and had an official king name that was different from what my friends call me, but I suppose... It's a bit silly, but Liam is who you fell in love with and I didn't want to be parted from that person. The person you loved.”

Victoria nodded along as if she were soaking up every morsel he was giving her. He wished he’d found the time to tell her all of this back before the Coronation Ball if he had known how happy it would make her.

“Leo called me Ferdi for a whole summer once.” Liam went on. “I think he thought it would be a good sport to tease me and he decided that was the funniest of my names, but I had a strong case of hero worship at that age and so he could have called me Sir Liam the Poopy and I would have called it a compliment.” Victoria giggled. “Another time when I was much smaller he convinced me that our tutor for European history was a troll. He came from Norway, you see. I was very young and foolish so that was all it took to persuade me. Sorry Professor Esben.”

Victoria cut him off by reaching up to cover his mouth with her lips and he responded eagerly in kind. The book was pressed between them as he snaked his hands around her waist to draw her closer. One of her hands slipped behind his neck, fingers lightly teasing the short hairs there and making him shiver.

“I love you, Victoria Quinn,” Liam spoke against her lips, all joking fleeing in the moment.

“I love you, too,” Victoria replied, dipping to his neck and darting small kisses there before he felt her smile against his skin, “I love you, Liam Alexander Ferdinand Kennard Rys.”

Liam laughed and looked down to tilt her chin. “I’m so happy to be here with you.”

“Me, too.” Victoria agreed, nestling against his chest, turning her face so her cheek pressed against his sternum so that he could rest his chin on her head. Liam's heart was pounding, but he was finally at peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Keane, Somewhere Only We Know.
> 
> I checked the Wiki and I couldn't find any other names for Liam, so I went ahead and gave him the most kingliest names I could. And a birthdate. This story isn't set in 2020, it's out of time and space so that a guy born in 1983 can be the age I want him to be darn it! 
> 
> In-game you clear your name and boom, engaged, but I just don't see Victoria being ready to jump straight back into that ride after being booted from it so suddenly and painfully. She's got some more healing to do. So, no ring just yet and I'm giving them some time before the next big ball where nothing bad will happen of course. Justin is definitely not planning anything ever again and they are all going to live happily from now on.


	24. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas at the palace.

_From now on, our troubles will be miles away_

The next few weeks after Liam broke off his engagement and the world prepared for the holiday season, time passed in a blur as Victoria tried to settle into her new normal.

*

“Show us the ring!” Maxwell cried over the sound of scattered applause when Victoria and Liam emerged after the party was shut down and the press had left the premises. He pounced on his friend and grabbed his friends left hand.

“Maxwell, wait—”

“Where is it?” Victoria let him hold up her hand to peer closely at her empty finger. “What happened?”

Bertrand’s face fell and broke her heart a little bit; he’d looked so proud when she first saw him. “I’m sure there is… an explanation?”

Across the room, Drake and Olivia stood apart from each other, but both looked over at Victoria and Liam with near-identical expressions. Olivia steeled herself and drew closer, but Drake wrenched his gaze from them and turned to leave the ballroom. Victoria's heart sank as she watched his retreating back slip through the door. 

“I suppose congratulations are in order?” Olivia asked flatly as she reached the group.

“Apparently not,” Justin muttered on the outskirts of their group. Victoria tugged her hand back from Maxwell.

“Are you not engaged?” Hana asked, her sweet face crumpled in confusion.

Victoria hadn’t expected this to be so hard. Thankfully Liam stepped forward, his hand going to rest on the small of her back. “Victoria and I are together.” He said with a wide smile. “But that doesn’t mean we have to rush anything. We’ve been through a lot -- Victoria has been through a lot lately. We’re going to spend Christmas together with all of you if you would join us and then see how things go in the new year.”

“It’s a good thing, Bertrand,” Victoria said, locking eyes with the older Beaumont, who looked pained. “I promise.”

“Of course it is,” he said, pasting a smile on his face. “I’m delighted to see the pair of you reunited as you always should have been. I’m thrilled for you both.”

Victoria wanted to cross the brief divide and put her arms around him, but even with his jovial expression, she could see the doubt in his eyes. She was letting them all down. Hana was smiling, but even she was perplexed. Maxwell was openly frowning as he tried to reconcile this new development and Olivia was looking at Victoria as if she were insane. She supposed it must have appeared that way to Olivia, who would have married Liam in a heartbeat.

Justin was glowering silently to the side. He threw Victoria a look of disdain, then grabbed his phone and turned away to make a call. To his managers perhaps to say he would be needed for longer on this hopeless case. Victoria's heart sank into her stomach. She half wished she and Liam had remained upstairs, ensconced in their little bubble. She looked down and faked a yawn, that became very real halfway through. She wasn’t totally lying when she said: “I’m beat. I think I need to sleep for a week.”

“Of course,” Liam said. “I’ll ask the servants to clear Madeleine's things out of her suite at once.”

“Liam, wait,” Victoria touched his chest to pause him as he turned to find a maid. “Give the woman time to gather her own things. She’s had a hard day.”

“As have you,” Liam pointed out.

“I don’t need to stay in a suite.” Victoria insisted. “I just need a nap and I can do that anywhere.” Liam's hand folded around hers. It was so strange to be touching him openly in what was relatively public. There were still some nobles milling about as well as servants tidying the uneaten food away. “Seriously, it’s fine.” She gave her hand an experimental tug, but he held fast.

“There are other places you can stay.” Liam smiled. “We have a lot of rooms.”

Victoria smiled tiredly. “OK.”

*

“Kid. A word.” Justin was waiting outside the ballroom and Victoria excused herself from the maid who was leading her upstairs to her room and followed Justin around a corner to a secluded nook. He took off his glasses to rub his eyes before speaking and once again she was struck by how different he looked without them. His eyes were intense as he looked at her, his gaze piercing with barely contained anger. “So. No ring.”

Victoria shook her head. “Not yet.”

“Not _yet_?” Justin slid his glasses back on, but for the first time, this didn’t diminish his expression. “Not yet? When? You realise what this delay is costing the Beaumonts, don’t you? My contract doesn’t end until I get you down the aisle, into the arms of the king and with a crown on your pretty little head.”

Victoria felt a chill douse her as he spoke. It didn’t matter how often they skirted around the subject, the idea that Bertrand and Maxwell had given her one reason for Justin's presence — to help navigate the hostile press — and that he kept confirming that the reason was far closer to engineering her marriage to the King unsettled her. She couldn’t bring herself to ask either Beaumont outright to clarify why Justin was still on their payroll. Better to remain blissfully ignorant of just how badly she’d messed everything up.

“I want to marry him,” Victoria tried, hating how weak she sounded. “I need a little time.”

Justin gave her a long look from which she wanted to shrink away from, but the least she could manage was to hold fast and keep her eyes trained on him as if he wasn’t making her feel about 2 inches tall. “Fine, kid. Take all the time you need, but you won’t make any friends with this delay. The nobles will be back in a few weeks for the New Years Ball, too, so you might want to have something to give them and the press then. Think about it.”

*

Hana and Maxwell came around the idea of the pair dating quicker than the others, but that didn’t mean they weren’t focused on the wedding they expected in the new year. Maxwell had a stockpiled hoard of wedding magazines that he carted around with him wherever he went and he quickly brought Hana into the fold by wafting images of gowns and centrepieces and cakes beneath her nose. Hana had tried to be strong, but she was just as eager to tackle wedding planning and soon was entirely on Maxwell's wavelength. Victoria, who wanted nothing to do with wedding planning right then, started avoiding the pair despite the fact that they were the only two who remained steadfast at the palace over the holidays.

Olivia had elected to return to Lythikos over the Christmas season after all and Victoria was sad to see her go, even though she understood. Olivia had managed one candid conversation with Victoria in which she had explained how difficult it was to see Victoria on Liam's arm despite how hard she had worked to help clear Victorias name and make it happen. Liam was still the great love of Olivia's life after all. Victoria threw herself into Christmas present shopping now that she was staying in Cordonia, but it turned out there was no perfect present to send to your friend who was getting over your boyfriend and couldn’t bear being in the same room as the pair of you. Victoria ended up sending her a set of Smith & Wesson throwing knives, though no doubt Olivia had a whole room of knives back at her manor.

Bertrand was trying to understand and Victoria was so grateful to him for that. He didn’t get it, couldn’t comprehend Victoria's position, but didn’t overstep his bounds and seemed to trust Victoria to know what was best. In the run-up to Christmas however, he slipped up and took Liam aside to press him on how long this would take. After that, he left for the Beaumonts estate, ostensibly on important business, but in part, it was to get away from the other guests at the palace.

Savannah and Bartie arrived not long after the disastrous engagement shower. Drake had an apartment at the palace — his parents old home— and his sister and nephew moved in with him. Before they arrived Drake was a ghostly presence in the palace, hovering on the outskirts of everything the small group did, but once they moved in he disappeared entirely.

Victoria had one conversation with him before then on the day after she moved back to the palace…

*

The soft knock to her door came before dawn had a chance to break, but Victoria’s sleep schedule was so askance that she was awake to hear it. Expecting Liam, she had hurried to the door and opened it to find the retreating back of one Drake Walker. “Drake?”

He winced. Clearly he had changed his mind about seeing her and had decided to leave it, but instead, she had caught him. He turned, his eyes bloodshot from the alcohol she could smell on his breath when he came back to her door.

“Hey there, your _Highness_ ,” he slurred. Victoria flinched and tugged him into the room before anyone could see him like that. He stumbled over the threshold but caught himself before he fell.

“Drake, what are you doing?” she asked, guilt gnawing at her.

“I figured I’d been remiss before,” Drake slurred turning around unsteadily. “Didn’t congratulate you on your… your engagement.” He hiccoughed sadly but grinned a wide, loose grin that only moved the corners of his mouth and never reached his dark eyes. “Let’s see your shiny rock then.”

Victoria pulled the robe she had donned over her pyjamas tighter around her waist. Her tired eyes became damp as she looked at him, always happy with a drink in his hand and liable to drown his sorrows, but she had never seen him truly drunk before. “Drake, I’m not engaged.”

The sudden changed that crossed Drakes expression clenched her heart like a fist, as his sloppy smile fled and an urgent, desperate wanting twisted his features instead. He looked hopeful when he stepped closer and took her left hand, seeing the evidence for himself. His rough thumb pad pressed over the knuckle of her bare ring finger. “God… Quinn…”

“Drake—”

“ _Victoria_ ,” her name came with a side of whiskey breath. “Did you turn him down? I thought… could you…?” His other hand reached for her face, trembling when he touched her skin.

Victoria squeezed her hand over his, hating herself. “No. Drake, I’m not engaged, but I am with Liam. We're... we're dating.”

Drake dropped her hand like it was a hot poker and stepped back. “Oh.” He turned away, striding to the window where the curtains were open with a view of the grounds. Not a tree in view. Nowhere for the press to hide and intrude on her slumber. The window seat held a blanket and her book —the book of Liam— where she had left them when the knock came. Drake's hand was a tight knot that sank against the cool glass. His other hand was on his hip and he took several steadying breaths. Victoria watched him, wondering where he would land. He was hurting, sure, but how would that manifest? He whirled, eyes blazing. So he was going with pissed. “Sorry to bother you, Quinn. Do let me know when you pick a day, won’t you? I’ll look out for the save the date card in the post. I’m obviously not important enough to learn about this kind of life changing news in person anymore.”

“Drake—” Victoria didn’t try to stop him when he brushed past her and made for the door, but she raised her voice and sped up her words as if she could force him to listen to her. “I should have gone to find you after speaking with Liam. I’m sorry—”

“Don’t be sorry,” Drake said at the doorway. “Just hurry up and live your happily ever after.”

And then he was gone.

*

Savannah’s presence was enough to frighten Bertrand away and keep Drake hermitted in his part of the palace. Victoria didn’t even know where that was. Liam had been to welcome Savannah back to Cordonia and meet Bartie for the first time, but Victoria hadn’t gone with him. If Liam and Drake had bridges to rebuild she couldn’t be a part of that. She had shaken the foundation of their friendship and had to step aside now. Besides, Drake had been so unhappy when she saw him last that she wasn’t brave enough to face him again just yet.

Instead, Victoria had discovered the library and was dividing her time between there and the kitchens, where she had found a similar welcome to the one she had found at Applewood. As much as she had been warned that this wasn’t Future-Queen behaviour by the head cook, Mrs Fraser, she had nevertheless been brought under her wing and set to work baking in the run up to Christmas. Victoria threw herself into two worlds; one where the smell of books and leather swam around her head, where silence reigned and she could explore at her leisure the vast amounts of doorways to other worlds, real and imaginary; the other spiced with cinnamon and nutmeg, where she was fed morsels of fresh bread with apple butter or soups full of winter vegetables and chatter prevailed, laughter and jokes and she returned to her room wearing seeds or flour on her clothes more often than not. Liam could find her in the library, but nobody could find her down in the warm heart of the palace. That was how she liked it.

Of course, they couldn’t hide forever. The press was kept away from the palace over the festive season, which meant Justin had no reason to be around either. Victoria was glad of that; he had been so frustrated with her the night she had let everyone down.

*

One terrifying evening early on she was forced to endure a meal with Liam, Constantine and Regina, where the King Father side-eyed her over their roasted salmon and the conversations revolved around why Victoria didn’t want to get married without anyone actually asking. Regina, to give her due credit, tried to bridge the gap between the two men who were still very unhappy with each other and Victoria, who was losing herself with every day spent in the palace.

*

Christmas was a welcome distraction. Victoria’s gift planning had been very last minute with very limited funds. Liam had advised her that as his partner she would be eligible for a stipend to effectively pay for her presence at functions and for various charitable works, but she had asked him not to arrange anything just yet. She didn’t feel very much like she was his partner and didn’t feel like she’d worked at all thus far, not for the greater good of Cordonia at least. She managed to cover the cost of Olivia's knives, which she had bought online, and then selections of books for the rest of her friends that she had found in a secondhand bookstore not far from the bakery where she and the others had gone way back in the early days of the social season. She and Hana had gone into town together donning woolly hats and scarfs to hide their appearance, with Bastien tailing them on Liams orders. Victoria knew she had to start getting used to that and was glad Hana was with her for the trip. She would have loved for Maxwell to have joined them, but he was busy with uncle duties.

The bookshop was quaint, but had the wonderful effect of looking tiny from the outside, but spanned plenty of floor space inside, with books on the cellar level and the first storey, too. The older gentleman running the shop either didn’t recognise them when they removed their disguises inside or was too polite to mention and he left them mostly unattended while he sat behind his counter reading with a cat perched purring beside him. Victoria had been thrilled to see the classic bookstore and pet combination, but as a woman on a mission with far too few days of peak present shopping left she had set to work.

For Maxwell, she found a set of 1980s trashy novels, all clearly based on James Bond, but with more hairspray and fake tans. The man on the cover of the books oozed cool and had a look about him of the younger Beaumont, which she felt sure would tickle him especially given his detective work hunting down Tariq. For his brother, Victoria came across a trilogy of the greatest naval battles from the 1700s to present day (present day being 1963 according to the publication date inside the books). While Hana was upstairs looking at the children’s section for Bartie, the hobby section yielded a great find of some large coffee table books detailing European fashions throughout the decades, complete with sketches. Someone had already snapped up the 1940s and the 1960s, but Victoria was happy enough with the ones she was able to get and then she threw a copy of Charlottes Web on top of her pile as Hana had never read it.

Drake proved tricky. Whenever she thought of buying him a gift, her insides crunched uncomfortably and the image of him storming from her room in a drunken haze came to mind. Never mind present buying; that happened whenever she thought of him at all. She asked the shopkeeper if he had a copy of The Princess Bride, even though she had never gotten her copy back from him as it was the only thing she could think of. He hadn’t, but he did have a dusty copy of Marathon Man and as that was also by William Goldman she took it, hoping Drake liked thrillers.

Liam, she recalled, owned a guitar that had been his mothers and she was able to find a book on how to play for beginners. It felt weak as far as gifts went, but she had no idea what to buy for him. In a very different way to how she felt when she thought of Drake now, Victoria's mind just drew blank after blank as she tried to think of a present for him. She supposed that was because she knew that all he really wanted from her was something she wasn’t ready to give.

Victoria learned that the best part of having Bastien tail her was that he was able to organise for their purchases to be collected by one of his staff and taken to the palace, which was very handy indeed as the fashion books alone was each the weight of a brick.

The women popped into a shop filled with children's clothes to find gifts for Bartie, but while Hana cooed over the small outfits and tiny shoes, Victoria found herself smothered by the contents of the store. After marriage came children and that was a whole other nightmare she had to learn to accept. She liked children just fine, but she had never considered that she would have any herself, not with her family history and belief that she would remain solo on purpose for the rest of her life. Liam, on the other hand, would fill the palace with them if he could. He’d been smitten with the smallest Beaumont when he met him and had visited him a few times after, that much had been clear from the way his eyes had shone when he described holding Bartie or the way the baby had smelled or how cutely Bartie had snuffled in his sleep.

Victoria had already forgotten how old Bartie was so fired off a quick text to Maxwell, who replied immediately with the best sizes to buy Bartie clothes in and then her phone beeped again. He’d sent her a snap of everyone who was at Drakes place at that moment in time, which turned out to be a delightful picture of Savannah and Drake either side of Liam who was cradling the small boy and radiating delight. It was all Victoria could do not to fling her phone at the wall. She bought some onesies with different dinosaurs on them for every day of the week and hurried from the store.

*

Christmas Day at the palace was unlike anything she could have imagined.

Liam woke her that morning with a knock at her door, a kiss and a seasonal greeting: “Merry Christmas, love.”

Victoria smiled and wiped the sleep from her eyes; she hadn’t been able to relax and spent much of the night reading quietly, or sitting at her window seat watching the stars cross the sky. Her childhood Christmasses were scored on her memory and she couldn’t help but recall them during her night of naval gazing. She supposed she had enjoyed the holidays as a very small child when she believed in Santa and magic and presents appearing beneath the tree. The shine had worn off quickly as had the rest of the novelty of her childhood thanks to Jimmy and Kate, who didn’t need an excuse to drink and party but took it anyway. Soon her Christmas memories consisted of screaming and shouting, throwing and punching, and sometimes, if they hadn’t passed out already, very loud make-up sex. Victoria, or Riley back then, had become used to this pattern so that when she left and found herself sharing her first Christmas away from home with a strange new family at the farm where she was working and living she had been blown away by how normal and boring it was. Sitting at a table aged seventeen with a fake name, holding hands over an enormous dressed roasted goose and saying grace before opening presents as snow fell outside… that was the moment she knew she had to move on before she ruined the peaceful family with her presence.

Since then December the 25th passed with her picking up extra shifts so her co-workers could go home to their families. She was a managers dream as she never wanted to work any of the holidays, going home alone with Chinese take out every year she lived in New York.

Christmas at the palace was eerily similar to that Christmas when she was seventeen, especially given the gift that Liam had gotten her.

After waking her he advised her to wrap up warm and that he would meet her by the front door in fifteen minutes. Bewildered, but intrigued, Victoria dressed in her boots and jeans, a soft jumper, a coat and finished off with her hat and scarf. Liam was waiting by the door as he’d said and he offered her his hand to lead her outside. Snow was falling because Cordonia had to keep on showing its beauty to her even after she’d fallen in love with the place. She smiled at the thought and the corny words that flashed into her mind, that Liam was exactly the same way, but kept it to herself. They walked softly over the settled snow around the side of the palace where the royal stable block was. There was nobody around; the horses had already been fed and the staff had the day off in between the morning and evening feeds. Liam pushed open the large doors to enter the large building, flicking a switch and lightly the place up. One or two horses nickered as someone entered their home, but mostly they were tucked up in their stables with rugs and full hay-nets to snack on. They were content to let the people walk the length of their home.

Liam had taken her hand again and walked her towards a stable near the back. Victoria didn’t speak though inside she was a fit to bursting with questions. Finally, they reached a stable and Liam clucked his tongue. The inhabitant of the stall had it’s back to them, but when Liam made his noise of encouragement, it turned around steadily, revealing a black horse with a small white star on the forehead. Victoria, still utterly perplexed as to what they were doing, automatically stepped forward and held out her hand for the horse to sniff before reaching over to pat its neck.

“This is Raven Queen.” Liam introduced, rubbing the horse behind the ears. “She’s the daughter of my favourite mare, the horse I learned to ride on when I was a boy. Her sire produced some incredible racehorses, including Marabelles Dream, who you might remember won the Derby last year?”

“I remember,” Victoria said, drawing closer to the sweet mare, who nuzzled her shoulder gently. “She was the underdog of the race.”

“She was.” Liam agreed, smiling. “Well, Raven Queen is her sister, but her lines aren’t quite what you would want in a racer. Her mother is more of a showjumper and Raven Queen has inherited more of her mothers' strength and spirit, than her fathers' speed. She’s been broken and brought on, but she’s still young enough that her owner can really find a partnership with her.”

“She’s so beautiful,” Victoria remarked, smiling as Raven Queen lifted her nose and brushed velvety whiskers over her face. “Is she yours?”

“No. She’s yours.” Liam said. Victoria turned her head sharply, forgetting that many horses didn’t take kindly to sudden movements near their faces, but Raven Queen just lowered her nose to snuffle her hand again, quite at ease.

“Mine?” Victoria squeaked.

“I can’t think of anyone who could treat this lovely girl better than you,” Liam said, patting Raven Queen's neck. “Merry Christmas, sweetheart.” He leaned over and kissed Victoria on the lips, while she stood still in shock.

“You bought me a horse?” She asked, just to make sure. “A horse?”

“Do you… do you like her?” His smile wavered, betraying his nerves.

“She’s amazing,” Victoria said, turning back to her horse and stroking her face from her star down to her nose. “I don’t know what to say. No-one’s ever bought me a horse before. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Liam touched her waist, settling his arm around her. “In the New Year, she can be moved to your duchy.”

Victoria's stomach flipped at this casual reminder that Liam would be elevating her status to that of duchess at the New Years Eve Ball. It came with a swathe of land and a fancy home, so he said, and now she had a brand new horse to go with it all. And all she’d got him was a book and a request for patience. It hardly seemed fair.

*

Victoria's gifts to her friends were a mixed bag of reactions. Liam was over the moon with his book, though she felt quite stupid giving that small gift when he had bought her a horse. Hana was equally thrilled with her gift and Maxwell with his. Bertrand stayed at the Beaumonts estate and Drake didn’t make an appearance either, so their gifts remained under the tree in the hallway unopened, as did the clothes for Bartie and the gift bag of wine and bubble bath that Victoria had grabbed last minute for Savannah.

Christmas dinner was only made bearable by the presence of Hana and Maxwell. Liam and his father were still struggling to find peace with each other, but Hanas years of training and Regina's commitment to being polite carried them all through the meal before they were able to make their excuses.

The palace would be filled soon enough with nobles once more for the New Years Ball, so Victoria tried to make the most of the peace and quiet. She was dreading their arrival and facing a raft of confused faces as she was still around, but not engaged to Liam and similarly eager for the event as that more than anything would have to drag her friends back to the palace. Maybe she could make things right by everyone then. It was a slim hope, but it was all she had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter title has been sung by loads of different artists over the decades, but I'm going with the original Judy Garland version from the film Meet Me In St Louis, which is a guilty pleasure of mine.
> 
> This chapter feels like filler, but I couldn't not have it in my fic. With my deviation from canon and the timeline, I needed to cover Christmas and the run up to New Years (as the upcoming ball is, erm, quite important!) and I didn't want to just handwave it away. Please forgive me this indulgence!
> 
> I finally got my Victoria a pet! In-game she has every single animal anyone has ever made me use diamonds for, but they never worked into this fic, until now. Christmas horse, a gift for all ages!


	25. The Wreck of our Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victoria makes a discovery that sends her straight to Liam's door. 
> 
> (NSFW chapter due to sexy times)

_There’s a me without you, but that’s not where I belong_

_"Take all the time you need, but you won’t make any friends with this delay."_

Victoria thought about Justin’s dire words every day as the New Years Eve Ball approached. She had a lot of time on her hands now she lived at the palace and was slowly alienating her friends.

The day after Christmas she entered her room to find that the previously empty wardrobe had been filled with garment bags. She assumed that these were the gowns she’d worn over the season, but when she unzipped the first opaque bag she found a golden dress peeking out. Her heart in her throat, she slid the bag off the dress to find a freshly laundered gown she recognised from what felt like years ago. It was the dress she’d worn the night of the Coronation Ball, the golden dress she’d paired with black accessories and which she’d worn when Liam had lain her on the soft grass beneath the moonlight and they’d made love for the first time together right there in the middle of the hedge maze. She coloured at the memory but was already checking the next bag to find the blue gown from the first ball, complete with the masquerade mask tied around the hanger. Further exploration revealed the silver sheath dress she’d worn in Lythikos and every other outfit she’d bought over the past social season. All the gowns she’d left behind when Bastien had forced her to pack her things and sent her to the airport. Everything she’d thought she’d lost forever, cleaned and safely stored away and now returned to her. That thought propelled her down several corridors until she reached Liam's door and knocked for him. It was late and they had already said goodnight, but she had to see him.

“Victoria,” Liam smiled within moments of cracking the door. “Are you alright?”

“Can I come in?” she asked, breathless from speeding through the halls. “Just for a second?”

She hadn’t asked to go to his room since the first night she had been asked to stay. It felt strangely like she and Liam were teenagers rather than adults, given that his dad and stepmother lived in the palace and slept just around the corner from his room, but Liam was happy to let her in. He was much more ready to flaunt their relationship — it was his home after all so it made sense that he felt comfortable there — while she still felt like an interloper living rent-free in someone else's fancy home.

Liam had been reading at his desk when she’d disturbed him; there was a lamp behind the desk and one on the table itself and both were lit, while the sleeping part of his room was dark. She crossed the space to stand by the workspace, suddenly awkward. “Am I interrupting?”

“Never,” Liam said from behind her, sliding his hand around her waist and pressing his lips to her neck. Victoria closed her eyes and tilted her head, allowing him better access so that she could enjoy the sensation for a little while. Then she spun slowly in his arms.

“I found my dresses,” Victoria said without preamble. “In the wardrobe. Liam, where did they come from?”

Liam reached up to tuck her hair back away from her face and dropped a kiss on her forehead. “Bastien brought them to me the morning after you left the palace. He didn’t want them to get lost or be auctioned off by some chancer hoping to cash in on your misfortune.”

“Bastien?” she recalled him asking her if she was taking the dresses and she’d replied that there had been no point to schlepping them back to the States. She’d thought they were lost forever. “Really?”

“He told me it was up to me what I wanted to do with them, so I put them in my wardrobe,” Liam admitted. His gaze lowered. “It’s probably really silly, but I thought that if I kept them with my things it would feel like a part of you was still with me. No, it definitely was silly; we were on the road so long that I didn’t even have them with me. I had them cleaned and pressed and put in your room when you said you’d stay here over Christmas. I knew I needed to return them to their rightful owner.”

Victoria swallowed. So many important events had passed between them in that season and even washed those dressed held the memories, like invisible stitches in the designs. She’d made her peace with leaving them, but now that they were back in her life she was grateful to Liam and unexpectedly to Bastien, but it was Liam she was with and who she rose up on bare tiptoes to kiss.

His hand slid around to the back of her neck, fingers curling in her hair and tipping her head back as he responded urgently. They hadn’t spent the night together since Applewood, hadn’t done anything more than a chaste kiss here or there since New York and her birthday in the hotel room. Victoria felt the heat between them build as the kiss deepened and couldn’t think of a reason to hold back anymore. She crept her fingers around his waist and tugged him closer so that they were flush together. Liam smiled into the kiss, hopeful. “Oh?”

Victoria looked up at him. “If you want to?”

“ _Victoria_ ,” his voice was low and rumbled. “I want to very much.”

Their mouths met again with fervour, his hands grasping the back of her neck until one of them slid down her back to skate along the waistline of her pyjama bottoms. Her’s veered northwards, slipping beneath his shirt, tugging it loose first and touching the delicious partnership of soft and hard she found on his lower belly, where muscles coiled beneath downy hair and smooth skin. Victoria moved her hand up only to find her way blocked by the shirt and it’s tiresome perfect fit. She huffed in irritation, making Liam chuckle and he removed his hands from her hair to begin working on his top button. Victorias fingers felt clumsy in comparison, fumbling with the buttons at his waist. Liam's low laughter swept over her as he reached her hands and took over, unbuttoning the last one so that Victoria could impatiently reach up and push the shirt over his shoulders. Liam laughingly protested, but couldn’t stop her from pulling the shirt down his arms, only to find his hands tangled at the sleeves.

“Cuff links.” Liam’s one-word explanation doing nothing to calm the querulous storm inside her. He pulled back to try to roll the sleeves back over his hands to allow access to the cuff links, Victoria offering no help, electing instead to get in the way by reaching for his face, cupping it in her hands and turning him to kiss her. He obliged willingly, eagerly, even while his arms were useless struggling to free his hands. Victoria opened her mouth and let her tongue probe at his, hoping to encourage greater fire between them and feeling a thrilling speed through her when it worked. Liam pulled one hand free of his bonds and wrapped it around her, holding her tight. Her breasts pressed into his bare chest and Victoria let out a small mewl of excitement, spurring him further. He stepped on the trailing shirt and yanked his hand, freeing it with the sound of a small rip and a clatter as the cuff link flew to land somewhere unseen and then his hand was skimming her thigh to find her backside, fingers squeezing the soft flesh he found.

Victoria's hands skated down his face over his shoulders and along his arms, where his biceps flexed as his arms curled around her. Her nails caught his skin and spurred him further before slipping to his trousers. She hooked fingers into the belt and jerked him closer, feeling him hard beneath the fabric between them. Her tug toppled their precarious balance and Victoria felt them tumbling backwards, her arms going behind her to brace herself on the desk there, knocking something to the ground. This more than anything gave her pause and she pulled her face away, turning to look at the folder that was splayed open on the rug on which the desk stood, pages scattered.

“Oh, sor—” she began, but Liam didn’t seem to care. In a move she had previously thought confined to the most bodice ripping of rom-coms, Liam's arm pushed past her to swipe at the detritus on the desk, shunting books and papers to the floor. A fountain pen toppled off the edge and the lamp vanished from view, going dark with a pop. Her pupils reacted, widening to take in the only slivers of light coming from the moon shining through the window. Liam’s shirtless chest, heaving from his exertions, was suddenly silver, as though he were carved from marble and she was almost afraid to break the spell of the vision that was the man she loved. His eyes were dark with lust and fixed on her. He was so beautiful. Victoria bit her lip. “Liam…”

He responded by cupping her backside and hoisting her onto the desk. The hard wooden top was softened only marginally by a raised leather desk mat. Victoria couldn’t deny the frisson of giddy excitement at his urgency, even if the whole thing felt mildly corny. He returned to her neck, slipping a finger to the neckline of her top and pulling, granting more access to her skin.

A knock at the door made her jump. “Your majesty? Is everything alright?”

Victoria clamped her mouth shut to hold back nervous giggles as Liam growled quietly before answering. “Yes, everything’s fine. I just dropped something.”

“Very well.”

Liam looked back at her, his eyes stormy and wild. “Where were we?”

Victoria held up a hand, her mirth spent. “Wait, Liam, maybe we should…?”

“You want to stop?” he asked, his hands trailing lazy circles on her waist.

“I just…” Victoria took a breath before continuing. “We broke your lamp and all your work is everywhere and I didn’t mean to disrupt your evening.”

“Victoria you disrupt all my evenings,” Liam said, not moving away from her where he had one hand on her side, the other braced on the desk beside her thigh. His face was close enough to warm her neck with his breath. “Every night I sit here and I work before bed and you are with me the whole time. Knowing you are in the palace, finally safe, but out of reach while I sign documents and read files; some nights I have been driven half-mad by imagining you sitting on this desk just like now, albeit less dressed.” He locked eyes with her. “I don’t care about the lamp or the mess. I _love_ you. I _want_ you.” His words ceased as his lips found her collarbone and kissed along the length of it. Victoria shivered. “We can stop if you want to.”

Victoria didn’t want to stop. In answer to his question, she grasped the hem of her pyjama top and pulled it up and over her head, flurrying her dark hair around her shoulders when the article came off. Liam's eyes widened approvingly as he took in the sight of her now just as naked as he was from the waist up, the top dropped behind her. Victoria reached for him, bringing his face closer for a kiss before he dipped and captured her nipple with his lips. The moan that escaped her was louder than she had intended and she clapped a hand across her mouth in a hurry. Liam's hand breezed up her waist and around to her back, where the mottled flesh lived. Victoria couldn’t help but tense, though she knew he loved her regardless of her scars. He was focused on her breasts, moving his other hand to the one untouched by his mouth and Victoria let out another moan into her hand. Now that she had been reminded that there were guards and servants using the hallways she needed to be quiet. The last thing she wanted was for them to have an audience.

“Have you ever…” she began dropping her hand to his hair and catching her breath. “Have you ever been with anyone in your room?”

Liam raised up, holding the back of her head again and gently easing her backwards across the desk. “Never.” He sighed, dropping more kisses over her chest. “Only you. Only tonight.”

Victoria was glad of the t-shirt she had left behind her to cushion her head as Liam worked his way down her body, trailing kisses that burned like fire, gathered between her legs in a glorious heat. Liam reached her hips and manoeuvred her into raising them enough to pull her pants and underwear off in one motion until she was draped nude across his desk like an erotic painting. Liam seemed to appreciate her as a work of art, because he stepped back, standing above her watching her as he kicked off his shoes. His belt clinked softly as he worked the buckle next. Victoria looked up, her breathing rapid, her skin raising with goose flesh in anticipation.

“I love you, Victoria Quinn,” Liam said as he worked the belt loose and then his fly. “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.” His slacks glided down his thighs. “I want to make you feel good in every way.” He stepped out of the trousers and kicked them away. “I want to keep you safe and you must know that beside you I stand ten times taller than I do without you.” His socks were next, Liam bowing before her to yank them off his feet and toss aside. “You make me a better man in every way and I adore you.” His boxers were last, revealing his erection, which bounced as it was set free and then stood proud. “I have imagined you like this so often that I made preparations.” He reached for a drawer in his desk pulling out a condom and making light work of donning it before returning to his words of worship. “You are the perfect woman. I want to make love to you every night you’ll have me, but…” he moved between her thighs, parting them with ease as she let herself open to him. Liam leaned down, his fingers disappearing below her pubic hair, finding that she was wet and ready. Victoria hissed and writhed at his probing touch as he punctuated each word with a curl of his fingers, his thumb circling her clitoris. “Right now I want to fuck you right here on this desk until you come undone.”

Victoria thrust her arm across her mouth, sinking her teeth into her own wrist to hold back the cry that threatened to spill out and bring every guard in the place running. Liam was only spurred on by this, inserting another finger into her, making her squirm at his touch. The fire inside her was burning hotter than she could bear, the discomfort of the desk a distant memory in light of Liam's ministrations. Another finger found its way inside her and she covered her face with her hand over the arm that was already over her mouth, moaning into her own skin. She was going to break apart any minute now and shatter into a thousand, quivering pieces.

Liam's mouth breathed over her thighs, his tongue darting across her skin. His fingers and thumb continued their dance between her legs before his mouth took over, his hand sliding up and over her belly up towards her breasts, where he turned his thumb onto her nipple, her own slickness helping bring it to a dusky rose peak. At the crest of her legs, Liam's tongue delved into her folds, running up towards her clitoris, sparking jolts of pleasure up her body from the sensitive root.

Victoria pulled her arms away from her face, her teeth sinking into her lower lip, pushing onto her elbows. She could see his blonde hair, tousled with sweat as his head bobbed between her thighs. His hand didn’t let up squeezing and caressing her breast, focused entirely on his task and her coiling pleasure. She was ready, more than ready for him and she wanted him. “Liam,” she moaned, reaching down to find his face. He didn’t stop. “Liam, I need you.” Her fingers curled in his mussed hair and she twisted the locks between her knuckles. “Liam, _fuck_ me.”

That did the trick, and Liam raised up, climbing over her with a speed that threw her backwards. He caught her between her shoulder blades before the back of her head could collide with the desk, his hand splayed behind her. Victoria forgot about his palm pressed to her scars as Liam reached his other hand between them, taking himself in hand and guiding him home. She cried out — she couldn’t help it — as he inched his way inside her, his face a picture of restraint as he made sure to sheath himself slowly, setting a tortuously steady pace. Victoria reached around to his back, stroking down the broad expanse until she found the curve of his ass and grabbed him, dragging him closer. Liam groaned at her movements, sliding up to the hilt inside her. “Liam,” Victoria said in a low voice trapped between them where they touching foreheads. “I said, fuck me.”

“As you wish.” Liam murmured, driving deeper. She sucked in a breath, gripping him tightly around the waist as he found a rhythm against the desk, his hips pounding again and again and again. The desk stood firmly beneath her unmoving, Liam’s arm around her, the other on the desk and he thrust into her, his aim deep and true.

“Liam,” she gasped, holding him closer, desperate to increase the friction between them. Liam growled and straightened up, bringing her with him so that she was perched with her ass on the edge of the desk, his mouth on her neck. She wrapped her legs around him, nudging him deeper with her heels.

“Victoria, Victoria, oh God Victoria…” her name was a song on her skin that Liam repeated in time with his movements.

“Wait, hang on,” Victoria gathered her thoughts, long enough to break through Liam’s assault inside her. He drew his face back, an urgent question in his eyes. “You lie on the desk.”

Liam didn’t stop to ask; his desire to keep going enough to follow her orders without waiting. He lifted her again, still inside her, and turned to sit atop his desk. Her knees rested either side of him and she squirmed happily at the feeling of his erection deep inside her. She smiled and pushed him gently to fall back against the wood, bending over him, her hair falling around him. He shuddered and let out a groan that she stole from his mouth with a kiss. His palms found her nipples again as she started to move on top of him, drawing herself along the length of his erection, from the base to the tip, before plunging him back inside her. He cried out into her mouth, his eyes wide and locked onto hers, a plea inside the wild orbs to keep going. She smiled against his lips and repeated the move, her own desire twisting around her centre. She arched her back, breaking the kiss. The pressure was perfect, the sensation overwhelming and as Victoria looked down at Liam, his hair wild, his mouth open in a helpless, silent cry of delight at her movements, she felt a swell of love for him. “Liam…”

“Oh God, Victoria, please,” he gripped her hips hard and pulled her down onto him, losing control beneath her. The pressure released and Victoria swallowed the shout as her orgasm took over, riding the waves of pleasure atop him as he came. “I… _yes_ , fuck, God, _marry me._ ”

Victoria flinched, losing the rhythm and her climax in one fell swoop. He was still going, seeming unaware that he had spoken the words aloud. She waited, frozen as he came to an end and fell back against the desk, eyes shut, breathing hard. There were finger marks on her hips when he let her go.

“I love you,” he murmured around a lazy smile. Victoria wiped at her face finding tears rushing over her cheeks. That wasn’t really him proposing to her. He’d been in the throes of an intense orgasm and was now drowsy and stupid, hardly the time to propose to anyone. He had promised he wouldn’t ask her to marry him, he had _promised_ he would wait until she was ready. She couldn’t hold this against him.

Yet hearing those strangled words, words she had once hoped to hear after their first time together… she bent down and kissed him on his cheek, a tear dripping onto his face. His arms came up around her again and he turned his face to kiss her, trying for her lips, but landing on her temple and then snuggling her closer with a satisfied sigh. Victoria rested her head on his chest, unable to move away, lost for words.

“Mmm. Stay with me tonight.” Liam said softly into her hair. “I do have a bed that is much more comfortable than this. I want you in it till morning.”

It would have been easy. He breathed in and out slowly and her face rose and fell with him while she considered his words. She could spend the night in his bed and wake up with him, something she had never done before. She could pretend he hadn’t said anything. They could have sex again, taking their time, slowly exploring each other at a leisurely pace. They could have all of that if she spent the night.

“I better get back,” Victoria replied, her throat dry. She lifted her leg over him, climbing down off the desk. He sat up and busied himself with the condom as Victoria found her clothes and pulled them back on and in no time at all she was back in her pyjamas and at the door.

“Hold on, let me walk you back,” Liam said, grabbing his boxers. “Are you sure you don’t want…?”

“It’s fine,” Victoria said. She cast a guilty look over to the mess beside the desk. “Oh, I should help you with your stuff.”

Liam glanced at it and then away, pulling up his underwear. “No, it’s fine I’ve got it.”

“OK. Goodnight.”

“Wait, Victoria,” he bounded over to the door before she could open it, and touched his hand to her chin, raising her face even as she lowered her eyes to avoid him. “What’s wrong?” Liams voice was soft and worried. “Was that not… was it too much?”

“It was great,” Victoria said, wrapping her arms around herself.

“Then what is it?” He put his hands on her upper arms and rubbed gently. “What did I do?”

Guilt filled her and Victoria finally looked up to match his gaze and spoke, her voice trailing off to a barely there whisper. “You said… when you came you said… you said ‘marry me’.”

Liam blanched. “I did? Oh, I…” he sighed and broke their stare. “I’m sorry. I was thinking about asking you while we were… I was playing out the fantasy of asking you. I didn’t mean to say it.”

“That’s what you meant about me being in your thoughts?” Victoria pressed. “How often do you picture asking me?”

To the outside observer, it might have appeared that Liam was confessing some terrible sin to see the expression he wore. “Every day. When I’m falling asleep. When I let my mind wander from my work. I’m sorry. I don’t want to make you feel pressured in any way.”

“But you think about it all the time.”

“Yes.”

Victoria nodded. She couldn’t be mad at him for that. He’d always been upfront about what he wanted from her, even as he put his needs aside to wait for her. She wasn’t angry; she was tired and despondent and ashamed that the thought of being proposed to sent such lightning bolts of terror through her. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t,” Liam pulled her to him and held her tight. “You’ve nothing to be sorry for.” She sank into his embrace and let herself be held.

“I love you.” She said into his chest. “I really do.”

“I know,” Liam said. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay. I would really like you to.”

“I can’t,” Victoria said. “I don’t want to feel caught when your staff wake you up tomorrow.”

“I can tell them to leave me to sleep.”

“No, that feels just as obvious as taking a sign out in the morning papers,” Victoria said with a wan smile. “I’ll go back to my room. You stay here, I’ll be fine.”

“If you’re sure?” Liam didn’t look happy about letting her go, but he wouldn’t stop her.

She let him kiss her goodnight and held his face close to look at him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Victoria said, then she slipped out of the door and headed back to her room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter, The Wreck of our Hearts, is by Sleeping Wolf. 
> 
> I'm not sure where this chapter came from. Pieces of it came from trying to write the previous chapter, filling in various things I wanted to mention before the end of the book, which in this case was the reveal that Liam carefully kept Victoria's outfits as he knew she bought them herself. That conversation somehow got heated and I realised I had started to write a sex scene and then it got bigger and as gratuitous as it felt, suddenly the ending hit like a wallop and I realised why this scene mattered. And by now it was big enough for a chapter on its own, so I really hope you don't feel cheated by this addition.


	26. Miss Missing You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The year rounds off with a New Years Eve ball that is certain to go with a bang.

_Sometimes the person that you take a bullet for is behind the trigger_

If Christmas Day was a quiet, private affair, the New Years Eve Ball was the polar opposite. Victoria had thought the palace housed many servants, but suddenly she felt like she couldn’t move for staff bustling around to tidy and clean the already pristine palace, ready rooms for the guests' arrival and dress the ballroom for the event. The colour scheme for the decorations was red and gold and that was to be the colour the guests were to dress in as well. They would look like shiny Christmas baubles spinning around the buffed dance floor.

Victoria stayed out of the way of the staff, which meant her usual haunt of the kitchen was out for the time being. It was a wrench to be parted from the warmth of the kitchen, not to mention it left her hands idle when they could have been busy kneading bread and working through the worries in her mind. The library was relatively quiet until the guests started arriving and suddenly the place was popular enough to drive her away. Thankfully with his over-the-top generous Christmas present, Liam had granted her an out. Victoria’s new place to hide was the stables.

The vast grounds around the palace had ample space to ride out in and Victoria took no time at all getting to know her new horse. She wasn’t allowed to ride alone, but given that she would have definitely gotten lost Victoria couldn’t help but agree with that rule. Making her enforced chaperone easier to deal with was the fact that she was assigned a groom to ride with her, who was both stoic and gruff and didn’t see the need to speak to her. It became the best part of her day to bundle up herself and her horse and set out for a long, leisurely ride around the palace grounds with Neal and his mount even if her backside and legs were constantly aching from the exercise. Raven Queen was young, but she had a sensible head and proved to be an excellent companion.

While she rode across the snowy fields, Victoria tested herself. It was clear that although Liam was determined to put no pressure on her, that time was running out. She couldn’t date Liam forever and would be expected to leave the palace in the new year. Off to her duchy or back to the Beaumonts, but her time in proximity to Liam was drawing quickly to an end. She pictured herself and Raven Queen at this duchy she was inheriting, the two of them alone in some far-flung place she’d never seen before, her friends scattered. Perhaps Hana and Maxwell would come to stay and she presumed Liam would, too, but what of the others? Had she lost more than she’d gained by delaying her happily ever after, as Drake had put it?

From horseback in the peaceful quiet of her rides, Victoria let her mind wander. She imagined Liam proposing to her, properly, not like the uttered words of his orgasm. Getting down on one knee and producing a ring. She pictured it before a crowd of thousands, with just their friends in attendance, or just the two of them. She set the proposal at a ball, on the beach, in his bedroom, right here on the grounds. She imagined saying yes demurely, shouting it from the rooftops, holding back tears. She saw Liam's face when she agreed; smiling, beaming, laughing, crying tears of elation. Every scenario different, though following the same script. And every time she imagined it, the tight vice of fear clamped around her torso, squeezing the air from her lungs. Once or twice Neal had urged his horse to come up beside her so he could press a handkerchief into her hand as she shed silent tears, but other than that he didn’t pry.

What was the matter with her? What was this reflex to tear her into pieces when she tried to face the fact that Liam wanted to marry her? Was this about her trusting him or about punishing herself?

The only thing she knew for certain was that if she couldn’t figure out what was holding her back, she would only keep making everyone miserable. And that wasn’t what she wanted to do.

*

On new years eve, Victoria dressed in the same golden gown she’d worn for the Coronation Ball. The dress elicited mixed feelings for her, both the delight of her first time with Liam and the trauma of the reveal of her assault by Tariq and the subsequent treatment by Bastien and the press afterwards. She was determined to give this dress a better outing and make better memories, resolved to face every one of her friends that night.

She entered the ballroom alone, announced as “Duchess Victoria Quinn”. The hem of her gown whispered along the floor as she entered. Her hair was curled and piled atop her head by a maid who had been eager to play with her dark hair and a comb glinted in the light. Rather than the black capelet, she had donned for the Coronation Ball, Victoria had a pale gold organza shawl wrapped over her shoulders and tied in a knot behind her, leaving her hands free, but back covered. It was less dramatic than the look she had gone with for the gowns first outing, everything was softer, more romantic. It seemed appropriate. She didn’t want to stand out on this night.

Liam made a beeline straight for her and when he reached her he swept her into his arms with a kiss right there in front of everyone. Despite the lurch in her stomach, she melted into him for a moment, before stepping away, eyes down, demure. She was not blind to the flashes of cameras or the murmurs as the press and the guests alike began discussing this new turn of events. Out of the corner of her eye, she even saw someone pointing to her then turning to her friend beside her and gesturing to her ring finger. She wished she’d worn gloves to cover her bare left hand. Liam was either oblivious to the gossip or determined to ignore it. “Shall we dance?”

“Ok.” Victoria nodded, though her knees were trembling and she half expected to fall flat on her face at the first turn. Just like the first dance she had shared with Liam when she had known none of the steps, he held her fast and with his confident leading, she managed to get through the waltz.

When the song ended Victoria spied the striking red hair and plunging scarlet gown of Olivia and made her excuses with Liam to head for her friend. Olivia was on the outskirts of the dance floor holding a glass of deepest red wine and she watched Victoria's approach.

“Hi Olivia,” Victoria said, suddenly nervous. “How was your Christmas?”

“Quiet,” Olivia replied. It was always hard to read her, but when her eyes flashed to Victoria's hands it was plain to see what was running through her head. “The knives were well received.”

“I’m sure you have hundreds, but I wanted to share a bit of American history with you,” Victoria said attempting a smile that felt more like a grimace. “And I wasn’t sure what your stance on guns was, so… knives.”

“We don’t go in for guns as much as you Americans,” Olivia explained. “I have some antique pistols and a rifle in my collection though, plus the gamekeepers have their shotguns. Personally, I prefer blades. You did well. I didn’t get you anything.”

“You’re here,” Victoria said, gratefully. “And you’re still my friend?”

Olivia peered down at Victoria, her trademark heels and commanding presence making her seem ten feet tall. “Yes, I am your friend.”

“That’s all I need,” Victoria said truthfully as gratitude flowed through her. “I know you don’t understand—”

“Victoria, don’t,” Olivia said, lowering her voice, her tone softening for the first time. “I don’t need to understand. It’s your business. I’ve licked my wounds and now I’m back for tonight. Let’s leave it there.”

Victoria nodded. “Alright.”

Olivia returned the nod and then, never one for small talk, turned on her heel and stalked away to talk to someone else. Victoria felt a small sense of peace to know that Olivia wasn’t holding anything against her after all.

A waiter passed with a tray of champagne and Victoria took one gladly, happy to have something to occupy her hands. The band struck up another dance and she stood to watch the couples pair off and give the people a show. The dance was faster, less romantic than the Cordonian Waltz and she was glad to be sitting this one out. Someone tapped on her shoulder and Victoria turned. “Oh, hello Justin.”

He smiled, warmer than he had been the last time they spoke. “Hey there Duchess. How does it feel?”

“Strange.” She admitted. “No-one told me that I’d need to go up in the ranks before I could be acceptable as a future fiancee.” Victoria shrugged. “I feel like I’m never going to fully understand the way this all works.”

“Yes, the monarchy is pretty complicated.” Justin agreed easily. “Lots of archaic laws and rules written so deeply in the past. It really takes some getting used it. Still, even as a single woman, getting your promotion has really helped my job. I’ve been making sure that folks know that this is a step in the right direction for you. Today duchess, tomorrow future queen!” He laughed, turning to watch the dance as the men lifted their partners in a spin. Victoria felt queasy and gulped her champagne, which did nothing to settle her nerves.

“Excuse me, Justin.”

“Yes, sure, go mingle,” Justin said grinning. “It’s a party after all!”

Victoria focused very hard on putting one foot in front of the next as she crossed the room, putting as much distance between her and her press secretary as possible. He was just doing his job, she knew that. She set down her glass and took another one the first chance she got before she reached the opposite side of the dance floor. Victoria cast her gaze about, unable to find a friendly face.

“Good evening, duchess Victoria.” Victoria winced and turned to offer a shaky smile at Madeleine.

“Countess Madeleine.” She said, inclining her head for a greeting. “How are you?”

She was dressed in pale gold, only a shade warmer than her skin and hair. Her green eyes were piercing against the backdrop of gold. “Apparently better than you,” Madeleine observed gesturing to her with her half-empty flute. “You look ghastly, dear.”

Victoria tried for nonchalant, but the shrug and smile both felt off-kilter. “I… haven’t been sleeping much.”

“Oh? Are the beds in the palace not to your liking?” Madeleine asked. Her expression was austere, her words poison. “What a pity.”

“Madeleine, I’m really sorry about how everything went down between us,” Victoria said, lurching forwards to what she wanted to say as she was finding the pleasantries too difficult to tackle. Madeleine arched one cool brow. “I never wanted that video released during your shower and I feel dreadful about it.”

“Oh, don’t worry about me,” Madeleine said. “I’ll survive. I always do.” With that she swept away, leaving Victoria to blink after her with no idea if she’d made things better or worse.

Victoria finished her second glass and set it down with shaking fingers. She needed to slow down or she would end up repeating the night her drink was spiked, only this time she would have nobody to blame but herself. She turned to look again for friends and found them.

On her first night out without her son, Savannah was dressed in a floor-length red with her dark hair in loose curls around. Her lips were painted red and she was laughing beside her brother, who was equally striking in black dress pants, a red shirt and a waistcoat embroidered with golden leaves. His jacket was slung over the chair he was sat on and to his right sat Liam, with Maxwell next to him. Maxwell was a sparkly Christmas delight of a glittery gold and red jacket, and when Victoria concentrated she could see the golden streaks were in fact tentacles. His shoes were the same sparkly golden and he seemed totally at home as he told a story giving big arm gestures, drawing more raucous laughter from his group. Hana materialised over Savannah's shoulder and she bent down to kiss Savannah on the cheek in greeting, before sitting with the rest of them, her classic cheongsam the dark red of ripe cherries.

They were so happy. This was how they would have looked if Victoria hadn’t ever come to Cordonia in the first place. If she’d spent that evening with Liam visiting the Statue of Liberty and then let him go and gotten on with her life. Liam would be married to someone, maybe even Hana if he’d had the chance to choose. She couldn’t picture him picking Madeleine if he didn’t have to, although maybe Hana would have been targeted by Constantine to engineer the Rys-Amaranth wedding. Either way, she knew Hana and Liam would have become friends.

She wasn’t sure what propelled her forwards, but Victoria found herself steadily walking over to the gang as Maxwell launched into another story. She wanted to fit in with them, missing their easy companionship. They’d fought for her and she was now free of the scandal. That was worth celebrating, even if she wasn’t yet engaged. They’d want her there. Wouldn’t they?

Drake saw her first and the look he shot her blew through her as if she’d stepped outside in the snow. Before she could reach them he stood and made some excuse, and striding off sharply. Liam, concerned for his friend and not seeing Victoria's approach, called after him and then followed behind. Victoria reached the group with a heavy heart.

“Hey guys,” she said sadly before offering a smile to Savannah. “It’s nice to see you again Savannah. How’s Bartie?”

Savannah got to her feet, her smiles vanished and her eyes cold. “He’s fine thank you duchess Victoria.” She seemed to consider something for a moment, in which Maxwell coughed uneasily. “Would you mind coming with me for a moment, please? I’d like to speak with you away from the ball if I may?”

Victoria cast a glance to Hana and Maxwell, but turned back to Savannah and nodded. “Of course. I bought Bartie a present for Christmas, so we can go by the tree if you like?”

“Fine.” Savannah dotted quick kisses on Maxwells and Hanas cheeks then hurried from the hall, Victoria treading sombrely behind in her wake.

Outside the ballroom it was quiet. The enormous dressed tree stood in a drawing-room just off the main hall, far enough out of earshot that they could speak privately. Once inside Victoria went to the tree where the gifts for Bartie, Savannah and Drake sat. “It’s not much, I’m afraid.”

“I don’t want it.” Savannah snapped before Victoria could reach the present. She froze her hand outstretched, curling her fingers back at Savannah's words. “I don’t want anything from you.”

“Oh.” Victoria took a deep breath and turned. “What do you want then?”

“I want to give you a piece of my mind,” Savannah retorted sharply. “I know you’re a duchess now and dating King Liam or whatever you want to call it, so I’m sure this isn’t my place and could be called treason probably, but you need to hear this. You are a selfish, cruel woman and the way you’ve treated my brother is sickening.”

Victoria took the blow without trying to defend herself, but Savannah had more to say.

“Drake is a mess,” Savannah said. “He’s not sleeping, he’s barely eating, though he’s finding plenty to drink.”

“I’m sorry,” Victoria managed softly. “I never meant to hurt him—”

“Well, you did.” Savannah snapped. “I don’t care what intentions you had, however good they were, but you need to stop this. Stop stringing him along.”

Victoria's mouth dropped open and for a moment she couldn’t speak. “I’m not. I told him I was with Liam, I chose to be with Liam. How is that stringing him along?”

“The way I see it,” Savannah continued as if Victoria hadn’t spoken, her voice rising steeply, “is that you’re not quite set on marrying the king so you’re keeping Drake in your back pocket just in case you need an escape. You’re selfish and you don’t seem to care that Drakes being hurt.”

Victoria wanted to be a good person. Take her lumps, some of which felt justified. Maybe she’d understand it more if she had a sibling who had been hurt, but despite her attempts to stay calm, she could feel a red mist rising.

“That’s enough.” She cut through Savannah's accusations with a snarl. “Do you want to know why I couldn’t ever be with Drake? Do you really want to know? Because from the moment I met him all he could see was what happened to you. He warned me over and over that I would be wrecked by court like you had been. That they would only ever treat me as a commoner and never one of them, that I would get stomped on until I had to run away as you did.”

“How dare—”

“He never knew what happened to you.” It burst out of Victoria and she took a step closer, thrusting her finger under Savannah's nose. “You left and never bothered to let him know you were alive, let alone that you had a baby. I hurt him, I won’t deny that, but _you_ broke him. Call me all the names you want, but you were the person who broke his trust in people and made it impossible for him to be open to the possibility of a relationship.” Victoria could feel anger heat her skin as everything she’d kept inside rose to the surface. “You’re the reason he was so horrible to me when I first met him.”

Savannahs face was rigid, her dark eyes, so similar to Drakes were filling with angry tears. “I did what I had to do.”

“By running away from Drake?” Victoria asked, well aware she was crossing a line now and dragging up old wounds she had no right to talk about. “By hiding from him? By keeping the truth from Bertrand? Yeah, I’ve hurt Drake, but you hurt him, Bertrand _and_ Maxwell. You want to talk about cruelty?” The words were pouring out now. She’d always been afraid of turning into her father, but this stockpiling of ammunition to bombard the other woman with for maximum damage, that was all Kate. “You kept Bertrand's child away from him, caused a rift between the brothers because Maxwell had to keep your secret. You almost destroyed Maxwell and Drakes friendship.” She listed grievances on her fingers. “You’re the selfish one.”

“Quinn!” Both women jumped and turned to the sound of Drake storming towards them. Savannahs tears spilled with the motion and she fell into her brothers' arms. Victoria took a step back, seeing the distress she had caused Savannah.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it,” she stammered, angry at herself for giving in to Kate’s whispers that the bitch had it coming, her apology unheard over the woman's sobs. Drake glared at her over his sisters head.

“Go back to the ball, Savannah,” Drake said, looking down at her. “Fix your make up and head back.”

“No,” Savannah sniffed. “I don’t feel like it anymore. I’m going home. Are you coming?”

Drake glanced at Victoria again. “Not yet. I want a word with Quinn first.” Savannah looked between them and for a moment she almost looked sorry for Victoria before she flew through the door and back to wherever their apartment was.

Victoria crossed her arms, looking down, unsure whether she had any fight left. “She wanted to talk to me.” She started with, her jaw set defensively. “I just wanted to give her a present. For her and Bartie.”

“We don’t need anything from you.” Drake snapped. “Least of all for you to throw your sanctimonious crap at Savannah. She’s found it hard enough coming back to court.”

“I understand that—”

“If you understand it then why are you giving her a hard time?” His voice rose over hers. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

Victoria didn’t have an answer for that. She looked up at him, her strength drained. She really didn’t have any rebuttal. “You promised nothing would change.” She said after a while in a small voice. “You told me I didn’t have to worry… that you’d be OK whatever I chose.”

Drake shuddered at her words, his eyes darting to the doorway as if realising that he had elected to remain alone with her as if her bringing up their grievances hadn’t occurred to him until then. “I said it wouldn’t affect me and Liam.” He replied curtly. “I don’t owe you anything.”

“I’m sorry,” Victoria said, dropping her arms and trying to take a step, but he backed away as soon as she moved. She froze, her heart in her throat. “I never meant to hurt you.”

Drakes jaw was working overtime holding back whatever he wanted to say, unable to meet her eye. Victoria pressed the advantage, a perverse part of her desperate to push him into lashing out if that were the only way he would tell her the truth. “Drake, please look at me. What we shared was—”

“No, stop.” Drake snapped, turning on her. “Don’t. You _used_ me, Quinn. You were sad and lonely and you made a deliberate choice that night. All the flirting and that damned drinking game. I was just there and stupid.”

“You aren’t stupid,” Victoria said quickly. “I just thought that… that we could have something for a little while.”

Drake laughed. It was a harsh sound devoid of mirth. “That’s all I ever was to you. Someone nice to look at and a cheap one night stand. Thanks, Quinn. Means a lot.”

“No, that’s not it. _You_ mean a lot to me.” Victoria said, stepping forward again. He had nowhere left to go, the wall was behind him. “You meant a lot that night.”

“For God's sake, Quinn, save it.” Drake snarled. “I told you the next day how I felt about you; you can’t tell me you had no idea. You just brushed my feelings aside.”

Victoria flinched. “That’s not fair.” She refuted hotly. “I had no idea you felt anything more for me than basic attraction, which I never pretended wasn’t mutual. You never acted like you loved me, how the hell was I to know?” Another bullet slipped into the chamber as the thought she had quashed since that night came to the forefront of her mind and she let it fly. “But you had information I didn’t have; you knew what Liam and Bertrand were doing, you knew I still had a chance to be with Liam. That didn’t stop you from sleeping with me.”

Drake flinched, turning away from her. His hands clenched into fists, shame and anger vying for control on his face. “What do you want me to say? That I took advantage of you?”

Victoria didn’t know what she wanted him to say. She just wanted him to tell her everything would be alright between them and to understand. She tried to shake off the influence of her mother, telling her to go for the kill while he was exposed and wounded and instead cautiously crossed the space between them and touched her fingers to his back, tentative and afraid. “Drake—”

He spun, arm flying out to throw her hand off him. “Would you just hurry up and marry him already?” Drakes chest was rising and falling rapidly, his brows drawn angrily, but there were tears in his eyes. “If you love him, have him.”

“It’s not that simple,” she started, but he snorted derisively.

“It _is_ that simple.” Drake rebuffed her. “You love him, he loves you, so just get married and put to rest any chance—” he broke off, his voice catching. “I get that you don’t want me.” He managed haltingly. “You tell me you made a choice, but leaving him waiting for you… leaving us both hanging… it’s not fair.” One of the tears trembled over his eyelid and dropped to his shirt, sinking into the red fabric. “Rationally I know you’ve chosen him, but in my heart, I keep on hoping you’ll change your mind. Every day you make him wait is adding fuel to that fire.”

Victoria was frozen in place, shame enveloping her. “I’m—”

“Don’t apologise again.” Drake held up a hand as if to physically cut the words from the air should she speak them. “Just don’t. I feel like you’ve got us both on a line. Cut me loose already. Marry him. Kill the possibility of us. Please.”

Victoria didn’t speak again. What could she say? She’d hadn’t even considered that her choice would directly affect anyone other than her and Liam. Drake looked at her, his face weary. The hollow expression in his eyes was like a knife to the gut. He opened his mouth as if to speak to her, but no sound came out.

Wordlessly they came to the same conclusion to head back to the ballroom and walked instep in silence. Victoria hugged her arms around herself as they walked, hating the cold breach that was ever widening between her and the man who walked beside her. Drake slid his hands into his pockets, but there was nothing casual about the gesture. He was as tense as a drawn bow and Victoria worried he might snap in two before they reached their destination.

As they drew up to the closed doors of the ballroom they heard shouts from inside. A countdown. Victoria turned and glanced at the grandfather clock in the hall; it was seconds to midnight. She turned to Drake and they shared a tired look. “Just in time?” she said quietly.

Then the lights went out.

“Quinn?”

As Victoria groped for the door handle she felt Drake's hand wrap around her wrist. Before she could say anything about it, a sound echoed around the ballroom, a sound that sped through the wooden doors and beat adrenaline into Victoria's heart. More sounds joined the first. Sounds she hadn’t heard in years, not since she had left the ruin of her family behind, but sounds she knew well.

“Drake,” she uttered in the darkness, “someone’s shooting.”

“Where are the guards?”

Someone started screaming. Victoria leapt forwards, crashing against the door, desperate to find the handle. She felt the brushed bronze and tugged. “We have to get them out.”

“Quinn, watch it,” Drakes warning was accompanied by him helping to grab the doors and fling them open. The lights flickered and dim emergency lights came on, casting a wan glow on the ballroom. “Come on, this way!”

The stampede of nobles, servants and press hurried to the door, but Victoria hugged the wall and pushed inside. “Liam?”

“Quinn,” Drake was at her heel, his hand pressed against her elbow.

She couldn’t see Liam. Couldn’t see Hana or Maxwell, Bertrand or Olivia. All she could see were panicked faces running past, some cradling their arms or holding hands over their faces. Blood was smeared across some of them, but they were getting out. More shots sounded and she instinctively crouched, covering her head. She could see shadowy figures blurring through the red and gold gowns or the white and black of the staff. She turned her hand reaching out and finding Drakes hand and squeezing.

“Stay close.” She said, reading determination in his eyes. She released his hand. “We have to find our friends.”

“Kid…” Victoria's head snapped around to see Justin lying on the ground, a pool of blood spreading from his side. She started to head for him, keeping low, stumbling on the hem of her dress. A cry sounded to her right and she glanced over to see Kiara collapse on the ground, her hand clamped around her arm, blood spreading between her fingers.

“Drake help Kiara,” she cried, continuing for Justin. “Justin, let me see.”

His glasses were askew and his eyes widened as he took in something behind her, pointing past her shoulder. “Look out!”

She turned to see someone stalking towards her, reaching for a gun in a holster at his hip. Victoria stood, hands out as if to show she was unarmed. The man was broad and wore a mask over his face. “What do you want?”

Just past the man, she saw Drakes face, terror across his features as he scrambled to his feet towards her. “Victoria, _run_!”

The masked man aimed his gun, readying his attack. He was so close. It would be quick.

 _Liam_ …

“Goodbye, princess.”

The shot rang out through the ballroom and Victoria crashed to the ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song for this chapter is by Fall Out Boy. I think Miss Missing You came on while I was playing either this book or the next and I just couldn't get it out of my head for this scene. 
> 
> You know the drill by now; I post a chapter and then wince about all the changes I made, but I'm not going to do that this time. I've told the story I wanted to tell and I'm actually kind of proud of it, changes and all. That said I hope Savannahs anger at Victoria doesn't read like a character assassination; the fierce sibling protectiveness feels like it should go both ways. 
> 
> I'm so grateful to everyone who's read this as I've posted and thank you for your encouragement. I will always been grateful for every hit, kudos and comment. Thank you! 
> 
> I don't yet know when the final story in the trilogy will be posted, but look out for The Ashes if you enjoyed this. Thanks again!


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